《Your POV》

Although you had originally planned for a leisurely day out in the town with Scaramouche, your plans had somewhat changed. After receiving word that the Tsaritsa knew of your involvement with the 6th harbinger, you now had to pack your things and prepare to travel to Snezhnaya.

Traveling to such a cold nation did not give you very much joy at all. In fact, you were dreading it. At least you'd get to be with Scaramouche. But even then, you weren't sure if even that would make it better.

You still had your concerns about Scaramouche. From what you've gathered, he was usually very disagreeable and none of his comrades liked him. Apparently, he was very selfish and didn't know when to keep his mouth shut either. He had little regard for other people, especially those who he deemed beneath him. Yet for some reason, he only acted different around you.

Even with all this in mind, you still wanted to trust him. Maybe you really were a masochist? In any case, whether you fully trusted him or not, you were still heading into certain death by walking into Snezhnaya as a "traitor".

Scaramouche had told you not to bring too much. As he put it, "Traitors to the Fatui have no right to carry such belongings while going to meet the Tsaritsa." You thought it was a bit harsh, but then again, this was the Fatui you were talking about.

You could survive a while without your stuff. After all, you were supposed to be pretending to be a Fatui spy who had betrayed your nation and your Archon. You weren't quite sure if you could pull it off.

Instead of your nice afternoon in the town with Scaramouche, he was stuck teaching you all about the do's-and-dont's of the Fatui.

"Only speak when spoken to," Scaramouche rambled on about the strict rules, "Especially with the Tsaritsa herself. Never speak to her without her speaking first, got it? Now, tell me who you are."

You gulped, a bit nervous, as you weren't that great of an actor, "I'm Y/N, a Fatui diplomat sent as a spy for the Adventure's Guild. During an undercover mission, I ended up betraying the Fatui by giving away confidential information to the guild in an attempt to sabotage the Fatui."

"Good," he grinned, "Now let's hope she buys this and decides not to kill us both." Scaramouche stood up and looked over to Childe, who was still just waiting on your couch.

Childe decided he'd help the two of you out, but he really wasn't doing anything productive.

Scaramouche groaned, "If you're going to intrude on Y/N's home, at least be somewhat helpful, you dimwit."

The redhead rolled his eyes, "My job is to be an accomplice for you two. So as of now, I am not needed. I rest my case." He wore a very sly grin.

You sighed, leaning back in the chair you had been resting in for almost 2 hours. Your thoughts were racing, and honestly they had been like that for a while. There was so much to think about, so much happening, you didn't know what to think anymore.

Would you have been feeling this way if you'd never met Scaramouche? What if you never gave him a second chance? Would you still be feeling like this?

Brushing off all these feelings, you had a new thought, "Scaramouche?" You asked, he turned his head to look at you, "What if the Tsaritsa finds out you're lying? Isn't lying to her way worse than having a romantic partner..?"

He paused. Deep down, he knew what the risks were, and maybe it would've just been easier to come clean and just say he had a "moment of weakness". In all honestly, he didn't know why he was going to such lengths.

Childe piped in again, "They're actually right you know," he stood, slowly walking over to the two of you, "Why are you doing this?" He said, as if he wasn't the one who came up with the idea in the first place.

Scaramouche frowned, "I don't know."

You were almost shocked. You'd never seen Scaramouche look so unsure of himself. It even worried you.

"Maybe we shouldn't go through with it then," you added, "I mean, think of it logically. She doesn't know what our relationship is, she just knows that you've been spotted with me. Staying I'm a Fatui spy is dangerous, so what if we went with something a bit less.. intense."

Scaramouche folded his arms, "Like what exactly?"

You nervously looked away, scared of being judged by Scaramouche by speaking up, "Well, instead of the 'me being a spy' plan, what if we didn't have to change anything at all?"

The two harbingers just looked at you, obviously confused.

"W-What I mean is, just say you were trying to get information from the guild by forming a fake relationship with one of the members," your idea was quite logical, and way safer than the previous one, this way, nobody will have to suffer. You won't have to be executed, and Scaramouche could keep his job.

But the more you thought about it, the more you started to doubt Scaramouche's sincerity. What if.. the theory you just came up with actually happened..? Was Scaramouche just using you to get information? Was that why he so desperately wanted to get you back after you'd parted ways?

After your sudden realization, you couldn't help but feel sick to your stomach. What if it really was true?

