This wedgie was requested by Illusai.

He requested a messy shoulder wedgie with oatmeal and custard. But since I can't physically do a shoulder wedgie, plus I didn't have any custard, we decided that a messy chair wedgie with oatmeal and eggs for 5 hours would be good enough

I don't know why, but whenever I try to do a messy wedgie it ends up mostly falling down my legs. And since this was a dare, I wanted to make it as bad as possible. So I decided to put on a pair of old shorts and tie the leg holes around my legs shut. They were tight enough so that nothing would spill out, while making sure that the wedgie wouldn't be affected in anyway.

The first thing I did was make the oatmeal. I made it extra chunky just for extra measure and let it cool. While it was cooling I found a metal chair with a high enough back to leave me hanging for a while, and I took out the eggs. That's when I remembered that Illusai never specified wether the egg had to be whole(shell included) or already cracked. So I decided to do both.

Here is where it gets a bit tricky. I like to give myself chair wedgies near the front door, that's conveniently near a big window. And whenever I do a wedgie that lasts more than an hour, I like to make a couple of backup plans just in case something happens. First I put a clean pair of pants next to me in case someone shows up. I washed every dish in the house except for the pot where I cooked the oatmeal in, that way there won't be evidence. And I even told my mom that I was going to the gym(it's a lie that works, don't judge). I also used a folding chair that's easy to move around, and has been inside the house for days, but no one seems to care. I also put on an old shirt in case it spilled to my back.

The oatmeal was warm, the egg was cold and I was ready for the sensation. But before I could do anything there were two things I noticed as I was about to pour the ingredients in my pants.

1. The oatmeal was too dry

2. There was only one egg

So I decided to mix the two together in a bowl and smear it with my hands. It felt great"!! Before I gave myself the wedgie I quickly washed my hands, which still smell like eggs btw.

I placed the chair down, hooked my underwear on the back, and slowly sat down, making sure that the oatmeal and egg combo is in place. It's so nice and warm. I could feel it smushing every time I bounced. The wedgie feels like it's sliding in and out every time I move. The timer was set and I'm ready to feel all 5 hours of this.

Hour 1:

It's barely been 10 minutes and something unexpected happen. Jehovas witnesses showed up in front of my door. Right now I'm nervous that they might see me, but at the same time getting a thrill out of it!! I start bouncing a bit, making the wedgie worst!! One of them looked through the door and I don't know why, maybe she was old or had bad vision, but they decided to leave. Something else I should mention is that I am really, really, excited. And I have a rule about not "relieving" myself until the wedgie is over. So I am currently in a state of never ending bliss.

Hour 2:

Nothing much happened in this hour. I started watching wedgie videos so that I can start feeling the messy more. Some cars drove by and the smell is starting to get to me. It stopped smelling like oatmeal and more like egg.

Hour 3:

I'm starting to get kinda bored with the messy. Don't get me wrong it feels great, but after a while you get used to it. I'm tired of bouncing and most of the ingredients have smeared on my back. I keep pushing them down as to make sure it stays messy, but even that is getting boring. I already yanked at the front a bunch of times and I'm running out of wedgie videos. So I messaged Illusai to see if he can give me something else, like an extra ingredient or something.

Hour 4:

Still no word from Illusai. I was so used to the wedgie I decided to switch it to the front. Might as well feel something right now. But before I did that I moved all of the oatmeal I could to the front. I already poured some before I started but I felt like it wouldn't hurt to add more. When I lowered my self on the chair I could feel all of the oatmeal squish around my genitals. I gave myself a few spanks on the back for good measure and continued watching wedgie videos. The smell of eggs had suddenly disappeared and all I could smell was oatmeal.

Final hour:

There's about thirty minutes left and I decide to go back to the normal chair wedgie. It was mostly a mix of pain and wanting to finish how I started. Good thing I wore an old shirt, because when I switched for a front wedgie, the oatmeal spread all over it. And thanks to that my stomach is now cold.

There's only 5 minutes left, so I start yanking my front and repeatedly jump in the chair so that I can end it on a high note. Before I know it the timer runs out. But before I get up, I decided to rip off my underwear to better see how dirty they are. And the answer is, pretty freaking dirty.