"We often miss opportunity because it's dressed in overalls and looks like work." Thomas A. Edison

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Chapter Sixteen

It had been an odd week since Cassian had learned the truth of Faith's identity. Never in his wildest dreams could Cassian had ever have predicted Faith's tale.

Cassian had always known that there had been some underlying facts about herself that Faith had been concealing. Perhaps an unfortunate relationship with her parents, or her late husband's gambling debts, but never this.

Faith was really Anne Pendleton.

Anne was the wife of George Pendleton, the Earl of Runthorpe.

Lucy was truly a lady. She was Lady Lucy Pendleton. She was entitled to such riches and society. She would be a prize when it came time for her to marry.

The Earl, despite his wealth, was a barbarian. He had caused the death of Anne's first child, and his cruelty had led to Anne creating the ruse that had led her to Cassian.

But most of all, the Earl was alive.

Cassian could recall the story. What a story it had been at the time. It had been all over the newspapers: Countess Killed in Carriage Catastrophe. Of course, at the time, he had not made any connection with the story. The newspapers had been floating around the public houses Cassian frequented as he regained his strength after near starvation. But everybody had been talking about the dead Countess.

But she was not dead. The Countess was dusting Cassian's study.

Cassian sat back in his chair on the second of January, eighteen hundred and six, as he watched Faith flit about his study as she normally did. Lucy played on his study floor as she normally did.

Everything was normal. Except everything had changed.

Cassian felt such overwhelming anger and sympathy for Faith. She had endured an animal. Being wed to such a man must have been like eternal fire for her. It enraged Cassian that in the eyes of the law, Faith was powerless against such a tyrant. It enraged Cassian that nobody had protected Faith. Not her parents, not her brother and sister-in-law. Not anybody except for Mr Carne, and even he had been too late to save her son. Her Sky.

But here she was, pottering about her usual chores, seemingly peaceful. Faith had resumed the life she was accustomed to in Cassian's household. She had been such a wealthy, great lady, and here she was, in a black maid's uniform, wiping every surface in his study.

Cassian now fully understood why Faith did not appreciate material things. She had once been in possession of everything, and yet she had nothing. Faith now possessed everything she could have ever needed right here in this study.

And yes, Cassian did include himself in that equation. In his heart, he was Faith's, and she was his. It seemed so simple. Cassian could love Faith for the rest of his days. Cassian would happily step into the role of Lucy's father. He would ensure that she received the very best education, and the protective love of a father.

But it could never be. Faith could not be his. Anne was George Pendleton's. No matter how barbaric the possessive term seemed, it was true in the eyes of the law. Faith was another man's wife, and the truly selfish part of Cassian's heart loathed that fact.

Cassian felt such jealousy, disappointment and self-pity. And he hated every inch of himself for feeling that way.

Cassian had wanted to speak to Faith when he had returned home on Christmas Day. He wanted to seek the truth, and to properly discuss everything, as per his new friend Finn's advice.

Once everything was settled, Cassian was going to drop down on one knee and propose properly. He had not purchased a ring. Faith had not responded positively to the last ring that Cassian had presented her with. Instead Cassian had spent fifteen thousand pounds on a glorious new life for them.

Cassian had been planning on presenting Faith with the key to their new home in Norwood, Derbyshire.

And now that key was settled in his desk drawer, never to be utilised.

Cassian was most unsettled. He had promised Faith that he would protect her and Lucy, and he would keep that promise, but he had a funny feeling. Life could not go on as it once had. Too much had changed.

This secret was of huge proportions. If it was ever discovered that Anne Pendleton was still alive, the repercussions would be enormous. George Pendleton's embarrassment was what concerned Cassian the most. The shame and humiliation that a man experienced after the abandonment of his wife was great. What would George would do to Faith if he ever got his hands on her again?

Cassian would give his own life before that happened.

"What are you staring at?"

Cassian was snapped out of his daydream when Faith had spoken to him.

Faith had finished her chores and was now sitting on the floor with Lucy. She was smiling at him, looking as beautiful as ever, and she was as married as she always would be. Cassian willed himself to stop thinking so impurely. What sins he was amassing.

"What do you say we wander down to the church and gift those books to the children," Cassian suggested, though he was not entirely sure how sensible it would be for him to walk into a church coveting as he was.

