i stand up carefully while Aidan and Nathan support me, holding my arms while i hold onto them carefully as i walk across the room, "that's it, slowly, Raden!" Jack says as he watches, my ass is sore and so is my dick but they are almost healed properly and i'm high on pain meds too. i feel my legs buckle slightly and the twins hold me up from falling.

"you okay?" Nathan asks and i nod my head, taking a deep breath as i take another step, walking to the other end of the room.

"okay, and your done for today!" he says and i let out a long breath before the twins help me slowly back to the bed, the brought many many duvets to keep me warm, along with my heat packs and the twins, they said that i just need to wait until i can shift and that will fix its self, i have another two week before i'm properly heald. i slowly lay down on my back, bending my legs up so i can lay on my back with less pain to my ass.

Aidan bought me the biggest hoodie in the world for me to wear as trousers put me in too much pain, the hoodies are warm and smell like the twins which i'm happy about. they cover me up, but when i lay like this i'm pretty exposed so i pull the duvet onto me. the twins laying careful next to me, i look up to the ceiling as the twins rub circles over the back of my hands, "who was that guy?" i ask, remembering the first dude who came in and took that thing out of my dick.

"the beta!" they say and i look to them.

"he said it was extremely gorey when he walked in!" Aidan says and i grimice at remembering what it felt like to have that thing in your dick, it almost hurts to think about.

"your dad is really nice!" Nathan says and i nod.

"your a lot like him!" Aidan breaths a laugh, "he seems to have missed you all a lot!" he adds and a tear slips from my eyes.

"but he's back!" Nathan says, holding me softly when i really want them to hug me tightly and warmly, a hug that you know the mean, but it'll hurt like a bitch if they do.

they continue to tell me about different things that i stop listening to, hearing their voices, their calm, beautiful voices are like melodies that send me into a sweet sleep.

i snap away at the pain that rithes through me, i push myself off of my ass and my dick, holding myself above the bed as Aidan and Nathan snap awake, "little red?" Nathan asks, seeing me.

"I'll get the pain meds!" Aidan says softly, getting up, Nathan takes me in his arms, holding me up effortlessly and taking all my body waight, i gasp at the slight pain, any movement gives me as Aidan comes over with three boxes and a bottle of water, he hands me three tablets and i take them, grabbing the water and downing it quickly.

Nathan continues to hold me securly as Aidan holds me too, with the pain slowly going away i slowly fall to sleep in my mates arms.

i wake up the next morning to the smell of bacon, i open my eyes and see mum at the end of the bed holding a tray of bacon and sausage sarneys, my mouth waters and i sit up to go but soon regret it as i flinch at the pain.... the pain now is close to how it felt when i gave birth so i'm coping, but my ass can't decide whether it feels good or bad. she laughs, "i see your getting better!" she smiles and passes me a sarney, i stand up to eat as i still can't sit on my ass, i eat it and watch as the twins wake up to see me gone. they panic a bit before they see me, i smile at them, laughing when i flinch at the movement it causes, to which they laugh back at me.

they get their sarneys and finish before me, "um, a woman is coming in later today to talk about everything that happend!" mum informs and i look to her, turning pale, "a therapist!" she says and i feel sick...

"aren't they a type of doctor?" i ask slowly and she sighs.

"you don't have to talk to her, but i think it's best to talk to someone about everything, it'll help you heal!" she says and i shake my head.

"i am healing!" i retort but she shakes her head.

"physically yes, but mentally-" she trails off and i sigh, understanding.

"i just want this all to go away!" i grumble, "my ass can't decide wether it feels good or bad!" i laugh and so do the others.

"well you need to talk to Jack about that one i'm afraid!" she laughs and i shake my head, feeling full, even tho i have only eaten one half, "Raden, you need to eat it all!" she says and i shiver at the words spoken.

"don't tell me to eat!" i say and drop the sandwich, looking down at it, "i-i-i'm sorry, i didn-" she waves me off.

