"Just please forgive me, Y/N... I know I was so stupid..."

Here I am lying to you once again and said it's not even my fault. I lied to you that I never sleep with her but I did. I lied to you that she's the one who needs to blame meanwhile I was too coward to admit my sin. I said I was so stupid but here I am standing in front of you feel like a fool. Maybe I am so deathly afraid of losing you because you mean more to me than any other person. I think about it every day and torture myself with what if's. What if I'm not enough for you? What if you will go to Mark who can give you everything that I can't? I'm trying to keep myself together, to keep myself sane through all of this, but there are the moments when I am completely losing my mind.

I look at you, and I just love you, and it terrifies me. It terrifies me what I would do for you. Truth is, I get jealous easily because what's mine is mine. I'm stubborn as hell, I say sorry too much. I act like I don't give a fuck because I care too much. I over analyze the smallest of things and probably come off as a jerk to simply guard what's mine.

It's true that he did all of this because of jealousy. He retired from being a singer and started a new business just because he wanted to be with Y/N... to be near to her and to keep an eye on her from Mark. But guess what? How much he tried to warn Y/N to not get in touch with Mark anymore, still she was stubborn enough to defend her not-so-best-friend. There's so much fight that happened between him and Y/N because of this until he became fed up with her and gone wild. Meeting Jennie was never a coincidence. She never came to him and making a deal. In time he was too heartbroken towards Y/N, Jennie came offering him love. A love he desired the most. A love that he been craving for a long time from Y/N. Whatever he wants from Y/N, Jennie came to fulfill and satisfy his lust. Everything started with it, the whole playboy controversy and his love towards Y/N faded away day by day. He thought maybe he could be happier with Jennie since then but who knows she actually a gold digger that only came for his wealth.

Her eyes flashed with indignance and anger, much like lightning on a pitch black night. He couldn't recognize her anymore, the girl he used to know was gone, and it was all because of him.

I'm sorry if I had caused you pain... I'm sorry if the decisions I made make you suffer... I'm sorry for ever bringing you into my problems. I'm sorry for ever making you cry... I'm sorry for the miserable life you most probably had throughout those months... I'm sorry for ever getting angry at you when it wasn't ever your fault. I'm sorry for everything Y/N...

When he tried to convince Y/N to trust him over and over again, the door was knocked by someone. It must be Kino. He's the one who brave enough to disturb Jungkook anytime even he was in the middle of the argument with his wife. Kino must bring some news from him. Well, that personal assistant's job exactly. He went to the door and opened it. Yeah, he was right. It was really Kino, standing in front of him now. He looked so exhausted and tried to catch his breath. Did he run from downstairs?

"I have bad news for you, Mr. and Mrs. Jeon..."

Bad news? What happened this time? Is Mark really reported him to the police? Or the media come to this house now after Jennie's press conference?

"Bad news? What it is?" he asked. His expression changed.

"Your mother is in the hospital right now, Mr. Jeon," replied Kino.

It was much unexpected for Jungkook. He didn't see this one coming and totally shocked by this news. Kino then handed Jungkook a phone. It was a call from his brother.

"Hyung!... What are you talking about?!... REALLY? I'M ON THE WAY RIGHT NOW!" he quickly hung up the phone and turned back.

"Y/N... We need to go to the hospital now!"

As soon as both of them arrived at the hospital, there was his brother who already waited in front of the ward.

"Hyung, what happened?" he asked, worried sick about his mother.

"She fainted after watching the news about you and Jennie on TV,"

She must really surprised and disappointed when knowing about Jennie been pregnant of his child. He was very sorry to his mom because having a bad son like him. Never making her proud by doing good deeds and only brings sadness.

"How is she now? Is she okay? She is just fine, right? I mean she only fainted, right? What the doctor said oppa?" asked Y/N who became anxious suddenly. Jungkook looked at her who was holding his brother's arm. It makes him thinking something. Did Y/N know anything about his mother?

"The doctor is still treating her inside right now,"

And right after his brother said that to them, the door was opened and a male doctor came out. All of them rushed to the doctor, wanna know how his mother's condition now. Is it stable already?

"How is my mother, doc?" asked Jungkook, anxiously yet so nervous waiting for the doctor's response.

"You are his children, right? I think it's time for all of you to know the truth about your mother. Mrs. Eun Yeong is actually already in stage 4 breast cancer. Stage 4 breast cancer is considered the most advanced stage and has the worst outlook where cancer has spread from the breast to other areas of the body..."

Jungkooks' eyes widen up drastically when he heard what the doctor said. Wh-what? Breast cancer? His mother was actually having cancer? Why she never tell him about it? His whole world like crushing down to earth when knew that his mother is serious sick now.

"She already took radiation therapy and the area of her body that receiving radiation includes her heart, making Mrs. Jeon have an increased risk of heart attack. That's why you found her unconscious, fainted because of a heart attack. The combination of radiation and chemotherapy can further increase her risk of heart damage..."

"So what now, doc? How are we going to save her? I don't want to lose my mom,"

"There's no hope for us anymore because it's already on her final stage and like I said cancer had spread all over the body..."

"

Jungkook rushed entering his mother's ward and found her lying on the bed. And what's making his heart sadder was when his mother even cared to give him a smile. Like nothing had happened to her! His tears fell one by one while running to his mother. He hugged a precious woman in his arms tightly.

"Don't worry, mom... I will find every way just to heal you back... Just please be strong, mom... for me... can you do that?"

