Val didn't hesitate to give my number to Tyler, and the dude actually texted me a few days later: 'Hey, Gracie. It's Tyler, Val's friend. I was wondering if you'd like to go out for dinner?'

No casual hang out over coffee.

No late night booty call after drinks.

Tyler had pulled out the big guns right off the bat.

I had to admit—it was unicorn-like behavior in the world of modern dating. After my break up with Craig, I spent a fair amount of time in the online dating pool, and none of my forgettable, disappointing, and, at times, disgusting matches had offered dinner on the first date.

Tyler also happened to message me while I was sitting next to Gray and Stevie on the couch.

Awkward.

So awkward.

Gray noticed my hesitation as I kept re-reading Tyler's message on my phone screen. I couldn't decide whether or not I wanted to meet the guy.

"Everything okay?" he asked.

Crap. He caught me. I debated whether or not to tell him about Tyler.

Or maybe I needed to stew over my decision a while longer?

In a way, I felt like Gray had a right to know if I was going to date again. I'd definitely want to know if he was going to start seeing other women. In case he ended up bringing one of them back to meet Stevie.

Oh, God.

What were the ground rules here?

Other people were, inevitably, going to come in and out of our lives.

Gray and I couldn't stay single forever, right?

I wasn't looking forward to answering this question with Gray, but I felt like it needed to be addressed.

Glancing over, I tested the waters with him. "So, um... Val called the other day."

"Oh, yeah? How's she doing?"

"She's good, but, ah..."

Gray tossed me a funny look. "What?"

"I think... she's trying to set me up with someone. His name is Tyler."

His dark eyebrows rose up.

Gray let out a strained cough as his entire body grew stiff and straight. "Are you... interested... in being set up?"

"Not really," I answered hesitantly, "but a part of me also feels like... maybe... I should give this guy a chance... since Val's been singing his praises like crazy."

He took a long pause.

Gray grimaced. "Are you really on board with this Tyler guy... or are you just bringing this up because I wouldn't kiss you last night?"

He... wouldn't kiss me last night?

I frowned at him. Confused. Concerned. "What are you talking about?"

Embarrassment clouded his features.

In hurried tones, Gray mumbled, "Ah, nevermind. Forget I even said anything."

Suddenly, a snippet of my drunken ramblings flickered through my mind.

If you won't kiss me, then I'm gonna find someone who will...

"Oh, fuck," I groaned, feeling a bit flustered and mortified with myself, "I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean it, I swear. I mean, Tyler has nothing to do with what I said last night—"

"It's fine, it's fine," Gray replied reassuringly. "Don't worry about it. You were pretty tipsy. I totally get it."

I gazed up at him with uncertainty. "Are you sure?"

His finger started tap-tap-tapping away on his lap. "You know, Gracie..."

"Yes?"

Gray took in a deep breath before continuing, "As... awkward... as it'll be for me to watch you date other guys, maybe, it wouldn't be a bad idea for you to go out with... Tyler. You've been cooped up with Stevie for months. You deserve to live a little."

My eyes went wide.

Was Gray giving me his blessing to go on a date with another guy?

Why wasn't he acting jealous at all?

And why the hell did his lack of jealousy bother me so much?

I couldn't help glaring at him.

Sullenly, I huffed, "What if I don't wanna go out with Tyler?"

Gray averted his gaze. "Well, whenever you feel ready, I think... it might be good for you... to meet some other people."

His words felt like a slap in the face. Like he was breaking up with me or something. My emotions spiraled into a mess. I struggled to understand why I was having such a strong reaction.

We weren't together.

He wasn't my boyfriend anymore.

Still, I gasped like an outraged girlfriend, "What the fuck, Gray! How can you even say that? Knowing what we've been through in the past few months?"

Slowly, he turned back to look at me.

His handsome face appeared pained. "Believe me, it's killing me to be the bigger person here, Gracie. There's nothing I want more than to have you all to myself, but that would be so fucking unfair to you. Especially knowing what I've put you through in the past few months. You deserve a chance to figure out what will really make you happy. Whether it's through your writing. Or being with some other lucky fucker. Without me standing in your way."

