《Bitterly Sweetly》Chapter Thirty-four: Melody of All That Is Unsaid
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Max watched Sofia, like a hawk.
Watching her like that had been his motto of life, since when he could not remember. The reasons may vary from time to time but the gist was always the same, he could not restrain himself.
His hold on her hand prevented her stumbling away from her family. And when she recovered from the initial shock, Sofia took a step forward, looking at her entire family at the other side of the threshold. She looked on with this hell lot of emotion that made him hold his breath. While her eyes shimmered with tears, his shone with wonderment.
Every person in the Hayden family had that same duplicate look on their faces as well. Their eyes taking her in as though they were memorizing something precious that had been lost and had just somehow, only by fortune was returned to them.
Max totally agreed. She was really one precious person, so full of life and strength. And he had almost succeeded in diminishing all that!
It was time to mend that.
It took just a moment before the whole family stormed towards her.
They were all soon inside the house. It was a cabin extended into a mini mansion—a property of the Wilders just outside the city, used for occasions, vacations and picnics; and was now being used for the purpose of reuniting one of the precious persons in his life to her family, to her happiness.
Sofia's hand slipped away from his as they took her from him and he had to contain the protest that tried to come out of his mouth so suddenly. He followed her instead as her cousin, Samuel, embraced her fiercely.
"Sofi, I missed you so much," Sam cried.
Max had heard Sofia talking to her cousins over the phone—he might have eavesdropped a little. But she had never gone over to the Hayden house in the past weeks to physically meet them. Sofia was too scared about her grandfather's reaction and health. It was only Skyler who appeared at the hospital and before that at Mary's as per Max had heard. So, of course, the poor boy Sammy had suffered the sudden and long absence of the mother like figure in his life, just as Sofia had suffered the distance from her family.
Things were damaged, now they were going to be mended.
Sofia's aunt Marla looked pathetic as she shed two tears as well and apologized profusely for what all she had said and done in the hospital. The middle aged woman looked miserable with the self loathing words on her mouth.
Max recalled his lengthy talk with Marla weeks ago; he recalled talking personally to the authority of the rehab facilitation center she was taking therapies from. And he was pleased with himself that he could make Marla see some sense, although by using some cunning techniques.
Max smiled secretively. At the end of the day, after all, he was an efficient lawyer and his job was to put guilt upon where he saw fit for it to belong.
Marla held Sofia's hands in hers, looking every bit genuine. "Forgive me for always failing to be a better person. In the absence of your parents I was supposed to be the mother figure in your life, but hell, I couldn't even be a mother to my own children forget about being a mother to you. I am the one to blame for my lost place in the family, but my sufferings made me bitter to the point that I chose to always blame you, it had always been easier that way—"
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Sofia sniffled. "Aunt Marla—"
"I'm sorry—" her aunt cut in. "For always assuming the worst of you. I'm sorry for treating you the way I did that day at the hospital and even before then. We pushed and pushed and pushed you until you lied absolutely broken in that god forsaken hospital bed. After you were discharged from the hospital Max came over—" she looked down shamefully. "To have a talk with me. I wouldn't lie that I needed to hear what I heard, to see myself, for the first time, entirely in the mirror. When Skyler went to see you in the hospital, Max and Mr. Wilder had already told her everything about how your two actually got married. Sofia, you were already going through so much just to save us and our home and I—" Aunt Marla almost sobbed.
From where she stood, surrounded by her family, Sofia's face sprung up to the side. She looked up at Max in shock.
He just stared at her, heart thudding louder in his chest.
Skyler put a hand on Sofia's shoulder, diverting her attention and nodded in affirmation at Sofia's questioning look.
"No wonder," Aunt Marla said guiltily, bringing Sofia's attention back to her. "People call me a witch behind my back—"
"Please don't say that...," words muffled and stammering a little in emotions, Sofia hugged the broken looking woman and sobbed herself.
Max watched, with his own eyes filling up, as Skyler, her aunt and Sam kind of tackled Sofia into a group hug of some sort. The family found solace within one another's mindless words, releasing the stored up grieves and uniting again.
"There's one more person who's waiting with his whole heart to meet you, Sofia." Robert Wilder walked in through the door, pushing a wheel chair. Albert Hayden, Sofia's grampa was sitting on it, looking weak but emanating this splendid amount of excitement.
The moment Sofia's eyes fell on her grandfather, she ran forgetting her sore leg.
"Sofia!" In a blurry second, Max was next to her with long strides and caught her before her ankle could twist yet again.
Not under his watch! Never again.
"Careful," he whispered near her ear. That soft, feminine smell that was uniquely hers made him feel dizzy; it never failed to leave such an effect on him. One of these days, he feared, he wouldn't be able to hide it anymore.