"it's fine, Raden, i'm sure your apatite with improve the more you get better!" she smiles and rubs my shoulder, "how about i bring some gamon next ti-"

"NO GAMON!" I shout, taking myself by shock at i remember the giant chunk i was forced to eat, i begin to feel sick and rush through to the toilet, throwing up, ignoring all the pain. Aidan and Nathan are by my side in seconds, they rub my back as i stop, sitting up.

"i think you do need to see the therapist, Raden, we'll be there if you want us to!" Nathan says softly as tears stream down my face, i nod to him before they help me back to the room. they help me sit down carefully as i grimice at the pain, but i sit down and the pain slowly subsides.

"i'll talk to the lady!" i say quietly and mum nods.

"she's coming in around two hours so you have time to prepare mentally!" she says softly, "she's a friend of mine too so we know she's safe!" she says and walks out.

"i feel terreble!" i say and they both look to me, "she keeps making me food and i can't get myself to eat it!" i cry and they hug me.

"she doesn't take any of it to heart, it's okay!" Aidan says softly.

"she knows your finding it hard!" Nathan adds and i lean into their soft, gentle, delicate holds.

"before you know it you'll be up and running again!" Aidan says brightly and i smile, looking forwards to it, but something just tells me i wont make it, something will happen to me and i'll not get through to the happiness, that it's not a choice for me anymore.

Jack comes into the room and smiles, "hi, how are you feeling?" he asks and i sigh, i ask him about the ass problem and he stops, "yeah, um, i am afraid i can't do anything about that, sorting it out will just be too difficult and dangerous, he messed around with your nerves, that's harder then trying to rebuild your spine, the amont of pain it would cause, even if we did put you to sleep, youd still subconciously feel the pain!" i look away, remembering the pain i was in and i shiver at it, "which reminds me-" he says, turning to the twins, "if you two want to have sex with him you have to be slow, going fast will probably make him pass out from pleasure!" he laughs lightly as i redden and the twins go slightly pale, "like i said, he messed with his nurves, probably because they knew you two were his mates!" he says softly and they both sadden.

i nudge them both and they look to me, "it's alright, i'm alive, it's not your fault their sick twisted creeps!" i shiver thinking about them. they lean down and kiss me and i kiss back, it's only a short one but i still love it.

the door opens slowly and a woman walks in, "hello, i'm Jane, i'm here to talk with Raden?" she asks and i tense up, holding onto Aidan and Nathan strongly while they squease my hand.

"yeah, the one in the middle!" Jack says and i begin to panic slightly at the thought of seeing a person... with a doctor related job.... talking to me. i shake my head.

"no, i don't want to talk!" i panic but then she sits on the floor by the door.

"i'm staying sat here, there's nothing i can do from this distance!" she says softly and i begin to breath again.... there's nothing she can do sat over there, "so, let's start with some questions, i'm 35, how old are you?" she asks, smiling and i begin to calm down at her kindness.

i open my mouth to answer but nothing... nothing, comes out.

"it's alright, take your time!" she says softly and i let out a breath, i can't get the fact that she's a doctor out of my head, the only doctor i trust right at this moment is Jack because he was there before this happened and he helped me through.

but she's here to help with me mentally, Jack can keep me safe physically, but who knows what might happen if these thoughts get too out of hand... "eigh-" i take a breath, but she's a doctor, she has tighs to all sorts of people and things, tools, medication...Aidan and Nathan's body temperatures heat up and they lean away, making me nervous when they put two heat packs on me, instantly making me calmer, "mmnm, so warm!" i hum and she smiles, Aidan and Nathan moving closer to me.

"so you like warm thing yeah?" she asks and i nod.

"y-yeah!" i answer and she smiles.

