"I-I can't"

Two words that changed the ecstatic nerves I was feeling to numbness.

"w-why n-not?" I asked. I used to stutter as a kid when I was scared or nervous but right now I was just nub.

"Alexander...." Magnus started softly

"Why the fuck not Magnus?" I asked standing up. Numbness slowly turned into anger

"Let me explain" Magnus pleaded

"Explain it to me then" I said trying to keep myself come

"I was talking to Dr. Fairchild and she was telling me about another couple her mother used to see. She told me that after they got married their relationship because very dangerous. They were always seen with bruises and scars till 2 years after they got married they were found dead. It was a murder suicide. The husband killed the wife then himself." He said

"So? We are not them! We won't let our relationship become like that" I said there were bells in my ears and my heart was beating really fast

"You can't promise me that. I could never live with myself if I hurt you and it would drive you mad if you hurt me. We both need submissive partners to balance us out" he said

"Submissive partners?? What the fuck do you mean submissive partners? Why are you psychoanalyzing this?" I asked I could feel my rage building and my muscles tensing.

"We would make a very volatile house hold. It would be dangerous" he said

"what are you saying then you want to throw 7 years of love and happiness out the window because a couple we never met and never knew couldn't handle it?" I asked

"Alexander..." he started

"Fuck you! Fuck you Magnus!!!!" I said I was fuming I walked out of the room and into the kitchen. He followed me

"Alexander this isn't fair" he tried

"I don't fucking care if it is! You told me you didn't want us and I didn't get any say in the matter. I was ready to settle down with you. To call you my fucking husband but no you think we would make a volatile house hold as you called it!!" I said turned around and punched the cabinet door which broke off its hinges

"Alexander" he tried again

"Shut up! Shut the fuck up Magnus! Just fuck off and leave me alone!" I said I was still fuming and I was sure I would do something I would regret if I didn't get him away from me.

"Alexander I love you" he said softly grabbed the plate from the broken cupboard and threw it at his head he ducked and it hit the wall on the other side of the room

"You don't fucking love me! This isn't love" I growled at him

"Listen to you!" he growled back angrily

"You're going on and on about not being fair. Do you think I chose this?" he asked I started towards him angrily but stopped my self

"You chose this!" I said through clenched teeth

"I didn't fucking choose this Alec! I don't want to lose you. I love you for fucks sake why would I choose a future without you" he asked

"Because you're a fucking coward" I said and the next thing I know he was punching me and I fell to the floor. He stood over me.

"I am not a coward" he growled I kicked his leg out from under him and put him in a chock hold when he fell over me

"You fucking are. You want a submissive partner go right ahead. I won't beg you to stay with me. I'll lick my wounds and get on with my life" I said angrily. He hit me with his elbow twisted himself so he had his legs locked around my neck and my arm twisted.

"I don't want anyone else I want you, you fucking idiot. But we can't..." he was crying while talking and when he couldn't say anything anymore I went slack in his hold. He let me go and I sat up.

"I'm not letting you go without a fight" I said firmly

"A-Alexander" he called weakly. I turned him to me and kissed him and hard bruising kiss. Like that we channeled our anger and frustration into lust and passion for each other. An hour later we laid there on the floor our clothes thrown all over the place. My body decoder with scratches and his neck littered with bite marks and hickeys. We were covered with sweat and panting.

"w-we can do that" I panted

"Do what?" he asked confused

"When we get angry at each other or an episode is triggered lets have angry sex" I proposed

"Alexander this wasn't angry sex. It was wild and unhinged and really violent." He said I sat up with a sigh tears filled my eyes

"It will get it out of our system for at least a week" he added and I turned to him with hopeful eyes. He sat up and kissed me and I kissed back this unlike our previous kisses was soft and love driven instead of lust.

"Yes" he whispered when we pulled apart

"What?" I asked confused

"Yes I'll marry you" he replied with a chuckle and I tackled him back on to the floor. We made out slowly for a couple of minutes till we needed air and broke the kiss.

"Where's the ring?" he asked a while later

"Still in the other room. We'll look for it later. I just want to hold you right now" I mumbled against the skin of his neck. We stayed like that almost for an hour without talking

"You wanted our honey moon to be somewhere special that's why you chose Ethiopia as our next trip. You wanted to go there because of the Ethiopian restaurant we went to on our first date" he said I chuckled and kissed him

"Yeah. You want to?" I asked softly

"I love you so much" he said and kissed me again

"Love you too mags" I muttered against his lips when we pulled apart.

We may have broken a hotel bed in Ethiopia, Addis Ababa but we had a great honeymoon and I'm sure we will have a happy married life.