Dearest Reader – Are you familiar with that feeling you get when one minute you're standing on a perfectly solid surface and the next you're sinking into quicksand?

No?

What about the horrible sensation you get when you're perched at the edge of a diving board, and someone sneaks up behind you and bounces, and you fall and hit the water with a huge belly flop?

No?

Okay, here's a good one: You're balancing on the fulcrum of a teeter-totter when a meteor streaks through the sky, lands on one end, and your teeter-totter totters.

Seriously? None of these examples of a shifting reality have happened to you? Consider yourself lucky.

Then all I can suggest is you try to imagine the feeling then. Your beloved author can only come up with so many poetic and applicable analogies before she has to get back to telling the actual story.

Anywho, Ashley experienced that exact instant shift in her reality upon the realization of the following:

1. Her stepsister, Druscilla, was a shapeshifting magician and the daughter of The Not-so-marvelous Marvelous Marveloni. These facts alone would take an eternity for Ashely to unravel.

2. Druscilla, the cruel and twisted stepsister Ashley thought she'd escaped forever, had been at the castle since she married Charming, pretending to be a lady-in-waiting and then Princess Blanche.

3. Her evil Stepmonster had had sex with Marveloni! (The image of her stepmother—a woman partial to high necked blouses, corsets, and skirts with enough fabric to adorn the windows of an entire castle—partaking in horizontal refreshment with the creepy one-eyed magician, implanted itself Ashley's mind and grew like poison ivy on a stone wall.)

Ashley's knees shook, legs threatening to buckle. The fact that she hadn't eaten in a dragon's age, her muscles had been overworked to the point of exhaustion, she'd been nearly frozen and buried in an avalanche, had a harrowing flight on a couple of dragons, and her skin was as chafed as a baby's wet bottom, didn't help her capacity to deal with life-altering news.

What she needed was a hearty meal, a long nap, and a severe case of amnesia. Ignorance was bliss, after all. But since none of that seemed to be on the table, Ashley crossed her arms over her chest, girding herself to withstand this unexpected rendezvous with her lifelong tormentor.

Druscilla's tongue flicked out of her mouth, licking her red (non-chapped) lips.

Ashley stepped back in terror, waiting for the inevitable strike. It's incredible how, when confronted with the past, one falls into old patterns. But Ashley was no longer a kitchen maid, covered in ash, friendless, nothing more than a thorn in her family's side.

That girl no longer existed. The woman she was now had confronted far greater adversaries than a magician-in-training. She'd faced an entire coven of experienced witches, ice elves, avalanches, a troll, dragons, and a super-annoying unicorn-groom nee knight, who at this moment was beside her, head cocked as if trying to decide whether she needed him to step in and be all gallant. Ashley answered him by straightening her spine, balling her hands into fists, and scowling at her stepsister. "Trust me, 'sis,' I didn't drop in on purpose. And no one will be exterminated. If you hand over the egg now." Ashley held out her hand.

Druscilla cackled. And cackled some more. "I'm getting good at this cackle thing. I might enter the Interkingdom Villain Cackle Contest at the Games this year. I think I have a shot. Listen." She cackled harder, then began to choke on her cackles, which devolved into a coughing fit that sounded like the barking of a strangled sea lion. What had caused this reaction? Asthma? Too many toxic fumes in the lair? Excessive cackling practice? Unhealthy lifestyle? All of the above? Perhaps she'd asphyxiate herself and put them all out of their misery. 'Death by cackle' would be a fitting end.

But given that Dru's death didn't seem imminent, and in the meantime, the egg jiggled precariously in her grasp, Ashley had to take action. "Um, let me take the dragon spawn off your hands," Ashley said, gliding forward to rescue Junior.

"Stay back," Druscilla warned between coughs.

Ashley halted, held her breath, and prayed for Junior's safety, while Ruth whined, pacing across the snow, whipping her tail like a rattlesnake, as she blasted the air with fire, not daring to flame Druscilla for fear she would drop the egg.

