no text or calls, nothing. nothing from him since that day. nothing except for that album. he didn't return my call after the voicemail i sent. the only person i'd kept contact with was jae. even then, we never talked about yugyeom. he knew to leave that part of my life untouched.

untouched, filled with memories that were surreal and happy, yet worrisome all at once. the days that i had spent with yugyeom were worth a lifetime.

i was at work one day, making calls, dealing with customers and sponsorships and budget expansions. i got a call through the work phone. i answered it the way i usually would.

"primitive clothing, head of finances speaking, how can i help you?"

"kanpo?"

i sat up straight, startled that whoever was on the line knew my name. "yes?"

"it's jackson... jackson wang. listen, can i meet you for lunch?"

"uh... sure."

we worked out the details and i hung up. i was nervous and worried, what did jackson have to discuss that was so important. could it have been about yugyeom? did something happen?

-

"how are promotions going?" i said as i sipped my tea.

"good." jackson said stiffly.

i nodded awkwardly. we stayed quiet for a long moment. the silence killed me, and i was itching to leave already.

had it been that long since we'd talked normally?

"just to cut to the chase, i'm gonna be honest kanpo."

i gestured for jackson to keep talking.

"yugyeom isn't well, he fractured something in his ankle, and he thinks it's the end of the world. he's so dramatic he thinks he won't be able to dance again but we both know him, he's gonna be able to. moral of the story, he's been slummed and he's kinda depressed so i was wondering if you could come with me to visit him."

Jackson said this all in one quick breath, he gave me a longing look. a look that begged me with everything within him to please go see yugyeom.

i hesitated, "jackson, it's been great seeing you, but if i saw yugyeom i don't know how i'd be able to handle it."

"kanpo please, just give him a few minutes. just some of your time, he's not well. he talks about you all the time. just go see him for a bit."

i shook my head, "i think i should go." i got up to leave, taking out a few bills from my wallet.

"kanpo, just please, consider it." he slipped a small paper into my hand. i stared at the paper for a moment, the name of the hospital and a room number.

"bye jackson." i waved and walked out of the cafe.

i went back to work, my mind clouded with the possibility of seeing yugyeom again. i wasn't sure if i was even mentally prepared to see him again. he didn't even bother calling back, so why would i worry about him? clearly i wasn't anything important to him if he hadn't even bothered to say anything back.

it's been two years, two damn years and nothing. nothing from him. i hate him.

no i don't, i just hate that he didn't call back.

why didn't he call back?

how dare he not call back?

-

i gently pressed the elevator button. i stared at the arrow that pointed upwards light up and blink momentarily. thoughts swirled my mind.

the elevator doors opened and i stepped in, pressing the floor button quickly before i could i change my mind. i felt the pulley move and waited patiently to get to the floor. soon enough the doors opened and i stepped out, looking to the right and then walking down the hall.

i made my way to what was supposed to be yugyeom's room. i knocked on the door, and waited for a response.

"come in." a groggy voice said.

i took a deep breath, before gripping the door knob, and pushing the door open.

i softly closed the door behind me before stepping into yugyeom's view.

"hey buddy."

"buddy?" yugyeom tried to suppress a smile. he tried to keep the corners of his mouth from turning upwards.

"yeah." we stared at each other, i finally let myself smile as i admired him. his skin was a little oily, and his neck was sheen with sweat. his hair was messy and stuck to his forehead.

i walked closer and set down the bag i'd brought with me and helped him sit up. i sat on the side and pushed his hair back.

"how long has it been since you showered?" i asked, patting his neck with a nearby towel.

"three days." he said sighing as he looked at me.

i frowned, "come on," i stood and helped him get up.

"what are you doing." he said as he sat himself upright.

"i'm gonna help you shower." i replied, letting him lean into me as we walked towards the bathroom.

"kanpo, i can take care of myself." he said as he limped with me.

"and yet, it took me coming here for you to shower." i replied helping him sit on the closed toilet seat.

"i don't want you to see my bits." he said as i hiked up his shirt.

"well it's nothing i haven't seen before right?" i smiled lightly, meeting his eyes.

i tugged on his shirt, gesturing for him to lift his arms. he was reluctant, but did so nonetheless. he helped me hook it over his head and eventually i threw it on the floor.

right away, i noticed how thin he looked, i could see his ribs and his collarbones were more prominent than i'd ever seen them.

"god don't they give you food in this hospital, gyeom?" i half jokingly said.

"doesn't mean i eat though," he chuckled bitterly.

i sighed and tilted his head to look at me.

"you can't keep doing this to yourself. i know it's been hard, not dancing and everything, but i only ask you for one thing. please yugyeom, when i leave take care of yourself."

"when you leave?" yugyeom scoffed as he took my hand away from his face.

"yes, when i leave, i just came to see how you were doing." i said.

gyeom's expression turned cold, "i thought you came to get back with me?"

"yugyeom, i came because jackson insisted you weren't doing well. clearly you aren't. i can't always be there to fix your broken pieces."

"kanpo, when we broke up, i felt like a part of me was broken. god as hopeless as it sounds, i wasn't in the right state of mind. i had no other escape other than dancing and when my damn ankle gave up on me i had no distractions to help me cope."

"what are you trying to say gyeom? i'm not your savior, i can't be your reason to keep going." i said, frustrated, yet touched.

"kanpo, you're my missing last piece." he was nearly in tears. god, i could kiss him.

actually, yeah, i think i will kiss him.

i grabbed yugyeoms face and gave him a long kiss on the mouth. he kissed me back passionately before pulling away.

he sighed softly, "stay with me okay?"

"okay," i kissed his nose, "how about that shower gyeomie?"

_____

this is the end, this is what i am GIVING YOU AS OF RIGHT NOW. i have been putting this off, but i think u guys deserve this LMAO. thanks so much for the support, as much as i hate this story, i'm glad y'all liked it. i'll be writing more in the future on here, and probably with BETTER plot that's more figured out.

thanks again, leave me requests if u have any :)

-gg