y/n: your name

tws: swearing, drinking

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

y/n's pov *

"should i even go to this thing?" i frowned, sorting through the rack of clothing in my closet with the critical assessment of a fashionista— which, granted, i wasn't, but i wanted to act like one.

"obviously you should go, what kind of question is that?" naomi retorted, and my phone vibrated against my desk with the shrill sound of her voice.

i reached over and picked it up to tuck it between my ear and shoulder as i continued to look at outfits.

"i don't know, just like— it's not like i was in any of these peoples' cliques or anything. it's a reunion. am i imposing?"

"this cora chick invited you did she not? i think you should go. even if you weren't friends with these people before, everyone is your friend at a party. that's just how it is."

"i guess you would know huh," i sighed, giving up and flopping back against my bed. "whatever though. enough about this party. how's cali? how are your classes?"

"okay mother," she snickered, "it's good i guess, i don't know. i don't have a lot of my sciences right now, so it just kinda feels like busywork." she paused. "i guess there is— like— a guy—"

"there's already a guy?" i sputtered, sitting up.

"not actually! he's just— like— in my philosophy class, and he's.. nice. i don't think he's a med student because i only have him in that class, but like— i don't know. i don't know."

my jaw dropped. "what's his name, what's he look like—"

"oh— bitch no, we are not doing this right now—"

"are you flustered?"

"no, fuck you—"

"oh my god, i can practically see the red on your cheeks from here! what is that— like an emergency beacon?"

"oh shut up! i'm just.. observing. he's cute. and nice. and like— i may or may not be paired with him for a project and have to go over to his apartment later okay bye—"

"naomi?" i shouted into the phone, but she had already hung up. "oh my god." i quickly swiped to our text conversation.

you know ur phone sends me a message when you put on ur horny playlist right

i'll fucking know

calm your tits woman

i'm playing it cool

you are not cool

you are very uncool

😐😑😐

i'll hop on a plane rn just to slap you

do it bitch i miss you

come back :(

:(

ily

dw about me going to this guy's place, in all seriousness i'm getting good vibes

plus he's short so if he does try something i can deck him no cap

alright dwayne the rock johnson

u better not try something either

i won't

fr though he makes my stomach go 🦋🦋🦋

wtf is that shit

get me a flyswatter

bahaha

ok ok just be careful

no more toxic men

hon it's a surprise i'm even interested in a man i think that's a good sign in of itself

okayyy

ily have fun with philosophy boy

wait can i call him phil

that's not his name but ok

i love you too you sexy bitch have fun with clay at the party

lots of fun ;))

😐😐

i sent the last text and tossed my phone to the end of my bed, running my hands through my hair once.

the party.

my gaze flicked to the rack of clothes in my closet, idly sorting through the different colors and patterns in my head as my stomach sunk with a feeling of dread.

why was i so nervous? it's not like i had to impress these people, and yet here i was stressing out about something as simple as what to wear.

i shook my head and leapt up to close my closet doors.

i wasn't going to bother with this.

but as i moved across my room, the sunlight streaming in through my blinds shifted its placement and a single beam traced its way across my walls till it just barely touched the clothes i had hung up. a single flash of glimmering light shone in my vision before dissipating entirely, and i paused in my tracks, confused.

i didn't own anything that would sparkle like that.

i frowned and stepped forward, parting my rack of clothes to search. after a second of digging, there, in the very back of my closet and labeled with a purple sticky note, was a little black dress— tight around the waist, mesh fabric layered with a sheer sparkle that glistened just right when i moved it a certain way.

my brows raised, and i swiped the note off of the sleeve and smoothed out the paper to read it.

hey sexy, this is my emergency hot girl dress and i wanted you to have it since i'm not going to be around :) it never fails. go rock it like i know you will — nomi

oh.

i shrugged the dress off the hanger and held it to my chest like a hug as i shuffled back over to my phone.

your emergency hot girl dress?

i'm gonna cry

no don't cry you'll ruin the fabric or something

if ur thinking of wearing it to the party, do it

those losers won't even know what hit them babe

akshsksjk thanks

i clicked off my device again and let the black fabric of naomi's dress pool in my lap, running my hands across the scratchy sparkles.

i couldn't turn down an opportunity to wear this, could i?

