Endless Bonds

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

alvin's shoulders are shaking with silent laughter.

"You guys are not slick," Tara huffs, stepping further into the terrace. "I fucking knew something was up after your football game. You looked way to blissful, Trent. Oh, and Cher? You looked like you'd given head to the devil with the way your lipstick was smeared."

Calvin only howls louder. I'm irritated at getting caught and Cher feeling embarrassed. The way her body folds and she hides against me is making me mad. "You've got something to say, bro?"

"Yeah, exactly what she said, you fucking peeping toms." He's still laughing. "Not subtle at all."

Tara takes a deep breath and levels Cher with a meaningful look. I should mention that she still hasn't put her clothes on properly and well, it's feeling weird with her tits hanging out. Granted, she's got a bra on, but still.

"Guys," Tara says with a saccharine sweet smile. "I need you all to get the fuck out and go back to the party. Cher and I need to talk."

"Go," Cher urges me with another look.

There's some type of female understand passing between them.

I don't want to leave Cher out here in the cold, but Calvin is hauling us away before I can do anything about it.

* * *

"You've got this blissful look on your face."

That's the second time I've heard that word in twenty-four hours.

I smile at Teagan without looking at her. She's completely fucking right so I don't deny it.

Teagan nudges me with her foot as we watch a new episode of The Flash together since Jared and Wyatt have ditched us. She's here for two more days and I want to spend as much time with her as I can.

"I'm happy," I tell her, adjusting the ice pad on my shoulder.

She looks more at ease than she did yesterday before we left for Inga's party. She's sipping her coffee slowly. "What's got you smiling so much?"

"Can't it be spending time with you?"

"I highly doubt seeing Iris and Barry making out is what's got you smiling; so, what's up?"

"Nothing specific. I'm just in a good mood."

Liar.

I want to tell her about Cher and I, but I wonder if it's too soon.

Last night when Tara found out, something about her reaction rubbed me the wrong way. She looked angry at Cher... which made no sense.

I knew girl's liked hearing who their best friends were doing, fucking, seeing, dating, and all that jazz. Obviously, I knew it would be weird in the beginning given our friends dynamics and history, but I thought Tara would be a bit more...understanding.

Even ecstatic. She hated Rose and had been begging me to move on from her.

But she looked downright distraught and disappointed when she kicked Calvin and I out of the room so she could have privacy with Cher.

The night took a weird turn because when Cher came out, the smile fixed on her face was fake.

We kissed and I took her home. All I got today was a good morning text and then radio silence after that.

My guess is that last night was overwhelming for Cheryl, and she needed a moment to breathe before we moved past with this, with us. I was just trying to be respectful of her choices.

But a nagging sensation told me I was missing something big...

"Trent! Are you listening to me?"

I snapped out of my reverie. Teagan was looking at me skeptically.

"Hmm?" I took a sip of my coffee. "Sorry, what did you say?"

"How was last night?"

The look on my face must have spoke volumes, since Teagan started wagging her eyebrows in a teasing manner that was so reminiscent of the girl I grew up with, the girl she seems to keep locked lately.

"It was good."

"Good?"

"So good?"

"So, you got laid," she sing-songed.

I chuckle-snorted into my coffee and she laughed. No, I didn't get laid, but I did give Cher an earth-shattering orgasm that'll remain embedded in my mind until the day I die.

I'm getting hard just thinking about her again. How her tiny body was laid out before me. How my mouth feasted on her tight, juicy pussy. How she shamelessly rocked back, wanting my tongue deeper and feeling like she couldn't get close enough...

Grabbing a pillow, I shove it over my lap, so Teagan doesn't catch my now tented fly.

"Something like that," I say absentmindedly.

"Care to elaborate?"

I bite my lip, contemplating. I really, really want to tell Teagan. Plus, some part of me wants to see Teagan's reaction to see if it's in alignment with Tara's. Is she going to be happy to hear about us, or will she be just as put-off at the idea of me and Cher?

"Can I tell you something?"

