❦ SESSIONS ❦ WITH ❦ GUNS❦

|Where is the door?|

❦❦

Waking up with the shining sun through the window as I try to convince myself that what happened last night was only a dream, that the way that he kissed me was something that my mind came up with to trick me and mock me for my confusion but as my fingers touch my lips I can feel his lips on mine still. Even now a couple of hours later I can still feel his soft lips and he tasted of mint. He kissed me but I found myself kissing back as if that doesn't make me feel horrible but I also had a gun pointed at my head while he kissed me.

It was not until that he had broken the kiss and walked out of there like nothing had taken place and as if he had regretted it that he removed the gun and he had slammed the door and locked it behind him. Leaving me standing there in pure confusion and I had just gone to bed and closed my eyes. Yet even when I was asleep he still lingered in my mind and now when I'm awake I can still feel as if he were here with me.

This is wrong and I know it. I know that it is wrong to be kissing him but I could not help it. He makes me feel things that I don't understand but I want to and I want to know what he does to me. He does things to me that are unlike any other and I feel horrible what I'm doing to Adam and I wish I were in his arms right now but I don't have a choice. Sighing I sit up and look outside the window. The sun is so bright that I need to keep my eyes half open to be able to see.

And even then I can't see fully outside. It's clear that the sun is rising from that direction. Looking at the clock to see that it's only eight in the morning which is actually a good time to wake up. I stand up and stretch my body, though that bed made sure that I slept so comfortable and I'm not even sure if I ever want to sleep anywhere else ever again because this bed is everything and it brought me to sleep so fast and it was just amazing.

Walking to the window I watch the world and the ocean that is still there and I smile to it as I see the small waves crash against the sand and I wish I was there and I wish I was in that water. Feeling it touch me. It would feel amazing to be out there and smell the heavily ocean smell which I've come to enjoy. I'm not sure how long I've stood here but then I walk to the bathroom, which I found out where it was yesterday to brush my teeth.

Doing my business there I go back to the main room itself and there I realize that I don't have any clothes. I slept in those that I wore yesterday because I was too tired to look for some clothes. There are a couple of more doors to this room, which I'm not even sure what are but if there is ever a good time to see what is behind them, it's now. I walk to the first door that is not the bathroom door and not the door out of the room and twist the handle a little.

Surprising the door does open and I gasp when I see where it leads to. A library. A larger library than I've ever seen in my entire life. Even a larger one than my school had and that one was pretty big. Hundreds upon hundreds of books are in every book case around and I walk to the closest one and some of these books are in other languages while most of them are in English and about everything. There is every genre here and every category that there can be. This is the mist amazing library that I've ever seen in my entire life.

Though, I've not seen that many libraries in my life but still. I look everywhere in awe at how high these book cases are and how large this library is and I wonder why it is near the bedroom but I'm not going to dwell much on the question. I see that in one case there are the books that I studied and read about humans and their behaviors. I take a deep breath and just let all of this sink into my brain and I'm somehow convinced that this must be a dream.

It is odd how this mansion and this place keeps getting better and better with each and every second of the day and yes there was death which I don't wish to think about now and I'm trying to forget the kiss that Silas gave me because I already have a fiancée and I don't want to do this him, he doesn't deserve any of this and I wish I could tell him how sorry I was and how sorry I am because I did enjoy that kiss and I feel horrible about it but that is enough about that, as I don't want that kiss to ruin my good mood nor Silas.

"I see you've found my library" A voice speaks and I jump up from being startled and just when I was thinking about him, he shows up. I look down in shame as I feel the blush rise to my cheeks as I remember the kiss. Even when I just scolded myself to try and forget it but having him be close to me, it's hard to get it out of my mind right now. My cheeks are burning and my heart is pounding as he walks closer to me.

When I finally look up to meet his gaze his face is hardened and I gulp when I see him. "Yes" I answer and he chuckles in amuse at me and I can tell it's because of the nervousness that is forming inside me as I shiver under his gaze. "Did you enjoy my kiss?" He asks smirking and my jaw drops open but then I close it. "We shouldn't have done that, you shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have done that. I have a fiancée. Do you not care about that?" I ask him, with my anger slowly rising.

I don't know why but I feel like slapping him but that is so bad and I don't want to hurt him. He chuckles as he walks around me like a predator stalking his prey before it strikes. "A kiss as meaningless as that..." He scoffs and I feel my heart fell down. "Some say the animal tastes better if they're exited" He whispers into my ears which sends shivers running up and down my whole body but I don't even know what he's trying to tell me. He then walks in front of me and stands there.