His crying was both ferocious and noisy. He blinked briny tears from bloodshot eyes, his thick lashes stuck together in clumps as if he'd been swimming. The tears made wet tracks down his face and dripped from his stubble, wobbling chin. Clear watery snot streaked from his flaring nostrils down his red mottled skin to his open quivering lips. He doesn't want to lose his mother now! Jungkook heard his mother laughed with her raspy voice and followed by coughing. He released his hug and looked at his mother.

"My two sons are already a grown up men and can stand on your own now..." said his mother while holding both of his sons' hands.

"Mom, please don't say that..."

"It's my time now, Jungkook-ah..."

"I don't want you to leave me..."

"Y/N... come here love..." his mother called Y/N who already cried at the corner of the bed. She came and standing beside Jungkook.

"Thank you for fulfilling my wish to marry Jungkook. Please take care of him when I'm not around anymore..."

She then pulled off her hands from Jungkook and touched Y/N's belly.

"Grandma is so sorry, princess. I couldn't welcome you when you come out soon. But I promise to watch you grow from the sky..."

"Don't say things like that, mom..."

"Just let me follow your father now..."

All three of them were crying while tried to convince his mother that everything will be just fine. But it was never expected that that was her last words. She has gone forever now. Jungkook looked at his mother who was silent now. He refused to look away, even as his lips trembled and his shoulders heaved with emotion, unwilling to back down.

His dark lashes brimmed heavy with tears; his hands clenched into shaking fists, in a desperate battle against the grief. A lone tear traced down his cheek, and just like that, the floodgates opened. He wept, tears streaming from his eyes, loud, heaving sobs tearing from his throat, and still, he did not look away. Not until the sobs drove him to his knees did his determined gaze fall.

Mother, you left us beautiful memories. Your love is still our guide, although we cannot see you, you're always at our side. No matter what I do to move on from this pain, deep down inside I will always know that I'll never get to hug my mom again...

Jungkook went outside, he couldn't bear the pain and the fact that his mother now gone. As much as he tried to hold it in, the pain came out like an uproar from his throat in the form of a silent scream. The beads of water started falling down one after another, without a sign of stopping. He hit the wall and tried to scream, but his voice was melted by the sound of the place. The muffled sobs wracked against his chest.

The world turned into a blur, and so did all the sounds. The taste. The smell. Everything was gone. The last painful emotion slammed against him before he lost the feeling of feeling. Everything darkened into nothingness. A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path. Death leaves a heartache that no one can heal, loves of a mother a memory no one can steal.

You never said I'm leaving... You never said goodbye...You were gone before I couldn't prepare for it... And only God knew why, mom... A million times I needed you... A million times I cried... If I could save you... You would never have died, mom... In life, I loved you dearly... In death, I love you still... In my heart, you hold a place... That no one could ever fill... It broke my heart to lose you... But you didn't go alone... For part of me went with you... The day God took you home... Farewell, my dearest mother... You can rest in peace now without worrying about your troubled son anymore...

"Jungkook-ah..." Y/N called him from the back.

"I had lost my mother, Y/N... I had lost a woman that I love so much... The most important woman in my life..."

"She is in a better place now, Jungkook..." Y/N came holding his arm from the back. She tried to calm him down.

"Where am I when she was sick?"

Jungkook felt he was a sinner, a bad son to his mother. He was too busy with his work until he never knows how she was. What she's doing every day...? What happened at the house...?

"Jungkook-ah... There's must be a reason why she didn't want to tell you..."

Jungkook turned to his wife. He sobbed into her chest unceasingly, hands clutching at her jacket. She held him in silence, rocking him slowly as his tears soaked her chest. A tiny lapse lets him pull away, blinking lashes heavy with tears, his howls of misery worsening. The pain must have come in waves, minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses for recovering breaths, before hurling him back into the outstretched arms of his grief.

"I don't want to lose both of you too... I don't want to lose you... And I don't want to lose Eva, Y/N... I only have you two now... Can you please stay by my side...?"

"I won't leave you. Never..."

ⓞ

A couple of hours later...

Jungkook took out his phone and dialed Kino's phone number. There's something he needs to tell his personal assistant. Something important. He can't let his mother's death overtook his emotion and lose rational thinking. This must be settled as soon as possible.

"Have you prepared everything...? Great... Let's start the war now!"

ⓞ

A month later...

It's only left a week before Y/N will give birth to his daughter. And now he tried his best to finish his work as early as he can and take a few days off before her due date. After his mom died a month ago, Y/N agreed to discontinue their marriage agreement and promise to stay with him forever. And since then too, his relationship with her was going well like there's no big fight like they used to argue about.

She's been treating him good and so does he. Both of them are just waiting to welcome a new member of the family now. His precious daughter who will come out in any second from now on. He is still in his office, doing some paperwork. JK Group also just doing pretty fine lately and everyone was in rushes trying to finish their work before his brand new sports car will release soon. While he was still reading the paperwork before he's going to sign this new project, his phone suddenly ringing. It was from home.

"Mr. Jeon! Mrs. Jeon... Mrs. Jeon..."

Jungkook became worried when the maid stuttered, calling his wife name.

"She is about to give birth now... And the bodyguards are sending her to the hospital, Mr. Jeon..."

What? Now already? But the doctor expected her to give birth next week. And now he very regrets to not be at the house right now!

"I'm on the way right now," said him and quickly hung the phone.

he called Kino while grabbing his coat. He needs to be at the hospital as soon as possible. He doesn't want to miss any second of this moment when Y/N delivers the baby soon.

he called him again.

But then suddenly his office door was opened harshly. It was Kino who looked terrified. And there's a few man who in casual attire behind him. Who were them?

"I'm sorry, boss. I already tried to block them..."

"Mr. Jeon Jungkook. You are under arrest for using illegal products to your cars sale. You have right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law," said a cop while showing the warrant.