"Why were you watching me?" My voice shook as I called out to the stranger.

The man turned, a surprised look on his soft features. His eyes were a dark brown, and they seemed unthreatening. Was I overreacting?

"S'cuse me?" He had an eyebrow raised, and his nonchalant tone made me slightly less confident in my confrontation. But he'd definitely been watching me, and as thoughts of the night before crossed my mind I wanted to know why.

We'd reached the corner of the building, and I brushed aside the memories of the last time I'd been in an alleyway with a stranger.

"You were watching me." The man's eyes flickered away from mine and an annoyed smile crossed his face.

"Yeah." He admitted, his voice a bit higher than earlier. He looked uncomfortable, and his hands curled in his jean pockets.

I felt my cheeks flush, surprised that he hadn't denied it. His eyes turned back to mine in question, waiting for me to get to the point.

"Uh, why?" My tone was much less confident than it'd been a moment ago. The strap of my bag felt heavy on my shoulder and I gripped it tightly while my other hand fidgeted with the hem of my shirt as I realized it was very possible I'd misjudged the situation.

"Ah. I thought that was obvious." His arms left his pockets and crossed as he peered down at me with a hint of humor. I suddenly felt very small. "I was just checking you out. Thought you were cute."

I stared dumbly at him as humiliation slowly crept through my body. He thinks I'm cute? No- he's just deflecting...

"But..." my eyebrows furrowed as I assessed the situation. He was good-looking... the men who tended to target me were usually old, ugly, drunk... "you look familiar..."

He nodded, a small smile appearing at my obvious flustered form.

"Yeah, I saw you at The Max once." I blinked, my memory slowly creeping in. "You seemed sick, rushed off when I asked if you were okay."

He'd been the one who grabbed my hand... said some words I hadn't heard before I left. I'd gone to get fresh air...

"Oh..." I took a step back, my body slightly less tense than it'd been before. "Oh, right."

The breeze that blew against me didn't do anything to cool the heat in my face which only seemed to be growing at the situation I'd found myself in.

"I-uh, I'm not really... looking right now. I mean you're-" I motioned to his body before I could stop myself, "you look good, but... I'm just uh, unavailable." I felt my face redden and averted my eyes, hoping that this entire day was just an odd dream and I'd wake up in a certain someone's warm embrace.

"Well I got that. It's not like I can compete with Rowan Williams."

I gaped at him, wondering how in the world the words I'd just heard had actually been spoken to me.

"What?" My mind was too slow to verbalize any other thought that was running through my mind as it tried to understand how the fuck this man knew about my feelings towards Rowan.

I saw a slight tint appear in his cheeks and in the back of my mind felt some comfort that I wasn't the only one flustered by this conversation.

"You two came to the drive-thru I work at. Few weeks ago."

"Oh." My mind clicked as I realized he'd been there, and I'd known he looked familiar but had been too distracted to figure out why. "Shit. I'm sorry... I didn't realize- I've just been having a weird day- I shouldn't have followed you out here and-"

"Don't worry- it's fine." He was smirking and his hands were back in his pockets. I focused on the small semicolon tattoo on his wrist to distract myself but only found myself wondering if he'd put it there for a specific person or for himself.

"But Rowan and I aren't... we don't have a thing going on just to clear that up." Oh god what if he's told people...

"Ah. You sure about that?"

No.

"What makes you think we do?"

He leaned back against the outer wall, seeming more and more entertained by the second.

"I can tell when someone's mind is occupied."

"Well we're not... you know..."

"It's none of my business so no need to explain anything."

I scratched the back of my head in discomfort, wondering why I'd gotten myself into this situation and how I could've possibly misjudged someone so badly.

I looked at the man in front of me. He was handsome, his light hair mixing with his tanned skin. I should've been attracted to him, I felt like I would've been if I wasn't preoccupied with the thought of how Rowan's arms had fit perfectly around me the night before, how every time he spoke I felt butterflies in my stomach. It was more than physical attraction.

I realized that by even thinking about it I was only proving his point. I took another step back, hoping I hadn't gotten too close and made him uncomfortable.

"Well, I'm sorry... I shouldn't have followed you, I don't even know what to say." The amusement was gone, and his smile was kind, which I certainly didn't feel I deserved after my failed confrontation.

"Don't be- I'm sorry for freaking you out." I abruptly shook my head, his apology wasn't necessary. If I'd been more awake, I probably would've had a mental breakdown right about now, but my mind was already meddling this situation with the memories of the past few days and I took another step back.

