Devon

"So, how's it going with the mate?" Oliver asked in the most obtrusive way possible, straight into my mind to make it impossible to ignore him.

"Did you really just call me away from her just to ask that?"

I glowered at him, only half seriously, but he just raised an eyebrow and smiled as if he couldn't see my expression. Shameless younger brothers.

"Do I look like I have a death wish, Devon? No, patrols reported hunter activity on the northern border."

I narrowed my eyes, furious that the hunters dared skulk around my territory. Were they here looking for my mate? Unlikely, if she was as unimportant as she thought. Additionally, if they believed that we had stolen one of their people, they would begin with the channels laid out in the accords rather than sneaking around the edge of the border. If there was had any evidence that I had done something wrong, they would try to prosecute me through the official procedures, so this was likely some other trouble they were causing.

Likely, they were investigating the death of that piece of shit who had been hurting her. "Have they breached the border?"

"No, not yet. They appear to be intentionally staying outside of it."

I looked across the sea of my people enjoying their leisure time together. "Send out the standby team to reinforce, but try not to cause a panic. This isn't the first time they've been sniffing around, and it's unlikely they'll act. If they make contact, I'll head out there and deal with them. No need to cause more difficulty with the hunters until we have undeniable proof."

"Sounds good, Alpha." He spun around and left. I watched him go and headed back to Amber, only to discover she had disappeared from where I left her.

Had I really believed that she would stay put and wait for me? Just because we were talking now didn't mean that I was making any real headway with her, but her absence still stung. It seemed would take any excuse to stay away from me.

It took me a couple of minutes to locate her amidst the obscuring scents of my pack. She had found a new vantage point that nearly hid her while she watched the pups again, this time as they played some beanbag game one of the teachers had set up. Ignoring my wolf, I decided not to disturb her again, instead I walked the opposite direction, thinking about how much I wanted to kill the hunters who had forced her to adapt her behaviour this way. I almost wished the ones sneaking around the edge of my territory would come inside, so that I would have an excuse to deal with them.

But for the sake of my pack, I would not rush headlong into a new war, no matter how tempting. Tensions with the hunters had already been heightened even before I had found Amber. The disappearance of my sister and her mate had been the final straw that broke the tentative peace of my time as the leader of my pack. Of course, the hunters had outright denied having anything to do with Silvia's disappearance, but my scouts had found evidence at the point the clear trail of their scent disappeared, a button that matched those on the standard hunter uniform. Frustratingly, that still had not been enough to convince a majority at the alpha assembly to stand with Marrowcliff and take action.

With no recourse and few allies, it had taken us more than a year to find a lead on where the hunters might be holding them, and then I had sabotaged the mission by rescuing my mate instead of heading further in to find our missing people. I would do it all over again if I had to, but I wasn't just going to forget that the hunters had my sister somewhere out there.

I left my mate alone until the main evening feast. She looked tense when I sat beside her, but she did not protest. It was impossible to tell if she was pleased to have me there, or if she was stoically enduring the torture of my proximity. The food was served buffet style, so we went up together to fill our plates. Sarah led us as she chattered on and on to Amber about anything and everything. I was more fixated on the fact my mate took very little, as I eyed her small form. She was beautiful, but she had nothing to spare, as if she had been getting by on the bare minimum for far too long. Because I didn't think she would welcome my concern, I resisted the urge to encourage her to eat more, even though my wolf nagged me to take care of her.

It was a relief that she was at least warming up to Sarah. My cousin genuinely liked my mate, and she kept up a steady stream of conversation. Amber didn't talk that much, but at least she was less alone. I wanted to be the one to bring her comfort, but I would take it however I could get it for now.

Even if she didn't give into me in the next three weeks, maybe she would feel comfortable enough that she would at least want to stay.

And what if she didn't?

I couldn't afford to abandon my responsibilities and follow her, especially not with the growing hunter issues plaguing my pack. I scowled to myself, trying to push back my growing panic over the short remaining timeframe and my lack of progress in getting her to warm up to me. I should never have agreed to her terms, but what other choice did I have at the time? Now I was trapped, because I could either honor my promise and let her go, or prove to her she could not trust me to be better than the hunters who had mistreated her.

I was drawn out of my dark thoughts by Amber's giggle. It was short and tentative as if it had escaped against her will, and I turned my attention to what my cousin said that could elicit such a response.

"His arms windmilled while he teetered on the edge of the dock, and with just a little push... Splash!" Sarah said, holding her stomach as she laughed. "His face was priceless, absolutely shocked, as if there was no way I would dare to do something like that to him."

My mate didn't let another sound out, but she kept smiling, wry amusement in her lovely eyes.

"I don't know why he thought he was going to get special treatment. Deltas are no big deal since I grew up related to all the highest ranked wolves in my pack, and it wasn't like he was my mate."

Amber's face lost its smile at Sarah's last word and it was like another spear through my heart. Did she really hate being my mate that much? My wolf pushed again, wanting to take over.

To placate my wolf, I had to try something since my attempt to give her time and space wasn't working. I got up, and walked to the dessert table and grabbed two plates, putting various desserts on them and brought them back to her. "Amber, which do you want?"

She looked at me with wide eyes. "Well, they both look fine."