"i have a really big family, one daughter and four sons, i have two sisters and four brothers, how about you?" she asks and it kind of makes me feel better that i know a bit about her before she even gets to know anything about me, "do you have a big family?" she asks softly.

i think about all of my pups, my brother, my dad, my mates, "yeah-"i whisper and she smiles.

"do you wanna talk about them for a bit?" she asks and i sigh, laying further back, feeling slightly relaxed and seeing her relaxed like nothing bads going to ever happen makes me feel better.

"i have one older brother-" i say slowly, working up the confidence to speak to her, i shut my eyes to try and clear my head of unwanted rubish, i open them and look at her, Jack is sat on a swively chair doing some work while the twins work on comforting me, "nine-" big step, big step, "nine pups, three girls and six boys-" she smiles at the success, "and then there's these two's mum and dad-" i feel their disapointment at being introduced as these two, but i'm getting there, "they supported me a lot and i just got my dad back, "I smile, taking a deep breath, "and then theres my mates, Aidan and Nathan, i couldn't live without them!" i say, and they both kiss my cheeks.

"they seem to love you very much!" my heart warms knowing that others see it, "how and when did you meet?" she asks and i breath a laugh.

"around just over a year at school, i turned the corner and ran streight into Nathan's chest, i passed out when i realised they were my mates and then ran like a chicken!" i laugh and so do the twins, "but they have saved my life on numerous occasions!" i say, looking between the two.

"oh really, and what were they?" she asks curiously and i sigh.

"well, first was the same day i ran into them, i got home late and they saved me from my mum, even tho i could handle it-" i say, holding their hands tighter, "then there was when i was nearly beaten by Luke, and the time i was beaten by some of Luke's pack members, but we are all good now-" i say, smiling at how much they protect me, i feel some tears run down my face, "then there was when they saved me and my pups from my mum!" she move closer to me, "she kicked me in the stomach and first their dad got her away from me as they were just coming through the door from school, Nathan came to my side while Aidan took care of my mum!" i explain, they wipe away my tears, but i want them to fall.

"they sound like they do a lot for you, huh?" she asks lightly.

"they really do, they protect me as much as they can, they keep me happy, warm, the make sure i eat enough, sleep enough, even tho i'm so fucking stubborn, but they seem to know how to work past that and i don't understand how they do it!" i explain, i breath a laugh through my tears, "i remember when i purswaded them to take me to school with them when i wasn't well enough to go from being pregnant and all and they put blankets and my heat pack in their bags so when i couldn't be out i'd be as comfortable as ever!" i smile and she smiles, "i've always been afraid of-of doctors, and when they took me the first time... it was a disaster and i had to be given two injections to try and calm me down, so while i was asleep they created a little den under the bed for me to curl up in when i was in my fox form and didn't want to sleep on the bed!" i smile, "it's been taken over by the pups now but i love them for everything they do!" i say, crying a bit more, "including this!" i say, leaning against them, "i wouldn't even talk to you if these two weren't here!" i say and she smiles.

"yeah, you seem to love them a lot!" i nod my head.

"i really do!" i say, wiping my tears, "they deal with all of my emotions!" i say dramatically and she laughs lightly along with the others in the room, "i never stop thinking about them, i couldn't let myself stop thinking about them there!" i say slowly, and she smiles.

"yeah, they helped you get through it in memory too then?" she asks and i nod, "and what else did you think about when there?" she asks, keeping on the subject, moving it slowly.

"my pups!" i say, crying some more, "my dad!" i sob and she smiles, sitting patiently, "my other mum and dad!" i breath a laugh and the twins snuggle closer to me, "my big brother!" i say, unable to stop the water works, "i can't stop crying!" i laugh lightly and she breaths a laugh.

"it's alright, take your time!" she says and i do, i take a small moment to collect myself, with the help of my mates.

"i am-" i begin, "i am very greatful for everyone, especially my mates!" i say and she nods.

"i love you!" they both say in usion like always and i breath a laugh.

"i love you both too!" i whisper and kiss them both.