☁️☁️

after we're done eating our first meal of the day, i went to the living room and sat on the couch. jungkook followed me from behind.

i also brought my favourite novel that i've been reading over and over again.

"would you like me to brew you some tea?" jungkook asked.

"i'm okay." not in the mood for tea.

"what about some fruit?" he asked again.

"mm, i think i'd like that." i said.

a few minutes after, a plate of mixed fruit is placed in front of me.

strawberries, grapes, apples and oranges.

"let me know if you need something else." he said, plopping himself beside me with a tablet on his hand.

"wow..thank you.." i took the fork and started to dig in while reading the book.

if i had known he'd be taking care of me like this, maybe i should've gotten married sooner.

i unintentionally smiled by myself.

"what are you reading that got you smiling like that?" jungkook suddenly asked.

"huh? uh...it's nothing. uh..i just..so what are you doing?" i eventually asked him back, avoiding his question.

i shouldn't tell him about what i've been thinking. it would be so embarrassing.

i looked at him tapping something on the tablet and he said, "my schedule for next week."

i moved closer to him.

"wow..can i see?" i asked.

when i got no response from him, i tried to look at him in the eyes but caught off-guard when he's already watching me weirdly.

i froze.

"i mean, well...it's not because i'm curious or anything. i just thought it might be good if i had an idea of what your schedule is like.." i nervously said while scratching the back of my neck.

did i overstep?

did i disturb his privacy?

why are so busybody, chae?

"isn't it normal to be curious about what your husband is doing? i'm a bit disappointed that you aren't curious." he said, showing his sad face.

"ah, well, t-that's not what i meant! i just thought it might make you uncomfortable if i was too curious.." i flustered.

he suddenly put his hand over my shoulder and pulled me closer, making me a little startle.

he continued to tap something on his tablet, "i'm not uncomfortable at all. so i'd like you to be curious as much as possible, wife."

wife? haha, i'm a blushing mess all over again.

i just looked and listened silently as he explained everything about his work and everything.

"whoa, you schedule is so packed." i said.

"since the wedding was pushed up, a few of the meetings scheduled for this week had to be cancelled. my clever secretary found a way to reschedule and fill up my schedule." he said.

huh? the wedding was pushed up?

i turned to look at him.

"it must be so tiring. but wait a minute." i stopped him.

"hm? what?"

"what do you mean by 'the wedding was pushed up'? did you plan a wedding that i didn't know about?" i asked.

his eyes snapped open.

"did i say 'pushed up'? i meant 'rushed'...yes, i think that's what i said."

"no, you said 'pushed up'. i'm sure of it."

he looked away and said nothing.

but then, he stood up and walked towards the kitchen.

"chae, are you hungry? sit tight. i'll make lunch for us." jungkook said.

"where are you going? we're not done talking yet. did you book a wedding without me knowing?"

i followed him from behind towards the kitchen.

"oh, look, there's chicken in here. do you like chicken, chaeyoung?" he said as he opened the fridge, showing me the chicken.

i clapped my hand, "yes, i do-"

chae, why is it so easy for you to get distracted by a mere food? we're on a hot topic right now and he's trying to change the subject.

"that's not important right now. will you stop changing the subject?!" i glared at him.

he looked away nervously.

"you saw your opportunity when tae-yong spread that rumor, didn't you? were you planning on pushing a wedding through without my consent?" i added.

"did that punk finish his session as a new teacher at your school and move away?" he asked, his back is facing me.

"yes, he moved away and-"

"someone like him should not be a teacher."

"i know. that's why you gave him a bad rev-geez! stop changing the subject, jungkook!"

jungkook stopped from his track and turned to look at me.

"can't you just let it go?" he asked.

"no." definitely a big no.

"yes, i set a wedding date..because i was confident i could convince you. it would also have been easier for your schedule to be adjusted more than mine." he finally said.

i was...speechless?

"why?"

"what?"

"why are you talking about us getting married like it was a foregone conclusion? you've never...not once...struggled over the thought of the two of us getting married?" i asked.

he froze.

i wrestled over it constantly.

could i create a happy family with a man who i've only had scheduled dates with?

could two people who grew up in such different environments be compatible?

it started with questions like that to questions i never would've had if he was just an average man.

they were hard questions and difficult to find answers to. i agonised over them every single day.

if tae-yong hadn't spread those rumors at school, if jungkook hadn't declared that we were seeing each other in the principal's office, i was hesitating and wavering over these countless questions at the time.

but jungkook...he is talking like he never hesitated about getting married to me.

why?

for what reason?

"i arrived at the conclusion that i needed to take responsibility. and that you, park chaeyoung, were a fitting partner to share that responsibility with." jungkook said.

i froze after hearing he said that.

"there's no doubt in my mind that i've come to the correct conclusion. i'm sure of it." he added.

i unconsciously put my hand on my flat belly.

a partner to share responsibility with?

"i see.." of course, it's just because of that.

"are you angry?" jungkook asked, eyeing me carefully.

i looked away, "no. i'm just a bit tired." and went back to the living room.

i feel sad?

maybe i had been hoping for a more romantic answer.

maybe i like him a little.

no, i think i've come to like him a lot more than i thought.

i think i wanted him to give a reason more personal than just someone to share responsibility with.

i thought maybe he felt the same way i did. i guess that was a wishful thinking.

haa..

i plopped myself on the couch again and took the tablet that jungkook had been using.

"would you like me to fry some chicken for you?" he shouted from the kitchen.

"sure. whatever you'd like." i really don't have any mood for food right now.

i tapped something on his tablet and my eyes stopped at his schedule for today.

"jungkook..what is this?" i asked.

"what?" he walked towards the living room and stood in front of me.

"why does it say my name on your schedule for today?"

"ah...it's a reward i'm giving myself for the first time in four months." he said, taking a seat beside me.

"huh?" what is he saying?

"today's schedule...it's the reward i'm giving myself after working nonstop for the past four months." he explained.

what? i still didn't get it.

"yeah, right..how is that a reward? you haven't rested at all today because of me.." i said.

"to be honest, it didn't feel right that we had to push back the honeymoon. so i made sure to clear my schedule today. i really feel like i'm being rewarded right now."

he cleared his schedule at the office just so he can work at home? like that? that's a reward for him?

"are you workaholic? do you feel nervous when you're not working?" i bluntly asked.

he smiled, looking at me sweetly.

"i work a lot. but that doesn't mean i like it. also, it's not that i like to do house work. it's that i like being with you." he said, gently brushing the corner of my lips.

yeah, his action does make me blush a little..but he just said all we were doing is sharing responsibility.

jungkook suddenly put his hand over my shoulder and asked, "did that move you? then can you give me a kiss? hm?"

huh?

he moved closer. we're literally breathing each other at this point.

why does i always act like this when he's being closer to me?

i always don't know what to do or say.

i always let him be.

i let he kissed me.

i feel like i don't know my own feelings anymore.