The car ride back to the apartment was almost as bad as the beating that was to come.

The entire time, Zach was silent. He didn't speak a word, look in my direction, or even breathe too loudly.

He was calm as it seemed.

Too calm.

I knew what was coming and he knew that I was waiting for him to snap, to yell or hit me. Yet, he also was conniving enough to know that the longer he held out, the worse the terror overrunning my mind would become.

We arrived at the apartment.

He still said nothing.

We got out of the car and went into the apartment.

Seconds turned into minutes as I stood uncomfortably in the corner of our living room, watching Zach as he paced around casually, kicking off his shoes and loosening his tie.

He still said nothing; did nothing.

What's he waiting for?

Each and every minute that passed by, I became more and more frantic. My hands were trembling, my stomach was rolling in agonizing circles, the terror induced butterflies ramming around painfully.

I knew it was coming and I just wished that he would get it over with.

It was like a bad review that you were getting from your boss. You know you're in trouble. You know you've messed up somehow, someway and you are about to scolded for it, possibly reprimanded. But the worst part of the entire review process, is the waiting in the chair outside the boss's office.

Fidgeting, overthinking, sweating with nerves.

And that's precisely how I felt as I fell into Zach's waiting game trap. I needed him to say something, to break, to scream, show some sort of emotion other than composed; indifferent.

Anger and hate were far better and preferable to indifference because at least they were something; at least I would have some signal as to how he was feeling or what he planned on doing.

This way?

I hadn't any inkling and all I could do was wait and ultimately be caught off guard whenever Zach did decide to strike.

I hated waiting.

My eyes were trained on Zach's figure as he walked around the room, stopping every so often to answer a message on his phone, never even sparing me a glance.

He's playing with me.

I was watching him like a predator even though I knew that, without a doubt, I would be the unsuspecting prey tonight.

A wide eyed, naive deer waiting in the forest for the lion to move away and go back to his den. Unfortunately, this deer and this lion shared the same den and all the deer could do was be ready for whenever the lion would go in for the kill.

My body jumped and fear shot through my veins when I heard a loud noise come from Zach's direction. A gasp slipped past my lips and my eyes tore over to where he stood, anxious to see what the noise was and if now was the time I had been waiting for.

It wasn't.

Zach had simply dropped his phone onto the counter, the solid phone hitting the granite of the counter top hard enough to make the jarring noise.

A jarring noise that Zach made on purpose as his eyes met mine the second I looked over.

He was toying with me, his eyes swimming with too many vile emotions for me to keep track of.

"Whoops," he said, referring to the loud bang. His sapphire stare didn't reflect his words though. They were dark, menacing, and devious. Yet, the one thing in his stare that forced a sliver of sheer dread through my mind wasn't the cruelty I could see so vividly in his stare.

It was the joy.

He was getting pleasure out of my torture. He enjoyed messing with me, playing with my emotions and my fears.

He was in total control of the situation and of me.

And that's exactly how he liked it.

"Um, I'm gonna go wash my face, if that's okay," I mumbled out, my eyes falling from his maddening ones and dropping to the floor, unable to hold his wild gaze any longer without my mind falling apart at the seams.

"That's fine," Zach replied in a light tone, trying to portray some resemblance of kindness in his words. But what threw his act off entirely, was when he lifted his pink lips up and gave me a smile.

His pearl colored teeth were on full display, his grin fully blown out over his face. Yet, even as the smile could pass for genuine, the swirling vexation embedded in his stare told a very different, very disturbing story entirely.

Without so much as a nod, I scurried away into the bedroom, flew past our shared bed in the middle of the room, threw myself into the bathroom, and locked the door.

Pressing my back up against the door, my chest was heaving rapidly, and I could feel the tension in my throat as the knowing horror of what would soon happen to me took over my mind.

Hot tears spilled from my eyes and a sob choked in my throat as I released every bit of pitiful sorrow that was overrunning my mind. It was useless to cry but I didn't care. I sunk to the floor, crying as hard as I would allow.

My butt hit the cool tile of the bathroom floor and I released all of my weight, sitting down on the floor and drew my legs up into myself. I let my head drop into my knees and cradled my arms around my legs, hugging them to me as sob after helpless sob broke past my lips.

"Please..." I whispered to no one in particular.

I didn't know what I was even asking for, or who I was asking it from, but I couldn't stop the pleas as they stole from my lips.

"Please make it stop," I cried, my words cracked and weak as my despair took over, clouding my mind with gloom as I knew that there was no way out of this.

I had to take the beating. I had to go out there and wait for him to punch me, kick me, strangle me.

Because this was my life and Zach was my only option.

"I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this," I cried pathetically into my knees, rocking myself back and forth on the floor as I dwelled in the unjust reality of my situation.

