sometimes I feel heartless

I don't know if I enjoy the darkness

but I know I'm uncomfortable

if I leave it

the beating where my heart is

leaves me unfocused

I don't know if I'm alive

or if I'm really breathing

when something happens

I fake a reaction

to match the scene

I've been placed in

it's a little scary

the things I can't feel

still

it gives me a thrill

and it makes me

wonder

if I'm human

or a monster