"I've already told you, that fiancée of yours is not the man you believe him to be" He tells me and I give him a confused look (even when that face has been on the entire time) but the anger is starting to show in my eyes and he can see it. "Why do you keep saying that? He's the best fiancée in the world and there is nothing that you can say against it" I tell him and then before I do something that I know I will regret I turn back around and walk back into the bedroom.

Leaving this beautiful library and I close the door. There wasn't a key so I could not lock it but I did hope that he would not come inside the room. I don't want to speak to him anymore. Not when he says things like that. Adam is the best and I honestly don't really deserve him as he has been so kind to me and he must be so worried about me that it's unreal. I sit down on the bed, having no energy for some reason to look for clothes which was my original plan all along.

Silas' word still echo in my head and I wonder if that kiss meant nothing to him. While I know it was wrong, I can't help but feel like it meant something to me and I actually liked it which is why I dislike it so much because I actually found myself liking that kiss and I don't like it that I enjoyed it. I have a fiancée and he's the only one that I should be kissing and not someone else, no matter who that is. But, why do I feel this pull towards Silas and feel things that I've never felt before, not even with Adam?

Sitting there and just thinking for I don't know how long but my stomach pulls me over to the door that leads out the room and I see that it is still locked. Is he going to keep me here forever? Because I do need to eat and he did give me last night and I wonder if he will give me something to eat now. It takes me a couple of minutes of trying to open the door by pulling at and trying at least to get out but it's not working.

So, I head to the library and go inside. If he was there it can only mean that he had come from somewhere and that somewhere can lead me to the hallways and perhaps to someone that can point me to the kitchen so that I could eat something. Anything. I can even make it myself but I just want to eat something so I walk into the library. It's empty but there are a lot of places that he could be hiding in, if he's even here at all but I don't see him so I continue to walk around the library.

Thinking that I will have to look around later and now I need to find away to get out of it and to the kitchen. I walk with the walls but then I find myself back where I had begun. At the door that I came through which I had left open so that I would easily be able to walk back into the room. Confused I scan the library where to see if I had missed the door but I notice that there is not other door in here. How did Silas even get in here?

I don't understand this at all but I get the feeling that he doesn't want me to understand because it seems when I'm getting closer to the answers, he pushes another riddle to me which is even harder than the next and I end up back where I started and that is rather annoying. Sighing I head for the bedroom once again and close the door but as soon as I'm in the room, I notice that the door is open. The door that leads to the hallways is wide open. How long as it been open exactly?

It was locked. That I am sure of. I heard it lock last night and I did try to open it and it did not. It was locked but now it's open. I think that Silas is doing this on purpose and it's not making any of this better. I head into the hallways and then the next problem comes up to me. Finding the kitchen or finding anyone that can help me find the kitchen. I start walking the hallways. My heart speeding up in my chest as I remember what had happened the last time I walked these hallways.

"You're going the wrong way" Silas' voice rings through the hallway and I gasp when I turn around to be met his chest. I wonder how long he has been behind me, but also how he was able to walk so quietly that I was not even able to hear him or perhaps I did but paid no mind to it. "And what way is it?" I ask him trying to push down the anger that is rising through me. He should pay for what he did to me and how he confuses me like this, it's far too much for me to handle.

His hands go on both my shoulders and makes me turn in the right direction and I look up at him. "Thank you but I think I can handle it now" I tell him. Honestly I just want him to leave me alone. He keeps hurting me and I don't like it and he keeps on confusing me and that confusion is something that I don't like feeling and it's not something that I would like. "If you go alone you're going to get lost. Like little red riding hood" He whispers into my ear and I turn to face him.

Ignoring the shivers that have run down my spine because of his voice I open my mouth. "I don't suppose you're going to be the big bad wolf? Did you not say that you would eat me before?" I ask him with a raised eyebrow and that only makes him smirk at me as he pushes me in that direction and I start walking. "Oh... I'm much worse than the big bad wolf" He tells me and I gulp at that. But I know that is true, he is worse since he has killed so many people.

"How do you even know where I want to go?" I ask him. Perhaps he's leading me somewhere where I'm not going because I'm trying to find the kitchen. He chuckles. "There are only two reasons why you would want to get out of the room. The ocean and food and I'm guessing you're going to start with the latter and then move on to the other one. It took less than a second to figure out that you had not eaten anything and you're hungry. Perhaps I should be the therapist since I notice your behavior. Is that not what you do?" He asks me.

He's mocking me. That I can tell and he's enjoying it. Silas truly does enjoy it when he's making fun of me and when he's mocking me and making a fool out of me but I'm not going to allow him to do that to me. "You could be but then you'd have to actually understand my behavior. It is one thing at noticing it but its another understanding the reason for it and knowing why I do the things that I do which I'm sure you're lacking" I tell him and this time it's my turn to smirk at him as his face remains in shock.