"Please make it go away," I choked in a whimper, pressing my palms against my eyes, willing the tears and torment to stop.

I just needed it all to stop.

"Babe, you okay?"

Panic sliced through my mind as Zach's voice flooded the bathroom from the other side of the door.

I clamped my hand over my mouth, my fingers gripping onto my lips tightly to keep in the gasps and cries that so desperately wanted to be released.

"Mhm," I mumbled out in a muffle through my fingers, praying that he wouldn't try and come in here.

"Okay, just make it quick. I've gotta pee," he called to me through the door.

Then he was gone. My head dropped back into the door, knocking against it. My lips quivered as my eyes skimmed over the inside of Zach and I's bathroom.

Salty tears continued to fall down my cheeks in heavy drops.

This was it.

"Shit," I cried in a strangled whisper, knowing that my time was up.

"Oh my god, please don't make me do this," I muttered pleadingly into the dead air of the bathroom, knowing it was useless as the words spilled from my mouth, pitiful as always.

My entire body was shaking uncontrollably. My head was trembling, shaking so hard with fright that it was hard to focus on any one thing in the bright, white bathroom.

But I had to get it together.

So that's what I did. I ran my hands roughly over my reddened cheeks, wiping any reminiscence of the tears that my fear had caused. I stood up, having to grab onto the sink for leverage as my legs wobbled underneath me, the uncontrollable fear taking away my balance for a second.

Once I got myself righted, I pushed my shoulders back, sucked in a deep breath through my nose, and composed myself.

Even if I was a manic wreck on the inside, I would walk out there with my head held high, and take my punishment whenever it came with whatever crumbs of dignity I had left.

I pulled the handle of the bathroom door and walked out.

Only to be yanked right back by a hand that shot out and gripped onto my hair.

A cry of shock and pain ripped past my lips as I stumbled backwards and into a toned chest. The hand that was in my hair intertwined its fingers even deeper on my head, getting a better grip as the hand snapped my head back abruptly.

A scream tore through my throat as my neck wailed in pain as it was forcefully snapped backwards and my scalp burned with the intensity of the pull on my hair.

My head wad tugged back onto Zach's shoulder as he wrapped his other arm fully around my waist, holding my body against his with no way out.

"You like making me look like a fucking joke?" Zach growled out in my ear.

"No," I sobbed, more tears soaking my skin and slipping down the side of my face.

"Don't lie to me, Lee."

A desperate gasp ripped from my throat as Zach's body suddenly was gone from behind me and I found myself flying backwards.

My head crashed into the wall behind us, my back connecting painfully into the hard mass as a small whimper escaped through my lips.

Panic invaded every surface of my scrambling mind as I felt Zach's entire body press up against my front. There was no escape, no room for movement as I was trapped between the wall and Zach's shaking, powerful body.

This was it.

"I saw you, Lee," Zach said in a smooth, deadly voice. His furious face came within inches of mine, his deep blue eyes raging with fury and lips turned up into a disgusted snarl.

"I fucking saw you with him!" he screamed in my face as I felt his strong hands clamp around my upper arms in a mighty grip.

"You were gonna let him kiss you... weren't you?"

Zachs question struck my mind with severity that I wasn't even sure how to deal with as I didn't know the answer myself.

Was I?

"Answer me!"

"No!" I denied it even though I wasn't sure if it was a lie at the moment or not.

Abruptly, I felt my arms get tugged on roughly and my body pulled lower as Zach sent a powerful knee right up into my abdomen.

"Ugh!" My body hunched over into itself as the pain rolled through my stomach. My chest heaved in short, sporadic breaths as the air was suddenly knocked right out of me.

Alarm swarmed my mind like rabid bees as my lungs burned and my throat tightened and choked as it gasped for air.

"I said don't lie to me, bitch!"

A rasped scream ripped throat my dry throat as Zach hauled my quivering body upwards. My stomach clenched in agony and my mind began to swim with guilt

"You wanted him to kiss you, didn't you? You wanna fuck him?!" Zach yelled in my face, spit spewing out from his hate filled words and scattering across my face.

"No...no, please," I cried as my head lulled to the side, overwhelmed by his absurd questions.

Zach's hot hand came up and squeezed around my chin, bringing his burning eyes directly in front of mine.

"You guys were this. Fucking. Close," Zach spat at me, his words clipped and accusing.

"Anyone could have seen you, which makes it look like I don't know how to keep a fucking leash on my own girlfriend!"

"I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"Didn't what, Leah? Huh? Didn't what? Expect to get caught?" Zach's voice was filled with mockery and arrogance as his lips lifted into a gruesome sneer.

"We both know you're too fucking stupid for that."

