: if you've made it this far into my story, i just want to say thank you! it means so much to me that anyone would even think about reading my work! :))

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aesthetics

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Thorne Baxter

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Mia McHenry

★ ★ ★

I'm sure a lot of people feel invisible most of the time. Unseen. Unheard. A wallflower.

I'm not sure how many people actually like the feeling. It sounds crazy, doesn't it? How could a person possibly like to feel unnoticed? Why would anyone want to feel like they're just watching the world spin from afar?

I do. That may be an understatement. I embrace the feeling of invisibility I get when I'm walking the halls of my school. What a lot of people don't understand is that as long as you're invisible, there are no expectations. No pressure to be someone you're not. I can be comfortable being myself, knowing that no one is judging me. Because in order to be judged, you have to be seen. And no one sees you when you're invisible.

A lot of people don't understand my point of view. That's okay. I don't expect them to. Take one of my closest friends, Emmie, for example. She's basically the complete opposite of myself. She's loud, outgoing, and confident. She couldn't be a wallflower if she tried. She'll never understand why I'd rather be home on Friday night. She'll never understand why I always find myself being drawn toward the shadows. Maybe that's why we get along so well. After all, they do say opposites attract.

The sound of a whistle blowing resonates through my brain, reminding me that I'm supposed to be focused. I can hear coach Walker yelling instructions that I know I'm supposed to be listening to, his loud voice echoing throughout the gym.

"She's doing that thing again," Emmie says to our friend Saige with an annoyed eye roll.

"What thing?" I ask self-consciously. Is it possible that I have a "thing" that I don't know about? What is it? Do I, like, drool or something?

"That thing where you completely space out and ignore everyone," Saige informs me. Her dark eyebrows are drawn and she's smirking at me, and that's how I know my two best friends are making fun of me.

"I did not space," I mutter, racking my brain for an excuse—because I totally spaced. "I was just . . . thinking."

Emmie pulls her blond hair out of its ponytail, beginning to redo it tighter. Rolling her wide blue eyes, she asks, "What do you think spacing is, Mia?"

"Give her a break," Saige cuts in before I can respond. Her sleek black hair has already started to stick to her neck, letting me know I'm not the only one suffering through gym class. "I'd rather be spacing than running laps, too."

"Don't talk about running!" Emmie hisses. She discreetly turns her head to glance at coach Walker, returning her gaze to me and Saige as she says, "He might blow the whistle and then break will be over!"

"Sorry." Though Saige says the word apologetically enough, the eye roll she sends in my direction tells me she doesn't mean it. I can feel a smile tugging across my lips at her actions, holding in a laugh. It's moments like these, when I'm with my best friends, that I don't really feel so invisible anymore. Somehow, they manage to make even the worst thing in the world (gym class) fun.

With that, coach Walker blows his whistle again. Saige, Emmie, and I scramble to our feet reluctantly, pacing into a jog. Wednesday is conditioning day during PE, where we do stupid things like run circles around the gym. My feet already hurt, and by the way my hair starts to stick to my neck, I can tell I've worked up a sweat.

"I . . . hate . . . running," Emmie pants next to me, hanging her head.

"Oh, come on, Em," Saige chides. She gives me a knowing glance as she smirks at Emmie, shaking her head as she runs a pace faster than us. If I had to give each of us a title, it wouldn't be very hard. Emmie would be the outgoing one; the girl who makes friends easily. Saige would be the athletic one; she runs track for the school and plays competitive volleyball. And me . . . well, I guess I'd be the shy one.

"If you're going to brag, I don't want to talk to you." It takes Emmie a good five minutes to say the full sentence, but she manages to get the words out all the same. Saige only lets out an annoyed huff of breath, obviously frustrated by our lack of enthusiasm.

Just seconds later, Coach blows his whistle again. Everyone stops running simultaneously, boys and girls splitting into groups of two on our way to the locker rooms. I only have one more class to suffer through before I can finally head home, which isn't too bad.

"So, what are you guys up to after school?" Emmie asks once we're in the privacy of the back corner of the locker room, changing for fourth period.

"Track," Saige answers almost immediately, giving Emmie a smug look.

"Are you kidding?" Emmie raises her eyebrows at our friend, sounding exasperated. "You're going to do more running today?"

"Yeah." Saige smirks, her bright blue eyes dancing. "I know it's hard to believe, Em, but some people actually enjoy it. Plus, it's good for your butt." Saige turns around and shakes her backside as if to prove her point, making Emmie and I groan.

"What about you, Mia?" Emmie asks, turning to me. "Any special plans?"

