It's insane how much your life can change over the course of four months. It's nearing December, and if you had asked me four months ago what I would be up to, I would have shrugged and said nothing, just a boring winter break coming up.

But now as it nears winter break, I feel jitter excitement in knowing I will be spending this time with Ryver, and I can't wait to see what the future will hold for us, I mean what could go wrong?

As of now, nothing terrible has occurred, only one of my monsters from my past has taken space in my life, as of now only one, and I think I managed to slay that one off for good.

Or at least his brother had, I find that to be a great relief to have had someone to stop him, the thought of what could have happened brings a shiver up my spine.

But I am hopefully free of his venomous clutches, and my other demons?

I know won't strike without their leader.

Luckily he is in a place that should have no escape, for the next six years, at least.

That thought doesn't always ease my doubts and fears, except it is enough to ensure danger is less likely.

I realize I should be able to stop dwelling on my past, but how can I when it's made me into the sad outcome of the person I am today?

My mother once said that the memories you make can either make or break you, that those same memories can be what form you into the person you are in the future.

She was right, the people who I knew and the memories I made with them, whether they are bad or good, have shaped me into the person I've become.

My mind whirls in a thunderstorm of thoughts, but the one that takes the front seat of it all is what Ryver is planning for our date.

I won't lie and say that I'm not thrilled about this, because, unlike last time, I feel only a sense of excitement.

Since again Ryver wants to be mysterious, and not give me a general idea of where we are going. I pair up an outfit that can be considered not too casual, nor is it overly dressy.

I'm wearing a black and white houndstooth skirt that has an array of buttons trailing up on the right side, and I have a black knit sweater tucked in, to protect me from the harsh December wind, I have leggings underneath. To finish the look I paired it with black ankle boots.

I video chat with Cleo to make sure I don't look horrible. She is currently cooped in her dorm studying so she couldn't make it over to my house.

"You look great," she says with a mouth full of pizza, she is laying on her stomach, you can see her feet swinging in the air in the background, along with a cluster of books, that are placed carelessly to one side.

"You sure?" I say.

"Ens you're wasting my precious time, you look amazing," She sighs, "we've been over this for the past five minutes."

"You just want to phone Theo," I grumble, the girl has been deprived of her boyfriend for the past week. I want to add and get some dick, but don't.

I don't have time to get into a long argument over this.

"Stop talking and go wait for your man," she says, with a wave of her hand before she hangs up on me.

She is a bitch, and I have the horrible privilege of loving that bitch.

I sigh and take her advice. I have nothing better to do anyway.

At seven to the dot. I hear the chime of the doorbell.

I rushed to the door, not wanting him to wait long.

I open the door, to be met with the boy who has stolen my heart. He is dressed in a black tee-shirt, on top is a denim washed jean jacket, normal denim jeans, he also has a pair of boots on.

I can't help but think to myself that there has never been a hotter man ever.

Am I overreacting?

Most probably yes, but I couldn't care less, because he is my boyfriend.

"Hi." He is the first one to speak, he leans down and pecks my lips, bringing the same intense feeling up my spine, that only he manages to bring out of me.

"Hi," I say, replying with a huge grin.

"Ready?" He asks almost like our first date, I grab my purse and jacket, and then we are off.

He opens the car door for me like a true gentleman, and makes small talk with me, in an attempt to distract me from asking where we are going.

I think he finds joy, in my despair, because every time I pose an indirect question casually as to where he's taking me, he smirks as if my suffering is the best thing he's ever gone through.

Well congrats buddy, at least I can make you laugh.

A part of me wants to say my thoughts aloud, to see how'd he react, but know that isn't the right move.

So I keep my flap shut.

I wonder if the word flap is still a thing?

I doubt it, but it seems to be a great word.

My eyes go wide when I see we arrived at the parking lot and layed in front of it is a long walkway, and on each side, you can see various food trucks.

Ryver turns and retrieves something from the back. That's when I realized it's a picnic blanket.

"They normally do these in the summer, but sometimes they do it once in the winter, and well today is one of those days, they usually have pretty good food so I thought it'd be nice but we can go somewhere else-"

I kiss him to shut him up, just like he's done to me on multiple occasions.

"No, this is perfect," I say with a fond smile, "you always make everything perfect, Ryver."

"Glad you think so," he says, but I can hear the relief in his tone.

We emerge from the car, Ryver as usual opens my door, and we venture about hands clasped together, as we wander the street full of various food trucks.

From Chinese, Mexican, to shawarma, there are about ten food trucks scattered around.

Though we in the end settled on tacos from a Mexican looking food truck.

There are people that can be heard speaking in the background as a girl with short black hair prepares our food.

The whole scene is beautiful, with many people scattered on different ends, and a small ice skating rink placed to one end. Seems to be mainly small children playing in it.

