"Okay when I was pregnant with Minochi I threw up once."

Sasuke sat back down in the chair and hunched over with clasped hands.

"That happened only a few maybe one week after I left, and it wasn't vomit." Naruto glanced over at Sasuke to see him shake his head and look down.

"Please listen. I went through hell when I was pregnant. There was no morning sickness after that just cramps and pointless nausea. 24 hour cramps that got worst and worst with each passing day. I couldn't eat or sleep sometimes and I...It got so bad I actually thought about getting an abortion...but I didn't. I was already too far along and I figured if it killed me oh well at least I tried you know." He pleaded with his voice for Sasuke to understand that he was going to need him to get through this, but the raven remained focused on one thing.

"Why didn't you get help?"

"I did...they gave me pain killers and sent me on my way. At first they didn't believe me...They refused to do an ultrasound till I actually went into labor six months earlier than expected. They all looked so disgusted...except for this one nurse. She actually cried and congratulated me. Anyway they cut me up and got our son out."

"That's all very sad and stuff but why are you pregnant now Naruto? That's the question here."

"I don't know..."

"You are such a lia-"

"I don't know!! I'm trying to go over my pregnancy with you so we can figure this out together!"

Sasuke rubbed his temple and waved his hand for the blonde to continue.

"I was given after pills with the conception pills so maybe he got them mixed up? That could explain the acceleration of my pregnancy.... I only had to take two every year since he was born though. That's all nine of them too so there's no more." Naruto thought back hard to make sure he didn't take them out of sequence.

"Its really hard to believe that you've never noticed you've been taking the wrong pills for how long now? I can't even humor you on that shit. Just tell me who you were fucking up there?!"

"I wasn't fucking anyone!! I told you Minochi came six months earlier than normal! Six out of nine! Can you count asshole?! The only thing that doesn't make any sense is why I threw up twice in such a short period of time. It took at most a week after sex last time before I puked and I only puked once then. Do you hear anything that I'm saying?!"

Sasuke slumped back in his seat and shook his head with a fleeting unconvinced chuckle.

"Nope, I sort of stopped listening when you told me you weren't screwing anyone because everything else you've said makes no damn sense to me."

"...I haven't thrown up since two months ago Sasuke. That was right after I had sex with you." Naruto emphasized each word to the raven.

"But I thought that you said that it takes a week after sex before you puke?" Sasuke gestured to the right sarcastically.

"That's what I thought."

"So...they are Gaara's kids."

"No they're not Gaa-Wait what?"

"Twins. You and that damn red-head are having twins. Oh and they're boys so Congrats! Lee's going to be so happy don't you think?" Sasuke got up and grabbed his coat aggressively while Naruto sat there dumbfounded.

"You know I think I finally understand why you came back." He mused and placed a finger to his chin.

Naruto looked up at the raven still a little shell-shocked that he was pregnant with twins.

"Child support right? Because you're struggling? I should have picked up on that when Minochi acted like he never had a decent meal in his life. What I don't understand is why you had to drag Gaara down? I would have gladly paid, but now I see you're clearly just a whore. So I will be taking custody of our son for his safety and wellbeing. I'll let you and Gaara handle your thing."

The blonde barely listened to the raven's rant because it was all wrong as always. He did hear that part about their son and that gave him an idea.

"Sasuke if I have these babies and they turn out to be yours what will you do?"

"Not possible."

"What will you do?" He asked again anyway with eyes downcast at his stomach.

Sasuke thought about it and rolled his shoulders with his careless response of, "Ha, I'll marry you."

Naruto blinked and grinned a little before resting back on the pillows that had been propped up.

"Orange, blue and red will be the wedding colors. You'll wear an all bright ass orange suit with matching shoes while I will wear a lovely blue and white one just to mix it up. You will also buy me and Minochi anything that we want to be at the wedding." The blonde said as he crossed his arms over his stomach.

Sasuke chuckled and rolled his eyes as if that would happen. He headed towards the door without responding while he slipped on his jacket.

"Do we have a deal Uchiha? Or are you afraid that I'm not the dirty whore you think I am?"

Sasuke stopped and turned around half smirking.

"Fin-"

"Wait!"

"What now?"

"I want it in writing."

The raven rolled his eyes again and reached in his pocket to pull out a notepad and pen. With a click of the pen he scribbled down the agreement and terms.

"One more thing Sasuke."

"What?"

