❦ SESSIONS ❦ WITH ❦ GUNS❦

|Hide and seek|

❦❦

I don't know what I can say or answer to these questions, I'm not even sure if they were even directed at me at all. I think he was asking himself but they were about me. His arms are still around me but I don't mind them, in fact I like it when he holds me and I like what his touch does to me. It brings this warmth to me and it does make me feel strange inside but I like it, this warmth I want it and I want him to continue to touch me for some reason.

The world doesn't want me to know so much but there is one thing that it has revealed to me and it is only now that I'm starting to realize that I'm falling for him and I don't know how or why and it makes me feel ashamed that I'm falling for a man that kills people and is so cruel but he has never truly been that mean to me. He has held me at gun point but he has never shot me or hurt me. Even now he's so gentle with me.

I close my eyes as I find myself hugging him and I wrap my arms around his torso and like he holds me I hold him. This may seem a bit strange but the feeling I have inside me doesn't tell me otherwise. It's amazing feeling that I have inside and it makes my heart beat faster within my chest. I can still hear his heartbeat and anyone that says that he doesn't have a heart just has to listen closer because he does and it is beating fast, letting him know that he's alive and that he does have feelings.

Then all of a sudden he throws me away from him until I land harshly at the wall and he walks out of the room and I fall down to the ground because of the force that he used with a small yelp coming from my throat. He slams the door and locks the door before I can hear his footsteps descent down the hallway and I'm left here alone with pain in my back and confusion in my mind and a gun on the floor which he had forgotten or not wanted to pick up and take.

My eyes catch the gun and I'm unsure of what I should do with it. Everything in me tells me to pick it up and throw it away in the trash so it can never kill anyone again but if I pick it up my fingerprints are on it. I could always use something else to pick it up. I stand up and groan as my back is sending waves of pain but it is slowly... slowly fading away and I believe it will leave a bruise but nothing more which will fade away in a couple of days anyway.

I stand up and walk to the bathroom where I take a towel and walk back into the room and with the towel over my hand I pick the gun up. It's much heavier than I had remembered to to be but then my next problem arrives to me. I have no clue where to put the gun where no one will find it. If I throw it in the trash then Silas will know he will take it back and I've not prevented any more death. I need somewhere to hide this gun until I can find some time to get rid of it, for good.

My eyes scan the room, looking and searching for a place to put it and fast. I don't enjoy that much holding the gun and I don't like how heavy it is, actually makes me wonder how he carries this heavy gun every single day. Wait... does he sleep with it? That would probably be rather uncomfortable to wear when you're asleep but I think it would actually b rather funny to see him trying to sleep with the gun. And how does he make sure not to shoot himself in his sleep? I have so many questions about it but I'm sure he would rather not want to answer those questions.

Then I see the perfect hiding place for this gun. The door to the library. There are so many hiding places, even so many that it's hard to find the door, in fact I've not even found it but I will find it, soon that is. I open the door and look around to make sure that he isn't there before I turn a corner where I hide the gun. It is behind a couple of books in the lowest row near the wall. The books cover the gun and the towel so that it can't be seen.

It's actually a good hiding place. Walking back to the bedroom and thankful that there isn't anything waiting for me when I enter which is surprising but the way that he was, I'm sure that he isn't going to come here for some time now and I take the book of the table and sit on the bed. Making myself comfortable on the bed and under the covers, I open the book and start reading it and when I'm a couple of pages in, it's getting interesting.

❦

Closing the book after I've finished it, I head for the library and put this book back where it was before I look over at other books. I only spent a couple of hours reading it and no one (and when I say no one I mean Silas) entered the room and I'm not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing but he hasn't come but food hasn't either and as the hours pass I'm getting a bit hungry as all I've eaten today are waffles and everything that I had with them but that isn't that much and it's a lot of sugar too.

Looking around the library until I find a book. "I don't recommend that one, it has some naughty parts which I'm sure would make you squeamish" Silas speaks. I had seen him in the library but I chose to ignore him completely. He hurt me when I thought that he would never hurt me. My back is still hurting and when I thought the pain was going away, it wasn't and that makes it even worse because I wanted it to go away. I act as if I had no heard him and take the book from the shelf.

I know that this is wrong at ignoring him and hurting his feelings but he hurt me and he should learn his lesson that his action do have consequences that he needs to face and nothing will get better unless he does. He chuckles as I hear him follow me. "You took something that belongs to me. I would like it back" He speaks but I ignore him. I knew that he would be wanting to get it back. I'm not sure if he was in the library looking for the gun or not but I know that he isn't going to find it.