Thick, anguished emotions clouded the air as our gazes locked.

I didn't understand how everything Gray had flung at me could feel so sweet and bitter at the same damn time. It made me want to melt. It also made me want to weep.

Stevie seemed to pick up on our bad vibes. She literally started to cry. I picked her up from the playmat and started walking around the room, cuddling her, in an attempt to soothe her mood. Stevie quieted down within a few minutes, but I still felt the tension between Gray and me.

My mood had yet to be soothed.

Out of nowhere, a flashback surged in me.

I was scared that... I wouldn't be able to treat you... right. At the time, I thought you might be better off with... Craig.

As I placed Stevie back on the playmat, an irrational surge of anger burst alongside my memory of Gray's words.

Was Gray looking for an easy way out again?

I took a moment to calm my senses.

God, what was wrong with me?

Why was I even thinking this way?

I shouldn't want him to stay and fight for me!

I was supposed to be fighting for my own happy ending!

Yet, years-old resentment hurtled out before I could curb my tongue, "This is exactly how you've always been, Gray! You say that you care about me! But you're too scared to stay and see things through until the end!"

Stevie wailed again at my outburst. This time, Gray took her in his arms to comfort her tears.

His jaw ticked as he bounced Stevie on his lap. "This is my way of staying and seeing things through until the end, Gracie!"

This scene felt so ridiculous. I knew we shouldn't be fighting in front of the baby, but my emotions were running too high. I couldn't seem to contain myself.

"Bullshit," I muttered as I threw some more shade in Gray's direction, "you probably wanna say that I'll be better off with Tyler, don't you?"

"I wasn't gonna say that about Tyler, okay? I don't even know the guy. I obviously made the wrong call with Craig. But I know you deserve someone who can give you the moon. The sun. The whole damn sky."

To Gray's credit, he had kept his tone serene and steady. It appeared to help Stevie calm down as well as he held her in his arms.

I tried to get a word in, "I—"

Gray wasn't done, though, "In case you can't tell, I'm still a goddamn mess. I can barely sleep at night. I hate myself for what I've done to you. I hate my dad for what he's done to my mom and me. For years, I was so fucking scared that I was gonna turn into my dad—"

This was news to me.

"Wait," I interrupted as surprise filled my expression, "you were scared of turning into your... dad?"

Gray nodded slowly, looking ashamed. "Yeah..."

I was scared that... I wouldn't be able to treat you... right.

As his words replayed themselves in my head, a whole new layer of meaning emerged from what he left unsaid.

"Fuck," I cursed softly. "Is that why you left all those years ago? Because you were scared that you might hurt me? Like... physically?"

He nodded again. Silent. Stoic.

My anger wavered. It was replaced by a sadder, softer emotion. "Oh, Gray..."

In a subdued voice, he sighed, "I'm in no shape to be with anyone's anything right now. All I wanna figure out is how to be a good father to Stevie. I want to change, though. So fucking bad. Maybe, by the end of all of this, I'll finally become a better man. Maybe, by then—"

Gray stopped himself there.

Anxiously, I prompted. "By then—what? What? What!"

"I'll tell you when the time is right," he said mysteriously, maddeningly.

I felt a sense of despair. "Today's not the day?"

"Definitely not today," Gray confirmed.

"You're the fucking worst," I growled under my breath.

He had the audacity to smile at me, all sad and tragic-like, with Stevie cooing on his lap. "I know."

A part of me wanted to hate him for pushing me away once more, but I didn't have the heart to direct such a dark, vengeful emotion towards him. Because I could grudgingly understand where Gray was coming from. He had spoken with his whole chest moments ago. He craved the same things I wanted for myself: A chance to find happiness.

Underneath all of my hurt and resentment, I wanted Gray to find happiness, too. To overcome his night terrors. To make peace with his childhood trauma.

In the story that I had only begun to write for myself, I wanted both of us, Gray and me, to find our happy endings. Together. Or apart. I was beginning to see Val and Gray's point. Whether it was in the realm of the professional, personal, or romantic, I needed to put myself out there to figure out what I really wanted in life.

The next day, I replied to Tyler and accepted his dinner invite.