Faith had ordered enough books for each child to have two with her fifteen shilling Christmas present.

"I suppose the weather is better today," Faith agreed, peering out his window. It had been pouring with rain all week and Faith had not wanted to take a risk in bringing Lucy outdoors.

Faith smiled at him again, the same smile she had been giving him at least half a dozen times a day since she had revealed to him her true identity. They seemed to say "I am sorry, but thank you." Cassian knew that Faith was grateful to him.

The selfish part of him again was telling him that George Pendleton had to die someday. Perhaps Cassian could marry Faith when they were in their fifties.

Thirty years. What a horrible thought.

"Go and fetch your cloaks. I will meet you downstairs."

Faith left the study carrying Lucy and Cassian made his way down to the foyer. He ducked into the library and went to collect his copy of Utopia. His mother, the good woman that she was, had ensured that her son had been taught to read. Utopia had inspired him as a young man. It helped him to believe that those of simple means and low birth could amount to something when given the chance.

Cassian's thoughts went to the boy he had met upon his last visit to the church. Kit reminded Cassian so much of himself. Cassian was certain that this book could help him. As Faith would put it, it could inspire Kit to make something of himself.

"Oh, forgive me, sir." Mr Wade had begun to retreat out of the library when he had seen it was occupied.

"No, no, Wade. Please," beckoned Cassian. "I am just leaving. In fact, Mrs Rowe and I will be out this afternoon if you could excuse her."

Cassian knew exactly what Mr Wade was thinking. He knew what all the servants thought. Cassian was not well practiced in concealing his particular favouritism for Faith. He knew it was not conventional for a master to spend such time with a housemaid. Cassian trusted his household not to talk, but to outsiders, he knew what it would look like.

"Of course, sir," he murmured.

Cassian tucked the book in his coat pocket and left the library. When he returned to the foyer, Faith and Lucy were waiting for them, protected in their warm travelling cloaks.

Cassian took the package of books from Faith. "Shall we?" he proposed, offering Faith his arm.

Faith held onto Lucy's hand and then took Cassian's arm. It felt so natural to leave the house like they were, as though they were a family on an outing.

Together they walked the short distance to the church. As it was freezing, Cassian felt a fool to not have ordered his carriage. Not ten feet had they walked before he lifted Lucy up into his arms so that he could keep her warm.

As it was a Friday, the church was relatively empty, except for the Reverend who was practicing his Sunday sermon. "Mrs Rowe," he remarked. "Mr Kensington."

"Good afternoon, Reverend," greeted Faith. "Mr Kensington has seen to it that I can gift these books to the children." Faith gestured to the package of books that Cassian was still holding.

Reverend Atwood smiled warmly. "How kind," he remarked. "I am sure the children would be very grateful to receive such a generous gift."

Cassian placed Lucy on the ground as Reverend Atwood led their party towards the back of the church where the children were housed.

The children were elated to see Faith and Lucy. Faith was quickly taken by the hand and led away towards the settee. Cassian placed the package of books beside her and Faith set about in pulling them out and showing them to the children.

Cassian smiled. Faith was so good. She had such a big heart for people. If Norwood was the type of community that Finn had described, Cassian was certain that Faith would have thrived there. He was so disappointed now that she would never know it and the people would never know her.

Cassian quickly noticed that Kit was not among the children that Faith was entertaining. He momentarily panicked, thinking that even Reverend Atwood might have expelled the boy because of his age. Cassian knew that was a wicked thought when he noticed Kit outside in a little courtyard that adjoined the church.

Kit was outside in the freezing weather in nothing but a thin, worn shirt for warmth. He was playing with a well-loved football, kicking it from end to end of the courtyard. If it were possible, Kit had grown in the weeks since Cassian had last seen him. He was taller, but still just as skinny. His untidy blond curls were longer, too, nearly reaching his shoulders.

Cassian entered the courtyard and closed the door behind him, so as not to let the warmth escape. It was so cold outside. Cassian knew that Kit was going to catch the death if he was not careful.

It was then that Kit noticed that he was not alone in the courtyard. He stopped the football by placing his foot on top of it. He stared at Cassian with his distrustful green eyes.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded to know.

"Mrs Rowe has brought books for the children," replied Cassian.

"Why?" Kit muttered. "They are all too stupid to know how to read."