Even if he does, he would have to look for a long time before he has found and even then I'm not sure if he would be able to. It's impossible to see the gun from the hiding place that it's in. The books make sure that it's hidden from sight. I ignore him and go back into the room but before I could close the door, he forces himself into the room and stand sin front of me. The look on his face is an angry one and I know that he wants the gun back and he will do whatever it takes to get it back.

"Where is it?" He asks, trying to be calm but he's losing the fight. I gulp at him but I shake my head despite how I'm a bit afraid of him. "You won't kill anyone else with it" I tell him, kindly telling him that he will not be getting that gun. I won't allow him to hurt anyone else. He has hurt and killed so many people and I won't allow him to do it anymore, even if it means that he will hurt me.

"So she speaks" He says as he chuckles but it is so dark that I don't even know if the sound even came from him at all. I gulp as I back away from him. He walks as I back and it isn't until I have reached the bed that I fall down on it. I crawl on the bed until I've reached the pillows which is by the wall. He on his fours goes on the bed and with a wicked grin stalks towards me and I can see the wild and evil look in his eyes.

I'm lying down on the bed and he goes almost on top of me. He stares down at me as he takes the book from my hands and throws it aside. His knees are on either side of outer thighs and his hands have grabbed mine and holds them tightly on either side of my head. I look up at his twisted look and deep into his kohl black eyes. There is something there that I'm not sure what is but I feel like I want to find out. His eyes are pulling me closer to him for some reason.

They drag me like if I were a sailor and he were a siren that lures me in but not with a song but with his eyes that continue to drag me like never before. For a moment Silas and I just stare at each other and look into each other's eyes until he lets out a chuckle. "I'm only going to ask this once and if I don't get an answer, you're not going to like the outcome. Where is the gun?" He asks me and I gulp and let out a breath that I did not know I have been holding in.

I give him a glare. "If I give it to you, you're going to hurt people and I'm not going to allow that to happen" I tell him but he just smirks at me. "Did you think that was my only gun?" He asks me and cruelly laughs. His laugh is so evil that I'm not even sure if I have ever heard a laugh like that form anyone but him, I did hear it when he had laughed in my office once in the prison but I had forgotten about it until now.

I pale when he says that this isn't his only gun and I freeze. It doesn't matter that I have this gun at all, he has others and he will hurt people with them but why does he want this one when he does have others? It doesn't make any sense. Why go through all that trouble when he has other guns to use? I don't get it. I don't answer him and I don't know if that is because of the fear inside me of him or because I simply can't speak at the moment.

He's still holding me so I can barely move and as he is like this I can feel the warm grows hotter inside me and I'm not sure what is happening to me but I can tell that I do like this and I don't want it to end. Is that a bad thing? I don't know but I get the feeling that I'm about to find out in a couple of moments. He raises an eyebrow at me. "Nothing? Clearly you're not as obedient as I had thought you were" He says but his grip only tightens on my hands as he grows angrier.

He's angry but the wild look on his face is a strange one. I can feel it inside me that he's going to do something to me, something that is going to hurt so much. "We'll just have to fix that, won't be" He speaks and before I could even react his lips have found mine and he kisses me. Deeply and roughly but there is somehow gentleness in it like never before. I'm stunned but I close my eyes in the kiss that I somehow find myself enjoying without knowing why but I'm far too lost to worry about that. Lost in the moment and lost in him.

His scent welcomes me and I can smell his cologne that just fills me up and I love that smell. He bites down hard on my lower lip and I gasp and he takes that change to shoot his tongue in to explore every inch of my mouth. Dominating my tongue and trying to fight with it. He kisses me deeply and well and despite it being rough I can feel how the love is shining through it. He breaks the kiss but he's not done as he opens his eyes and smirks at me.

The smirk sends shivers running up and down my whole body as he starts to kiss down my neck until he finds a spot where I let out a moan and as soon as the sound has escaped past my lips my eyes widen at it. I can't believe that I moaned at that, I can't believe that I did that. This is so wrong. I have a fiancée and I should not be doing this but why do I feel like I love this and why does this feel so good?

He continues to kiss my neck and lick and it feels so good. My body wants him to be closer to me but he holds me tighter as he does this and I let out another moan. Why? Why do I this? What is this man doing to me? I think the answer is rather simple yet so complicated at the same time to the point where I'm not even sure what the answer truly is since I don't understand it at all. I'm starting to lose sense of everything around me and just about reality and everything in the world as he kisses my neck.

Then he lifts his head up but the smirk remains on his face as he gets off me and releases my hands and gets of the bed. He winks at me before he has walked out of the room, which is unlocked. Wasn't it locked before? I lie there and stare at the ceiling in confusion. Unsure of what had just taken place here yet at the same time I know exactly what happened and what he did to me. I can't help but picture Silas back here and holding me and feeling his touch everywhere eon my body. Just thinking about it makes me hot.