《Underestimate Me ⇝ anakin skywalker x reader {book 1}》30.
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He shut the door behind him and walked over to me. He sat down next to me.
"Hey, talk to me." He said, pulling me closer. I rolled into his chest. He hardly had to do anything for me to start letting it all out. I began sobbing into him. He didn't say anything, he just sat there and rubbed my back as I held onto him.
This isn't how I should be, weak like this. I hated it. I know from what I've gone through most would be traumatized for life, but I've been trained for this. I've wanted this my whole life. But I never was taught how to deal with so much loss, for when you fail, for when everything seems too difficult for you to keep a balance on your emotions besides meditating. And I've meditated enough and I'm restless because meditating doesn't solve my problems like it does the others, it only makes me contemplate them longer and longer until they consume me.
Until all these little things pile onto my heart and mind till I burst into a million pieces. And now I'm left sitting here. Weighed down by all that I've been struggling to cope with my fears of inadequacy and jealousy of others.
Anakin started whispering sweet nothings in my ear. If I didn't have Anakin, I don't know where I'd be. I laid down in his lap as he rubbed my back. He didn't need to know why I was crying and that's what made this so easy. He just let me cry. I had never had someone be so calming to me. We seem like such an unlikely pair to calm each other but we do.
"It's okay.." He whispered, pulling a strand of hair away from my face.
"But it's not okay." I huffed. I couldn't help but feel like a little kid. That's how I was treated by the council anyway. He shushed me.
"What's wrong? Tell me." He asked me, "Maybe I can help. I don't want you to be sad."
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"Neither do I." I said, lifting my head from his lap and I wiped a tear away, he wiped under the other eye.
"I'm sorry. I don't want you to see me like this." I laughed at myself, trying to take deep breaths.
"Hey, hey, no. It's good for me to see you like this." He smiled at me, "I've fallen in love with you even more. It's incredible. Even when your crying your still the most beautiful girl I've ever known."
"Your so sweet to me. It's just so unfair. Master Windu told me I was trouble. That I was a risk to take on, and he's right. I know that he's right. All I keep doing is failing everything and everyone around me. Maybe I would be better off not apart of the Order. I'd be less trouble to the fleet, Master Windu, you.." I choked over my words, tears threatening to fall again.
"Don't, (Y/N). You know that's not the answer to this." He said, "You just helped destroy a droid warship! You're not trouble, you help."
"I wouldn't have risked your guys' lives doing that if I hadn't made the mistake of coming here. I'm not strong enough to do this both in the force and emotionally. I've needed something more. If I didn't have you, Anakin... I don't know where I'd be." I squeezed his hand.
"(Y/N), you're one of the strongest people I've ever met. You're incredibly strong in the force, that's why, they're scared to teach you, they did the same thing to me. You were able to use the force as a child with no training to hold a boy against a wall. You must be trained to use the force wisely." He squeezed back, "Trust me, I understand wanting to leave the Order. But you can't. For me, this is something we need to do together."
I put my head on his shoulder and we intertwined our hands. I felt our ship jump to hyperspace, we would soon be in Coruscant again.
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"You're the only person I trust now." I muttered.
"The Order is our family." He defended them, I expected that. "In time you'll learn to trust them, too."
Anakin has always had a love for the idea behind the Jedi order. To be selfless and help others, I share this belief. I believe the Jedi are good but theres so much more I feel like they aren't giving me. It was like they wanted me to leave. I never understood why. Why they kept things from me. My Master was the second most powerful Jedi on the council and he held things back from me. I couldn't understand why this would happen.
I looked up at Anakin, he was my shining light. He was everything to me. He never held things back from me. He's understood me more than anyone else. He had his flaws surely, he's not perfect. But to me he is. He fits into me perfectly. He has the courage I don't sometimes, he has the calmness I don't at times, and he's not afraid to argue for what he believes. He believes in helping those who can't help themselves. I put my chin on his shoulder.
"You're going to be okay, I would never let anything bad happen to you." He whispers, keeping the hair away from my face.
"How did I get so lucky to have you in my life?" I smiled at him, I must look like a maniac with my eyes puffy and red, my cheeks stained in tears. Yet still he kissed me. He wasn't grossed out, all he wanted to know was why I was upset and help me. He had matured so much.
"Something else is troubling you?" He narrowed his eyes, releasing his kiss. He stared at me, how could he know something else was the matter with me when I didn't know anything was wrong?
"I-I don't know." I said, my heart beat slowing down finally. "I just wish I didn't have as many fears as I do. I know it's the path to the dark side, I must stay away from them."
"It's normal to have fears, (Y/N). They're normal emotions, like love. The important thing is you know how to not let them consume you. That when the time comes you can concur them." He told me.
"I feel like Ahsoka." I rolled my eyes playfully at his advice.