"Excuse me.. I just remembered something I needed to do," you walked out of the house in a hurry, causing Scaramouche to call out to you, but before he could finish even saying your name, you had left.

Maybe it was dramatic of you, it probably was, but at that moment, all you could think about was the possibility of it being true.

You should've listened to your gut when it said he was a bad guy. You should've never gave him a second chance. You should've never accepted to travel with him in the first place. If you hadn't, you wouldn't be in so much pain.

A part of you thought you enjoyed the pain. Why else would you continue to be with him? Was it possible that you.. loved him? You'd never thought about the L word until now, as you were cowardly running away from him.

You finally made it to the front gate of Mondstadt. As you collected yourself and caught your breath, you realized how dramatic that was. You didn't have to run away, after all, you still didn't know if it was actually true. Yet even the mere thought of it being true terrified you.

Mondstadt had been quite rainy the past week, and now was no exception. The sun was covered by dark gray clouds and the wind seemed to be quite strong.

As you made your way to the edge of the island Mondstadt sat on, you laid down in the damp grass. You hadn't had a moment to just sit a breathe. It was nice, being able to forget about everything even if just for a second.

You estimated that one of the harbingers would be after you by now, so you soaked in the moment while it lasted.

And of course, as you had finished that thought, you could hear swift footsteps on the path next to you.

"Y/N!" Scaramouche said from behind you, clearly out of breath. You wondered what took him so long, after all, you had only walked and it seemed like he was running, "What happened back there?" He stood a few feet away from you, looking at you as you laid on the floor.

You reluctantly sat up, knowing you would have to face this dilemma eventually.

"Do you love me?" You asked, no hesitation at all.

Scaramouche was dumbfounded at the question. He was speechless, and it took a lot to get him to that point.

Without letting him answer, you continued, "I came to the realization just now, that you might feel differently about me than I feel about you."

He was silent. You weren't sure if he was being quiet on purpose, or if he was genuinely shocked.

You went on, "I was stupid to fall in love with someone like you. Even if you say you're genuine, you're still a harbinger. It doesn't change the fact that you're manipulative and controlling. Even if you don't show it with me, that's your personality, it can't be changed that easily."

"Y/N-" he started, only to be cut off by you once again.

"I realize now that maybe you're just using me for information. Or maybe you wanted somebody you could control. Either way, you've lied to be before, you could lie again." Your eyes started to fill up with tears. You felt weak for showing your emotions like that, but at this point it didn't matter.

Scaramouche sat down next to you, his hat shielding you from the rain. He nervously gazed into the water below, "I don't know how I can earn your trust back, but I swear to you my feelings for you are genuine. I know I tricked you at first, and there's no excuse for that, but now I know never to take that for granted."

All you could do was look away, you couldn't face him after what he said.

"I can't explain it. It's like you brought out a whole other side in me, one I didn't know existed." Scaramouche placed his hand on yours, causing you to look at him.

"You don't have to believe me, but I just want you to know that.. you made me a better person." He averted his eyes away from you, "I know I'm not the most likable person, but you make me feel so loved. I'm just not used to it.."

You didn't know he felt these things. Sure, he's shown you he likes you with kisses or sweet words, but he never expressed anything like this.

Scaramouche continued, "And in the future, if you still don't trust me, I won't blame you if you want to leave me."

For some reason, hearing him say all these things made you happy. It showed his growth as a person, he realized his mistakes and flaws, and that he was willing to fix them because of you.

You turned this ruthless man into someone willing to change himself to be a better person. You'd say that was quite the accomplishment.

"And to answer your question," Scaramouche managed to give you a sweet yet somewhat seductive smile, "I do love you."

Even after all these painful thoughts, he managed to turn you into a flustered mess once again.

All you could do in this moment was hug him as if you were never going to see him again. You wanted to respond but you fell mute. Yet, he understood and gladly hugged you back.

"May I kiss you now, or is it too soon?" Scaramouche teasingly asked.

Your face turned bright red once again. He really did have a way with words, didn't he. But your heart wasn't at all prepared, "S-Shut up, we have work to do.." you pulled away from your embrace and stood up, leaving a pouting Scaramouche on the floor.

"Okay, okay," he stood up as well. The both of you started heading back to your house, where you would plan out the rest of your devious plan to fool the Tsaritsa.

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