. . .

i shimmied as i shifted the hug of the dress on my waist, smoothing the gleaming fabric till i was satisfied with the way it looked on me. i turned side to side in the mirror and mustered a small but nervous smile.

i was doing this.

patches swatted at my converse shoelaces with a clumsy playfulness, and i chuckled, picking her up and cradling her like a baby in my arms as i continued to look at myself in the mirror.

"what do you think?" i asked her, scratching her chin.

she chirped once, and i smiled, content with that answer.

clay parted my already half-open door and stepped in my room, his face lighting up with a smile as i turned to look at him with his cat in my embrace.

"look at my girls all dressed up," he cooed, coming over to snake his arms around my waist and scratch patches on the head. he buried his face in the crook of my neck, fluffy hair tickling my cheek. "you look beautiful," he mumbled against my skin, his breath hot before he kissed the very spot where my pulse was racing because of the affection he was showing.

my girl.

that was a new one.

i set patches on the ground as she writhed with a sudden impatience and spun so i was facing clay, pressing a quick kiss to the corner of his lips. "and you look very handsome. i had no idea i was scoring such a hot date tonight," i mused, running my hands underneath the collar of his shirt and straightening it out.

"i'm always hot, you should've figured that out by now," he grinned, and i poked his chest with my finger.

"and always cocky too."

we chuckled, and i turned halfway to briefly glance at myself in the mirror again. clay followed my gaze and tightened his hands on my waist at the sight of me, sighing and kissing my neck again. "don't be nervous baby. this is gonna be fun."

"who said i was nervous?" i smiled, leaning back into him and taking comfort in the warmth of his body as it pressed flush with mine.

he smirked against my skin and traced his hand featherlight down my arm, goosebumps pricking with the trail of his finger until he reached my wrist, which he lifted to his lips to press a soft kiss to. "your pulse did."

my heart beat faster as he said it and i shyly took my hand back. "i'd.. tell you that it was racing from other things, but i think it'd go straight to your head," i chuckled nervously, meeting his eyes in the reflection of the mirror.

he raised an eyebrow and, as predicted, a smug smile took over his lips again. "what kind of other things—"

"haha, no, nope, nope, we are not gonna unpack that right now—" i laughed, turning bright red as i dodged his reaching arms and went for my coat hanging on the door.

clay was faster than i was and snaked an arm across my waist, stopping me dead in my tracks and momentarily lifting me off my feet as he slung me back to him.

"no no, i think we should," he said perfectly calm, and i squirmed in his arms as he held me against him. the only thing that made him budge even a little was the fact that i was laughing, which shook his hand up and down with the flexing of my stomach.

"release me villain!" i yelled, kicking my feet.

"elaborate on what you said before and i will consider it."

"fuck— fuck off you massive dickhead—"

"ohhh i get it, so my massive dick is one of the things—"

"no—"

we both let out a loud, honking wheeze and crumpled at the same time, leaning into each other for support as we tried and failed to catch our breath.

it was like we had just both deflated completely.

"s-seriously though, i— hhh—" clay lost it again and lifted his arm from my waist to wipe a tear from his eye— "i wanna know what makes your heart race like that. what— what gives you butterflies."

"you do idiot," i chuckled, using the opportunity of freedom to turn and face him, "your.. your voice, your hands, the way you kiss me, the way you touch me.. you. just.. you."

he broke out in a grin and pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead. "good," he said simply, and linked his hand with mine. "good."

"good?"

