Opening Song.

Harmonic jingle with the jazz music: Welcome----to-----Classroom---of----the---elite----Radio-----!!!!!

Author-San (Who sounds like Dean Martin with the British accent): Hi! My dear readers! Welcome to Welcome to Classroom of the Elite Radio! The radio for everyone in the family! I'm your poor pervert Author-San! And beside me, in this studio. Please give them a warm welcome! our beloved actors and actresses!!!!!

Ayanokouji: Hi, everyone. Ayanokouji Kiyotaka, playing Ayanokouji Kiyotaka desu.

Horikita: Hi, Horikita Suzune, playing Horikita Suzune desu.

Kushida: Kushida Kikyo, playing Kushida Kikyo desu. Love you all!

Yamauchi: Hi! Yamauchi Haru----

Horikita: Is it necessary to introduce ourselves? And what do you mean with me playing myself?

Yamauchi: Oi, it's my-----

Ichinose: I also think it's no need. Oh! My name is Ichinose Honami, playing Ichinose Honami desu!

Yamauchi: You steal my intro----

Author-San: I agreed with you, Ichinose-San! What if we start our program?

Ayanokouji: If you said so. First, thank you to every reader. You all are my tool---

Horikita: What?

Ayanokouji: My tool for increasing our encouragement. I have to thank you a hundred times.

Author-San: Ah, my tears---Well, today, we will do this fanfiction's reaction. I hope we will finish the first volume in one chapter. So I'll give you only highlights and outstanding parts. So we won't waste our time!

Ryuen: Tell them, author. You're just too lazy to do a whole volume!

Ishizaki: Eh! Ryuen-San, why don't you say that Kuku, anymore?

Ryuen: It's my character for acting. I'm not doing it in real life.

Ibuki: No matter how he looks in the set. Ryuen-Kun actually is a good man. He gives me a Persian Fabric for my birthday too.

Ryuen: (Laugh) You exaggerate me, Ibuki-Chan.

Author-San: Well, I will leave this radio to you all. Remember, do your best. And please remember that this isn't the canon for this fanfiction's timeline. Hm. Using with the fanfiction is kinda weird.

(Author-San leaves the room.)

Ayanokouji: Ok. Let start our programs. What about we start with our classic opening scene. The bus scene.

Chapter 1

Although being called the luckiest man in the world. Sometimes I wonder if it's true.

For example the first school day.

That day, I missed the bus since I overslept.

You may ask, it's just a bus.

No, it's not just any bus. Because when I looked through the window, I saw two cute girls on the bus.

The first girl was the Yamato Nadeshiko. Her long hair is dark as the bottom of the ocean. Her skin is bright as the moon (but not as rough). And she is the ice-princess type. How much Poonya did she have to be beautiful like this?

The other was the girl with the angelic face. Her brown short hair makes her look cute and childish. I can feel a positive power pervaded from her.

Who won't be enjoyed riding with two angels?

There was another blond, well-built guy on the bus too. He is an attractive guy so I didn't mind riding with him.

But I saw them wore the same uniform as me. So I ensured I would meet them again at the school; Tokyo Metropolitan Advanced Nurturing School.

So I waited for another bus.

Ayanokouji: After I know you three. I just realized that I was very lucky back then.

Ike: What are you talking about, Ayanokouji? Riding the same bus with Horikita-Chan and Suzune-Chan is the best gift!!!

Ayanokouji: If you know Horikita and Kushida better, you won't say that. Ok, I need to stop talking, I feel like someone is going to use her compass.

Koenji: Yes, I remember that bus. Ah, there was an annoying lady who tried to force me to give my seat to an old hag! Ridiculous.

Hirata: You should give her a seat, Koenji-Kun.

Kushida: I tell him. But he didn't listen to me. In the end, there was a man giving that old lady a seat.

Ayanokouji: You were on that bus too, weren't you?

Horikita: Yes.

Karuizawa: And you didn't give her a seat! Woh, that's wicked! Suzuchan.

Horikita: I just stand with my principal. What about you? Karukei. If you were me, would you give her a seat?

