❦

"Dri, bring in the last box out of the trunk please! I have to pee!"

Doing as told, I went to my mom's all red 2018 Mercedes Benz SUV that my dad bought for her on her 35th birthday in March.

I grabbed the box that said "Thomas's Things" and felt a smile creep on my face. I didn't realize tears were forming in my eyes until my dad's favorite hat flipped out of the box.

"Okay, dad. I'll stop crying." I chuckled, closing the trunk and taking the box inside.

I always felt his presence which made his death a lot easier for me. It was still very hard at times, but he would always catch me right before I started crying.

He's always hated seeing me cry.

"Thinking about him?"

I smiled, sitting next to my mom on our brand new soft brown plush couches, in our brand new living room, in our brand new house.

"Yea." I laughed. "I didn't even realize I was about to cry until his hat flew out of the box."

"You know Tom never liked to see you cry."

"Right. That's how I always know it's him."

"Alright." She sighed and rubbed my back. "Let's finish unpacking the kitchen before Trini and Mike come over."

I nodded, standing up. I followed her into the kitchen. "Do you like your new room?"

"It's decent. Once I get the rest of the things I need for my office, it'll be better. How about you? You have everything you need or-"

"No, mom. I have everything I need, I promise you."

Ever since my dad passed, my mom has been spoiling me more than ever. They spoiled me when he was here, but it's gotten a lot worse.

In a good way, of course.

Honestly, it did seem too much at times but I always felt bad telling her no. It was as if spoiling me was a way for her to cope, but I didn't want it to get too out of hand.

"Do you want this dish on the island or on the counter?"

My mom turned around, placing her finger on her chin while she thought for a second.

"The island. I have another dish I can put on that side."

She turned back around, going back into the "kitchen" box before turning back around.

"Or do you think is should go on the counter?"

"No, I think it would definitely look better on the island." I chuckled.

"Agreed."

"Mom..."

"Yes, my love?"

"I love you."

She turned to me with a smile. "I love you more. What was that for?"

"I just wanted to let you know."

"Hm okay. How are you feeling about starting at a new school in a week?"

"I'll only have two years there so it shouldn't be that bad. Hopefully it'll go by fast."

"Have you talked to Kenz?"

"Yea, I FaceTimed her this morning before she went to work." I did a small pout. "I miss my best friend."

"I know, honey. We can definitely fly her down soon if you would like."

"I would love."

She chuckled. "Okay. Just see when she's free from work and school and we can figure it all out once we get a date."

"Oh, I love these dining chairs." My aunt, Trinity, gushed as we gave her a mini-tour. "Where's Michael?"

Me and my mom gave each other a look, making all of us laugh.

My aunt scrunched up her face. "Ew, don't even. You guys know we tried that a long time ago, and we'll never try it again. I just knew Tori said he was going to be here, but-" She shrugged. "He isn't."

"He said he couldn't make it today, he'll be here tomorrow. Just in case you wanna pop up out of the blue."

"Ew, stop it."

I made my self comfortable at the end of the table so my mom and aunt could catch up for the time they've missed.

"How've you been Trini? I feel like I haven't seen you in forever."

"Tori, girl. I just seen you at the end of July, but if that's your way of telling me you've missed me then I missed you too, sis."

My phone vibrated in my hand. Pulling down my notifications, I seen a message from my best friend.

👯‍♀️💛

🙃🙃

Typical dramatic Kenz, but I love her. Wouldn't trade her for the world.

👯‍♀️💛

🤣

👯‍♀️💛

😅

👯‍♀️💛

👯‍♀️💛

👯‍♀️💛

🙁

👯‍♀️💛

💔🙂

My aunt hit the table catching my attention and scaring the hell out of me. "Audriana!"

"Huh?"

"You didn't hear me?"

"No, what's up?"

"I said how are you feeling about starting at a new school?"

"I'm okay, just ready to get it over with."

"What do you plan on doing after school? Still want to be a zoologist?"

"Duh. That's a dream I'll never stop reaching for."

She gave me a proud smile. "That's amazing, Dri. Don't ever stop reaching for any dream you have, any goals you want to reach. Anything you set your mind to, you can do."

"I never will. I got my daddy's eyes on me twenty-four-seven so I couldn't give up even if I wanted to."

"That's right." My mom and my aunt said in unison making us smile.

They picked their conversation back up while I went back to my phone.

👯‍♀️💛

"Dri, do you mind going to pick up some lunch? We don't have much here until we go grocery shopping."

I nodded. "I don't mind. What do you guys want?"

"Honestly, Popeyes sounds greasy and amazing right now."

"Popeyes it is. Am I getting the usual family meal?"

"That'll work."

My mom pulled her purse onto the table, opening her wallet and giving me her card and her keys.

"Don't get pulled over."

"I'll try not to." I laughed, walking out of the house.

I'm a little late, but I only have my learner's permit until my 16th birthday in two months.

Living in Vegas, people my age weren't worried about getting a learner's permit let alone a license. As long as they had the most expensive car off the lot, that was all that mattered.