"I hope not," he chuckled, "I definitely don't kiss Ahsoka when I tell her advice."
"I would hope not." I rose an eyebrow.
"Of course not, my love." He gave me a quick kiss on my nose to assure me.
"Something is bothering me." I admitted, after a moment.
"What is it? You can tell me." He said turning to face me on the floor.
"It's just- how is this going to last?" I asked, "This will be so hard to maintain with all of this war and craziness and what if you are to meet another woman when not with me-"
"That would never happen. No one else is out there for me besides you, I know it." He held both of my hands, "It's indescribable this hold you have on me, even if you are to leave I would still harbor these feelings for you-" he was caught off by the ship shaking. We fell towards the side of the ship.
Immediately I got up and went to the door, not bothering to cover my tear stained cheeks to ask a crew member what was happening.
"Our ship is under attack!" He exclaimed.
"By who?" I asked.
"An unmarked ship! We believe it's pirates!" He said, and ran to the main bridge. I felt like a knife had been twisted deep in my stomach.
This couldn't be happening.
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Travelers [DROPPED]
DROPPED. The story focuses less on dungeon building than on the why of dungeons and how they fit into the universal order. While I am working from a grand plot, the writing is going slice of life style because I need to do that to work out how things progress into that grand plot. The original story seed idea / synopsis is below. The Grand Tapestry protects Rhofhir from Primal Chaos by imposing Order via patterns. However, the patterns grow stiff, stagnant, and so the Tapestry is nearing a time of Unraveling. Evidence of past civilizations wiped out during previous Unravelings foreshadow the apocalyptic catastrophe looming over the world. The mages of the Arcane Asylum reach out across dimensions, searching for some way to prevent, or at least stall, the coming Unraveling. Among the many voices they find is a gifted graduate student researching machine-assisted telepathy -- and his gaming group. Lena never expected that the chance to play DnD with telepathy would result in her becoming an actual Dungeon Master, nor that her friends could become the bosses of her dungeon. This is, in many ways, her dream come true, but there's a catch: What happened to Brad, the creator of that telepathy machine?
8 98A Sorcerer's Footsteps
The mind maggots have hatched. Their little honey-coated silver tongues whispered sweet, sweet lovelies into their fleshy hosts. Only whispers though, only ever whispers and nothing more... To utter a single syllable just the tiniest bit too loud would surely frenzy their new homes, stopping them from performing their cattle-like tasks. Only one remained unnoticed by the charismatic boat flies that swarmed the lands, unseen by the eye's of nobles and peasants alike. An arcane apprentice, who mere months away from graduating to a fully-fledged magician of the empire. Without any idea as to why he was spared from the telepathic tongues of swarm, or even how they even came to be, he marches on. Forced to wander a world alone. Armed with nothing but a few spells, a gnawing feeling of hopelessness, and bushel of apples.
8 169Tor zur Tiefe [German]
Dies ist die Geschichte von Maya, Loras und Dragon. Dies ist die Geschichte der Insel Nurando. Dies ist die Geschichte des tiefsten Dungeons.
8 154Child of Fate
The story of when the darkness slowly started to devour the land. Human dying, Animals turned into monsters, and the land lose it ability. When the darkness slowly covering the world, the light would shine and seal the darkness away. Follow the journey of three heroes who have to do this heroic mission, to seal the Darkness. However, their journey is not smooth as they expected. Story of romance, comedy, and trust. They are only a human, where their heart also can be contaminated by the darkness of their desire. When the road to their goal is harsh can they still able to maintain their trust of each other when they have their own problem and ego? Their target was a thousand year monster which sealed by the previous hero, but it also have experience far exceed them. Is the story would repeated with them manage to seal the Darkness or they was the one failing? ______________________________________________________________Guys, this is my new novel project. I planned for oneshot, but somehow it ended in (very) long story... I want to know your opinion and comment, and is it good for me to update it all or make it into parts? Thanks.
8 264A Wish Fulfilled
The die is cast and omnipotent beings bow to the result. The world holds still in anticipation of a new actor. A man shall be ripped from his safe reality and cast upon new tapestry, familiar yet alien. His body will be reforged in flames of adversity. His mind, challenged, by crashing waves of doubt. And his soul will dance, to the amusement of those who observe. “Welcome, castaway, to the new world. Partake in its bounties and revel in its beauty, but be mindful of dangers. Your will is unbound and trials aplenty. The wish carried you here and you will define yourself anew. Live, as you see fit. Now, that the contract is fulfilled, it’s time. We shall not meet again, nor will you remember me. Farewell.” A falling star lights the skies and the die continues to roll. [participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge]
8 119A Road To Felicity (Complete)
Mehmel khan, a girl abandoned by her parents craves love but each time she gets disappointed until someone enters her life and gave her all the love which was snatched away from her.All Rights Reserved.
8 96