《This Can't Be The End》Chapter 38
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The weeks blur by and it's now nearing winter break, there is one day left, today being the last of our classes, and Ryver's last game was the other day, and last season he will ever play as a high schooler went well.
Alright better than well, he was amazing, and I was the only girl he turned to after they won, yes that got me a few dirty looks from a couple of girls, but I didn't pay much attention to those bystanders.
I was content and happy, so I attempted not to let that anxiety settle in, and with Ryver's arms around me?
It wasn't as hard, he was holding against the tide that usually was so easy to bend to, and fall into its whim.
So to say things are going well isn't it a lie, things are great, me and my crazy friends have also not stumbled against any trouble.
I'm always a little more worried about Jake though luckily he is doing fine, there haven't been any encounters with Rachel, to my relief he really did back up after he saw her with someone.
I think that it had been his final straw, seeing her with another guy was like a wake-up call to him, at that moment it had finally settled in that she isn't his Rachel anymore, and that she was just Rachel.
I've tried multiple times to get him to speak about it and he doesn't budge, so I sadly have to wait until he is ready.
I doubt the stubborn bastard will ever be.
Doesn't mean I won't always be there for him.
Now I am steering my way towards the cafeteria, when I hear two voices I recognized near a corner, no one ventures to at lunch except the people who have lockers here which aren't many.
"We could be good together!" Kiara's voice says.
"And I told you, you need to leave my girlfriend alone, it doesn't mean that fucked two years ago, that we will ever have a relationship," Ryver says gruffly, even when we are fighting I never heard him sound this mean.
I am about to walk away because I trust Ryver and don't need to hear anything more that will surely make me feel like shit like I'm not enough.
He slept with her, not a big deal since it was two years ago.
Not yesterday, not even this year, I'm not dumb enough to assume Ryver is some saint.
But what stops me is something Kiara says.
"Really? She's a bitch everyone knows that and we're good together,"
What could make her think I'm bitch if she hasn't spoken more than a single word to me, basically ever.
"What the hell is your problem?"
I start to walk away, not really caring what the rest of their conversation might be, I can tell Ryver isn't going to do anything dumb, like cheat on me with her.
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It makes no sense how much faith I have in him when my heart has already been shattered once, by a boy who promised me the world, promised to be better and broke every single one of those promises within a night.
I take a peak, when I pass by, knowing they won't see me to be sure that I have nothing to worry about and sure enough there is a great distance between them.
Kiara tries to put her hand on his shoulder but he shakes it off immediately, she seems angry, he seems annoyed.
"You'll regret this, I'm just trying to help you from the disaster that's going to happen soon enough,"
I see her turn her heel and rush towards the cafeteria that is only a few steps away, when walking really fast, which I do, because there's no way I'm walking slow, in a situation like this.
I make it likely not to be seen by anyone.
That doesn't stop my mind from reeling and spinning in all sorts of directions at the thought of what could she have meant?
*~*~*~*
It's later in the evening and I'm at Ryver's house, which isn't a place I come to often.
The last time I had come here was when I had met his parents, the event wasn't as strenuous as I feared, which came as a relief. I have no clue what I would've been like if they didn't like me.
Probably panic.
Luckily nothing extreme had happened, so my heart was fine.
The interaction went like this.
"Mom, dad this is Ensleey the gir-"
"Ensleey it's so good to finally meet you!" His mother threw her arms around me, which scared me a bit at the time, but Ryver had later reassured me that he never brought anyone home to meet his mom.
It made me feel special and I had a stupid grin on my face to hide from Ryver because I'm the only girl he's brought home.
There's no way that couldn't have brought excitement to me, that doesn't make it weird, I think.
Anyways, his dad gave a small smile, and a small 'nice to meet you', and shook my hand.
That was it, after that, it was just simple talk, his mother was kind and sweet, she mentioned Ryver's brother at one point, but I didn't mention that he was actually one of my closest friends.
Right now, his mom has just gone to spend the weekend with her sister who lives an hour away, and his dad is at a car show, which is part of his job requirement.
He's an Auto Sales Manager.
Leaving me and Ryver alone at his house.
