(Quick a/n: Thank you guys so much for the prayers and condolences. This was a very HARD time for me and my family. I found out I lost my GrannyMa last year on January 29 then one year later to find out my cousin died on March 25, it KILLED me. They died the exact same way and it's a nightmare. I thought I would lose my family during the rapture when Jesus comes, not this early. I'm speechless, but life continues. I'm going to make both of them proud. And I'm going to live for them since their life was taken so quick.

Rest up King Dante and Queen Angela ❤️

"Stay hea with me." August said, pulling me down onto the bed.

I sighed, laying down next to him. I began to massage his hand. A habit I have now because August's hands are extremely soft. "Just come with me."

"Nah. I already told you, I ain' feelin this shit. Somethin ain' sittin right with me."

"That's why I think you should come. You can at least stay in the car and watch from afar."

"No. Why can't you just stay hea or reschedule that shit?" He said.

I sighed again, not wanting to argue any further with him. I'm obviously not going to get my way today.

"Alright, I'll call her and reschedule."

He nodded. "It's bout time you finally listen ta me."

"August, shut up."

If he thought that was funny, he sounds just as stupid as he looks.

"I'm not bout to start with you again. Watch yo mouth." He said, sitting up.

I kept a straight face, while calling Ms. Jackie.

"Hello?" Ms. Jackie answered.

"Hey, Ms. Jackie, this is Sarah and I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to reschedule our brunch."

I heard her smack her lips and sigh. "Why? I was really looking forward to seeing you today."

"I just don't feel too good right now." I said, which wasn't technically a lie. I felt perfectly fine physically, but mentally I could feel my blood boiling again. At this very moment I wanted to smack August again.

"Okay. I hope you get better. Just call me when you're feeling much better."

"Okay. Talk to you later."

"Bye bye now." She said before I hung up the phone.

"Sarah." August called out to me.

I ignored him, rolling my eyes hard before walking out of the bedroom.

"Sarah, what I tell you bout walkin away from me?" I heard August say.

I continued to ignore him, going inside Christian's room. I quickly closed the door, locking it.

"Sarah," He begins to jiggle the door knob. "Jeanie, man, stop playin with me and open the do'. You bein real childish right na. Open the do' so we can talk."

"No. I don't wanna talk to you nor do I want to see you."

"Whatchu mad fa? You mad because I didn't let you go to some bull shittin ass meetin with a fake ass person?"

"Anthony, I'm upset that you literally always regulate my life. I can't do anything without you telling me no. And to top that off you thought it was cool to let out some stupid, distasteful joke. Talking about it's about time I listened to you. You're being real wack right now."

"I'm protectin you, dumb ass lil girl!" He yelled, making me jump.

"I'm not dumb!"

"You actin dumb. Real fuckin dumb. Bruh, open ma fuckin do'."

"Nope. Not until you apologize. And apologize for everything that happened today, including you grabbing me like I'm a child." I crossed my arms, sitting down on the floor.

"No. You fuckin smacked the dog shit outta me , but you want me ta apologize? Fuck on and open the fuckin do'."

"Apologize." I mumbled, playing with the ends of my hair.

He sighed, messing with the door knob again. "Man, fuck you, Jeanie."

"Skip you too, Anthony."

I could hear him walking away from the door. I roll my eyes, biting down on my lip.

Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.

To me, every since we did sexual things to each other, I just feel like we're reaching a certain place where I never thought we'd be. We're always fussing and fighting. We can never agree on anything. Every little thing set both of us off.

At first I thought maybe it was because we're both kinda sexual frustrated and there's no way to get this frustration out, but by arguing with each other. But it was taking a huge turn.

We've been getting almost violent with each other. I'm slapping him and punching him in his chest and he's grabbing me, pushing me away.

And earlier today was horrible. I couldn't even go piAck my baby up because I didn't want him to see August and I fighting like this.

Why can't I just keep my hands to myself and just listen to August. I let my past and my pride get in the way and it's messing me up big time. I know August is just looking out for me and since I've never had a man do that for me, I don't know how to act.