Cassian pursed his lips. He knew that Kit did not really think that the children were stupid. Kit thought that he was stupid after Cassian had embarrassed him upon their first meeting. "Perhaps those books will inspire them to learn," he suggested. "Come now, do not stop on my account." Cassian pointed to the football at Kit's feet.

Kit's hard exterior softened, only just, as he kicked the football towards Cassian.

Cassian stopped the football with his right foot, before kicking it back to Kit. "Are you not cold?"

Kit returned the football. "A little," he admitted.

Cassian stopped the ball. "Do you have a coat?" he asked before kicking it again.

Kit shook his head before kicking the ball against the wall of the courtyard, allowing the ball to ricochet directly towards Cassian's feet. Cassian was impressed.

"I am afraid I embarrassed you at our first meeting, Kit," Cassian said regretfully, stopping the ball.

Kit squared his shoulders and stared directly at Cassian. "Not as much as the lady embarrassed you," he countered, motioning indoors. "I heard her refuse you." The boy was trying to be cruel, to wound Cassian just as Cassian had wounded him.

Cassian's eyes narrowed. "You need to understand something, child," he said firmly. The change in Cassian's tone caused Kit to stiffen. "You are of no significance to anyone." Cassian took a step towards Kit. "Nobody knows that you are here." Another step. "I understand that this attitude you possess protects you from truly feeling." Another step. "But it will not serve you well in future. If you are not careful you will end up on the side of the road. Dead." Cassian was now standing three feet from Kit. Even though he was fourteen, he was still a child. The boy had tears in his green eyes. Cassian's words were hurting him.

"Why are you saying these things?" Kit asked, his voice breaking.

"Because I was just like you when I was your age." Cassian had never been as rude as Kit, but then he supposed he had not experienced abandonment as Kit had. But Cassian had been just as poor, just as alone, and just as angry at the world for his situation.

Kit scoffed in disbelief. "Please. A rich man like you?"

"I was not always rich," Cassian countered. "I was an orphan. I had no money and no home. No prospects at all. I was starving, and I was dying. Were it not for a helping hand, I would not be standing before you today."

Cassian could tell that Kit was still very unsure about him. Cassian supposed the tale was quite fantastic. Not many people could boast from having been hours from death to being one of the wealthiest men in London.

"The trick, young man, is to accept help when it is offered," Cassian continued. Cassian reached inside his coat and pulled Utopia out from his pocket. "Merry Christmas," he said, holding out the book to Kit.

Kit tentatively accepted the book, and looked down at the cover. He then looked back up at Cassian with angry eyes. "Are you teasing me, sir?" he demanded to know.

"Not at all. I thought you would enjoy that book as I did when I was younger."

Kit's grip on the book tightened. "But you know I cannot read," he seethed through gritted teeth.

Cassian smiled. "When you read this book, you will learn that every man, no matter his station, has the ability to contribute to society if he is given a chance to prove himself. I am giving you that chance, Kit."

Cassian could see the turmoil and embarrassment on Kit's face. "But I cannot read this book, sir!" he exclaimed.

"Then I shall teach you," replied Cassian calmly.

Kit clamped his mouth shut and stared at Cassian. "What?"

"Do you want be able to read, Kit?"

Kit's lip trembled as he nodded his head. "Yes, I do, sir," he whispered.

Was this how Faith felt when she was helping Cassian? Cassian felt as though he was truly about to change this boy's life with such a simple act. "Then you will come to my house three times a week from now on," he decided. "I will give you a lesson and then I will insist upon you staying for dinner."

For the first time, Cassian saw such a genuine smile spread across Kit's face. He looked back down at the book and flipped through the pages with such excitement in his eyes.

Men of all stations could do wonders if only they were given the opportunity. Cassian wondered what this boy would do.

Cassian gave Kit directions to his house, and instructions to come on Monday afternoon. Lastly, Cassian shrugged out of his coat. "You will grow into this within the month, I am sure. But you need a coat."

Cassian saw genuine gratefulness on Kit's face as he accepted the expensive coat. He slipped his arms inside and fixed the buttons. Cassian was right, it was a little big, but the boy needed something warmer than a calico shirt.

Cassian kicked the ball one last time. "I shall see you on Monday, Kit."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir," replied Kit cheerfully.