Karuizawa: Of course, not! But, Suzuchan. You didn't give her a seat because of your principal. I wouldn't give her a seat because I would sleep as soon as I found the seat on the bus. We are not the same. Someone give me that Breaking Bad guy meme, please.

Kushida: Someone may be confused with the way they talked to each other. Let me explain. Karuizawa-San and Horikita-San is so closed in the production. After we finished the shooting, they always hang out together.

Ayanokouji: Let's move on to the next scene. Do you remember the first time we know this school's rules?

In this school, There are special rules that make it different from another school.

You have to stay inside the campus for the next three years. Contact with anyone outside the school is forbidden. You are in completely another world.

Luckily, Inside the school, there are many other facilities so that students don't suffer from being restricted. There are karaoke, theater rooms, cafes, and even boutiques. It's like a small town.

Make me feel like I was in another world.

And there is also its own currency.

"I will now hand out student ID cards. With this card, you can buy anything from any of the shops and facilities around campus. It works like a credit card. However, be careful of how many points you use. There's nothing you can't buy at school. If there's something on school grounds, it's purchasable." Chabasira-sensei kept talking.

This is the S-System. In this school, the money replaces by the point.

"You will get 100,000 points each month. You could either transfer it to anyone else or keep it until next month. However, bullying other people for points is prohibited. The school is very strict on matters concerning bullying. Oh I almost forget, 1 point worth 1 yen"

Hirata: I felt like I was dreaming back then.

Ike: Yes. 100,000 yen per month. I never touched that much money before.

Yahiko: That's why you spend all of them in one month? Idiot?

Sudo: Oi, what did you say?

Katsuragi: Stop your mouth and enjoy the movie, Yahiko.

Yahiko: Sorry, Katsuragi-San.

Chabashira: I want you to pay attention to my lines. You will get 100,000 points each month. Do you see something wrong?

Ichinose: Yes. Sae-Sensei said you will get 100,000 points this month. Why did you say that?

Chabashira: Well. It's because the director gives me the wrong screenshot. We were shooting the fourth chapter when we realized that I said the wrong lines. I talked with Author-San and decided to change my role.

Ayanokouji: You can say it's the right decision. Oh, the next scene is our first met. Do you remember Horikita?

Horikita: No, I don't.

I said suddenly. "Ehm, I'm Ayanokoji Kiyotaka. Nice to meet you."

I tried to smile as wide as I could to tell her I'm a friendly guy.

She looked at me like she looked at some stone sculpture.

"Horikita Suzune." She said and let her eyes be with the book without more interacting with me.

Thank you. Have a good day.

What happened? The smile is the most efficient device for beginning a friendship, isn't it?

I looked at my reflection in the window's glass.

Oh, I see. I wasn't smiling.

I tried to smile but it's impossible. How could I forget that? I couldn't smile.

Because of my congenital disease. I couldn't do any expression on my face but 'I am the heartless monster who think everyone else is nothing more than a tool' face. The doctor said the present technology couldn't cure this disease yet.

Matsushita: Aw. My poor Ototo!

Ayanokouji: I will say for the last time. I'm not your brother.

Yamauchi: Onee-Chan! I fear the dark. Can I sleep with you tonight----

Bonk!

Miyake: Don't worry. Matsushita. The horny police got him.

Ichinose: Back to the story. Ah, Ayanokouji-Kun. Is this disease even real?

Ayanokouji: Yes. I suffered because of it for a long time.

Inogashira: Phew. At first, I thinks it's because you were raised by a secret organization, making you become a heartless monster. My great detective's sense can be wrong sometimes.

Shinohara: What do you mean---

Inogashira: Nothing.

Horikita: Wait. We can't skip this scene.

Ayanokouji: Which scene?

Horikita: Well, your legendary introduction.

Ichinose: Wow. That's interesting.

Ryuen: I wonder what he would be.

Ayanokouji: Trust me. There is nothing.

Horikita: Well, I will play it then.

Ayanokouji: Horikita. I beg your mercy.

Kushida: Oops. Sorry, Ayanokouji-Kun. I accidentally touch the play button.

Ayanokouji: Wait---

"Ah... My name is Ayanokouji Kiyotaka. I'm not good at anything... But I will try to be close with everyone."