We are seated on the couch and just finished watching 'Clueless', which I had to convince Ryver to watch because from the description he had said it sounds stupid.
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I of course fired back that he is the stupid one.
Of course, he in the end had relented and we watched it.
I bribed him of course, with that the next two times we watch a movie he'd choose.
So now we sit huddled on the couch as the movie credits roll on.
"Kiara spoke to me today, if she gives you any trouble let me know, okay?"
I didn't expect him to tell me, but Ryver is always full of surprises, so why did I think that this time it would be any different.
"About what?" I already feel guilty as the words tremble from me, why oh why am I lying?
I'm horrible, but there is also a part of me that looks like I spy on him or something, I don't want to look like I don't trust him.
Because I do trust him, that is, I trust him more than my heart should, with all that it has been through.
"Nothing important," he smiles and gives me a small peck on the cheek, "I'd tell you if it was serious angel,"
My heart is like a popsicle, on a hot summer day, except it's not melting because of the scorching hot sun, it's melting from the impact of Ryver's words.
His words that my mind, body, and soul, thrive for.
"I know, I was just curious," I say, it's a lie, because I'm wondering if her threat meant anything, or were they empty words, that were her failed attempt at scaring him off?
If Ryver isn't concerned, then I will trust that it probably isn't worth the extra thought.
*~*~*~*
R y v e r s P o v
I'm waiting for Ensleey, scrolling through my phone, while laying on her bed, we are planning on hitting up a coffee shop downtown and taking a stroll around.
But Ensleey's still in the bathroom since she had wanted to put on light makeup.
So I have no choice but to wait patiently on her bed.
My phone bounces off the bed, when I attempt to put it down lightly, well I threw it but I didn't fling that hard.
I sigh and bend down to retrieve it, then realize I can't see it.
Great.
I get off the bed and see it went under the bed. How the hell had I managed that?
When I reach my hand out for the damn phone, my fingers graze a smooth surface, naturally, I'm curious about what it could be.
I pull it out along with my phone, feeling as though it could be a box.
Sure enough, it is, when out in the light, I see a purple rectangle shaped box that reminds me of a gift box. Probably is.
I know I shouldn't, knowing it's none of my business.
But the memory of finding Molly in her bathroom, playing in my mind, as if I'm remembering a scene from a movie.
Before I can change my mind, I remove the purple lid of the box.
In the box, there are pictures, a lot of pictures, and a few trinkets, the pictures are all faced down.
I take a deep breath, before taking the stack of pictures between my fingers.
I flipped the whole stack up of the rectangle shaped photographs, and met with a younger version of Ensleey, though she looks different, in so many ways unrecognizable to the girl I know.
What hurts most is the bright smile etched onto her face, and the eyes that have never shown so much light, in all the time I have known her, are looking at a boy, who has a matching smile.
They are staring at the camera with so much love and adoration, and it shatters me, seeing the girl who slowly is starting to consume my whole being.
She's in his arms, and she is the one who took the selfie. I can see her arm in the picture. How is this the same girl who despises taking any pictures of herself?
I know I'm trying to plan my own death when I place the picture on the side and flip to the next one.
Yep, I'm definitely trying to kill myself, just shoot me why don't you?
This one is worse, the boy is hugging her to him, and is placing a kiss on her cheek. She is laughing, and is completely happy, someone took the picture, and not them I can tell from the angle.
Like a fucking idiot, I flip through a few more, all of them display happiness and love, so I stop not being able to take it anymore, when I am trying to place them back I notice something on the back of one.
A small note that seems to be written in what most likely is a black sharpie.
~
You are my world, my everything, I will love you for the rest of forever.
-P
~
I don't know who this 'P' person is but I know I want to have a nice small talk with him, nothing serious.
I pick up one of the random things in the box and notice a small lipstick tube, a light red colour.
Something I have never seen her wear, and wonder why it's in the box.
I hear the water running in the bathroom, and am snapped out of my thoughts.
I place everything, in what I hope is in order, and push under the bed again.
At this moment I wonder what the heck have I gotten myself into.
Wonder if I have made a mistake.
But even with those thoughts I know there is no way I can let her go.
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