"Mother, what a surprise"

She barged her way into my trailer on set in an all white pants suit and her face covered with a giant ass fedora and designer glasses.

"Is this is what your career has come to?"

"I'm sorry?" I asked, this was the biggest role of my career and somehow my mother found a way to find something negative about it.

"I have to hear around Hollywood that my daughter is playing a drug lord and having to be around actual thugs"

I shook my head, she would die right here if I told her I was carrying one of the "thugs" baby or that I was one of those thugs.

"So I'm confused are you coming to congratulate me or here to express your disgust?"

"Look how they have you working" She wiped her fingers across the counter rubbing her fingers together like it was dusty.

"Only you see a problem with a luxury trailer"

"I've raised you better"

I laughed shaking my head, I plopped down on the couch knowing this was going to be a long day.

"You raised me? From my memory it was the countless nannies raising me"

"Don't start that sob story how I wasn't around, I was working to give you a good life"

Another laugh escaped my lips, my mother was delusional.

"Working? Is that what you called scamming old men out of their money when you already had money that you took from dad?"

" Those old men kept you in designer"

" I didn't need those type of things I just wanted you around giving me the love and attention I begged for"

My mother folded her arms over her newly purchased implants.

"I didn't abuse you or put you in harms way you came out pretty okay outside of wanting to live in the ghetto"

"All I asked from you was to be my mother and to show you care just a little about me, I need you now"

I needed her support more than anything with this pregnancy, it was nice getting Sammie and Miss Angelique's support but I needed my own mother.

" Honey please you are grown I've done my job"

"Then why are you here? Why do you insist on putting your nose in my business if I'm so grown?" I raised my eyebrow.

" Because I have an image to uphold and I don't need you messing it up with whatever this is you are doing"

" Is your image really more important than me?" My voice strained, my mother removed her shades so I can see her eyes.

" Equally important Erin"

My heart would have broken right then and there but sadly she had already shattered years ago and now I was immune to her carelessness towards to me, her only child.

" I appreciate your concern for yourself but I'm doing this role so if that's all you came by for you can leave"

" I don't understand how the director asked for you to put on pounds instead of slimming down, Queen Pin was thin"

Her comments on my weight didn't bother me because my body was in the process of something so amazing to me, I was literally creating a human in my womb and no one could take my excitement away.

" My weight has nothing to do with the role, grandma" I rubbed my small bump smirking.

" You aren't that crazy"

My mother laughed in my face but I kept my hand rested on my stomach.

" Crazy no? Pregnant? yup"

" Just throwing away your life to rebel against me like some little teenager"

" News flash mother everything doesn't revolve around you" I stood up going to the door of the trailer pushing it open forcefully.

" You have that baby your life will be ruined trust me I know"

I folded my arms letting her walk out past me, I couldn't wait for my dad to hear about this.

" You are going to regret this"

" Mother you know what I won't regret?" I didn't give her a chance to reply, slamming the door shut in her face.

: Filming is beginning meet us on set.

I huffed out, my mom had fucked up my concentration with her surprise visit, I had less than five minutes to get my shit together or I could kiss my role goodbye.

" Alright Erin today we are focusing on the scene introducing Jemeker's family background, so the part of the script with her mother"

Oh great, I chewed the inside of my jaw. All eyes were on me because it was just me and a fellow actress filming.

"We want you guys to just come off the top of your head in this scene just to get a more real feeling, John sat back in his director's chair.

"Vanessa, Erin just remember what we studied it doesn't have to be perfect we want gritty"

We nodded taking our spots on the scene inside of a kitchen that they had built.

"Quiet on the scene and action" John shouted out.

"You were out late again" Vanessa wiped down the counter with a wash clothe.

"I was working-

"You call being with that no good boy a job?"

I pictured my mom saying it to me instead of Vanessa so I could pour out real emotion.

"I don't have a car so Anthony picks me up so I won't have to walk in the dark home"

"Right and what you his pusher?" I rolled my eyes.

"Mom I don't get how you can be mad over me selling a little weed but as soon as the rent is due or if the light bill is due you got your hand out with a smile"

I braced myself for the smack that Vanessa delivered not hitting too hard but we made it believable.