We end up settling next to a maple leaf tree that appeared to have lost many of its leaves, in the months that have passed.

To sit we had placed the picnic blanket on the ground.

It was beautiful, just me and Ryver in our own little bubble.

The food was great too, and now we lay on the ground laughing and talking. Ryver is leaning back against the trunk of the tree, and I am lying against his chest.

I can feel every ridge of muscle this close, the feel of his arms securing me to him, and the scent that is Ryver.

"You know how couples sometimes put their initials on tree trunks?" Ryver mutters, staring at the wood of the tree.

"Yeah?" I am curious as to if he is getting to where I assume he is.

He smirks, yep he definitely is thinking it.

"Do you want to?" he asks, still holding his smirk.

"How?" I laugh for no reason leaning a bit away from him to give me a better view of his face.

"I don't know I've never done this," we both laugh now.

I find a sense of satisfaction knowing I am probably the only girl he has done this with.

An idea strikes after a moment "a pen."

"A pen?"

"Yeah, we can try to carve it with a pen," I say.

"Where would we find a pen Ensleey?"

"My purse." I say in a 'duh' tone.

Even when I only bring a small purse, to hold my phone and wallet, I always carry other things in the spare pockets. Pads, because you never know when you'd need those, to other random things

After some scouring, I found the pen.

"I don't know if this is going to work Ensleey," Ryver says when he sees the pen that is laid in the palm of my hand.

"We can try," I shrug, moving from his embrace completely, not wanting to, but also want our names in the tree more.

I attempt for a minute, when the sound of something cracking can be heard, I look at Ryver and his laugh vibrates around us.

The tip of the pen-the blue part that writes-broke off, why the heck did it make that noise?

"Told you so," he smiles at me.

I don't look at him disappointed we won't be doing this.

"But we can still do this,"

"Ryver you did see what just happened right?"

"I have a pocket knife," He says and that's when I notice that his key ring that is in between his fingers has a pocket knife.

"So you just watched me struggle for the fun of it?" I say.

"You looked cute why should I have stopped you?" he teases

"I hate you," I say even with the words I still find myself letting out a small chuckle.

"I don't think you do," he says, locking me in a heated kiss but doesn't elaborate on his words.

I don't say anything being too consumed in the feel of his mouth on mine.

We eventually carve our names onto the tree trunk, it takes a bit of work, and the heart ends being lopsided a bit, the 'R' being slightly bumpy, and the 'E' looking a bit off.

Though to my eyes, it is beautiful.

The carving is of a medium-sized heart, and inside it reads: "R+E"

It's adorable and probably very cheesy.

Ryver doesn't seem to care either as he smiles at our handiwork.

"Your mine Enlseey, my angel and i'm yours." He says suddenly.

"You don't have to tell me Ryver, I know that all too well," I say, giving him a light peck to his left cheek, without admitting the truth that his words hit me to the point it makes me want to hold him to the end of time.

We went back to Ryver's car, shortly after that.

He ends up coming inside my house, saying his parents are out of town so he can stay if I want him to.

I of course agree, the more time with him the better.

We settle in my bed after I change, and give him PJ pants that belong to Jake, that he has left here from one of the countless times he has stayed over.

All is fine, except for one minor detail. Ryver isn't wearing a shirt, and I can't help but stare at his perfect chest.

When he had gotten up to go to the bathroom and was making his way back to me I again couldn't help my eyes from staring.

My eyes were seriously some perverts.

How dare they stare at this perfect boy.

Okay, I'm trying to make excuses because damn I have never had this rush of emotions flood me from seeing someone shirtless.

"What are you staring at?" He asks crap he noticed.

"N-nothing," I stutter.

"You can stare as much as you want, angel I told you I am all yours," He says and leans down to where I am sitting on the bed, he only intended to peck my lips, but I wrap my arms around him his neck, trapping him there.

I hear the low groan, and it's all the encouragement I need to keep kissing him, and not pull away with embarrassment.

He climbs on the bed still kissing me but not doing more, we have been walking cautiously around the line, and never crossing the tracks far enough, only leaving us with some heated make out sessions.

I am aware that he is doing it for my benefit, but tonight I feel ready to give him the green light.

So I lay back on the bed, pulling him by the shoulders down with me.

"We don't have to do this," Ryver says, his voice coming out in a pant.

"I want to," I tell him, I see the pointed look he gives me, "Ryver I want this."

"Tell me if you change your mind?"

I nod and his lips descend on mine once more.

I don't admit to him that I have never done anything like this sober.

Because why should I place more questions for him to ask?

Instead, I focus on the feel of his soft lips placed firmly on mine invading my air in a way I never would have thought I would need.

I need him.

That is my main thought.

~~~~~~~~

A u t h o r s N o t e

Thank you so much for reading!

Hope you enjoyed this chapter.

It would mean a lot if you can vote and comment.

-R.E