i hide between the library shelves at lunchtime / / ( i hide between lines of strawberry red poetry at lunchtime )

in springtime, i would sit alone under • cherry blossoms • and eat • strawberries • while watching the • dusty blue • sky smeared with • cotton candy • wisps of clouds

in AUTUMN, i would eat honey buns and sip chai tea under maple leaves while watching the autumn LEAVES fall like me

inwinter i would sip books like chai tea and eat poetry like strawberries insteadof sitting in the cafeteria witheringaway inacorner sitting alone at a-

there is a hand on my shoulder and when i jolt my head around suddenly we are just inches apart and i'm staringintoyoureyes (empty eyes beige+green//eyes spring//eyes graygoldgreen//eyes iwanttodrowninyour//eyes) and a gasp of shock escapes my throat and my cheeks burn and my cells explode and lightning dances over my skin where you touch me

your eyes, a mystery

your eyes,

your eyes rippling with laughter ///the color of spring/// , the ///color of golden growth/// exploding from the snow when spring day finally arrives

"you weren't at lunch today," you say. we are the only ones in the library, our hearts the only ones beating ⁞ doesn't it make the universe feel so much bigger? so much lonelier?

"here's your lunch," you smile, eyelashes streaking over your cheeks as you push a transparent red plastic box into my hands. there's a honey bun and a bowl of strawberries in it.

you lean away and / tilt your head as / you looked at me, / waiting,

there's a soft ache in my chest, and in your eyes —[ i can't take your lunch from you.]— i smile at you, before saying,

"eating is not allowed in the library," i tell you,

"i could take you to the cafeteria instead," you laugh, • eyes half closed sparkling • cheeks rising • your teeth flash • winter feels a little less colder

🌙

the honey bun bleeds warmth into my palm ;;; they taste as sweet as your smile • as warm as your mind

the strawberries are cold / and r•e•d / red like the blood in your veins / and the scars on your wrists beneath your coat ;;; the taste as sweet as your gaze • as cold as your heart