She lay on the bed, blood seeping beneath her skin, ribs fractured. There would be no doctor, no evidence, and now Mark would be her grovelling lover until he lost his temper all over again. From the outside it was a perfect relationship, yet Y/N hid purple ribs and purple "flowers" that blossomed over her legs. On skin as white as hers it was easier to spot, it was there and she felt the pain with each breath. Their home was a cage for her body and in her trauma her body came to feel like a cage for her soul.

If in life we are defined by the choices we make then he is a monster. Mark knows when Y/N is bleeding for love, when her eyes are moist and it's like an animal showing you its soft underbelly. He can't stop though, he doesn't want to. He push harder, dig deeper and get what he wants. Why should he give in? He's stronger, she's weaker and that's just life baby. She's his and not a man in this world can take her away. She's property. She's got 'love' stamped on her retinas every time she looks his way. So long as he treat her mean, she stays keen.

"I hate you, Daddy!" Eva screamed when he decided to imprison her mother in one room and separating both of them.

"Awe, am I no longer your favorite person, baby?" he sneered before lifting her up. Eva tried to get away from him, but what two years old kid could do anyways? Seeing her failing to do such things, she decided to scream loudly instead.

"Ya! Listen to Daddy, won't you?!" he yelled towards the innocent kid. He won't leave her to scream. It isn't natural and no, he doesn't care what her mother says. You can't 'spoil' a child with love.

She cried even louder, "No! I hate you, Daddy! Daddy hurt Mummy! Daddy hurt Eva too!"

"I did not hurt you, my little girl. Daddy loves you, remember?" he bite his tongue off.

"Put me down, Daddy! I want to see Mummy now!" The scream told of the pain within, confusion. Her skin craved the comfort of mother.

"Mummy is too tired, sweetheart. She needs some rest,"

"You lie to me! Mummy is not tired! She is in pain right now because of you!" The child stands so still, unsure if Mark is friend or foe. Long tangled hair blows about her face, obscuring the layer of grime that is only broken by tear tracks.

"Look, baby. What I did to Mummy is just because I love her so much. You love Mummy too, right? So how about you be a good girl and let Mummy sleep for a while?"

Eva screamed like her body was rebelling against his existence - as if he'd arrived in a world that made no sense at all. Her skin craved cuddles; her mind craved the rocking sensation of being carried by her mother. The outcome was the same as every other time, a shout, then ignored - her training to be an "easy child" had begun.

"I want to see Mr. Candyman!" she demanded.

"Who? Do you want to watch some cartoon, dear?" asked Mark thinking Eva might wanted to watch TV and already forget all those moments before.

Eva pushed his body more, "No, I want to meet Mr. Candyman! He will help Eva to see Mummy and send you to Mr. Police! You're a bad guy, Daddy!"

There was so much hatred in his eyes, so much remorse afterwards. This little girl he raised finally chose the side he hated so much. The time he finally be forgotten have arrived. Eva chose Jungkook more than her father who have raised her since she was born.

Mark hysterically laughed. "Mr. Candyman? You mean Jungkook? That prick, Jeon Jungkook? HA-HA-HA!"

"I would tell Mr. Candyman about you, Daddy! He will report you to the police and... and the police will help Mummy out from your room! You are bad person! I hate you, Daddy!" her small mouth keep shouting to his face.

Nothing make Mark angrier when Eva decided to inform Jungkook about Y/N. He can't let Jungkook know about this pregnancy news and his fiancé's condition. If Jungkook knows that the baby Y/N bring right now is belong to him, he definitely won't let her go unlike the times when Jungkook was in the prison.

"If you tell of our little 'games' they'll take me away, lock me up and make me sad. You love me too much to let that happen, little pumpkin. So I'll tell you what, you keep out little secret and I'll take you to the ice-cream parlour on the weekend. You know I love you, right? And if they lock me up they'll take your Mummy away too, make her real sad. She'll cry every day and night. I know you don't want that. So what'll it be this weekend, chocolate or maple swirl?"

She'd wanted a father. She'd wanted to make Eva proud of her so that he'd 'be' that father. Show her that even so Mark is not her biological father, he was still worth something. Was useful.

That was all she wanted.

You're probably feeling like you know me by now, Y/N, getting a feeling for who I am, what my background might be. But you don't know, not really. I'll tell you things about me later on, things no-one else knows just to show you that I've made mistakes too, that I can get angry, feel vengeful and hate. I'll show you my own darkness. I haven't been "fully awake" since childhood, that's over years of "sleeping," plenty of time to make mistakes, have regrets.

It's a very strange reality when you can't trust yourself. There's no foundation for anything. The faith Mark Tuan might have had in normal things like gravity or logic or love is gone because his mind might not be reading them correctly. You can't possibly know what it means to doubt everything. To walk into a room full of people and pretend that it's empty because you're not actually sure if it is or not.

'I was wrong, Mr. Tuan. There was nothing left in you, no good, no kindness, no love. Only a monster.'

He did remember what Park Chanyeol told him on the other day. Everybody has gone through something that has changed them in a way that they could never go back to the person they once were. So was him.

