Mom and dad don't see

The fights we have

They don't hear

Our shouting and screaming

Fists flying and bodies slammed

You're only thirteen

Still young- innocent,

I tried to protect that

But failed

My anger got the best of me

If only you could hear me

Every night- crying

Screaming in my bedroom

Until my voice is lost

Sound disappearing from my throat

If only you could see me

Punching my mirrors and walls

Gripping tufts of my hair

As I sit against the door

I don't mean my words

I don't mean to hurt you

And how I wish you didn't hate me

But I know I caused that feeling

Because I am angry

That no one was there for me

I tried to be a role model

But I never had one myself

And my anger got the best of me

I'm glad you can't hear me

Screaming behind my bedroom door

The explicit choice of words

That fly off my tongue

As I stare in the cracked mirror

I'm glad you can't see me

Throwing my fists into the walls

Until they split open, bleeding

My anger gets the best of me

And I wish you could understand

That my hatred is never for you

But you bring it out of me

A reminder of the hatred I carry

For myself

Because I couldn't help you

Grow up in the way you should have

I'm not a good listener

And I can't think past

My own experiences in the world

That damaged me to this point

But I can at least say I tried

To protect your true identity

From corruption and consumerism

Though, I failed

Because my anger got the best of me.

And I wish you could see that

I don't hate you. I love you beyond imagination.

I just hate myself too much to know

How I could change to help you

At this point.