"RAPH!"

My throat is sore from screaming out his name repeatedly. He ducked Shredder's blade but was punched harshly to the ground. A loud shriek made me realize that he's been stabbed but I can't find his wound. Shredder also tossed him against the concrete wall of the building and a sick crack was all I heard. Suddenly all the sound around me is blocked as I run to Raph.

"Don't you leave me," I cry out with tears streaming down my face. He holds my hand tightly. His eyes are barely open but he's breathing fast.

"Leo. Leo it hurts," he yelps. He moans in pain.

I follow to where he's holding his leg with his other hand and remove it. A long open cut is revealed and I cover my mouth to avoid any throwing up. I use his hand to cover it up again.

"Its okay baby. You're going to be fine," I croak out. The amount of blood pouring from his leg is incredible and it takes every ounce in me not to run away.

Relax Leo, relax. Ugh! I shouldn't be dealing with this! What am I suppose to do?

"Donnie! A little help here?" I shriek.

"A little busy fighting our enemy!" Donnie howls.

Oh right.

I grab my katanas and let out a cry as I run to Shredder. Out of the corner of my eye, Karai is holding Raph.

"Where is Hamato Yoshi?" Shredder booms as he dodges my attack. I land on my feet, my eyes getting blury from my own tears.

"Mikey! Egg!" I demand. Its a coward move. I can hear Raph scolding me about doing this, but he's wounded and we can't take him down with one of us hurt.

I can't take him down without him.

We all run to Raph. Karai begins to panic, stepping away from us, but I grab her arm and pull her against me.

Mikey fumbles through his gear and with a shaky hand, throws the egg.

"Donnie let me see him please," I plead.

"No not yet," he says in a firm tone.

"What do you mean not yet? Is he okay?" I frantically ask.

"He's fine. His wound is just really deep and I think he might have broken some bones when Shredder tossed him against the wall," he says and scratches the back of his head.

"What the hell? You think? What do you mean you think Donnie? I need an answer right now!" I argue. I know I'm pressuring him but I can't seem to calm down. I'm shaking with fear and I haven't been able to take proper breaths since then.

To my surprise, Mikey tries to calm me down by hugging me. I quickly hug him back, my eyes bursting into tears. I just want my Raphie back.

What if he dies? Just like the freaking book?! What if I turn out like Hazel Grace? No no no no.

"Its okay bro. Raph will be fine. He's a strong dude," Mikey soothes me.

"T-Thanks Mikey," I sniffle.

"We all need to remain calm," Master Splinter says. "Its all we can do right now. April will be over with some more medicine."

"He was so fast. Its like he was everywhere," Donnie mutters. "We can't defeat Shredder Sensei."

"No you can't. But a little more training and a stronger team, you can do anything," he responds.

They continue their conversation but I'm no longer interested. I go to my room and lay on my bed. Underneath my pillow, I unfold the letter Raph had written for me on the night we shared passion.

Sorry baby. I had to go before Sensei caught me. Last night was absolutely wonderful! Big day today!

He can't die. He won't. All I want is another night with him, another one with us tangled underneath the sheets. One where I can finally wake up with him in front of me.

But I fall asleep with the absence of dark green arms around my waist.