Unfortunately, he changed much worse. He have loved. He have lost and he have changed.

'You let go of her because of what, Mark. Now tell me?! Because you thought she's pregnant of my child? You can't be too stupid for this! I never slept with her since she left me and you know what she keeps stick with her decision on choosing you no matter how hard I tried to won her heart back. But what you repay her for her loyalty? By torturing her? I shouldn't let her with you anymore, Mark. Now decide yourself what you're gonna do with your unborn child. I'm sure she hated you more by now as much she hated me on what I had done to Eva before,'

In our reasoning's concerning matter of fact, there are all imaginable degrees of assurance, from the highest certainty to the lowest species of moral evidence. A wise man, therefore, proportions his belief to the evidence.

And he has realized that he'd tolerated him this long because of his own self-doubt...

Well, it's true that he has been hurt in his life. Quite a bit. But it's also true that he has loved, and been loved. And that carries a weight of its own. A greater weight, to be honest. There was a long hard time when he kept far from him the remembrance of what he had thrown away when he was quite ignorant of its worth.

The time we spent together was beautiful and fulfilling for me, with you and Eva. I longed to have a family of my own and I was blessed to have experienced that in my short life. Looking back, I can clearly see the amazing power of your love. It kept us together when nothing else could. We shared the most incredible life together. We had a beautiful daughter, an almost unbreakable friendship and a love that was deeper...

A tear cringed off his cheek and stained her writing on the paper. Many people will tell that it is not for a man to cry, but they may not know how is to feel your head empty and only tears will come out to stand up for you. Tears had poured from his eyes without any change in his facial expression. It's pure pain and pure surrender when your soul cries without any fight from your body and that's how he knew he was deeply affected.

I wanted to tell her everything, maybe if I'd been able to, we could have lived differently, maybe I'd be there with you now instead of here. Maybe... if I'd said, 'I'm so afraid of losing something I love that I refuse to love anything,' maybe that would have made the impossible possible. Maybe, but I couldn't do it, I had buried too much too deeply inside me. And here I am, instead of there.

He failed myself, and her too. The regret would come to him in every moments and how he longed to go back and take a different path, but now that was impossible. Too impossible. There was no way back. There was no way to make it right. She won't going back to him again no matter how hard he tried to apologize. The remorse would eat at him every day of his life.

"You should tell her about Jisung's condition," Jungkook said once he sat down beside him outside the ward.

Mark release a sigh and lower his head, staring down at the floor, emptiness.

"I tried," he forced out. "Believe me, I have tried, Jungkook. For thousand times. But it's not that easy to pass Park Chanyeol. He got her in his house."

From aside, Jungkook leaned back before smiling. Not that smug smile he used to have before whenever those two had a fight. Just a pure smile Mark simply couldn't understand.

"I am here doesn't make us in a good term, Mark, neither to support you to get back with her. She is better with Park Chanyeol now, unlike us who already destroy her trust and happiness. This is for Jisung's sake and I promise her to take a good care of her son."

Mark sighed even sadder. That was it. Even Jungkook already gave up on winning Y/N again.

"She cried over you, Jungkook. She cried for you even she's with me. She cried for days." Mark tried to convince Jungkook that it was not a good decision to let her with someone dangerous like Park Chanyeol.

"I know..." Jungkook voiced softly and looking at his side.

Mark has been staring at him, wondering what makes this enemy of his finally stated that he would let go of his lover after years he tried to win after.

"Then why didn't you reach out to her? Why didn't you give the closure she needs?" he asked.

"Because I'm hurting too," Jungkook answered. "Because I'm afraid that if I see her crying in front of me one more time, I'll apologize and beg for her back. But I can't do that." His gaze dropped. "I can't hurt her any more than I already have."

He has seen Jungkook's cry for several times before but this is the moment he finally truly understands his cries and misery. He was the one who should get blame for. He hurt Y/N and Jungkook for so long and this time he was getting hurt for the same reason. Funny story, isn't? What goes around, comes around. He lost everything and he is more afraid he might lost his son for his stupid action.

"I do need her. I really do." Mark begged. This is the first time he ever beg towards Jungkook. He was being so low and desperate but he didn't care anymore. If it's the way Y/N would back to him, he doesn't care what he should sacrifice for.

Jungkook stood up from the bench. "Let her go. Just let her go, Mark. You can't force someone to stay by your side. Not after you broke her heart. Memories were the soul torturer for her now. She couldn't escape them, or hide from them; they were the worst kind of monster. She was scared of what her past held, all the memories that seemed to never escape her. She had experienced pain before. Because of you, Mark. Because of you. Her memories were indeed her worst enemy and the thing that would most likely destroy her. Now you tell me, you wanna go back to her while at the same time you know damn well you are the reason why she suffer so badly!"

Then he left Mark alone swallowing off his words. Mark fell to his knees with the wretched memories swirling around in his head. His eyes, already red and puffy from crying, squeezed shut to push more tears out. He let his head fall down to his knees, and he pulled his legs closer to him. No matter what he did, there was no where he could hide from the thoughts in his head.