"I asked you to get a real job Jemeker not slang drugs"

"Why is it I have to work and you do nothing? I'm not the parent!"

"I've raised you and your siblings, I deserve to be taken care of" I scoffed how I did my own mother earlier.

"Raised us? I raised myself and my siblings! While you were going out"

"Oh please Jemeker, you been living a good life I'm a great damn mother to you and I deserve to be taken care of"

That sent me over the edge, true tears began rolling down my face.

"I've never gotten a chance to be a child and after all I've done from taking care of my brother and sister to paying bills even if the money is dirty I never once got a I'm proud of you baby or a thank you , all you ever do is find shit wrong with me!"

"I've had enough of your smart mouth and you coming in here whenever you want to after being laid up by that boy"

"I'm tired of you treating me so bad when all I ever wanted was your love" I sobbed.

"What you gonna do about it huh? You gonna leave ? Where you gonna go?"

"Anthony is the only one that cares about me, I don't need this type of stress anyway" I swiped the tears away.

"Then go ain't nobody gonna miss you here"

"Why do you hate me so much?" I sniffed watching Vanessa walk closer to me.

"You ruined my life that's why"

I bit my bottom lip to hold back the ugly cry I wanted to let escape.

"CUT" John shouted out.

I turned my back to everyone to get myself together, Vanessa rested a hand on my back.

"You okay?"

I nodded but my tears told another story, John approached standing in front me.

"I'm blown away" He complimented my performance his smile faltered noticing I was still crying.

"Can I get a bottle of water for Erin, have a seat"

John pulled out a chair for me, I sat down playing with my hands

" You going through the same thing? I heard your mom came up here"

I nodded taking the bottle of water from the assistant on set.

"No matter what I do, it's never good enough for her" I croaked.

"You are amazing and you shouldn't feel the need to try and prove it to her"

"She aight?" Nipsey stepped up, I looked away not wanting him to see me weak.

"Just opened up some fresh wounds"

I wiped my face drinking some water, John knelt down in front of me.

"I'm not going to push you too hard today, I want you to get some rest and we will film some more parts tomorrow"

"But I'm-

"Listen I would let you film today but when you going through things emotionally like that while pregnant you need rest not more stress and I'm not heartless enough to do that to you"

I was grateful for John caring about my well being, I stood up accepting a hug from him.

"I think she needs a ride home Nipsey"

"I'm not-

"Just take the damn ride young lady"

I grunted walking off to my trailer with Nipsey on my heels.

"It's just a ride home that's it I don't feel like talking or any extra shit"

"We gotta talk, I let you have yo way long enough"

"The baby is fine and healthy, our talk is done"

I scooped up my things following Nipsey to his car, he opened the door letting me inside.

" Its more we gotta talk about"

I stared out the tinted window shaking my head.

"Not today I don't feel like it"

Nipsey clenched his jaw turning up the music on the radio leaving me to my thoughts.

"Do you even want this baby?" I didn't know why I asked the way he jerked the car I knew I fucked up.

"What you just say?"

"I'm walking around pregnant and never wondered or asked if you wanted the baby"

" Don't ever fix yo mouth to say some dumb shit like that again"

" I didn't ask it to piss you off, we barely know each other and we are having a baby"

"Since you came back I been tryin to get you to talk to me, I know I hurt you dat day and you ain't over it but us communicating because we gonna be parents is more important at least to me it is"

I was stupid enough to think I was special to him and that he actually liked me. It was immature of me to ignore him.

"Your right it is and I will work on it but that's all I'm doing is working out communicating with you about the baby"

"You know it's more than that"

" I haven't forgotten about the great acting you do" Nipsey put his hand on my thigh making me tense up.

"Dat shit was fucked up and I ain't-

I took his hand off my thigh , holding up my free hand.

"Fuck your apology, you meant what you said if you didn't you wouldn't have said it"

"Boog" I caught butterflies hearing my nickname roll off his tongue.

"Boog nothing, if we ain't talking baby then we ain't got shit else to talk about"

Folding my arms I sat back for the ride silently.

"Trust I'm gonna make you change yo mind"

"Goodbye Ermias"

He pulled up in front of the driveway to my home, I chucked the deuces slamming his door.

"On hood thick look good on you"

"Boy bye"