"Not really." I frown as I shrug, shoving my gym clothes back into my bag. "Both of my parents are working late. I don't know. I guess I'll finish my chem homework."

"Another night in for Lil M," Emmie says in a sing-song tune. I roll my eyes at her teasing, not bothering to respond.

"Don't talk too soon, Emmie," Saige says, sticking up for me. I shoot her a grateful smile, which she returns with a slight nod. "What are you doing tonight?"

Emmie has one of those secret smiles on her lips that usually means she's going to be doing something with a boy. She looks me and Saige in the eyes, biting her bottom lip. "If you must know," she says like we've been begging to know what she's doing tonight. "I'm going out with Asher."

I get the feeling that Saige is also trying to hold in a groan. Asher is this boy Emmie's been off and on with for almost two months now, and Saige and I can hardly stand him. He's the wild type, if you know what I mean. Parties on school nights, alcohol in the morning. Saige and I both feel that he doesn't have Em's best interests at heart, but trying to convince Emmie of that is impossible.

"Asher again, huh?" Saige raises a dark eyebrow in question.

"We're going to see some band he likes," Emmie admits. "Before you two go fussing at me like my mother, know that it's nothing serious."

"That's the problem," Saige says with a frown. "We know nothing with Asher is ever serious."

Emmie bites her bottom lip as she smirks, her blue eyes holding a dangerous gleam. "Some things are."

"Emmie!" I gasp, smacking her arm. "Ew!"

Emmie rolls her eyes at me, her smirk widening. "You're such a baby, Lil M."

"I am not." I hug myself, rocking on my heels. "I just prefer not to know about your personal life, Em."

"I'm with Mia on this one," Saige says, slamming her locker shut. "Some things you just keep to yourself, Em."

Emmie rolls her eyes once again, grabbing her gym bag. "Whatever. Peace, you prunes!" With that, Emmie turns her back on us, sashaying out of the locker room in true Emmie fashion.

"What a diva," Saige teases, her bright eyes meeting my hazel. She gives me a small, knowing smile, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "You ready to go?"

I return her smile, tucking my hair behind my ear. "Ready as I'll ever be."

★ ★ ★

When fourth period (chemistry, for me) finally ends, it's like a weight is being lifted off of my shoulders. I weave my way through the crowded halls, making my way out of the school building in record time.

Reaching my car, I can feel the stress of the day slowly fading to nothing. Now that school's over, I can finally relax. My mind starts to clear, no longer thinking about all the things I need to get done and all the due dates I need to remember. The ride home is probably my favorite part of the day, because it's the only time I don't have to really think about anything. I can sit in the car, listen to music, and just . . . be. It's calming in a way I can't really put into words.

Around me, kids gather in groups scattered across the parking lot, talking to their friends. Cars begin to back out of parking spaces, disappearing down the road. Slowly but surely, students filter out of the school building. In just an hour or two, it will be empty.

Just as I'm climbing into my car, something catches my eye. I pause for a moment, studying the person closely. I'm not quite sure why my gaze lands on him, and I'm definitely not sure why I can't seem to pull my gaze away. From what I can tell, he's just a regular boy. He has dark brown hair, olive skin, and surprisingly bright green eyes. He wears a black hoodie, and ripped jeans in the same color. He's talking to someone, but I can't see who. The boy blocks them from my view. He looks just like any other guy at my school, I guess, only I don't believe I've seen him before. He doesn't look familiar. I mean, this town isn't that big. Neither is the school. And I've lived here my whole life. I'm sure I would have noticed him before.

Suddenly, the boy's gaze lifts. His eyes meet mine instantly, taking me in for a moment. Shoot, I think, blinking. He caught me staring. I don't know what I'm expecting to happen next. I guess I'm just waiting for the boy's gaze to pull away from mine and drift off to something else. After all, that's what normally happens when you're self-declaredly invisible.

Instead, his gaze stays on me for a good few seconds longer. I can see his lips slowly curling into a smirk. He gives me a little nod, and then he winks. He winks. At me. Which means he sees me. Staring at him. Like a lunatic.

With that thought, I quickly fall into my seat and slam my car door shut. I don't waste time pulling out of my parking space and driving out of the parking lot, taking the short route home. My cheeks are burning. My heart is pounding. My palms are sweating. And none of this is the scariest part.

The scariest part is that—just for a moment—when the boy's eyes were on me, I didn't feel so invisible.

And I didn't entirely hate the feeling.

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: thank you again for reading! this was kind of a background chapter to let you get to know the main character a little before diving into the story. i swear it gets better! ;)