TIANA

"How's Rita," I mumbled pushing the empty plate away only to resort to staring at the ground, unwilling to witness his reaction. I felt him shift next to me, aware of his slightly large body next to my petite frame.

"She's freaking out and blaming herself for what happened," he glanced in my direction," we both do."

"I should have been more careful," I whispered moving forward, overwhelmed to the point I leaned forward supporting most of my weight on my knees. Given my behaviour, I should have been watching my surroundings but I made myself an easy target for predators like that.

"Look, I know anything I say won't be much help. And I'm well aware I said this before, but all I know is that before you use this situation as an excuse to shut yourself off. . . just don't," he breathed," people like him shouldn't get to have so much control over you."

"You sound like you know him," I scoffed and I watched his orbs darken significantly but before I could spend any more time on the unreadable look, he blinked switching off completely.

"I know people like him," he murmured." but I'm serious, Tiana. You don't deserve to glue yourself to just working whilst life passes you by."

"It's easier to say that because you're a guy."

"But-"

"But nothing," I interrupted," if I had said no, none of this would have happened."

I felt the sofa shift, he had turned his body a little more in my direction and I had yet to stir up enough courage inside myself to look him in the eye," Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to sit here and pretend that shit didn't happen," he sighed." But nothing happened."

Still-

"And with me there. Nothing was going to happen," his voice came out a lot deeper. That statement pushed me to look up to his silver-grey orbs, the colour in them reflecting the face of the sky on a day where the sun never bloomed.

"I'm afraid if I say thank you again- you'll use that as an excuse to keep showing up in my life."

A small grin appeared on his face," Would that really be a bad thing?"

"Yes."

"Bullshit," he calmly replied.

"If you were aware of why I behave the way I do-"

"Won't stop me."

"I'm sure you have better things to do in your life," I blurted out purely out of curiosity which was odd considering most of the things I said to him were from a place of frustration.

"I'm kind of going through a period of writer's block. So. . ." he left the sentence mid-air.

I rolled my eyes moving away from him on the couch," So I'm some form of amusement to cater to your boredom."

"Would you prefer the truth," he offered innocently.

He took my silence as confirmation," I like being around you."

Raising my brow in shock, I scoffed crossing my arms," You're joking."

"Okay, fine," he chuckled raising his hands in mock surrender," I like being around your mother though. She . . . kind of reminds me of mine. She was the one who encouraged me to become an author."

"Well she must be proud of your success," I gestured to the expansive room.

"She was," he mumbled wearing an expression I knew all too well of someone grieving the loss of a loved one.

"I'm sorry about your loss," I mumbled staring at the side of his face; I was never the best at dealing with grief much less when it came to consoling others in such a predicament. He peered at me, his eyes shining with something.

A part of me felt delusional for even thinking there was anything beyond the look in his eyes when he said," I'm sorry for everything."

***

Leaning against the car door, I'm met with the pewter grey sky; I put most of my focus on the scenery passing before me. I was doing my best to ignore that smell rolling off him only to fail miserably given the way I kept taking subtle glances at his profile as he drove. I studied him quietly, my emotions all over such that I wasn't sure which category I could place myself in for how I felt. His kindness kept throwing me off and I was growing a lot more annoyed with myself for kind of . . . not hating it completely?

No!

I won't move on from that shit.

Having made up my mind, my lips were set into a firm line. "Stop frowning," he chastised when he caught me peeking in his direction. I scoffed leaning further against the car door as if that would make the journey that much shorter and I'd be able to exit this confined space. I wanted to be alone.

"You practically forced me into your car."

"Not as if I tased you, you'll survive," he shrugged stopping the car on the sidewalk. Pushing the door, I grew annoyed when the door refused to open only to snap my head to find him smirking.

"Open the door," I demanded.

"You really shouldn't push people away when they're just trying to help you."

"I'm not looking for a saviour," I murmured looking longingly outside.

"Trust me; I'm far too imperfect to make myself that. All I want to be is your friend."

"No."

"But I saved you," he whined leaning his head back against the headrest.

