❦ SESSIONS ❦ WITH ❦ GUNS❦

|Strange noises|

❦❦

Thursday. The day that I thought would take forever to arrive has arrived and I find myself unsure of what is going to take place today. Silas is going to do something today but I've no idea what. He did give me another note which had my name on it but nothing more. As if he was trying to remind me of something but I've no clue on what he's talking about. Adam drives me to work and as I enter the prison I feel my heart start to speed up as I'm looking everywhere.

Whatever is going to happen, I know for a fact that it can't be a good thing. Silas isn't the type that would just do something nice for someone, at least he isn't now but he will be. Soon enough he will be good. It will take some time but we'll get there. Smiling as I greet some guards and some who greet me. The people that I see every day and walk past every single day. I go to my office where I close the door and start preparing for the day but I have this feeling that I just can't shake off. A feeling that I don't even understand.

Though Silas and his strange things that are going to happen today will just have to wait, I have two sessions before he comes in for a session and one of them is the warden but he is my second session for the day. I take the folder for my first patient of the day and take out some empty papers. She's going to be a hard one as they all are but soon they will be better and they will feel much better than they did.

While I wait I lift up my sleeve to see that the bruises are still there and as ugly as ever. I don't like them very much but soon I won't have to look at them as they will fade away and soon become nothing but I don't think I can say the same about the memories of what happened. As a therapist I should be able to use the technique that I use on my patients when they don't want to be haunted by memories but it's rather hard to be the patient and a doctor at the same time.

Being broken out of my thoughts when the door opens and guards as well as my patient walk inside, she with her usual glare at me but that doesn't matter, I know she doesn't mean anything by it. She just doesn't like guards or anyone for that matter. She had a rough past but once you get to know her, she's actually kind of nice or can be when she wants to. I notice Kaden is one of the guards and he winks at me when he walks past me but doesn't say anything as he along the other one leave my office and I begin my session.

❦

"I'm glad you could make it" I say to the warden as he sits down in the chair. It was kind of soon to take him now since he said that he might be a bit late but he's only about ten minutes too late. Though, that is all right. "I've never truly gone to a therapist before. Sounds silly when I think about it" He says but I smile and shake my head. "Not at all. Some people are afraid to ask for help but need the small push in the right direction" I tell him.

It is the truth and I think that is the case with him. He just need my help to find who he is but once he has found it, he can be the person that he is. "You've already told me a hard chapter of your past, now you just have to accept it. As scary as that sound, accepting the past is a part of healing and only then can you move on" I tell him. The first session in my opinion is the one that they are often confused at how this works.

As I don't work as most therapists do, this is new for them. "You can speak of anything here, it's a safe place. No matter how ugly you believe it to be, no one will judge you, least of all me" I tell him with a soft reassuring smile on my face. The warden does look nervous to be here, though he does try to hide it from me but it's not going that well. "My past has always been a chain hanging from me, holding me stuck to the ground when I want to move forward" He begins.

"Go on" I say to him kindly as I write down what he says but I also put a question mark as it seems that he has done well with his life. He is a warden even when he was in the wrong crowd once so he was able to turn his life around and move forward from the past but I wonder if he is talking about emotionally. If he has let anyone in since that horrible thing happened to him. "Every time I see a baby, my heart feels heavy and each time I witness a marriage I'm reminded of it. I can't seem to forget any of it" He then tells me.

I nod my head. Understanding what is going on. "It is your fear. After it happened your body became alert of anything. Wanting to make sure you are alive. Some would call it survivors instinct. Your body fearing to let anything or anyone close to you in fright they might be taken away and to keep your body from suffering such a loss. But, the good news is. This can get better, you can get better and I am going to help you" I tell him with a soft smile on my face.

He nods at my words as they are sinking into his brain. It is sort of strange to have a session with someone that isn't a prisoner but I suppose that does also help me in the part where he wants to be here as most of the prisoners don't like being in therapy and can't even wait until the session is over. The warden wants to be here and he wants to get help and he wants to be become the better version of himself. "You are correct" He tells me and I smile sweetly at him.

"This is what I do and you do pay me for doing my job" I joke and he laughs at that and I join in to. I also enjoy that I can joke around with and it isn't as serious as it is with the prisoners and most of them don't enjoy that much jokes or laughing for that matter. Like Silas, he once told me that he doesn't like to see me smile but it's hard not to smile as smiling is sort of my personality. "And I hired the very best" He tells me.

