《His Flower》32: Abuse
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After running back home, I was utterly breathless. The conversation, or rather, the fight between Antonio and me continuously replayed in my head.
I yearned to know what he was thinking. Was he annoyed that I ran away? Hurt that I hadn't addressed his feelings? Shocked that I realized he was being abused?
My stomach churned at all three, mostly at the thought of Antonio being abused. He'd informed me that he was staying at Benny's place for the next few days. I was certainly relieved he'd be safe for the time being, but it was just a temporary fix. What would happen when he had to move back home with his father? Was I supposed to just turn a blind eye, knowing I'd done nothing to help him from the violence he was facing?
I wondered if Romano knew about the abuse. If he was getting abused too. The thought made me want to cry and hug him forever.
Exhaustion overtaking me, I trudged onto the front porch of my house. The lights were off, which was rather unusual.
"Jo," I croaked through the darkness, kicking off my creased shoes. I flickered on the hallway light. "You won't believe what just hap–"
Jo was sitting on the couch in the living room. Tissues surrounded her, and black mascara was smeared underneath her eyelids. With her messy bun and disheveled clothes, I could tell something bad had happened.
"Jo!" I ran over and sat down next to her. "What happened?"
She peered at me with misery. I rarely ever saw my aunt cry like this. "It's Bob."
I froze, fearing the worst. "Was there an accident? Did he get hurt?"
"No," she wailed, "he proposed!"
I unsurely scratched at my curls. "Oh... so these are tears of joy?"
"No," she rapidly shook her head. "I told him no. We broke up."
"You told him no?" I gasped, taken aback.
"Yes! I mean, what was he thinking? Marriage?"
"I thought you loved him."
"I do, but marriage is a life-long commitment. I don't know if I'm ready for that."
I nodded. It wasn't all too difficult to understand where Jo was coming from, but I felt a little sad nonetheless. I'd been looking forward to having Benny as a step-brother.
"It'll be fine," I softly muttered after a moment, leaning in to hug her.
Jo closed her eyes and leaned her head against mine. The embrace didn't last more than a second. "No, it won't." She suddenly stood up, crumpled tissues falling off her lap. "We have to get out of here."
I drew my eyebrows together. "Well, it's late, but maybe we can go to the diner–"
"No," she interrupted. "I mean, we have to leave this town."
"Not this again," I groaned.
"I mean it this time—we've lived in Burnsley for months now."
"Months?" I repeated in disbelief. "That's not long at all. Some people live in the same place their entire lives. You need to stop running away from your problems."
"But I can't face him at work. It'll be horrible," she whined. "I'm gonna browse at different houses online."
Before I could say another word, Jo had left the room. I sighed and flickered on the television. It was the first time I hadn't laughed at a comedy.
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• • •
I'd stayed up all night thinking about Antonio. And the night after. It wasn't until Sunday morning that I realized I couldn't possibly go on like this. It was stupid of me to even think I could possibly sever our peculiar friendship. How could I, when every fiber in my body had grown fond of him?
Before I could convince myself not to, I rode my bike over to Benny's house. It took five doorbell rings and two let-me-ins before the colossal door finally swung open.
"Rose?" The irritation fell from Benny's face once he realized it was just me. "What are you doing here?"
"Is Antonio home?"
A look of realization dawned across his face and he smirked, nodding. "Come on in."
I walked inside. His house was quite large—almost the same size as Antonio's.
"Did you hear what happened with Dad and Jo?" Benny asked from behind me, shoving his hands into the pockets of his colored sweatpants.
I glanced at him with a frown. "Yeah. I guess we won't be step-siblings after all."
Benny shrugged. "I'll always be your bro."
I smiled. He was quite a loyal guy, so it didn't surprise me when he next said, "I didn't know it was possible for Antonio to be so hung up on a girl. Just don't..."
"... Pull a Jo?" I finished for him. He grimaced and reluctantly nodded. "I wouldn't dream of it."
"I know, I trust you." He looked like he meant it. "Really, the two of you were made for each other."
"We're not together," I couldn't help but declare.
"Anyways," Benny rolled his eyes. "Antonio's been through enough. He may act tough, but he's just a teddy bear on the inside."
"Sounds like someone I know, Benny Bear."
Benny shook his head at the sly grin on my face.
I wondered if he knew Antonio was being abused. Though, I wasn't going to ask. I didn't get the chance to anyways, because a loud drawl from the top of the stairs made our heads snap up.
"You guys done talking about me?"
Antonio strolled down the grand staircase. He wore a white tee and black sweatpants. It was a phenomenon that he was able to make such simple attire look so enticing.
It was the first time we'd seen each other since the horrid fight—since Antonio had blurted out his intimate feelings for me. By the casual look on his face, I could tell he wasn't going to act any differently around me. Thus, I decided I wasn't going to bring up his confession. Not yet, at least. There were more important things to talk about, like his abusive father.
"Well, I'll leave you kids to it," Benny shamelessly walked off.
I could hear the sound of him resuming whatever television show he'd been occupying himself with.
"What are you doing here?" Antonio bluntly asked me once Benny left.
"Just... checking up," I slowly replied, unoffended by his abrasiveness. "Things got heated on Friday. I just wanted to make sure we were okay."
I waited with baited breath for his response. There were two ways this could go. He could be angry—which was understanding, given the fact that I'd walked away from him—or he could be his usual egotistical and annoying self. To my utter relief, he went with the second.