"Because why the fuck you bout ta go see this old bitch?"

"August, watch your mouth! And I'm about to go see her because I haven't seen her in a while. Why do you keep doing this?"

"Doin what?" He said, leaning back on the wall.

"You turn into some psychopath when I'm about to leave the house. I'm steady trying to tell you nothing's gonna happen and if you feel as if something would happen, come."

"I turn inta a psychopath, because last time you left this bitch by ya self, you was damn near bout ta fight fa ya life because of them fuck niggas out ta get you." August said.

I roll my eyes, clearly not knowing what to say back.

"Thought fuckin so. Call that lady and tell her you not going."

"No, you're not my daddy. I don't have to listen to you."

"You fuckin need to. Why you stay tryna argue with a nigga? Just listen to what the fuck I said and stop bein fuckin hardheaded, dumb ass!" He quickly shut his mouth, closing his eyes.

I could feel anger flowing through my body.

"I'm not dumb!" I yelled, throwing my glass cup of water at him.

I swiftly got out of my chair and slapped him.

"Fuck yo problem is? I should smack yo dumb ass fa doing that dumb ass shit. Fuck I tell you bout puttin yo hands on me?"

He grabbed both my hands, yelling all in my face.

"You–"

He cut me off, "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

I quickly got quiet, refusing to look into his eyes.

"You steady puttin yo hands on me, like I'm pose to be yo bitch. Them niggas must've beaten yo ass at that sto', because you actin like you don't know who the fuck I am. You lucky I fuckin love you, Sarah, because if you was some random ass bitch, I would've knocked cho ass the fuck out."

He let go of my hands, pushing me back a little.

"I–You know what, I'm good." August said, walking away from me.

We just seem so bipolar. We didn't start off with mixed emotions and disrespect, so why are you slowing getting there?

It's almost like we're slowing starting to separate. Every since the office fight with Peter and August, we've all been on one thousand. Emotions are high and right now we're trying to survive.

We should not be fighting and arguing like this when Peter and his weak goons are running around looking for me.

I need August and I love him. I'm just confused.

I got off the floor and opened the door to see August sitting down on the floor.

"August," I softly called out for him. I sat down next to him, grabbing his hand. I brung it up to me lips and kissed it. "I'm so sorry, baby. I'm sorry for throwing glass at you, I'm sorry for hitting you, I'm sorry for not listening to you and disrespecting you. There's nothing I can say that will justify my actions and what I did to hurt you. I just need you to forgive me. I'm scared of loving someone again. I don't know how to love, August. I tried loving someone twice and both times, I ended up being abused, sexually, mentally and physically. I know you won't ever hurt me, but I never thought Peter would hurt me and look what happened."

He reached his hand up to wipe my tears. I flinched, before relaxing against his hand.

"I'm so sorry for doing what they did to me to you. You don't deserve to be hit on. I need you to forgive me. If you wanna move on, that's fine. Right now, I'm not the right person for you. I don't know how to love you like you're supposed to be loved. And if someone else can offer you unconditional love and respect, take it, because right now, I'm not a good fit."

He pulled me into a hug, hugging me so tight, I could feel his love entering me body.

"I'm sorry, August." I cried on his shoulder, holding on to him for dear life.

"I ain' goin nowhea. I told you, I'm hea ta stay. We gone fix this and work this out. Neither one of us know how to properly love someone, but we gon learn. I'm gon keep tellin you this. I'm already in too deep with you, ain' no turnin back na."

I lifted my head off his shoulders and looked into his eyes.

He was tearing up. I was finally going to see him in a vulnerable state.

"I love you, August, but I just need to work on myself right now."

"Sarah, please don't." Once I saw a tear drop, I knew I wasn't gone leave this easy.

"I just need a break away from this. From reality. I need a vacation." I sighed, wiping away his tears.

"I need ta protect you, Sarah. I have to. You're ma wife. I can't let you leave without me. I'm goin with you. We a package deal, baybeh. One go, all go. I'm not leavin you alone."

I looked him in his eyes and simply nodded.

What am I thinking. I can't leave August.