Zach's hand tightened around my chin as he moved my face to the side forcefully. His lips found my ear and brushed against the soft skin, sending a shiver of disgust through my body.

"And if you happen to not get caught, do you know what he would do with you?" Zach asked, his voice barely above a whisper as he let his lips roam over the side of my neck and the back up to my ear, his hot breath warming the skin he came in contact with.

"He would fuck you."

His words startled me, causing my eyes to widen as Zach's other hand slipped up the smooth material of my dress. His actions were slow and calculated as I felt the warmth of his hand through my dress travel up the flat surface of my stomach.

"He would fuck you... over and over again," Zach whispered in my ear almost seductively, causing confusion to stew within my mind.

A strangled gasp slipped through my lips as Zach's adventurous hand suddenly gripped onto one of my breasts.

"And you would let him because that's the kind of whore you are," Zach growled our vengefully in my ear as his hand squeezed at my breast as hard as he possible could.

My yelp of pain echoed through our bedroom and my breast cried out in agony, desperation clouding my mind as I pushed my hands against Zach's, trying to stop his assault on my chest.

"And then you know what he would do, Lee?" Zach asked in a rush of words, his voice rising, getting louder as his anger began to pool over once again.

"He would leave you. He would leave you because he would realize that that's all you are! A fucking stupid, worthless, whore with no other purpose in life than to be a good fuck!"

His anger finally boiled over as he released his torturous grip on my breast and threw me to the ground.

I fell in a heap onto the floor, my hands coming out to save my fall before my face could meet the hard, unforgiving ground.

Yet, before I had time to revel in the relief of my newly freed, aching breast, Zach sent a powerful kick directly into my stomach.

A pathetic wisp of air pushed past my lips as the force of his kick jarred my insides, causing pain to slice through my body.

"Say it, Leah. Say it!" Zach screamed and I felt his shoe dig deep into my side once again as he kicked me with as much force as he could manage.

A cry intermingled with a groan fell from my lips as I cradled my body into myself as my stomach muscles churned and wailed in unimaginable pain. My mind was overrun with guilt, horror, agony and all I wanted to do was lay in that ball on the floor and let sleep take me away from this awful reality.

I wept silently as Zach continued to scream over my beaten body.

"Say it, Leah. Say you're a stupid whore!"

Just make it end. I just want it to be over...

"No!" I wailed in protest and panic as Zach's fingers tore into my arms as he lifted my body effortlessly up from the floor and onto my knees.

I flinched as I briefly met his gaze, which was storming with raw, uncontrollable rage that filled my mind and heart with so much angst and terror I felt like passing out on the spot.

But Zach wouldn't allow that.

"Say it right fucking now, Leah or I swear!"

"I'm a whore!" I yelled out, my voice filled with shame as an insurmountable amount of tears rolled down my flushed cheeks, drenching my neck in the process.

"What else?!"

"I'm stupid...and worthless." The words rang truer and truer as Zach drilled them into my brain, making sure I would never forget the pathetic quality of my life.

I winched as Zach gripped onto my chin once more, bringing his crazed face directly up to my whimpering, drenched one.

"And I own you. I'm the only one who will ever put up with your shit. That fuck face wouldn't give you the time of day if he knew how useless you really are."

His eyes bored into mine with a wrath and intensity like no others as he spoke his next words, branding the words into my mind.

"I'm it for you, Leah. No one else wants you."

No one else wants you...

And with that, he tossed me back onto the floor like the trash I was.

I was left a sobbing mess, overwhelmed by his words and by my actions with Kaleb.

I am a whore...

I wanted him to kiss me. I wanted him to press his lips against mine and hold me like he had held that other woman.

And that made me a whore.

I stayed where I was on the floor, my tears forming a puddle on the hardwood floor as I cried and reveled in my shame. My stomach was burning in pain, my breast was sore, and I knew I would have bruises littering my arms and maybe even on my chin.

But the worst pain was the one shooting off in the pit of my chest. My heart ached, and my chest heaved as I realized that Zach was right.

Nobody else would ever want such a miserable, pitiful excuse of a woman for more than anything but sex.

Especially someone as seemingly flawless as Kaleb.

I listened carefully as Zach's shoes stalked to the other side of the room, preparing to leave. Yet, just as he made it to the other side, I heard the thud of his shoes stop.

"If I ever catch you with that fucker again, Kaleb or whatever the hell his name was, you're out of that shit show of yours, got it?"

"Got it," I mumbled into my arm.

"Good. If he ever lays another finger on you, I'll fucking kill him and I'll do so gladly. Remember that, Leah."

He left that threat hanging in the air as I heard him walk out of the room finally, closing the door behind him with a resolute bang.