I continue the session, talking to the warden and allowing him to speak of things that he has found rather hard to speak about in his life. I realize that he truly needed someone to speak to about these things as the fear has kept him from speaking for so long but not anymore. He's on the right path to become one with himself. And the session actually went well but as the time passed I notice that we've gone a bit into Silas' session but only three minutes. "I think this has been a good session, I will see you tomorrow, I imagine?" I ask him and he nods.

He stands up and as he was about to walk to the door but he turns to look at me. "The world is a cruel place, that I know but you are a rose amongst the thorns and you bloom bright. Keep hold to that kindness" He tells me as he then walks out of the office. Leaving me a bit confused at his words but all I can do is just do what he says. I smile to myself as I head for the desk to put the folder back.

As I was about to walk over to my chair with Silas' folder I hear a noise outside my office door. Furrowing my eyebrows I turn to the door but when I don't see anything but I do still hear that noise which I can't be sure what is. My office is soundproof from the inside at least so no sound can make it outside, I think but I can hear some of the sounds that are outside the door. Not all but some and judging by that sound it's loud. Like a pop or something but I have not a clue what that is.

Going to the door I look through the window but I don't see anything, which is rather odd since there are always guard outside the door to my office. They are there in case that something would happen like when I was attacked. They were there within five seconds but why aren't there any guards now. As I was about to open the door someone opens it for me and a man enters inside my office. A guard I notice. "Stay here, Dr. Russell. Don't leave the office and lock the door when I'm gone" He tells me and before I could even say anything he leaves my office.

I do what he had told me to do and I lock the door when the door closes. I have no clue what is going on but it's best that I trust the guard as they are the ones that are protecting this place and one should always listen to them. I sit down on my brown leather chair in confusion. Guessing that with this thing that is going down and I think something is that Silas isn't going to come to the session today. Then again it's already been twenty minutes of his session.

I think back to what Silas was talking about, how there is something going to take place today. I wonder if this is what he was talking about and meaning. I can't help but think about this whole thing. Somehow I thought it would be bigger, then again I have no idea what is happening outside the door and I still hear those sounds. Only things time the noise is much more frequent now than it was before but I can't be sure what it is as I've never heard anything like this before.

Or I don't think I've ever heard anything like this before. But since I can't be sure what they are inside my office as it is soundproof, mostly now it seems since I can hear that noise. It must be loud since I can hear it even in my office. I go over to my desk and sit down by it in the chair and then I open my computer. I send an email to the warden, asking him what is going on and what is happening since I've been told to stay in my office and not go outside.

Waiting a couple of minutes but I don't get an answer for it so I check the news websites to see if they know anything but there is nothing on the prison and I doubt they would know if anything were to happen since the journalists and paparazzi are forbidden to come into the prison for some reason, I never really understood that but then again it doesn't have anything to do with me and I don't really care much about it. I don't even know why I even went to a news website in the first place.

Perhaps I am just desperate to know what is going on out there as I can feel it that it is all my fault. I knew that something were going to happen today but I did not warn anyone and I don't even know why I did n0t speak about it to anyone else. Maybe it was because there was a part of me that believed that nothing could happen and that Silas was only trying to mess with me but on the other hand there was also another part of me that always knew that something was going to take place.

Sitting there feeling restless and useless, though there is very little that I can do out there. I don't like weapons and I could never hurt another human being nor any being for that matter, not even the nature. It would only hurt me and I can't do that, I can't allow that kind of guilt to be inside me. It would destroy me from the inside out, until there would be nothing left of me. I'm just overthinking this now that I have this time that I have nothing to do in my office.

Normally I would be in session with Silas right about now but he isn't here and I do have a bad feeling at wherever he is and I want to know what he's up to. I want to know what his plan has been and what is happening. I pick up my phone and call Adam. "Hey, I've just been thinking about you" He says to me in the phone. I feel the blush rise to my cheeks when he says that. "Any reason for this call, except for missing me of course? But, aren't you supposed to be in a session now?" He asks me.

Adam knows my schedule so he knows when I'm free to call him or anything like that. "Well, yes I am supposed to but I think something is happening in the prison. I've been told to be in my office with the door locked. I don't know what is happening but I think it's something big and dangerous" I say to him. Speaking to him does calm me down and I feel much better now that I'm not alone, well I am alone but hearing his voice makes me feel like he's here with me.

"I'm coming, just stay in your office. If something is going on, I'm sure they'll handle it and once it's over I'm going to be outside, waiting for you" He tells me and I smile sweetly as I can only wait to be in his arms once again and have him take me home where we will be safe and sound, together. I open my mouth to speak to him and respond but the door handle of begins to rattle and in the window I can see Silas' face. "Adam, I have to go now" I say as I hang up the phone and I feel myself compelled to go to the door, to Silas.