"Don't worry, Ruth," Derek said. "We'll get Junior back."

Ashley translated Derek's assurances to the dragon to calm her down before she flamed someone by accident.

"It will be difficult," Ruth said, voice shaking. "Druscilla may be a novice, but all she needs to do to wreak untold havoc is open her big mouth and utter a powerful-enough incantation."

"She can't incant if she's choking to death," Ashley offered hopefully.

"Perhaps, but thank that hot prince for his gallantry anyway," Ruth added politely.

"What'd she say?" Derek asked.

"She said thank you," Ashley explained to Derek.

"And what else?" Derek said.

"Nothing. That was the gist," Ashley said.

"You sure?"

"Okay, fine," Ashley snapped. "She called you a 'hot prince.'" As if Derek didn't have a big enough ego already.

Derek flipped his hair. "Thought so."

Sadly, Druscilla did not expire. Black tears streaked from her eyes and sizzled on the snow like acid. Could that be a side-effect of dark magic, or did she need to switch her brand of mascara?

Recovering from her coughing fit, Druscilla stomped her foot in the snow, seeming to think this would get everyone's attention. Unfortunately, as all of us know who have tried snow-stomping as an attention-seeking tool, it's not as impressive as stomping on marble, broken glass, or a wasp's nest. "Hello! Eyes on me me me. I have sooooo much to rub in about how I've outsmarted you at every turn." Ashley opened her mouth to say something in response, but words failed her. "Much better. As long as no one makes any sudden move or tries to flame anyone, and by 'anyone,' I mean me, Junior will live. I can't say no harm will come to him as he will, of course, be subjected to experiments and daily blood draws, which I'm told can be pretty painful. Oh, the sweet sound of suffering."

"She's a gruesome whoreson," Derek swore, eyes protruding—pupils mere pinpricks within bright green irises. He bared his teeth, and a line of drool leaked from the corner of his mouth. Ashley had never seen him this angry, even when forced to climb up a filthy chimney knowing there wouldn't be a bathtub, stocked with premium hair products, available on the other end.

Dru gave Derek the once-over and licked her red lips. "The green prince is so cute when he's angry. I might need to do a few experiments on him too." She wriggled her eyebrows. "In the interest of science."

"Trust me, sis," Ashley said, "science is not interested in Derek."

"Hey," Derek complained. "Ruth begs to differ. Right, old girl?"

Gerald translated for the dragon, who responded by taking a flying leap in front of Derek, glaring at Druscilla, and clawing the air as if to demonstrate how much she wanted to shred Dru into snack-sized strips. Not only was Ruth furious about her egg, but now she also appeared to be protective of Derek.

"Better be careful, lass," Terrowin said. " I think Ruth here intends to have ye fer her supper. She's partial to her offspring and our greenie prince here."

"Why you're nothing but a bully," Layyin said. "Pleeeeeaaaseee let me toss her over the side of the mountain."

"All in good time, dearest," Terrowin said.

"That's because Ruth here has good taste," Derek said, stepping out from behind Ruth, patting her scaly rump as he passed.

"I'll bet she tastes good," Druscilla drawled. "Like chicken."

"Rawrrrrrrrrrr," Ruth roared, surging onto her hind legs and straightening to her full pine-tree height. Ruth flamed the snow in frustration, creating a small lake, while glaring daggers at Druscilla.

"Stop melting the snow!" Dru said. "You're going to ruin my circle."

"What circle?" Kai said. "Does anyone else see a circle?"

"I don't see a circle," Sadira corroborated.

"Never mind," Druscilla snapped. "Now, where was I?"

"No one tell her," Gerald said. "I was already bored."

"Me too," Layyin said. "She's more monologue than magic."

"A few more minutes of rejuvenation, and I'll show you some magic," Druscilla boasted.

"Why not show us now, before we all die of boredom?" Derek suggested.