"No, no you didn't." I tried returning his smile and gave him an awkward nod, "uh sorry again." He returned my wave and walked away as if I'd never stopped him. I blinked, staring at the space he'd left behind. Did that actually just happen?

The drive home was slow, and I vowed to ditch class next time I ever felt the urge to. Had I always been this spastic?

I noticed the cameras set up on the front porch when I got home, and felt a strong sense of appreciation towards my dad. I wondered how much they'd cost him, and guilt slowly trickled in after.

"Ev, we were waiting for you." As expected, my parents were sitting next to each other on the couch, their demeanors more serious than usual.

"What's up?" I plopped down on the seat next to them, ready to decline whatever solution they'd come up with to my recently erratic behavior.

My mom adjusted in her seat, sending a quick glance to dad before flashing me a soft smile.

"What exactly happened last night? I know you said you had a bad dream, but Evan, I've never seen you so scared in my life." My dad nodded along with her, and I shuffled uncomfortably in my seat.

"I just, I guess I thought I heard something outside." I didn't meet her eyes. I was a horrible liar. "I checked out the window and saw something moving, so I thought it was someone but it was probably just a cat. I don't know, I think I just need to get more sleep. I'm sorry."

"Evan, we've been noticing you've been down lately. I personally think it'd be great to talk to somebody," my dad said, reminding me of what Rowan had told me a while back.

Sometimes, just talking about things will make you feel a little better.

"You know your mom's sister Lisa is great to talk to." My mom shot him a look and he sank back into the couch, regret appearing in his expression.

Aunt Lisa? My heart pounded and I sat up straighter in my seat. Aunt Lisa who sent her own son to conversion camp?

Did they think I was gay? Did they want her to see if that was what was wrong with me? I remembered the calls my mom had had with her after she'd sent Omari away, she'd cried and screamed obscenities at her sister and I'd never seen her so upset. Was it only upsetting when it was someone else's kid?

"Why the fuck would I go see her?" I didn't mind that my voice dripped with venom. They knew she'd robbed me of a best friend. I hadn't heard from Omari since the day in freshman year of high school, the day she'd sent him off and deleted any trace of his online presence.

"No, nobody is suggesting aunt Lisa, that was just the first person who popped in my mind- just because, you know she's a therapist-"

"-What kind of therapist sends their child to conversion camp?"

"You're right and I shouldn't have said that, I'm sorry." My dad did look apologetic, and I looked away from them.

"I don't need a therapist." I said to the wall, and it was easier saying that there than it'd been when I said it to Rowan. They didn't even have the full story, but that was also why they were so freaked out. "I just need more sleep, I'm sorry about last night but I'll start going to bed earlier, everything's okay."

They're just scared... I reminded myself as I stood up. You were literally brandishing a kitchen knife around last night, they don't want you to become some psycho sleep-walking serial killer... That's it.

"Okay, Evan I trust your judgment, just please let us know when something's bothering you. I know you've been hurting lately and I just don't want you to go through anything alone." My mom's tone was warm, and I found it hard to believe she'd ever be upset with my feelings towards another man. But a large part of me still feared the possibility.

I nodded, forcing a smile to the two of them before walking to my room.

In bed, I heard their hushed tones silently arguing, my mom probably shaming him for bringing up Lisa and my dad probably apologizing profusely.

On top of everything, the thought of Omari had lit a flame of fear in me. I wondered what he was doing now. I wondered what they'd put him through, and what his life was like after. I wondered why the fuck my dad would bring Lisa up in the middle of trying to figure out what was going on with me.

Fuck Lisa.

I blindly reached into my bag, hoping to find my book that could take my mind off of it. There's no way they think I'm gay. It was an honest mistake.

My hand instead reached the newspaper I'd forgotten about, and I pulled it out, my thoughts slowly drifting to the way Rowan's brows had furrowed at it, how his demeanor had changed, how his smile had been forced.

I skipped past the coaches' boring predictions, my eyes catching a snippet with Rowan's name.

When asked about his star player, Coach Anderson beams with pride. "I've known Rowan since he was little. That guy has always had a love for the sport, unlike any other person I've seen." With the regular season inching forward, Coach Anderson isn't delusive about where the team's wins come from. "He's the key. He knows it, his team knows it, we all do. Without Williams, we'd probably be bumped a division down." Anderson laughs as he contemplates a season without his star player."I wish that guy could play five years. It's a shame, but we'll have to build a strong foundation when he graduates." When asked if he has any plans for the team in case Williams misses a game or gets injured, Anderson laughs. "That won't happen. We have an agreement Rowan and I," he jokes, still enthusiastic of a potentially undefeated season to come. "He's not going anywhere."

***