《Father, Mother Escaped Again/父皇,母后又翻墻了!》Chapter 1
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"Leftover woman" is a derogatory term for a unmarried woman, who usually has higher education and is over 27. Ironically, due to the gender imbalance caused by the one-child policy and selective-sex abortions, there are probably more "leftover" men than women.
A beautiful young woman's face was reflected in the cool surface of the copper mirror. She had shapely eyebrows and snow white skin; glossy brown eyes with cat-eye pupils; long, eloquent lashes that fluttered like butterfly wings.
Xia Yuqing would normally be all over such eye candy, but she'd lost all appetite since discovering that this stranger's peerless face was attached to her own body.
Trans, transmigration?! Xia Yuqing's new eyebrow twitched at the beautiful but expressionless reflection. Looks like her natural poker face made the journey with her!
Xia Yuqing was a 21st century shut-in and a fujoshi, and a dutiful student in her youth. In her spare time, she liked browsing forums, watching sometimes immoral flicks, as well as reading porn when she felt like it. But she never committed an atrocity that would warrant being smote by lightning!
Gazing at her unfamiliar reflection, Xia Yuqing recalled the moments before she lost consciousness. She had been cradling her beloved laptop as a certain Internet god uploaded some very realistic yaoi. Because of the excessive stimulation, she couldn't contain the nosebleed that erupted and donated everything to the LCD screen.
This is where everything tumblered into the abyss. She unintentionally dug her own grave by knocking off a cup of water while rummaging for tissues. It splashed onto the charger and following a crackling noise and a scorched scent, lightning suddenly struck from outside her window...and then everything faded to black. Afterwards, she had woken up in this godforsaken place.
Aaaaaah! Xia Yuqing cussed up a storm inside. Damnable transmigration! Return my comfy stay-at-home rotten lifestyle! Return my high-tech computer! Return my matchless R18 erotica!
Her handmaidens collectively shivered as Xia Yuqing idled over the mirror for ages, her expressionless face darkening and the surrounding air progressively stagnating.
A girl dressed in yellow was jostled forward. "Princess..." she mumbled, rousing their mistress who'd been behaving strangely since waking up this morning.
She quailed under Xia Yuqing's cold gaze.
"What is it?" Xia Yuqing snapped, still pissed.
The poor girl was almost scared to tears. Wasn't she supposed to be a feeble-minded and naïve princess? But after waking up she'd done a 180; was it because of the incident this morning?
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"Pr-Princess, today is your wedding day... The emperor traditionally spends the night here. Aren't any arrangements required?"
Xia Yuqing started. Only now did she look down and notice that she was wearing a red wedding gown; this finally rang a bell in her head. Her host body's identity was that of an unfavored, mentally retarded princess who'd been drafted as a substitute bride by her elder sister in a marriage to another country.
Wait! "Wedding?" "Spend the night?" Xia Yuqing's eyeballs rolled back, as if fried by lightning once again.
An old leftover woman like Xia Yuqing might have had countless youthful fantasies in the past, but in the end, she was still a pure fujoshi who'd never even held a boy's hand! Now she was suddenly someone's wife.
Was she going to suffer consummation on the very first day after transmigration?!
...
The flickering candlelight in the splendid palace illuminated the intricate scenery carved on the columns. It was breathtakingly beautiful.
Xia Yuqing stood in the middle of the palace foyer. Facing the fluttering red divider, she recalled the palace eunuch's instructions.
"Milady, this is Sweet Spring Palace, the imperial concubines' bathhouse. Please enter first and await the emperor."
"Enter first and await the emperor?" Do you expect me to bathe and then beg to be pushed down? No freaking way!
Xia Yuqing buried her face and wept silently. She was a respectable, modern woman who'd rather die than stand this humiliation! She'd planned to go down fighting, but this resolve was merely a paper tiger before authority. The result of resistance was to be delivered like pizza.
Forget it, nothing will come of worrying so much. Perhaps by the time I'm done washing, this emperor fellow will have divorced me!
Xia Yuqing comforted herself. She took a deep breath and walked towards the red curtains.
"Hm?" Xia Yuqing's hand stopped about a foot away from the curtain. Was there a noise just now? Could it be that there be other concubines inside?
Xia Yuqing's eyes shone; she practically ripped the curtains open. In the next moment...
Murmuring water flowed from the mouths of four golden animals on each side of the bath, inundating the air with mist. Before Xia Yuqing, two long-haired beauties were embracing in the bath. From her angle, she could only see the woman's snow white back as she straddled her partner.