"Silence!" Druscilla said. "Or I will drown you in fire ants after I kill you, of course. Killing first. Drowning second."

Druscilla clearly had a few bats in her belfry, a fruitcake in her pantry, and lacked some necessary screws. While Ashley had plenty of experience with her family members being "cruel," "demanding," or "just plain mean," "outright insanity" wasn't in her wheelhouse.

She knew enough about dealing with standard erratic adversaries to understand that one wrong move could result in an unsustainably-wide separation of one's head and neck. But when said erratic adversary possessed magic, the outcome could be worse than a straightforward beheading. "Derek," she hissed out of the side of her mouth. "Did you, by any chance, study psychology in all that education you bragged about?"

"I did not brag."

"Did too," Tressa said.

"He did," Gerald agreed.

Derek pursed his lips at Tressa, turned toward Ashley, and hissed back: "Fine. I recommend no sudden moves, don't call her crazy or unhinged, and definitely don't ask her if she's having her monthlies."

"Excuse me?"

He shrugged. "My mom used to go crazy when my dad asked her that."

"Can't blame her," Kai said.

All the princesses nodded.

"What are you mumbling about over there," Druscilla shrieked. "I told you. Eyes on me. Whatever, it's time for us to go."

"Go where?" Ashley said.

Druscilla laughed maniacally. "I loathe snow. It will be way more enjoyable to deliver my victory monologue in a locale with lower odds of succumbing to frostbite. Plus, I can hardly kill you here," Druscilla said, shivering. "So barren and a devastating lack of coffins. If future generations are going to remember my story, choosing the right venue for any evil deed is imperative. Now, what was that relocation incantation?" She poked her chin with a forefinger.

Ashley, however, was hung up on the word 'Coffins.' Her empty stomach pitched. Hadn't they done enough on this quest to earn a short vacation from certain death? When they got back to Ever After, right after the children were returned safely to their families, she'd have to look into creating a questers' union, addressing the excessive hours, lack of food, unsanitary working conditions, and unreasonable volume of lethal obstacles.

The bright side of knowing that they wouldn't be killed in the snow meant that all Ashley had to do to avoid Druscilla's murderous plot was to stay away from the coffin zone.

Which would require snagging the egg, capturing Dru, and covering her mouth before she could utter any magical incantations. The added benefit of preventing Dru from articulating meant they could avoid her victory speech, which was sure to be self-aggrandizing and totally expositional. It was twelve-to-one right now, and Ashley had the armed guards, who presently stood at attention, in a circle surrounding the royals. She'd need to snatch the egg and then have the guards subdue Druscilla fast.

"Can we forget the monologue?" Ashley said, inching closer to Dru and winking at Gerald, who arched an eyebrow in seeming confusion, then winked back. There went the theory that he could read her mind. Jerking her chin toward Druscilla, Ashley gestured with a horizontal hand slicing across her neck. He raised another eyebrow. Ashley sighed.

Druscilla glowered. She was good at glowering as it was her go-to facial expression. "Look at me! I call the shots. You've always been a pain in my arse. Imagine how difficult it was for me to pretend to be your lady-in-waiting when I am the actual princess. Agony."

"You are a princess?" Derek said. "Like princess of the underworld? Princess of all that's unholy? Princess of darkness? Princess of narcissistic personality disorder? What? I did study a little psychology, okay?"

"Maybe I'm not royal yet. But I will be. Daddy promised."

"Where is "Daddy?" Ashley said, eyes sweeping the magician-free snowy expanse, slowly slowly creeping toward her sister.

"He's tending to important details for the Interkingdom Games. Where I shall be introduced to all the seven realms as the one true princess. It will be my moment of triumph!"

So many questions sprinted through Ashley's mind that she couldn't speak. They were all crucial, but her tongue contorted. It turned out to be physically impossible to ask more than one question at a time.

But like there's a perfect place to commit murder, there's also an ideal time for questions. This was not it. Right now, Ashley's job was to de-egg Druscilla and quell her voice, not encourage her with more questions.

