《How to Write Stories People Will Love》Question 21: Narrating dialogue
Advertisement
asks: Can you write about narrating dialogue? Things like, "he said" or "she nodded" or just describing actions.
Narrating dialogue can be tricky because it's easy to become repetitive or annoying. There's nothing wrong with "he said" and "she said", but when that's all there is, the repetition stands out. And not in a good way.
When narrating dialogue, your goal should be to make it feel like natural, uninterrupted flow. Anything that confuses, annoys, or slows down a reader should be minimized if possible. Like these:
Don't get me wrong. I'm a big fan of complex vocabulary, and I love learning new words. But the word needs to fit the occasion. If you're going to talk about "pulchritudinous splendor", make sure the character using this phrase would actually say such a thing when describing something.
"He asked" is a dialogue tag. So is "she said", "Sally quipped", and "the man roared." Every line in the dialogue does not need to have one. Their purpose is to eliminate confusion. Use them anytime it's unclear who's speaking, but don't underestimate the intelligence of your reader. When only two people are talking, you can get away with no tags at all for expanses of dialogue. This makes for a snappier conversation. Just pop one in every now and then to remind the reader who's turn it is to speak. Like this:
"What do you mean I'm off the team?" Jane asked the captain.
"The team had a vote."
"About me?"
"Yes."
"What did I do?"
"It's more about what you didn't do."
Jane sighed. "And what did I not do?"
"Play like you're on a team."
Many of the dialogue tags can be replaced with actions. This does double duty of preventing excessive tags, as well as giving the reader a better idea of what the scene looks like in their imaginations. Example:
Advertisement
Danny stomped ahead, steam practically puffing out of his hears as he dragged his little brother along by the hand.
Jane ran up to him. "Danny, wait! Don't be mad."
He whirled around. "Why shouldn't I be mad? You just insulted my brother."
"I didn't mean to."
"She didn't mean to," Elton echoed before sticking a thumb into his mouth.
Danny ignored him. "But you shouldn't have said those things."
"I know."
"Then why did you?"
Elton tugged on his brother's hand. "Hungry."
Jane looked at the little boy. "I'm sorry, Elton."
His little face lit up. "French fries?"
---
In this way, it feels like an actual scene rather than some heads talking.
Advertisement
- In Serial222 Chapters
Pokemon: Master Of Tactics
If Alex ever got the chance to get transmigrated into a world, he would choose Pokemon World. Since it is relatively safe. It is easy to earn money. Not to mention, such an adventurous and intriguing world. But when his wish somehow came true, he regretted it.
8 3613 - In Serial12 Chapters
Warlord 6
Five hundred years after ninety percent of the western continent was swallowed by the five human warlords who lead the demon swarm upon earth, a girl is orphaned at a young age, left alone on a small peasant city on the remaining coastal land of the western continent. She fought for every inch of her life everyday and everynight. Then one day, I army showed up to the city, and burnt many buildings to the ground. The girl was caught in the middle of this, was caught by one grand soldier, guarded by many others, this soldier was the king of the men. She tried running from him, but could not escape the guards. Little did she know where this would lead.
8 131 - In Serial23 Chapters
M I S D E E D
Symone and Symere's parents ran a drug business. They were well respected and feared. One night someone looking to take that title takes their life. What will happen to Symone and Symere? Read and find out.
8 91 - In Serial24 Chapters
Madara x Oc
Like the title says this is about Madara Uchiha.. the ultimate badass :3 I don't own anything in Naruto but I do make up some pretty cool characters... I hope you enjoy the book!
8 216 - In Serial27 Chapters
Lucy and Wendy's pain
When Lisanna came back from the "dead" everyone has been treating Lucy and Wendy like their ghost. But something made them want to quit the guild. What will happen to the angels of Fairy Tail~DISCONTINUED~
8 163 - In Serial48 Chapters
Looed and Lost You
(I'm in the process of rewriting this book! The new version is called "Bubblegum and Blood Roses"! But please feel free to still read this one! The plots are different!)Even at a small age, Cansas Walker knew she was different. She was the little girl at school with a knife collection. Being the youngest in a family of hunters can be hard, especially when both your big sisters only fight with each other. But when Cansas starts making things happen an Archangel of the Lord saves them from the demons that mean to kill them. This Archangel stays with Cansas until she turns nine years old. He leaves breaking the little girl's heart, but her life went on. Everything seemed to be back to normal until the demon Quinn kills her mother and father. Both her big sisters go off on their own leaving Cansas in the care of their family friends, the Winchesters. They took care of her until she was old enough to go off on her own. Now at the age of twenty-one, Cansas finds herself on a hunt with the Winchester boys that brings her close to a certain Trickster. Cansas life seems to be spiraling downward as she learns the truth about herself, But with the looming threat of the apocalypse, she must be stronger than ever to take on the great pain that comes with loving and losing an Angel of the Lord. -I don't own anything except my OCs. -Seasons 2-5 with some other characters from later seasons-Character may be a mary sue but she is my mary sue
8 143