I lost it. Not gonna lie. I lost it.

Not cold. Not cool. Everything is normal.

I sat down. Everyone clapped for me as they tried to console me. If everything went this way. I would be forgotten. Just the background in the class.

Something flashed in my mind.

"Oh. I enjoy Buddhism very much!" I said loudly.

(Death air for a minute)

Ayanokouji: Please, your guy. This is a reaction. Please give me a reaction.

Ike: Sorry. Ayanokouji. Sorry for calling you a lucky bastard.

Ryuen: I--I didn't expect this.

Ayanokouji: Is there any reaction but feeling pathetic?

Ichinose: No matter how pathetic you are. You will always be my first boyfriend.

Horikita: I don't think you can have 2 first boyfriends.

Koenji: Beautiful! Cool! No one can compare!

Ayanokouji: Here come some good reactions.

Koenji: Hm? Are you talking with me? Sorry, Ayanormalboy. I'm looking at the mirror so I don't know what happens.

Ayanokouji:...

Kikyo: Well. Minna-San. Let's see the second chapter!

Someone said the men's brain is at their lower body, not their head.

This is the nature of male creatures.

But we are the male humans, not the male animal.

If everyone was controlled by their desire, the world would be a savage place.

Buddhism has the five most important interdicts called Seela 5.

The third one is Kamesumicha Jara Veramanee Sika Pathangsamathiyami.

In conclusion. Don't be too horny. You shouldn't cheat your lover or sexually harassment anyone.

And now, At the swimming class, by the pool. I felt like my classmate completely forgot those interdicts.

I was here, surrounded by the horny teenager.

Karuizawa: You're right, Ayanokouji-Kun. Our class is filled with horny monsters. Of course, except My Hirata-Kun.

Yamauchi: Really, because he borrowed me Shizu---

Hirata: Shizuka-Chan's doll! I'm Doraemon's fan.

Karuizawa/ Sato/ Shinohara: That's cute!

Yukimura: Why do you seem to be afraid of something, Yukimura? Anyway. I agree with Ayanokouji's point. I believe the genius use their upper head more than their lower head. Actually, I believe that the size of the lower head is inverse to the size of the upper head.

Sudo: So do you think you are the most genius man in the world?

Yukimura: I didn't---What do you mean?

Koenji: Huh. This is what commoners think. A true god-like me can use two heads at the same time!

Ryuen: Move on from this topic, please.

Katsuragi: Huh, why do you seem to be uncomfortable with this topic?

Ibuki: Ryuen-Kun is sensitive with something like this. Forgive him.

Ryuen: Ibuki-Chan! Don't tell them.

Yamauchi: Can we fast forward a bit? Ah, Stop. Thank you.

"Here come the girls!" Ike yelled with a happy face. When the girls came out of the changing room. Although I thought I was tough enough to not lose to the dark desire. The high schoolers with the swimsuit still got me. This is nirvana or something? I asked myself while looking at the girls in a nice shape.

There is Kushi Kikyo who always has an angelic smile. Only a week. She became the most popular girl in the school. She also had friends in other classes. She talked with me once. It's just asking for my telephone number. But she's very friendly and said that we should hang out sometimes.

Also My neighbor, Horikita Suzune. She still walked alone. Cold as always. After she told me her name. We never talked again. There was no luck for me anymore. But otherwise, I felt like if I related to her, I would get into some trouble in the future. It was just the feeling though.

Ayanokouji: I don't think this is the important highlight----

Ike: Shut up. And enjoy. Ayanokouji. Enjoy it.

Yamauchi: Rewind, please.

Sudo: Gross. You two are gross. Oh, that's Suzune. Please stop at this frame.

Karuizawa: What are you doing, Suzuchan? Stop! Someone stops her! She has a compass!

Ishizaki: Fast forward!! Oh my god!! Fast Forward!!

Ryuen: This is why I accept the invite to this radio.

After the girls finished. Onodera was the winner. She was in the swimming club so her time is 26 seconds. My cold neighbor came for the second. Kushida's time is 31 seconds. Not bad but she got fourth place in the end.