"Shoot," she says.

I lick my lips and take a deep breath. "I'm seeing Cher. As in, I really fucking like her – always have. Spending time with her in the last few weeks has only brought out old feelings I used to have for her."

Teagan's mouth pops open, before she smiles slow. "No fucking way!"

"Yes, fucking way." The pressure in my chest lightens and I'm so grateful for her reaction.

"Damn, Trent," she whistles out. "It's about freakin' time. I mean, you guys are just a few years late but better than never, right? I'm so happy to hear this."

"Thanks, babe," I tell her. "You have no idea how relieved I feel telling you. We've been hiding it from everyone for awhile until Tara discovered us yesterday."

Teagan bursts out laughing, her eyes crinkling at the corners. "Oh, my God. Stop. Are you kidding me – at the party? How did that happen; I have to know!"

I scrape a hand over my stubble peppered jaw, wondering if I should just... "Cher and I were out on the terrace while I gave her head, and Tara and Calvin were inside, actually fucking in the bedroom. Then the whole thing went to shit because we got caught."

Teagan nearly spits out her coffee. "H-Holy shit!"

"I fucking know. It was an awkward end to a really good night. Now I think Cher's avoiding me because she's shy. She wanted to gently break it to Tara and that didn't go as planned of course."

Teagan picks up the remote to change the channel. "Honestly, shit happens. Tara will come around if she hasn't already. Plus, as long as you've made peace with your pasts, then who cares? You guys deserve each other. I've witnessed Cher pin away for you all through her teenagehood. I've also witnessed you yearning for her but being too dumb to recognize what was in front of you. While the time may not have been right for you guys back then, it is now. I'm happy you guys have managed to find your way back to each other after all these years. I can say with confidence you guys are perfect for each other – you've always been."

My heart shakes a little. "Tee, you're the best. Come over here."

Opening her arms wide, she reaches forward to give me an awkward hug – well, awkward because of the way we're positioned on the couch.

"This may not be the right time to say this because of everything that's going on in your life, but Teagan, you will be okay. One day you'll find happiness and I'll be right here for you to share it with," I say this firmly because I truly believe in it.

She deserves the world, too.

"Aww. Shut up," she mumbles against my shoulder. "You'll make me cry."

I breakaway with a ridiculous grin.

We continue to watch TV in silence, when she breaches another sensitive topic. "Was Oliver mad that I'm staying here for a few days?"

I resist the urge to grab my temple. A headache will form there if I allow myself to spend too much time thinking of the shitshow that's Teagan and Oliver's history.

"Not really. I think he was just caught-off guard. Especially since he hasn't seen you in a few years."

She nods without looking at me, but I see the solemn expression slip into place.

"He doesn't hate you, Teagan. One thing I've learned is that Oliver is highly impulsive and driven by emotions. He cares for people deeply and he loves hard. When someone hurts him, his defense mechanism is assholeness instead of letting it go and moving on. He doesn't like people seeing him at his weakest, so he masks it that way. It's not the best way to look at things, but he's human and this is his flaw. Admittedly, it's one he needs working on. I think he's just embarrassed. You broke his heart Teagan and he was humiliated that you'd seen him at such a low. So now he just doesn't know how to act around you, even though he doesn't have those feelings for you. I know he doesn't want to hold onto past hate, nor is he, but he just doesn't know how to go about things. You guys have outgrown each other, but too much time has passed, and the damage is done. He just doesn't have the right words to talk to you, hence why he results to indifference and that comes off as harshness."

Teagan's voice shakes a little. "I – I know that. I just...He was my best friend for so long, you know? You had Cher. Nat had Jared. Tara had Quentin. Oliver was mine. I never wanted to lose him, but he just couldn't see eye to eye with me. Back then, he'd wanted all or nothing. And, back then, Chris had been the center of my universe. Oliver was just a little too late..."

I understand what she's saying, but I don't get the last bit about Oliver being late. As far as I know, Oliver began loving Teagan from the moment he knew what love meant. "I'm confused; what does that mean?"