Most people liked chocolate, so I gambled and put the one with chocolate cake in front of her. She picked up her fork and took a tentative bite, and then another. She liked it, judging from her quiet enthusiasm.

"Thanks," she said, her eyes meeting mine for just a second.

Satisfaction swelled inside me and my wolf felt calmer, at least for the moment.

—————

As the night drew on, I managed to keep Amber beside me without much effort. She appeared more comfortable in my presence when I was not showing her the extent of my interest, so I let other people talk to her and simply stayed by her side.

Darkness fell, and the hunters' near intrusion came to naught. As much as I longed to take out my frustrations on them, I had enough trouble from them already, and there was someone more important I needed to focus on.

The dancing began, and gradually pups were taken off to bed, leaving the adults to continue their celebrations. Amber relaxed further as darkness deepened. Did she feel hidden from the eyes of the werewolves around her? We saw best by the light of the sun, but with aid from the bonfire and the torches, we werewolves could see nearly perfectly.

But she wouldn't be able to, so I took the opportunity to study her without making her uncomfortable. Again I was struck by her beauty, and I didn't believe it was only the bond between us that made me so weak to her. Colours were muted by the dim light, but I had seen her often enough to know that her hair was a rich shade of caramel and her eyes a shining hazel. As she sat there beside me at one of the tables, her wide eyes were both simultaneously watchful yet downcast like always, listening for problems before using her vision only as a last resort.

My temper stirred anew at those who had forced her to learn these behaviours. She should never have needed to be so cautious and withdrawn. She was a luna by destiny and had deserved to be treated as such, not like an unwanted slave. My wolf enhanced my fury at the situation, and I clenched my fists before realizing what I was doing.

I forcibly relaxed. Perhaps I would have my revenge for her suffering while dealing with my other hunter problems, but that was not a satisfaction for this night. Frightening her was the last thing I wanted to do.

My mate was watching the dancing with a far-away expression so I threw caution to the wind. "Would you like to join them?"

She reacted with horror to the suggestion. "No thanks." Her voice was little better than a squeak.

"Of course you don't have to, but why not?" I asked.

"I don't know how, for one."

"I could teach you."

She shook her head. "No, please."

I exhaled my disappointment.

"You can go dance without me," she suggested with an aggravatingly hopeful tone, as if the idea of getting rid of me was something to look forward to.

"There's no point without you."

"Sorry."

"I don't want you to be sorry." I wanted her to be happy, most preferably with me. If she would just give me a real chance, I was sure that I could make her want to be mine, and want to have me in return.

"I can't help it. I just wish I wasn't your mate so that you wouldn't feel so miserable."

I didn't believe that she really understood how much voicing her regret was like a spear through my heart. I closed my eyes and tried to collect myself and keep my wolf from pushing me to do something I'd regret. Every time she tried to get away from him, he only became more determined to chase her down.

I resumed my perusal of the crowd around me while I fought for control. Once I was certain I had regained it, I asked, "If I didn't feel miserable, would you still wish not to be my mate?"

She paused. "Maybe not."

I could have told her that the only reason this situation was so painful was because she resisted our connection, but I didn't want to guilt her any more than I wanted to coerce her. I wanted her to choose me because she wanted me, not out of pity.

Her eyes met mine through the dim light. Her eyes were direct and her lips were slightly parted as if in unconscious invitation. I wanted her so badly I could practically taste what it would be like to finally have her.

"Let me kiss you," I said, my instincts overwhelming my good sense.

Her eyes flicked down as she slipped away, increasing the distance between us. "I don't think that would make this situation better for you."

"Maybe, maybe not." Now that the words were out there, I was willing to gamble that if she just let her guard down, she would enjoy it enough to want more. Physical attraction seemed to be the one guarantee when it came to the bond. "I won't if you say no."

She paused again. "No. I don't want this. I don't want to be here. And I don't want you to kiss me. Ever."

It was as painful as every other rejection she had thrown at me, like each was scraping off a piece of my soul. She was resolute and I had made no progress. All my foolish hopes had come to nothing. She was mine, but she refused, and the fact she didn't want me was the one thing I couldn't ignore.

I could be the monster who held her against her will like the hunters, or I could let her go, because it was the only thing she had ever asked of me. I breathed in deeply while I tried to control my agitated wolf. He was struggling in my mind, desperate to stop my next words. "You can leave."

Her brow furrowed and her eyes clouded with confusion as she blinked up at me. "Leave?"

"The territory. As soon as you're ready to go. Forget the deal. A few weeks won't change anything."

"Oh."

I expected her to be happier. The least she could do was be pleased about my painful self-sacrifice.

I stood up. My wolf howled his dismay in the back of my head, and my nerves prickled, warning me that I wasn't going to be able to prevent my coming shift. My canines ached as if they would mark her here and now. I had to get away from her before my wolf did something unforgiveable, something I could never take back. My voice was strained as I pushed out my next words. "Have a good night, Amber. Inform me when you're ready to leave, and I'll have your travel arranged."

Striding off into the darkness past the tree line, I barely managed to strip off my clothing before my wolf pushed me into my wilder form. I held back my howl as I ran through the forest, away from Amber, because that was the only direction that was safe for her.