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"You can't go one weekend without seeing me, can you?" he smirked.
"Mhm, sure," I crossed my arms.
"Didn't take you for the clingy type."
Although he was clearly teasing me, was this his way of deflecting the conversation?
"Benny and I planned on heading out to the arcade. You should co–"
"Are you okay?" I blurted out.
Antonio sighed, knowing the conversation had taken its inevitable turn. He glanced around, perhaps to make sure no one was listening, and then jerked his head.
"C'mon. Let's go upstairs."
I followed after him as he led me to a bedroom. I noticed that Benny's house had a similar layout to Antonio's, likely because they lived in the same luxurious neighborhood.
"Whose room is this?" I asked.
"Mine."
"You have your own room at Benny's house?" I raised my eyebrows.
"Yup. I'm here that often," he answered.
Antonio closed the door behind him. I turned around to face him, and he suddenly began to pry off his shirt.
"Woah, what are you doing?"
"Relax. You asked if I'm okay, so I'm showing you."
He proceeded to lift up his top. I swallowed at the sight of his abs and forced myself to stay focused. There were bandages across his injured stomach. The bruises were slightly fading, but still very much present. I lightly traced one of them with my fingers, and he sharply inhaled at my touch.
"Does that hurt?"
"No," he answered honestly.
I pleasantly nodded as he tugged his shirt back down. "You don't have to tell me anything else about the abuse. Not if it makes you uncomfortable."
Antonio exhaled and collapsed onto the bed. He gestured me over and I reluctantly sat next to him on the plush blanket, fiddling with my fingers.
"I've been thinking about it a lot. And I wanna tell you," he hoarsely admitted, looking up at the ceiling. "I just don't know if I should."
We were quiet for a long moment. I eventually gazed at him with pure sincerity. "You can tell me anything."
I really meant it. I wasn't the type to go running the seconds things got tough.
Antonio licked his lips and nodded. He was hiding it well, but I could tell he was slightly nervous. "Ask me anything, and I'll try answering."
I shifted to lie down beside him.
"Does your dad hurt you like that often?"
He shook his head. "Nah, never to that extent. Just when I get into major trouble."
I frowned. "Does Romano even know? Does he get hit too?"
"No to both," Antonio said. "I'd kill my dad if he ever laid a hand on Ro."
A shiver ran down my spine. It was good to know that Antonio was protecting his cousin, but who was there to protect him?
"But how could Romano possibly not know? Don't you two live together?" I asked with a creased forehead.
"My dad's never home–he leaves early in the morning, comes back late in the night, and sometimes even stays in hotels. When he's home, I do my best to avoid him. It's why I'm always at the spot. But sometimes, I get unlucky and run into him, and..." he scornfully trailed off. "He only hurts me when I'm alone and no one's there to help. Romano just thinks I get into fights often, and that's why I'm all bruised up."
It suddenly made sense. The spot was an escape for Antonio–an escape from his dad. I shuddered. "Your father is sick."
"You're telling me," Antonio laughed.
I couldn't muster a laugh back, and rolled over to hug him. He remained still, but his arm wrapped around me after a few seconds.
"You don't deserve this." I was mad and frustrated and sad all at once.
He was silent, but I could feel his chest moving as he breathed, the only indication that he was listening.
"Does anybody else know?"
Antonio stiffened at my question. "Just Benny."
It made sense. The two of them were as close as brothers.
"What are we gonna do?" I asked.
"We?" Antonio repeated.
"Well, yes," I sat up. "We need to tell someone what's going on, so they can—"
"—Help?" he bitterly cut me off. "No one's gonna care—if they even believe me, that is."
"Why would anyone not believe you? Your bruises are evidence of what's happening."
"Listen," Antonio shook his head. "My father has power. He's one of the richest men in this town. He could get away with something like this. Trust me, it'd only make things worse."
"So we aren't gonna do anything?" I asked in shock.
It wasn't right that his father was able to get away with this. And while it wasn't my responsibility to intervene, I simply wanted to. Antonio deserved better than this, and I cared way too much about him to not help.
"You keep saying we, like this is our problem," he snapped, sitting up. "If I knew you planned on doing something, I wouldn't have told you anything."
I sat up too.
"Well, he can't exactly get away with this," I furrowed my eyebrows.
"Don't be naïve," Antonio scoffed. "That's the way things are sometimes. Not all of us can have perfect lives."
"Naïve? I am anything but naïve," I was angry now. "I know life isn't perfect, but that doesn't mean some things can't be fixed."
He didn't need to say a word. By the look on his face, I could tell he believed my life was all sunshine and rainbows.
"You don't know what I've been through," I stood up.
Antonio chuckled, but it wasn't at all humorous. "Oh, please. You wouldn't understand what it's like for me."
"But I do," I insisted.
I knew what it was like to feel betrayed and abandoned by the one person who was supposed to protect you. I knew what it was like to feel alone. I knew what it was like to want an escape.
"Spare me the made up sob story." His words made me flinch. "You don't even realize how good you've got it. At least you've got a mother—"
"Mother?" I interrupted in disbelief. "Are you serious?"
I began to walk towards the door before I said something I'd regret, though it was too late. With narrowed eyes, I revealed the truth I'd worked so hard to conceal from him.
"My mom is dead."
I never quite got to see his reaction, because I ran out before he could say a word.
• • •
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