When I woke up Rowan was gone.

My head was pounding, the light from the window was all too bright and I shut my eyes again, covering them with my hands. My skin felt clammy and I groaned as the thought of the vodka I'd consumed brought me a wave of nausea. I couldn't throw up here.

I tried closing my eyes again and taking deep breaths. I'd need to pull myself together before I picked up Lucy.

Fuck.

My eyes shot open and I fumbled for the phone I'd left on Rowan's bedside table. I hadn't heard my alarm go off yet and the thought of letting down Lucy on her first day back made me sit up faster than I should've. My head spun and I rested it against the palm of my hand as I checked the time.

7:30

I released a sigh of relief, I still had half an hour to get rid of my hangover. My eyes traveled further down my screen.

I looked and sure enough, there were two bottles of water sitting neatly next to a small bottle of Advil.

I quickly took two capsules and chugged some water, praying my headache would pass quickly. It was silent, there were no loud voices in the courtyard I assumed due to the early hours and the snow that seemed to have fallen after the hail in the night.

My eyes caught a glint of silver on the bedside and noticed what looked like a burrito wrapped in tinfoil. There was a sticky note attached to it with eat! scribbled neatly in black ink.

Despite my unwell state, I felt a small smile cross my face at Rowan's thoughtfulness. I took the burrito, the tinfoil was still warm.

But the thought of food made me feel more nauseous, and I stood up, looking for my coat. Rowan seemed to have thought of that too, as all of my clothes were folded neatly on his desk chair.

Did he even sleep?

***

"Evan!" Lucy ran up to me, her flip-flops smacking loudly against the tile floor at baggage claim. She embraced me in a long, warm hug and I felt a sense of relief wash over me. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you."

I hugged her tightly before she let go, tears in her eyes.

"Are you okay?" I asked, and she nodded quickly brushing them away.

"Yes, I just... ugh. It's been a long semester." I rubbed her shoulder and she smiled, reaching her hand up to mess up my hair.

"You've gotta tell me all about it," I said, trying to duck out of her reach unsuccessfully. "You're wearing a t-shirt and flip-flops in the snow?"

She looked down at her shoes and laughed.

"I couldn't wear snow shoes on the plane. I thought you'd be waiting outside too."

I shrugged off my coat and draped it over her shoulders.

"You're gonna have to hop on my back unless you want frostbite."

"You're such a gentleman."

***

Lucy hopped off my back and heaved her luggage into the trunk, pushing me away as I tried doing it for her.

"Get in the car and get ready to catch me up on everything," she said, shutting the trunk.

I got in the driver's seat and started the car, my mind racing about what I'd tell her.

"So?" She asked after putting on her seatbelt, "give me something juicy."

I laughed, pulling out of the parking lot and begging my mind to come up with something, anything.

"You know same old Omaha. Nothing really changes here," I lied, avoiding looking in her direction. "You probably have a lot more fun stories than I do."

"Sure," Lucy snorted, "fun stories. But I asked you first, so you've gotta give me something."

"Right," I watched the road carefully, "I guess I don't really know where to start..." Lucy adjusted in her seat to face me more clearly, and I exaggerated the look over my shoulder to make a turn on the empty road.

"Start from when I saw you last."

My eyes darted across the road, wishing for once there was at least a little bit of traffic that could justify my distracted demeanor.

"I, uh..." I cleared my throat, my mind was blank. I felt my face warm up slightly,

"Evan, pull over."

"What?"

"Pull over, I can tell you're freaking out."

I glanced at her quickly and forced a smile on my face,

"I'm fine, Luce."

"Look, pull over right here, there's plenty of spots."

I bit my lip and slowly pulled over, putting my car in park before anxiously turning to look at her.

"What's wrong?" Her bright blue eyes were searching, and I looked away focusing on the white skies beyond the front window.

"I don't know," I answered, Rowan's face flashing through my mind.

"Evan, you know you can tell me anything right?" Lucy said, and I felt my throat tighten. "I'd never judge you."

She grabbed my hand and squeezed. My vision blurred a bit and I blinked away the tears that were threatening to spill before looking back at her.

"Ev, if this is about..." She paused and stopped herself. I shook my head,

"No, it's not that." I cleared my throat again, "You saw me at Erik's party over the summer... right?"

Lucy frowned for a moment,

"Yeah... are you stressing about me seeing you with that cute blonde guy?" My face flushed and I looked away again, "Evan, I'm so sorry if I ever gave you the impression that I'd think any different of you for liking a guy."

She did know...

I felt the tears come back, but they were ones of relief. I still have my best friend.

"No, you didn't, that's just..." I sighed, leaning my head back.

"Is there someone else?" I waited, before nodding.

"Yeah." I looked back at her and saw the corner of her lips turning upward.

"Do they have something to do with this cute little note?" She picked it off of the burrito that I'd left on the middle console, and my face flushed. "Or..." she reached over and touched my bright blue shirt. "The fact that you're wearing a Creighton basketball tee the morning after they played?"

"What-?" I looked down at my shirt, my face surely redder than it'd ever been before. "So suddenly you're a detective?"

Lucy smiled, her eyes lighting up with joy.

"Evan, your new friends are all basketball players. I'm sure they have some cute teammates they've introduced you to."

I looked away, relieved with the fact that Lucy didn't care that I was gay but also wondering how the fuck she'd connected the dots so quickly.

"Or... is it someone we already knew?"

I waited a while before slowly nodding, and her jaw dropped a bit.

"It's you and Rowan isn't it?" She said, her smile bigger than I'd seen in a while. I sighed, and let out a small laugh.

"How'd you guess so easily?"

She squeezed my hand before letting it go, brushing her hair aside.

"I saw how he looked at you at that bar. Then how he looked at you after the game we went to with Erik, at the restaurant, at the party, and he followed you out when you left." She paused and gave me a light shove on the shoulder. "And I can kinda tell when my best friend has a crush."

I let out a laugh, my nerves feeling jittery. She didn't care, she didn't think differently of me at all.

"Evan, come here, you've gotta tell me all about it!" She laughed, pulling me in for a tight hug. I closed my eyes and hugged her back, wondering what I'd done to deserve such a good person in my life.

"I will, I promise," I said, after pulling away. "But now that you know about... that, tell me all about Stanford."

Lucy's face fell slightly, and she sighed.

"Come on, it can't be that bad?"

She shook her head, and looked out the window, resting her arms on her knees that were now pulled close to her chest.

"It's not great."

My smile faltered, and I watched her fingers tighten over her wrist.

"Well, how long until you have to go back?"

Lucy shook her head, before turning back to me, bothered.

"Evan, I'm not going back to that shithole."

***

***