I walked to the pool without thinking about the win. I was in the same group as Sudo. So I just tried to run away from the last place.

I passed Horikita at the pool. She looked a little bit grumpy. Maybe she is the kind of girl that hates the loss. Seeing someone sad makes my heart pained. That man told me to act nice to everyone, it will increase my luck.

So I just said.

"You're wonderful, Horikita."

Horikita looked at me suspiciously. Maybe when I said a pretty thing with a straight face. It's felt like I was teasing her. I wished she didn't feel that way.

"Thank you. Do your best. Ayanokouji-Kun."

The second sentence from her mouth. And she remembered my name! And she blessed me!

Ayanokouji: (Sigh)

Horikita: What's wrong, Ayanokouji-Kun?

Ayanokouji: I miss that time. When people still comment on every paragraph. When I still thought you are a cute girl. The time has gone very fast.

Kushida: Well. Do you mean you have a crush on Horikita back then?

Ayanokouji: No. I just think it'll be lucky if I can befriend her.

Ichinose: What about now?

Ayanokouji: Reject this question. I feel unsafe to answer.

I stood on the platform happily. I didn't mind Sudo or who else besides me. Today is my lucky day. I won the bet. The beautiful girls talked with me. I'm the luckiest man in the world. What could go wrong?

And then, I saw a spider climb on the platform.

"Ready, Set---"

I'm scared of nothing. But this thing ---scared me.

It's because of trauma in my youth. Something was invading the White Room. It called itself the heroes. But he came into my room at the midnight so I was afraid of him so much.

I remembered everything. He punched the WR's employee. Pin them with the roof by his spider web. That evil in the red-blue suit. The black spider was on his chest.

He kidnapped me and said he will help me out of hell. That time, I didn't know what that man did. So I think That evil in the red was going to kill me.

However that man's friend--- I think he is more like allies. That man has no friend. His allies with six metal arms helped me from the spider evil. It ran away with the giant robot called "Leopadon".

Since then. I couldn't stand a spider.

So when I saw a spider that came from nowhere---

"". Sensei yelled.

I jumped off the platform into the water and swam as fast as I can to get away from that spider. I swum and didn't interested in anything but trying to be farthest from that thing.

I reached the other side of the pool. I kneeled at the edge and gasped.

Sensei looked at me with surprise on his face.

Sudo reached my side 2 seconds later. He stared and asked.

"Ayanokouji, how could you ever do that?"

Ishizaki: God damn!!

Onodera: I'm very surprised. He did it in 17.12 seconds. He broke the world record!!

Ichinose: Um. You remind your past before your power awakes. So you are a shonen protagonist, confirm!

Ayanokouji: Come on. It's just a coincidence.

Horikita: You said that phrase too much. Maybe we should change this fanfiction to CoTe: It's just a coincidence.

Katsuragi: What happened next?

Sudo: He beat all of us, and won the first prize. I'm still angry!

Ryuen: Tell me your secret. Ayanokouji.

Ayanokouji: Another spider.

Then, I saw someone sitting on the side.

Horikita was there. Alone again.

I decided to talk with her. After beating the world record twice. I was confident that today my luck skill had been activated. So it's time for a headshot.

I walked to her and said. "How are you, Hori..."

My words were cut off because I slipped. The floor is very slippery and I just climbed out of the pool. Horikita's eyes opened wide since I fell into her.

"Oof!"

I opened my eyes and realized I was on Horikita's body.

"What are you doing, Ayanokoji-Kun?" Horikita said and blushed.

"I'm sorry. It's just the accident." Wait, why did the line feel so familiar.

I was on the cute girl's soft body... in the swimsuit. Did this a thing called Service Scene?

I had heard that my senior at the WhiteRoom who couldn't pass the test will get this fate for all of his life. They couldn't stand firmly and would fall on the cute girls every 2 minutes. At the WhiteRoom we call them.

H.A.R.E.M. Protoganist.

arassment ll girl 'ound him for very two inutes. and Protoganist means they have been the protagonist of the research for a while. Buddha blesses them.

Ike: You lucky bastard.

Yamauchi: You lucky bastard.

Sudo: You lucky bastard.