"Luis-"

"God, I don't think I'll ever get tired of hearing you say that," he groaned eliciting a light chuckle from me although I wanted to hold it. I laid my head on the window, rubbing my temples once it was silent again between us.

"Can't I just say thank you again and we can go back to acting like complete strangers?"

"Nah," he smirked rubbing his chin in thought, licking his lips in the process," we haven't even gotten to the interesting part of this story yet."

Huh?

Before I could ponder more on his statement, the door clicked. I remained frozen in my seat unwilling to allow my eyes to move away from his profile. He shifted forward and opened the door, invading my space, breath hitching with him a lot closer. I was grateful when he shifted away allowing the space in my chest to settle back into a steady rhythm.

"This is the part you leave," he smiled coyly gesturing to the door. The gust of wind that entered the vehicle made me shiver but that never failed to stop me from stepping out into the mild chilly air. The car engine revved back to life, I continued to stand on the sidewalk and watched the vehicle move further away from me.

And some part of me was now certain that no matter how much I may despise him . . . I was glad he had been there.

***

"I'm sorry . . . for everything. Honestly, I feel like shit because of what happened to you," Rita mumbled, her expression was remorseful and I could tell she was kicking herself over what happened. I had done my best throughout the rest of the weekend, told my mind to erase the little images I had in my mind of that night and decided I had to move past it.

When she came in this morning, the way her eyes remained downcast made me annoyed at the fact that she blamed herself for this. The only one who was to blame was the coward who thought it was fun to drug people and take advantage of them.

People like that deserve to rot in hell for all I care.

I reached out and gave her hand a gentle squeeze," its okay, Rita. It wasn't your fault and seeing you beat yourself over this, it-it just doesn't sit well with me." She smiled but it felt a bit forced as she nodded her head, I gave her a smile in return to show her in any way I could that I had nothing but respect for her.

"Luis told me you'd say that."

I perked up in my seat at the mention of his name," Oh."

Her brow rose when my body shifted away from hers.

"He's really not a bad guy, you know."

"Looks like he's won everyone over from my mother to you."

"Ive . . . known him for years but our relationship never started out on the best terms. If it wasn't for the people around us we would have remained on opposite sides," she smiled in a way that made me curious. Luis was the last person I expected to know Rita so well. She remained silent afterwards, but her eyes spoke volumes. Images flashing revealing a symphony of stories I myself wanted to suddenly know.

"The people around you?"

"We're moulded from the things we face. It may be good . . . or bad, I don't particularly like to get into specifics unless I feel the need to."

I nodded my head in understanding, I wouldn't push her to convey anymore and I immediately tried to throw water on the flame being fuelled by my curiosity of the grey-eyed man.

"And before I forget," she mumbled shifting forward to reveal a small folded piece of paper from her pocket," Luis wanted me to give this to you. He claimed the last thing he'd want is another replay of the last time," she smiled knowingly.

Oh shit.

"Yeah, I'm aware of what happened. I had a feeling you didn't like him but kudos for the taser- I did not see that coming," she laughed, making me laugh with much difficulty.

"Yo-you're not upset?"

"Please," she raised her hands," I prefer to watch than get involved," she stood up grinning down at me.

I glanced at the piece of paper, my curiosity peaking beyond anything else as I replied," So not only are you an attorney you also happen to be a messenger," I joked lightly unfolding the paper. The smile on my face instantly dropped the second I took in the poor hand-writing scribbled.

Bumps along the way, you faced

On your path.

To hesitate your wishes to raise a glass,

But through the bumps, I'll hear your song,

And help your heart in moving on. . .

From the ass of a man

It took a few seconds to register the smile on my face until I looked up and found that Rita was nowhere in sight.

I re-read the lines a few times, falling once again into a gentle laugh at the name. But at the same time I found myself growing more aware that as much as I wanted him out of my life, life wasn't willing to negotiate on any of my preferences.

And I didn't know what was worse at that moment- knowing I'm judging him based off of someone else's faults or growing tolerant of the fact he wasn't going anywhere.