Endless Bonds Copyright © 2016 xXMopelXx All Rights Reserved.

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here's a steel knife lodged in my throat that's stopping me from breathing.

It feels like my chest will rip in two if I keep staring at her any longer.

I drop my food back in my plate and push it away. Jared doesn't seem to notice the sudden shift in my mood as he springs up and closes the distance between him and the girls.

"Holy shit," he all but yells as he squeezes the life out of Cher.

Her answering giggle flits in the air and my fists clench.

She looks different. Blonder, tanner, slimmer, taller - though the last one can be due to her sky-scraping boots. The only thing that hasn't changed are her eyes.

Frenzied blue eyes that meet mine over Jared's shoulder. She visibly tenses in his embrace when her eyes land on mine. She pulls away from him. Is that guilt and shock burning in her gaze?

My smile slips off my face.

I break eye contact and stare hard at my hands. Oddly enough, I am moved by the wave of anger washing over me. I'm physically torn between wanting to get up and hug her or storming out of the Lunch Box in a fit of rage.

The truth is I haven't spoken to her in a long time. Cheryl stopped answering my texts over a year ago and somewhere along the way, I guess I stopped caring. Although it had fucking killed me in the beginning, I learnt to ignore the ache simmering inside of me whenever she'd decline my calls. Whenever she'd never check my texts. I got over it, even though I never learnt what I'd done to have her act this way towards me.

She has never told me, and I'm done playing guess-who with her.

And the way she's looking at me right now is clear indication that I'm the last thing she expects. She doesn't want to see me.

I get up and try to smile at her but she whips her head the other way and... I'm left hanging once again. A year and a half later and I'm still fucking left hanging. Embarrassment rockets through me at being rejected and I sit my ass back down.

Tara is the first one to realize that I still exist. Her face is flushed, probably from excitement of having Cher so close. She waves her hand at me like a maniac. "Trent - Hey!"

Doesn't mean I can't smile at her. She nears our table and I give her a brotherly hug. But my eyes can't help but riveting back to Cheryl, who seems preoccupied with everything but catching my gaze. Twisting her hair. Fiddling with the strap of her purse.

Dammit, why can't she look at me? Why can't she tell me what I fucking did wrong?

The shock of seeing her standing in front of me is so strong that I remain in my reverie even as I pull away from Tara.

"How's my favorite guy doing?" Tara asks good-naturedly, with a little bounce to her steps.

I swat her butt playfully. "Just fine and yourself?"

"I heard you were playing with some balls outside." There's a wicked gleam in her eyes and I bet you fifty bucks she's referring to my most recent informal football practice. "How cute."

Tara was always the first one to cheer me on when I told my mom I wanted to seriously pursue football. So, I'll allow her to tease me.

"I was," I agree. "Felt pretty lonely out there. Maybe you should ask your hot sorority sister Stephanie Ivanov if she wants to come help me play with my balls. I'll feel less alone and a lot better."

Tara grins and slaps my chest as she laughs. I can't remember the last time she laughed this much, though it must have something to do with Cheryl, who, by the way, seems to be fully immersed in a conversation with Jared. They keep hugging and murmuring things to each other.

"You and Steph - Now that's hot. I'm sure she'd love to give you a BJ. Ask nicely and she might oblige. Make sure you catch it on tape, I reckon the students on campus will pay big bucks to see you guys fondling each other."

I roll my eyes and click my tongue. "Pervert."

Then Tara freezes, along with her laughter. "Wait a minute. Don't you have a girlfriend-"

I'm already gathering my tray with my untouched food because I'm done with this conversation. Cher keeps looking at me now. Fuck, if she wants to talk or say some thing, why doesn't she step forth?

A part of me is dying to talk to her. To exchange hey-how-are-yous and it's-been-a-long-time with her.

"Ex girlfriend," I call out to Tara as I throw my food in a nearby trashcan.

She gasps as she hears about Rose and I breaking up.

Ignoring her, I walk towards Jared, who has his back to me. Cheryl's eyes widen when she sees me coming closer and it looks like she forces an awkward smile.

"Jared," I tell him as I place my hand on his shoulder. "I'm heading out, man. I'll catch you later?"

He finally detaches himself from his conversation with Cheryl and I can see just how happy he's by seeing her. His smile is too fucking bit for his face and he looks like he can barely contain his excitement, too.

So it's just my fucking face she can't stand the sight of.

Sometimes I forget how close we all used to be. Jared, Oliver...fvck, Quentin...and I. Natalie and the girls. Such a tight knit group. From our childhood days to our teenage years, we were all inseparable. Funny how it can all go to shxt.

"Dudeee," he laughs. "It's fucking Cher. I can't remember the last time I saw her." He ruffles her hair playfully and leans forward to kiss her cheek. She lets him and wraps her arms around him for another quick hug. "I missed you."

Their actions send a pang to my chest, because that used to be me and her a long time ago.

My side-kick. Partner in crime. The Robin to my Batman. Whatever the fuck.

I muster a quick head nod and Cheryl's face transforms a little bit. She grows more... courageous?

"Hey," I murmur to her.

Her voice sounds clipped. "Hi." Then, she shifts away.

And I'm automatically more pissed. Lately I've been pissed and moody at everything. I decide right here and then that I don't need this bullshxt in my life. She wants to act like we were never friends? Cool. I. Can. Fvcking. Do. That.

I excel at acting like nothing fucking matters in my life.

Yet...I don't even know why I try again. "How've you been, Cheryl?"

Tara slides up beside me and the tension in our circle intensifies. It's almost as if Jared and Tara are both aware of the awkwardness surrounding us.

"Good," she says flippantly, adjusting her purse again. "Great."

I run my fingers through my hair, needing something to do with my shaky hands. "I, uh, texted you a couple of times over the year. Are you visiting or something?"

Tara and Cheryl exchange a measured look. Cheryl locks gazes with me and I see her swallow roughly.

"Oh," she says with a dismissive voice. "I enrolled some time ago."

My eyebrows raise. Wow. I'm about to tell her that's amazing and ask her how did this happen, before she cuts me off.

"And I saw your texts." She winces as that bit of information escapes her mouth.

My jaw clenches. Right. She saw. She deliberately ignored my messages. It shouldn't hurt me...But damn, it does.

"Cool." I nod, already pulling my car keys out of my pockets and shoving my sunglasses onto my eyes. "So you basically just couldn't be bothered to text back."

Her face finally flashes with emotion, as if my words have truly hurt her. Good. I'm too much of an asshole to care, I guess.

When she stares at me without saying another word, I realize I've had enough hurting for one day.

I turn around to walk away when the tension becomes too much.

"Trent!" Cheryl finally frantically addresses me. "It wasn't like that-"

"Save it," I nearly snarl over my shoulder. "I really don't give two flying fvcks anymore. Have a good stay, Cheryl."

And just like that I'm gone, leaving them looking after me with bewildered expressions.

So what did you think? Is Trent's reaction justified? x