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"Swoosh—" Without any warning, an arrow of blood was shot. The dripping blood soon contaminated half the bathwater.
The long-haired beauty riding on top heard this noise and turned around, revealing a devastatingly beautiful face exquisitely flushed like a peach with heat. But more importantly, this maneuver had exposed her bosom... which was SUPER flat!
"Swoosh—" Yet another spurt of blood. Xia Yuqing staunched her nosebleed with an embroidered handkerchief in a flurry. Her eyes were glued to the pair the entire time.
Yaoi, hot spring, beauty, and even the riding position! Could my current luck be the legendary..."cheat" ability?
"Looks like a bold little cat broke in. Er, why does she have a nosebleed?" The beauty cracked a soul-stealing smile.
Xia Yuqing was hypnotized. Ah, he's not only beautiful but also sweet-sounding. Who on earth could make such a beauty take the top position... Xia Yuqing peered at the person squashed underneath.
Because of the steam and his body position, she had been unable to see the man's face clearly. But now he turned leisurely, as if sensing her gaze.
"Swoosh—" A third wave of blood cells defected, responding to the siren call of gravity and gurgling down the drain to the distant ocean and was no more.
The man squatting in the bath was incredibly hot. He had long, loosely arrayed hair and long eyebrows over sly, seductive eyes. His slender arms were propped against the nephrite bath rim. Willful and tempestuous, languid yet dangerous. Even from the distance she could feel the haughty aura emanating from him, an aura that seemed to say that even casually squatting down, the world would still fall into his hands.
HE-HE'S A SINFUL SUPER SEME! A screech like a wolf's howl erupted from the depths of Xia Yuqing's heart. Her eyes practically glowed as she goggled at the man in the bath.
"Amazing, look at how huge her eyes are. Is she scared or something?" Yan Ran smirked and stood, running a hand through his waist-length hair. He clapped a Feng Tingye's.
Feng Tingye slapped the vulgar paw off his shoulder. He leaned into Yan Ran's ear and sneered, "I don't ever recall you being so talkative. Was your brain damaged by those hidden weapons? That girl's a princess from the State of Xia."
"The princess of Xia? Your new concubine?" Yan Ran asked in astonishment. He'd been amused by her eyes.
Xia Yuqing held her nose in a choke hold to prevent it from spraying uncontrollably again.
Go-for-it! Go-for-it! Looks like you aren't just a beautiful uke, but an aggressive one to boot! But harassing your seme like this, are you ready to be punished until you can't get out of bed?
"Tingye, why do I feel like she's leering at us?" Yan Ran was chilled by Xia Yuqing's eyes. He dressed uncomfortably with the clothes by the bath. "Forget it, we've finished already. I'll leave first, so you two can go enjoy yourselves."
Xi Yuqing was in a trance as she fantasized about the pair's relationship, when the delicate beauty dressed and left the bath, heading her towards her.
"Kitten, make sure to service our emperor well. I'll hit you up later~" He even rubbed her cheeks a bit while saying this.
Xia Yuqing turned beet red. Was I just sexually harassed? Gorgeous, you've got this all wrong. How can you be flirting in front of your seme?! ...Wait, did you just say "emperor"? No way...
Feng Tingye sat at the edge of the bath, sizing up the bug-eyed intruder who'd almost ruined his plans with narrowed eyes. He was somewhat irritated as she ogled Yan Ran with those puppy-dog eyes.
The princess of Xia was his concubine, yet she dared to blatantly eye other men! Was she either brainless or simply that lecherous?
Xia Yuqing heard a crash behind her and was just about to turn around when someone seized her chin. She was unable to extricate herself as a blindingly handsome face entered her view.
"Seen enough yet?"
Xia Yuqing dazedly stared at the handsome face approaching hers. She froze, realizing what she'd done. Daring to ogle his cute little uke in front of him; what was the phrase for this? You're courting death!
Xia Yuqing swallowed hard, hastily shaking her head then hastily nodding instead.
Feng Tingye narrowed his eyes. "You still haven't had enough?"
"I've had enough, really!" Xia Yuqing retreated while nodding furiously. Like hell she didn't want live anymore! The Great Seme's possessiveness was too damn scary!
"Really?" Feng Tingye looked at her in askance. His lazy voice was acutely provocative. "Then tell me... What did you see?"
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