Speaking of voices, why hadn't it occurred to Ashley earlier that she could communicate to Gerald in Dragon or Unicorn or Mosquito, and no one else would understand? "Gerald?" Ashley said in Dragon.

"Yes?"

"Could you and the men surround us, and when I give the signal, attack Druscilla and gag her? I'm going for the egg?"

"Do you think that's wise?" Gerald said.

"What are you two rawring about?" Druscilla said. "Quiet. How. Many. Times. Do. I. Have. To. Say. It?"

"I guess we should discuss the 'whys' later?" Gerald responded in Dragon.

"Might be better that way," Ashley said, sidling next to Druscilla, grabbing Junior, whose shell was as hot as a hardboiled egg straight from the pot. "Ouch!"

"Junior!" Ruth cried.

Druscilla screamed. "Give me back my dragon!" She lunged for Ashley, dragging her into the snow.

"Toss it here," Derek called.

Ashley tossed. "It's hot," she warned as Derek caught it.

"Come on, boys," Gerald ordered, raising his sword. The others followed suit. They rushed inward, but before they got even close, Druscilla cried "repelloroni." Why was her evil stepsister yelling about pasta at a time like this?

A strange dome of shadow appeared, encircling the royals ?? and Ashley and the other Princesses? All at once, the men hit the shadowy barrier and fell to the ground, screaming in pain.

Ruth roared, but the sound was muffled. She flew over the circle, and dove, hitting the barrier, then bouncing off, and twirling away like a kite ensnared by an erratic wind.

"We canna get closer," Terrowin said, his voice also muted.

Ashley bit Druscilla's arm. She screamed, and Ashley used the diversion to escape her sister's clutches and run for Gerald. If he couldn't get in, maybe she could get out. Her shoulder exploded in pain as if she'd hit a brick wall. She spun on Druscilla. "What have you done?"

Druscilla grinned, evilly. "Simple repel spell. It's for the best. I only have enough coffins for the royals. I may be a bloodthirsty killer, but I'm not a savage. Everybody I exterminate gets a coffin. You get a coffin, and you get a coffin, and you get a coffin, and you get a coffin, and you get a coffin, and you get a coffin." She pointed to each of the royals who were inside of what must've been a magical dome of shadow.

Gerald threw himself repeatedly at the barrier. "I want a coffin too," he bellowed. Bile rose in Ashley's throat at the thought of Gerald in a coffin. If he ended up in a coffin, they might as well put her in one too.

"Didn't I just say I didn't have enough?" Druscilla roared.

"I don't need a casket. Just let me in."

"No can do. Not worth the magical energy. If you layman had any clue what is involved in a magic spell, you'd appreciate my prowess. But no, you assume I can whip people around dimensions willy-nilly."

"I'll show you prowess," Gerald said.

"You can show me," Derek suggested, suggestively. Even at a time like this, Derek didn't let a flirting opportunity slide.

"How cute. The liddle knight is a'blustering. Anyway, I have the Interkingdom Games to get to, a prince to marry, and seven kingdoms to take over. I've waited so long for this moment."

"I'm not marrying you," Derek spat. "Sorry, you're not my type. I don't go for venomous shrews."

"Not you! Ugh. Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Druscilla stomped the snow a little too forcefully, which caused her to fall flat on her behind. Everyone laughed, which resulted in Druscilla's face darkening to a brick red hue. "Teleportini," she incanted.

Ruth screamed.

Ashley's feet lifted off from the snow-covered mountain, which was momentarily kind of cool, honestly, until a second later, when she turned from a floating human into a whirlwind.

"Ashley, I ... find ... you," came Gerald's voice, dim and garbled through the vortex.

Hungry flames licked and lapped and seared Ashley'sskin. The fire raged inward, consuming her while the pain grew so unbearable, she prayed for death. Her prayers seemed to be answered as she surrendered to an endless black chasm, dragon screams still echoing in the void.

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