"If they are yours and something happens to me to where I can't take care of them anymore you have to take full custody that includes Minochi. No giving them up for adoption because you can't handle it. "

"You act like I'm going to have you killed." Sasuke chuckled and wrote it down anyway.

Naruto didn't smile or laugh at the matter.

"Just write it down Uchiha and let me see it."

Sasuke added a dash mark under his signature before walking over and showing the blonde.

"Here."

Naruto took it and read it over twice.

"So you want custody of Minochi without visitation rights for me?"

"Yup."

"Alright." The blonde smirked and signed it happily.

"I'll take this as evidence and have my lawyer make a documental copy." Naruto ripped the note off the pad and folded it up neatly.

Sasuke shrugged and prepared to leave by putting the pad and pen away.

"They're not mine anyway so fill free to have him make an actual contract and send it to me personally."

"Will do, will do. You may leave now. Oh and since we live in a wonderful town where you go to jail for failing to go through with a contract you can't pay your way out."

"You're willing to go to jail?" Sasuke asked as he shoved his hands in his pocket, not seeing the bigger picture.

"I won't be going anywhere close to that. It's just an 'If' so don't be scared. " Naruto cooed with a wicked smile on his lips before it turned into a snarl.

"Now leave."

"Gladly." The raven left the room slamming the door behind him.

Naruto sat there for a few minutes until he broke down crying again. This time he sucked it up though and controlled himself for the sake of the babies. That man had already made him stress more than necessary. He placed a hand over his swollen abdomen and made little circles.

"Daddy has no idea what he's in for does he?"

In that spare time he had he guessed the twins were the reason he threw up twice. Twice the trouble? He chuckled and continued to talk to the little duo in his stomach for a while till Tsunade came in caring a troubled look and clipboard.

"Hey grandma what's up?"

"I see you're perky as ever."

"It comes with the pregnancy." Naruto smiled to the woman only to not receive one back.

She pulled up a seat to the blonde's bed without dropping the clipboard in her hand.

"I saw Sasuke leave in his pissed mood."

"Yeah that's him every day when he's not having sex. Hey I need you to call my lawyer when you have time."

"Why?" Tsunade asked as she watched the blonde fluff up the pillows more.

"Legal stuff kind of, so what's my status?"

"You can't have these babies Naruto."

"I know."

Tsunade hadn't expected that to be his reaction. She went ahead to be blunt with the problem to show how grave this was and he just completely blew it off.

"Anything else?" Naruto grinned and relaxed on the fluffed pillows.

"You...you can't have them. You understand what I'm saying?"

"I know I'll die but I'm fine with that now. " Naruto threw in a bored sigh at the end.

"Dare I ask why?"

"Because I never put myself before others and I won't start now. " Naruto held on to the paper with pep in his voice. He was prepared to accept his fate since he knew that Sasuke would never change towards him, but maybe he'd change towards their kids once he realizes his fatal mistake. The little fight in him he had had also been ripped out of him as well.

"What about Minochi?! Who's going to take care of him or the two you're going to ha-"

"All taken care of!" Naruto waved the note at eye level with a proud glint of mischief in his cerulean orbs.

"My children will be set for life."

"Naruto you never cease to amaze me."

The blonde winked at the woman before tossing the paper to her.

"If you knew you were going to die why make some of these requests? Do you really want Sasuke raising your children? Are you sure they are even his anyway?" Tsunade asked dramatically after she'd opened the note and read over it.

"Hey I can dream can't I? But no those were just to distract him. He may not be that smart when it comes to a relationship but he's learning to be a better father and he's not that bad now actually. He's just a horrible lover, plus I could barely work when I had Minochi. Imagine how I'd be with twins? Sasuke will be stricter with them and keep them safe and fed as well as manage his job. He's very good at multi-tasking. They'll have a bigger roof over their heads and hopefully a better future than what I could have offered them. And they are his kids because he's the only one. You of all people know that." Naruto looked up at the ceiling and bit back a snivel for a sec.

"Alright but a child will need love more than any of those things Naruto you know that. What if they grow up spiteful and spoiled?"

"Ha-ha they won't. I'm still part of them."

"What if that's not enough when living with Sasuke? Look at what he's done to you for crying out loud."

"Please just take that to my lawyer. I'm having these babies Tsunade, not just for their sake either."

Authors Note: (If it seems confusing at some parts that's good! I don't want anything to be too obvious just yet. If it isn't confusing then dammit. lol)