Sofia slowly looked up as he helped her on her feet again. The very moment her eyes met his, he suddenly found himself completely taken aback, not because he could not read them but because there were just too many words for him to perceive. And before they could fleet he was desperate with the need to place them all under a microscope until everything was dissected, closely and entirely.
But this was the thing—she never failed to slip away from his hold, as quick as a handful of sand. His wishes, his desires were always unfulfilled.
While he helped her cross the rest of the distance to reach her grandfather, there was this abnormal quiet around him. From the corner of his eye he caught Sofia's entire family looking at the two of them awed, and hopeful and finally joyous. But casting all that out of his mind he let himself solely focus on the woman whose hand he still tightly held as she bent down to furiously hug her grandfather.
Above her shoulder, Albert Hayden or Oldbert as he always called him, gave Max a smile of relief and approval.
Robert's hand moved to rest on Sofia's head as a sign of giving blessing and affection.
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Max had never felt so much hopefulness ever before.
It was like, right at that moment, the entire Universe somehow tilted out of its route and a surge of power from all the living worlds in it managed to channel inside him.
He could feel her hand tremble in his as she sobbed and he rubbed his thumb in circles upon the back of it, trying to transfer some strength into her even if she needed none.
"Sofi!" Skyler, who had come to stand next to them, broke the emotionally charged moment. Sofia and her grandfather slowly separated to look at Skyler while each wiping their tear stained faces.
"Please end this episode of tears or it will become a drama show or something," Skyler cried playfully. "Now, let's go, we still need to get you ready before the party begins."
That got Sofia snap out of her teary state. "Party?"
"Yes, obviously," Skyler rolled her eyes. "Let me remind you that it's your birthday today and this—" She waved her hand around, pointing out the decoration around the house. "—is your birthday party. Now, come on. We can't let the guests find you like this—in your greyest shirt and pants, snotty faced and disheveled."
Sofia turned to look at Max in surprise. "But... how... you...," and by the look of it she was slightly unable in forming a proper sentence.
This made Max smile.
"Well," he explained simply. "We never forgot."
Even when she did.
She was utterly clueless how it was plain impossible to forget her. Ask him about it. Hadn't he tried just that for years, only to fail and come back as a bitter and miserable fool!
Sofia was dragged away by Skyler and her aunt after that.
For the next half an hour Max tried being a patient man. The key word—tried
He shuffled on his feet, rocked on his heels standing in a corner as one by one guests began to arrive and coaxed him into boring conversations about court cases and the shrewd world of politics.
Somehow, he managed to slip away from them without being rude.
He was happy dedicating himself into staring at the stairs, up where she was taken away by the women. But then, his father, Robert Wilder, and Sofia's grandfather along with his grandson, Sammy, approached him.
They, especially the eldest Hayden, talked with him casually and with smiles. However, Max could clearly see the doubts behind his politeness.
Same was the case with the youngest, Samuel Hayden—Sam. The kid looked minuscule next to Max's giant build yet he tried drawing himself up to his full height, and was a quiet creature—not because he was intimidated by Max but because of the feelings of rivalry. After all, it was the man who had stolen and hurt his sister. It was not hard for Max to understand it all by the sneaky, quick glares the kid was throwing up at him every now and then, enough to make him uncomfortable.
It was a given that all the Haydens, except the peculiar case of aunt Marla, were still very wary about him, or to be precise, about his out-of-the-blue-getting-married stunt that had been exposed recently under morbid circumstances.
Even more distressing was the fact that his own father too felt the same.
Max couldn't blame them though.
He could only try and amend his misdoings.
Warming up the Haydens wasn't a difficult job but he didn't want to take advantage of their goodness. He could only be thankful that after everything that he had done, they still seemed positive about giving him a second chance.
Upon seeing Max's aunt Katherine and her daughter in-law Lolo stumbling into the mansion with their matching and very painful looking Prada heels, Robert Wilder left to welcome them. He left Albert Hayden under Max's care.
Albert coughed twice and Max frowned with concern. He gestured a passing server into a stop and helped Albert drink some water, it instantly soothed his dry throat.
Now looking at the old man, Max couldn't help but notice how older and weaker he seemed.
Family is such a delicate thing. When one thread of it suffers, somehow, others too gradually follows suit.
"We all know that you two married for all the wrong reasons, Max," Albert Hayden spoke in a very serious tone, eyes trained on the others chattering and laughing among themselves while waiting for the girls to come downstairs. "But that doesn't make your marriage a lie. Do you understand the severity of it?"
Max nodded solemnly. No matter under what circumstances and reasons, at the end of the day, no matter what, they were married and it was the supreme truth.