There's a pause of silence, as if Teagan is collecting her thoughts. Her chest expands with a shuddering breath and she closes her eyes for a brief few seconds.

"Can I tell you something?" Teagan hedges carefully, parroting my own words at me.

"Shoot," I mimic.

"I never want to talk about this ever again. I never in my life told anyone else. Not even the girls."

Her cryptic words have me shifting uncomfortably in my seat. I look at her closely and wait for her to begin.

She clears her throat and looks away, planting her gaze on the wall-mounted clock. "When I was thirteen, I used to really like Oli...Oliver. Like, the love-type of like, if that makes sense. If I'm being truthful, I'd felt that way for him for as long as I could remember. He was always so kind-hearted and loyal, and I just couldn't help myself. But how do you tell your best friend you love them, especially at that age, without scaring them off?"

I have no words. My mouth parts as I'm dumbfounded.

"Anyways, it was Oliver's fourteenth birthday party and I'd written a secret letter to him, confessing my feelings. It was messy, but I was naïve and young. Brando Redman – remember that little shithead – got his hands on it before anyone. He ran over to Oliver and began teasing him about me. I was so embarrassed, Trent, but luckily no one knew I was hiding in the corner listening to this. Oliver looked so distraught and he told Brando that he was delusional because I was like a sister to him and that he could never like me because I wasn't pretty enough and that he should just drop it. Those words, Trent...They broke my thirteen-year-old heart. I knew there were prettier girls than me and I knew we were close, but I'd never seen him like a brother. So, I tore that letter to pieces before Oliver could see it and hid in the bathroom where I cried until the cake was cut and all the presents were open. Aayana found me a little while later."

My eyes widen as I reel over this piece of memory that I had no idea she'd lived with. "Oliver's mom found you? What did she say?"

"Yeah. She knelt in front of me, placed the torn pieces of the letter together and read it. I told her what I overheard the boys say and she looked at me with sympathy in her eyes. She told me I was a beautiful young girl and that boys were icky. She made me laugh and told me that my smile was worth more than my tears."

"Teagan, fuck...I...I never knew you felt that way about him."

She shrugs. "Didn't matter. After Aayana hugged me, we went downstairs, and she taught me how to bake cupcakes. In that moment, I promised myself that I would never tell Oliver how I felt. I told myself that I would suppress my silly feelings because that's all they were – silly. I then became the bestest friend he'd ever had – the sister he never had. Or at least that's what I like to think. Eventually I grew up, high school and puberty happened, and my feelings for Oliver were just an old memory compared to all the other guys I met and dated."

"You know what the most fucked up part is? Oliver lied to Brando to cover his own true feelings and it bit him in the ass years later. While he stayed in love with you, you fell out."

She swallows. "When he told me at Nat's birthday party how he felt, I was shocked. I told him I didn't feel the same way, and...everything ended, you know? I didn't even know how to hang around you guys anymore because everyone made me feel ashamed about my decision to be with Chris. No one accounted for the fact that, despite being a member of our school faculty, he was a family friend I'd known for awhile. We cared for each other and God forbid the fact that I'd loved him. Yes, I was seventeen-nearly-eighteen, and he was twenty-two and our gym teacher. But would anyone have given me shit if I was eighteen? I never understood what bothered you guys most: the age gap, his title, or the fact that he wasn't Oliver?"

I rub my head, not really knowing how to steer this conversation. "Tee, I don't think anyone was mad at you. I think we were all shaken up, given the nature of your, uh, forbidden relationship. It was scandalous and the girls were probably pissed on your behalf – no one wanted you to be taken advantage of. I don't think we realized he was your family friend either. We were disappointed at how Oliver handled the situation and how you distanced yourself. Then high school finished, and you were off to Harvard like none of us mattered."

Her chin wobbles a little bit and I get scared she'll cry. "I'm not perfect and I may have made some bad decisions in my life, but judgement from your closest ones hurts the most. My parents aren't even worth it, but you guys made me feel like crap, too. My last year of high school sucked and then I was just gone. Cher was the only one who understood me, because she had demons she wanted to outrun as well."