Things loved most are thrown aside, trashed from the mind. Sorrow is the new smile in his eye. Tears replace the sunshine. And life is dark, for what seems to be forever.

•

Mark had grieved so many times. With his son apparently sick now and longing for Y/N's presence by his side, he was terribly brokenhearted. Tears began to spill from his helpless eyes onto the every wires around Jisung. Her gaze fell from every lines the life machine would move. In that moment the affection started growing up to his son, that time was only stopped for him, undid him completely. His fingers hold Jisung's small hand, he was smiling, and why shouldn't he? He cast his eyes to God, he needed his love more than ever now. "Dear God, take care of my baby."

The room was beautiful, the flowers fresh, perfumed. There was a view of the mountains and outside the garden was perfection. Mark eased himself into the soft chair while the nurse came checking on Jisung.

"How is he today?" he asked the nurse. It's been a month since Jisung was born and Mark has been worried sick looking on Jisung's condition which no getting any better.

"We are trying to avoid Jisung from having a long-term complication which most likely chronic health issues, Mr. Tuan. His body slowly shown some symptoms we are afraid it might be a risk of sudden infant death syndrome." She explained, making Mark almost caught off his guard and fell to his knees.

"Let's have a little faith for your son. He has been strong since he was born and I know God really wanted to tell us something. I hope you can stay strong too for Jisung." The nurse encouraged him before leaving him with his son in this room.

What kind of father he is, knowing he's the reason his son nearly die and heavily suffering when the truth is he even doesn't deserve to have a parent like him. Mark always wanted to have his own child. But when it does, he just realized he is a type of person couldn't have a family. His disease. His disorder won't allow him to be what he wanted to be. It just couldn't.

The door suddenly open and he noticed there's his PA stood, looking at him before said, "Sir, Park Chanyeol wanted to see you now. He's outside of this room."

Mark frowned. He wondered why would Park Chanyeol came to this hospital just to see him. He thought everything was over between him and that bastard since he already got Y/N with him. He quickly wiped off his tears and straighten his posture. Of course he doesn't want to look bad and messy especially in front of his new enemy.

"Take care of Jisung when I'm not around. Don't let any of Park Chanyeol's people to enter this room!" he instructed his employee, strictly before heading out from the room.

He might seem too weak and helpless right now but it doesn't change what kind of person he always be. Mark Tuan is still the same Mark Tuan. The brave President of Raymond Hotel. He got the skills and he won't let Park Chanyeol turn him down so easily today.

He scoffed off as he reached where Park Chanyeol arrogantly sitting. The guy he hated turned his head to see him. By then he smirked.

"Mr. Mark Tuan." He called out his name, terribly salty. "How have you been doing? How is Jisung right now?"

His jaw rooted, "Thanks to you... I mean your plan. My son did survive."

Park Chanyeol nodded and accept his insult as a compliment. "You could say I am very skillful when it comes on doing the mission. Look, I have won after all. Everyone is safe now."

Mark hated to see smirk on Park Chanyeol's smugly face. It annoyed him very well.

"What do you want from me, to be honest? I thought you already got all what you wanted?" he went asking straightforwardly against Park Chanyeol.

Park Chanyeol stood and walking closer to the glass window. He stared at a mountain for a while with his serious look before turn back at him again.

"Y/N wants his son back and I came for her behalf. Hand Jisung over me and we're done here." Park Chanyeol finally confessed.

Mark shook his head, showing that he won't cooperate with any of Park Chanyeol's plan. "Tell her to come and see him with her own eyes. Jisung is not well and let me tell you one thing, Mr. Park. I am his father by blood and by law."

Park Chanyeol smirked even wider. "By blood? By law? Guess that what it looks like money to you. Haven't they investigate how close you are to kill your own blood? Remember, Mr. Tuan, once Y/N reported you to the police on what you had done to her before, that is the end of you!"

They exchanged glare and by that time, both of them already boiling up with endless anger.

"Does she know?" Mark asked, making Park Chanyeol frowned in disbelief. He continued, "Does Y/N know that she has been living with the one who actually ruining her marriage?"

Mark lets out a small laugh yet terribly annoying. "Mr. Park Chanyeol who would do anything including letting out a rumour of JK Group's money laundering issue, teaming up with supermodel, Jennie Kim and throwing off Jeon Jungkook into the prison just because he fell in love with his wife. The true colour of Park Chanyeol who not everyone got to know about."

Mark exposed the incident engaging between Jeon Jungkook and Y/N a few years before. He might the one who has been helping out to separate both of them but the real master mind of all is the legend President of Park Legacy, Park Chanyeol. Who would expect behind of the kindness Park Chanyeol gave to her, he was the one who actually planning every single evil details.

Reaction on Park Chanyeol's face clearly shown him that he was surprised to realize that Mark would finally know this damn secret.

"Shut your damn mouth! If it isn't me, you wouldn't have Y/N by that time!" Park Chanyeol shouted before clutching his collar. "Remember, Mr. Tuan. Once this reach to her, I wouldn't stay still and you won't always be lucky."