"I do," Max said with his brows creased. "It took me some time to get there but now I do."
The defined wrinkles around Albert Hayden's eyes drew closer almost as a single line as he looked up at Max for a long moment, his gold rimmed glasses shone under the light of the chandelier. "I can see that you care for her. But she's hurt way too much—" he paused to exhale a small breath. "The road from here on, doubtlessly will be difficult than ever."
"Then I'm willing to bleed my way till the end of this road," Max avowed firmly, unable to suppress the ever present, growing passion inside him. "Until we're both at the same page."
Female voices erupted from the top of the stairs and Max looked up. Forgetting all the others around him, he stared up at the woman who stood as graceful as a fairy from another dimension.
His eyes widened, heart thudded and tongue felt heavy.
Sofia had changed into a lace maxi dress the sleeveless bodice of which perfectly hugged her figure without being much revealing, while the tea rose beige color of the dress complimented her skin tone. Fitted waistline dropped into a long maxi skirt with long lace godets and they teased the ground about her feet. She was bare of any jewelry except for the tiniest pair of earrings. He recalled seeing those gold earrings on occasions many years ago; he found he adored them now just as he used to back then. So much had changed, and yet, all was the same.
Her eyes were also stuck on his, and even from this far he could tell that she was breathing heavy. And then she began coming down, one step after another, the distance between them decreased. She was ushered to stand at the bottom of the stairs, facing him.
He gulped and then became nervous, wary if the people around him were aware of his predicament.
She dazzled under the light, and she bloomed inside his heart.
He realized this was not how he felt for her all those years ago when in school. Because then, all his senses never were focused onto her so thoroughly. The familiarity of her scent, the warmth of her skin, the words in her eyes, the sight of her face, her beating heart, the light of her soul and every single thing that was his Sof—they all captivated him and overwhelmed him. Time and time again. He was drowned into her. It was that simple.
"Falling in love?" Startled, Max turned around to stare at Neil who had just arrived.
"Already did, a long time ago," Max muttered under his breath. "But that's none of your business."
By the raised brows and goofy grin Max knew that Neil had heard just fine.
"And yet it didn't stop you from taking the form of a maniac recently," Neil commented in the same way, muttering under his breath, their conversation well hidden from everyone else around. "Are you sure that it is not a sick obsession instead? Be a little careful, brother..., or someone else might take that pretty wife of yours away from right under your nose the next time you fail her."
The teasing tone irked Max, he couldn't laugh at that. Maybe because of how sensitive he was about how he felt, or how scary the words sounded, or maybe it was because of the memory of Neil's terrible right hook in his eye at the hospital weeks ago. The only reason he digested the punch was because he knew very well that he deserved it completely, otherwise—
"Why don't you find yourself a wife and stop fussing over mine?" Max barked.
Neil just cackled like the male version of a broomstick holding witch and walked towards Sofia. Max watched fuming as he kissed on her both cheeks after wishing her for her birthday. And he felt a little left out when Sofia beamed at Neil.
It was pathetic how much Max wanted all of her attention only aimed towards himself and no other.
Yes, he was pathetic that way. Of course, he was a selfish bast*rd.
And for that reason, and then, for a lot more other ones, that would make her look at him again with those shining eyes, Max walked towards the makeshift stage at the center of the hall where the band he had hired was one second away from beginning their first song. He took the guitar from the lead singer's hands. Standing behind the microphone, he tapped on it a few times. Some people looked his way at that, others who didn't, Sofia one of them, followed soon after he spoke.
"Sof...," he mused. And he said no more.
Sofia stared at him curiously, mouth slightly gaping. Waiting, asking in silence.
He knew he wasn't a great singer. After all, he was a bloody lawyer who donning his black glory argued and manipulated in the courtroom. However, secretively he played guitar, he learnt to sing in his teen years. Insecurity hid his voice well, and with time, like many other dreams of his, his favorite guitar too gained a cleft, his songs withered away.
And so, when he tried the cords after so long, his fingers shook. And when he voiced the words which held the implication of what still could not be said, his tone trembled a little, but that was just for a moment.
I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish, I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope, I'll be your love, be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath, truly madly deeply do
I will be strong, I will be faithful 'cause I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living. A deeper meaning.
Like how he remembered his own emotions of the old days, his voice returned to its mastery. It had all been suppressed inside since a very long while till now.
I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me
And all of it was sipping out, at this very moment, in the form of blinding infinite rays from the thousands and millions and trillions of cracks of an old wooden ceiling, until it became so powerful that it combusted altogether. And with a smile on face and a bitter sweet ache in chest, he let it.
And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry
The tears of joy for all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of
The highest power, in lonely hours, the tears devour you
I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me
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