I clearly wasn't one of them.

For the past three days we've been here, and the few times we've came down to visit my aunt- and my uncle on my dad's side, Michael- Popeyes was the main thing we ate while here so I knew exactly where it was.

That was the only place where I knew was located to be honest, but, in the same sense, it's the only place I want to know.

I made sure my phone was connected to the Bluetooth radio before I made my way onto the road. Goosebumps surfaced on my skin when my dad and I's favorite song, Beautiful by Bazzi, played through the speakers.

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful,

Beautiful angel.

Love your imperfections,

Every angle.

Tomorrow comes and goes before you know.

So I just had to let you know-

My phone started ringing and I almost jumped out of my skin.

Either I've been really jumpy lately or people have just been purposely scaring me.

"👯‍♀️💛" appeared on the screen so I slid the bar to answer the call.

"Yo!"

"Hey, bitch."

"Hey, hoe."

"What are you doing? It sounds like you're in a car."

"I am. I'm going to Popeyes."

She gasped. "Wow. Three days apart and you're already doing what we do with another bitch. Did I really mean nothing to you?"

All I could do was laugh. She's really a character, but that's one of my favorite things about her. She's so goofy.

"Kidding kidding. Anyways, I'm calling because you told me to."

"Oh yea. My mom said whenever you're free, she'll buy you a plane ticket to come down here."

"Oh fuck yes. I'll have to talk to Jack because Katie just got fired for getting drunk on the job again."

"She never learns, huh?"

She laughed. "Right. And you're gone so I'm picking up more and more shifts by the day. I think I'm just going to quit and come with you. Your house is big enough for me now."

"Sounds like a plan. Just pack what you need whenever you come down and don't ever go back."

"Ugh, I wish."

"I know, me too."

"Anyways." McKenzie sighed. "I have to go back in. I just stepped outside to call you for a second."

"Okay. Text me when you can. I love you, bestie."

"I love you more, girl. Drive safe."

"Well I'm pulling into Popeyes now, but I'll drive back safely."

"Okay, eat for me."

"You know I will."

She chuckled. "Alright, bye."

"Bye."

I got in the three car line, pulling my phone out and checking my notifications as if I actually had any friends other than Kenz.

Which I didn't.

The most play I would get in my notifications was some weirdos liking my old pictures on my Instagram.

Other than that, my phone was the Sahara Desert.

"Welcome to Popeyes would you like to try..."

No.

"Can I get the twelve piece family meal, six spicy and six mild, with a side of fries, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, and red beans and rice. Nothing to drink."

"Okay. Is that all?"

"Yes, that's all."

"Okay so just to make sure, you want a twelve piece family meal with six spicy and six mild. Along with a side of cajun fries, mashed potatoes and gravy, mac and cheese, and red beans and rice? No drinks?"

"That's perfect."

"Okay. I'll have your total at the first window."

I pulled my mom's card from the middle console, pulling up to the first window as instructed.

"Mom?"

"Yes? Come in."

Opening her door, I looked around her room before sitting on her bed. Just by the looks of her room, you could tell she was a really professional woman. I don't know if that makes sense, but if you seen her room then you would know what I mean.

If my mom wasn't a realtor, then I know for a fact she would have been an interior designer. She has the most amazing taste when it comes to this type of stuff.

I just wished it rubbed off on me at least a little. She says I do a pretty good job, and that she didn't realize she was good at it until she was 21 so that I'll be good at it at 21 too.

I highly doubt that though. Even if I do become "good" at it, I won't be half as amazing as her.

We could have been a dream team though. She'll do the decorating, I'll do the photography. Now that would have been amazing and I wouldn't have to worry about trying to find a job.

"Can I sleep in here with you tonight?"

I didn't care how childish that just sounded coming out of my mouth, I was just in one of those moods where I needed my mom. It's happened a couple of times since my dad passed away, and even though he would distract me from crying the best that he could, there were just some emotions he couldn't distract me from.

Not as long as he was gone.

The only way it could stop was if he was here, and I knew that wasn't possible so there were some emotions I just had to deal with. I couldn't suppress everything, it's just not healthy.

Honestly, the worse feeling is just knowing that no matter how much I cry, no matter how much I beg God to bring him back, he won't. It's not possible.

"Of course, my love. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine just..."

"Just one of those nights?"

I felt a tear fall down my cheek as my mom wrapped her arms around me. "Yep."

"I know, baby. It's hard, I know. Cry as much as you need to. I know you miss him, I miss him too."

"He's probably watching over me right now calling me a 'goo-goo-cry-baby'." I laughed through tears, making her laugh.

He would always call me that when I cried because he knew that it would make me laugh. Which it always did.

And, clearly, it still does.

"He would. He would also be telling you that he doesn't want to see you cry, but I'm not going to tell you that because I know it's necessary. Just know he's always here with you, with us."

Just at that second, my dad's obituary that my mom had set up on her bedside dresser fell.

"See."

I chuckled.

I love you, my angel.

😩💖☺️