"good!" he repeated like it had made perfect sense the first time, and i rolled my eyes with a smile.

we left the house shortly after that, clay taking the driver's seat and me taking the passenger's as usual. the music was loud the whole way, and he drummed his fingers against my thigh to the beat of every song that came on. we went through a lot of playlist changes and a lot of fighting for the aux. the drive was almost two hours after all, and we were getting a little antsy by the end of it. but once we pulled into the right neighborhood and saw the big three-story house alight with flashing colors and felt our hearts start to thump with the sound of the booming bass from inside, we knew it was worth it, because this was going to be one hell of a party by the looks of it.

"holy shit," i breathed out as we filed into the house, a shiver shooting down my spine at the intensity of it all. clay put a guiding hand on the small of my back as we bumped shoulders with the initial crowd by the door and made our way to stand by the stairwell instead, locked together as we took in the partygoers one step at a time.

"cowabunga!" a guy yelled from the landing, and jumped into a plastic laundry basket without a second thought, launching himself down the stairs with both fists pumped high in the air as he yelled an excited scream that riled up the rest of the crowd.

"trent! i swear to fucking god— you are a mess! a disaster—" a girl scolded playfully, smacking him upside the head with her hand. he whined and she rolled her eyes, suppressing a smile, though her attention quickly drifted from him to us and she broke out in a wide grin. "y/n! and blondie!"

"hey cora!" i greeted unsurely, already feeling overwhelmed by the early-party chaos.

she wrapped both arms around my shoulders and gave me a quick but tight hug before pulling back, grabbing both my hands and swinging them loosely between us. "i'm sooo glad you made it. you would've been missing out if you didn't come."

"yeah, yup, i can definitely see that," i laughed, watching as trent and one of his friends went into the kitchen and started mixing some disgusting concoction from all the stuff in the fridge.

"you need a drink."

"i do?"

she nodded her head up and down and immediately tugged me along in a direction. i chuckled, looking to clay, who just shrugged with a smile as we followed her to a long buffet table that was stocked high with food and drinks. my eyebrows raised as i assessed the display, and i dunked my hand into the chip bowl, picking out a dorito and popping it in my mouth while cora started mixing three drinks. when she was done, she laid them out in a row in front of us.

"jell-o shots, my loves," she said simply, picking up one of the glasses and rotating it between her fingers like it was some fine, high-class concoction.

"you really don't take things slow, do you?" clay chuckled, taking his drink off the table and inspecting it the same way.

"not tonight i don't. i'm the most sober one here, and i've had three of these puppies and then some. i need buddies. now drink up, and get on my level."

clay and i exchanged another glance and shook our heads, bewildered, before raising our shot glasses.

"bottom's up," i said, and we all downed the contents.

and we downed... a lot more contents after that.

it wasn't enough to make us stupid, no, but after some time with cora, clay and i had slipped past the initial shock of the wild party and had become a part of it, slinking within the crowds and dancing body-to-body as the music moved us together, my nerves of coming here now dulled by the buzz of alcohol swimming in my system. not only that, but the excitement of the initial kick-off in general had died down, so the songs were more mellow, the conversations less hyper, and clay and i swayed with it, his chest pressed to mine as we moved together, hands on my hips grounding me despite us being in the center of the chaos.

"but baby i won't ever get enough, no, cause i'm so damn into you," he sang along with the song, his voice more tangible than audible as his chest rumbled against my ear. i leaned into it, warming at the words as he continued to sing them at me, and looked up to meet his green eyes in the close distance. i didn't want him to stop singing, so i brushed past his lips and kissed his jaw instead, softly running my hand across his shoulders as i felt him twitch into a small smile.

he was so quiet compared to the roar of the crowd and yet his voice was the only one i could hear.

for a moment at least.

"yo, dude, is your girlfriend like, single?" i picked up from a conversation across the room, "nah, i'm just playing, i'm just playing. for real, nice to meet you though, i'm—"

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—

"baby? you okay?" clay asked, tilting my chin up to meet his eyes. i hadn't realized mine had been shut, and i exhaled, drinking in the image of him to bring myself back.