"I wish you'd called me, Teagan, and told me how you were feeling. You may not have had Oliver, but you still had the rest of us."

"Did I?" she glances skyward, her throat bobbing with emotions. "You were in college, Trent, and I just wanted to get my last year of high school over with. Between the moment I left and Quentin dying, too much time had trickled by. I didn't even know how to approach you guys at the funeral and the one person who could relate to me – Cher – wasn't even there. Boston was supposed to be a clean slate. I gave you guys space from me and I just tried to live my life."

I reach forward to grab her hand. "We missed you, Teagan. Did you never want to come back?"

"What would I come back to, Trent? My parents basically disowned me, Quentin was dead, Cher in Paris and Natalie in New York. The rest of you had your lives here and I didn't want to interrupt. I did come every year after Quentin died, but I never told you guys."

"You did?"

"Yeah. On his birthday, I'd come to visit his grave and some of his remaining family members. I never stayed for more than a day. When Elsie came back from France to open up her shop, I was given more of a reason to visit."

"It really saddens me that you felt the way you did, Tee. I would have loved to see you more. The few times Nat came down to visit, I'd hear her and Tara saying how you stopped responding."

I used to think there was miscommunication between Cher and I, but that's not it. We haven't done a great job of staying tight the way we used to be. All of us. It's a shame we let that happen.

"Like you said, some of us just outgrew one another."

I squeeze her hand. "Maybe now we can make it right. Cher is back and so are you. I know you said you're done with Harvard, but while you figure out the rest of your life, we have time to actually build our friendships again. Things will always be different, with Quentin gone, Nat so far away and Oliver's demeanor, but doesn't mean the rest of us can't give it a try."

She gives me a watery smile. "Thanks, Trent. Sometimes you talk and really make it count."

I laugh. "You're welcome."

The silence that falls between us is comfortable. It seems like all the unspoken things from years have been spoken, and the weight on our shoulders is lighter, happier.

The episode is nearly finished when Teagan turns to me with a perplexed expression. "When did you start seeing Cher again?"

"Uh, not an exact date but I'd say last week it became clear that this was something."

Her eyebrows knit together, as if something of importance dawns upon her. "So...What exactly did she tell her fiancé when she broke up with him? She told me about him, but not exactly how she let him down."

If I was holding my coffee mug, it would have fallen from my hands and slipped and stained our carpet.

Instead, it's my face that fell, my stomach that sunk, and my heart that cracked.

"Her f-fiancé?"

Teagan is nodding her head, gaze fixed on the TV screen. "Yeah, she mentioned she was engaged to someone when I saw her two days ago..."

I feel like I can't move. Where's the feeling in my legs? I'm in shock. The myriad of emotions that passes through me are jolting. Anger. Betrayal. Confusion. What the fuck.

"She told me there was another guy," I whisper. "But not that she had a fiancé she was going to fucking marry."

I feel like I just got sucker punched. Everything aches.

Teagan is taken aback, finally looking at me. "Oh shit. Trent, I swear I thought you knew. I...I didn't. Wait – where are you going?"

The feeling in my legs is back. So is my erratic heartbeat.

I'm moving before I know it, knocking shit out of the way as I fish for my wallet and keys. I'm nearly at the door when Teagan tries to stop me.

"What are you doing?" Her fingers band around my bicep and I shake her off.

I inhale a shaky breath now that I figured out the big thing I was missing.

A fucking potential husband. Her withdrawing when I got too close. Her telling me she needed time.

Well, fuck that.

"She owes me some fucking answers."

With hurt coursing through my veins, I throw open the door and ignore Teagan's shout of worry as I run.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

I'm going to try to update on Saturday as well. I hope you guys are enjoying so far. What did you guys think Tara said to Cher? What do you guys think about Teagan's secret and Oliver? What do you think about TRENT FINDING OUT?