《Spectrum》18
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"Okay, so why don't they just hide?" Grayson asks quietly as our movie plays in the background.
"If they just go and hide, then there wouldn't be anyone there to help the hostages." I say.
"But that guy just killed a guy?" He adds.
"I know. That's why the three of them have to save everyone else."
He nods and turns to face the television. I look over and notice his face set in concentration. His attention to the screen looks forced, in a way.
"I'm going to run to the bathroom real quick." I say, standing up from my seat.
"Yeah, of course. You remember where it is?" He asks, turning his attention towards me.
"Yeah. Be right back." I say as he gives me a quick nod and focuses back towards the movie.
As I enter the bathroom, I notice the organization instantly. Different products are lined up on his countertop. Some things are so clean that they look unused.
The complete contrast to my own apartment is insane. The clutter throughout my entire home would probably give him anxiety. I can tell he's an organized person, which I can't relate to whatsoever. I look in the mirror and fix my hair quickly, noticing the mess it's become just from leaning back against his couch. Thankfully, the minimal makeup that I decided to wear hasn't worn off yet.
I can hear the movie still playing from the bathroom, and i've seen it enough to know that it's nearly over.
When I leave the bathroom, I see Grayson watching the credits roll over.
"You missed it." He says, motioning towards the screen. "The good guys won."
"I've seen it before. It was pretty good, yeah?" I ask.
"Yeah, it was." He says, giving me a small smile. I feel the silence cover us like a blanket. I'm not even sure if I should offer to go home yet or not. Right as I think of this, he speaks up.
"Wine?" He offers.
I smile widely at him and nod, earning a smile of his own.
He pours me a glass of the wine that i've been drinking all night, and then pours one for himself before coming back to the couch.
"For you." He says, handing me the glass. I take it carefully, not wanting to spin any on his couch. When I look back at the television, it's on the main Netflix screen. There's only silence in the room now, but it's not uncomfortable. I feel as though our silence is never uncomfortable.
"I thought you didn't drink." I point out, taking a sip from my glass.
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"I usually don't. Every now and then i'll have a glass of wine. Everything else gives me a headache." He says, taking a drink of his own.
"So i'm sure you can make a bottle last you awhile." I say.
"Not really. Once it's opened, it needs to be finished fairly quickly. Otherwise, it doesn't taste the same." He shrugs.
"So you just chug the entire bottle?" I tease.
"Shane does it for me." He says, earning a laugh from me.
"Somehow, it's not too hard to imagine Shane finishing your wine bottles for you." I laugh.
"One of the perks of him living so close to me." He adds.
"So, I feel like I need to know more about you." I say, turning my body to face him.
"What would you like to know?" He asks.
"Let's see..." I say, thinking to myself. "What's your favorite color?" I ask.
"Red." He replies. "What's yours?"
"Blue." I answer. "It's basic, I know." I say with a small laugh.
"Oh, and red isn't?" He counters with a smile.
"Touché." I laugh.
"What made you want to become a computer software engineer?" He asks.
"I guess it's just something I was always interested in. I used to be in this robotics club in high school, and it kind of introduced me into the engineering side of things. I was pretty good at it throughout high school and college. It wasn't until I started working for you that I realized how talented some people are." I say.
"You're one of those people too, you know." He says, setting his wine glass onto the glass table in front of us.
"I'll get better, I know it. Sometimes it's just hard being one of the only women in the company." I shrug.
"I can only imagine. Maybe I can talk to Shane about doing an outreach program. I want GRIP to be diverse and inclusive. I want everyone to feel comfortable working there. I don't want it to feel inclusive only to those who are male and white." He says seriously.
If I didn't think he was attractive before, he's practically flawless now. The fact that he can acknowledge the lack of diversity in his company is such an honest thing to admit.
"That would actually be amazing." I reply.
"Maybe that can be something we can start on when we get back to work? I think you would be the perfect person to help organize it. You're passionate. That's all you need to be." He says.
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"I would love that." I reply, giving him a soft smile. I can start to feel this last glass wine catching up with me with every smile I give him. I know if I have any more, i'm bound to be drunk in my boss's apartment. That definitely can't be a good look. I lean over and set the wine glass next to his and scoot just a tad bit closer to him. He doesn't seem to notice. Well, that or he just doesn't mind.
"Okay, next question." I say, crossing my legs and facing him.
"Go for it." He replies, leaning his arm against the back cushion to look at me.
"If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?" I ask.
He looks up slightly, pondering the answer to this question.
"Right here." He admits.
"In LA?" I ask with a giggle.
"Well, technically yes. But what I was talking about was right here. In my apartment with you. Drinking wine and watching movies. Asking each other questions." He elaborates.
I can feel my cheeks get hot at his answer. He just admitted that even if he could be anywhere else in the world right now, he would still choose to be here.
With me.
He's so close to me and I can see the glances he makes to my lips. I don't have time to think. I don't allow myself even a second to overthink this, because it's exactly what I want.
I lean closer and barely touch his lips to mine. He gasps quietly at how close I am, but never leans away from me once. He wants this as much as I do.
I press my lips against his softly at first, reveling in the way they feel. His lips are soft and his kiss is shy. As I begin to move my mouth slowly, he follows immediately. With nervous and fumbled movements, he allows himself to relax slightly enough to move in sync with my kiss. I feel his hand move down to my hip as he holds me gently. I can barely feel his grip on me, as though he is afraid to touch me. I move closer, sitting in his lap immediately. With one of his hands on my waist and the other resting gently on my thigh, I am in Heaven. Grayson is my own personal Heaven.
His mouth moves with my own slowly. I haven't had a kiss like this in what feels like forever. Every other man I have been with shoves their tongue down my throat and is too aggressive in their lip biting. Grayson doesn't do any of this, though. It's as if he knows exactly what I like. Almost desperately, he pulls me closer to him. I'm just as desperate for his touch.
I feel him harden underneath me as I move my hips ever so slightly against him, causing his grip on my hip to tighten just a little bit. I let out a soft moan at the feeling of him against me when suddenly, he jerks away from me. The sudden loss of contact surprises me, and when I look at him, I can tell something is wrong.
"What?" I ask, looking at his startled expression. He looks from my face down to where i'm sitting on his lap before gently lifting me off of him.
He stands up quickly, running a hand over his mouth in...shock? In regret? Hell, I don't even know.
"Grayson?" I ask softly, standing up to meet him. He takes a step away from me, keeping a foot distance between us.
"I didn't...I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry." He says quickly.
"Gray, you didn't do anything. It was me." I say, reaching for his hand gently. He pulls his hand away also, taking another step back.
"You should go." He blurts out quickly.
"What?" I ask, not believing what he's saying right now. He can't be serious, can he?
"You should go." He repeats. "We have work in the morning and it's getting late."
"Is...did I do something wrong?" I ask quietly.
"No! No, I just...I shouldn't have done that. It was extremely inappropriate. I'm sorry. I'll walk you out." He says, headings towards the door.
"I can walk myself out." I snap as I grab my things and march towards the door.
"Nat, wait." He says, but I don't give him the chance to continue as I walk out of the door and slam it behind me.
The embarrassment from his rejection is all I can feel right now. I just kissed my fucking boss. No, I just had a full blown make out session with my boss on his couch. What the hell was I thinking? This is exactly what everyone assumed was going on. I just practically confirmed what everyone always gossiped about.
All I know right now is that tomorrow morning is going to be the most awkward day in the entire working career.
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