"you remember how when we went to applebee's and you freaked because your ex was there?" i stated plainly, staring straight into his chest as i continued to listen to the conversation behind me.

"are you.. are you saying what i think you're saying?"

i nodded, my lips creasing into a thin line.

"which one?"

"he might not look the same anymore—"

"is it the chad looking guy?"

i glanced up at him and then briefly over my shoulder, catching a glimpse of brunette hair and deep brown eyes and a wide, deceivingly charming smile. "yup, nope, nevermind, he does look the same. great."

"what's his name?"

"jared."

"was he... bad?"

i met his eyes for a moment and found they were completely serious, creased just at the corners where they narrowed the more he looked at him.

"if you're asking if he's going to be cool like naomi, then no, he's not," i said. "he uh.. he cheated on me with someone i considered to be a friend and tried to lie about it."

clay's eyebrows knit together and he shifted his hands on my waist to hold me just a little tighter. "i'm sorry."

"don't be. it's fine. look who i've got now," i smiled reassuringly, and brushed my thumb across his stubbled cheek. the corners of his lips quirked upwards and he pulled his eyes away from jared to focus them on me, and on my lips, and on every feature of my face. there was an intensity in his gaze that made me think he was trying to memorize the image.

i threaded my fingers into his hair and tugged him down to meet me for a kiss, and everything went warm as we slotted together, his hand traveling lower down my back and pulling me impossibly closer to his chest. i ran my hand up his shirt and bunched the fabric in my hands as he deepened the kiss, teasing my bottom lip in a way that forced me to exhale even though i was out of breath.

i didn't even want to come up for air.

"woowee, you guys are so hot!" i heard cora call from the stairs, and clay and i parted slightly, huffing a laugh, hovering inches from each other's lips.

i turned to glimpse her and caught her waving at me from the second floor landing before going back to making out with elise.

and she had the audacity to call us hot.

i chuckled and went to turn back to clay, gaze just barely tracing across the room.

eye contact.

i froze.

jared's brows raised and his words trailed off as his eyes fixed on mine, and i darted my line of sight away and back up to clay.

"fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—" i muttered, this time out loud— and the blond in front of me gripped my arms and steadied me.

"it's fine, it's fine. it was just eye contact. he's not coming over," he assured, rubbing his hands up and down my goosebumped skin.

i glanced over my shoulder and saw him start to break away from his friend group and turned back to clay. "he's coming over isn't he."

"well—"

"shit." i looked up at clay, nervous. he wasn't focused on me this time, no, but across the room, and his jaw ticked, clenched impossibly tight.

"turn around," he said, suddenly stern.

"what? i'm not—"

"turn around."

"i—" i huffed and listened, reluctantly spinning so that i was facing jared head on. he weaved through the crowd, red solo cup in hand, grin wide as he looked me up and down with a painfully slow and assessing stare.

it made me cringe in the worst way.

"hey—" he started off, his words heavy with alcohol, and lifted his hand to wave, but he stopped in his tracks and i caught my breath in my throat, flinching as a sudden burst of pain shocked my skin.

what the—

clay swept my hair around my shoulders, and i shivered as the exposed skin pricked cold with goosebumps. i tried to catch a glimpse of him, wondering what the hell he was doing, but his eyes were already on me, half-lidded, burning intense. then, with absolutely no hesitation, he leaned in closer and kissed my bare neck, ignoring the way a gasp caught in my throat as he sucked hard enough to leave a bruise. he pulled away a moment later and hovered there, his hot breath now just tickling the sensitive area like he was playing with me, and tilted his chin up, making brief eye contact with jared as he paused dead in his tracks, frustrated.

the brunet went red faced and crinkled his cup in his hands. "ugh— fuck this—" he muttered, and stormed back to his friends.

clay's hands went lax on my waist and i looked up to face him, wide-eyed.

"see? that wasn't so hard," he smirked, running his tongue along his bottom lip, eyes locked on the fresh bruise that was forming on my skin.

he looked proud, cocky bastard.