《His Flower》24: Perspectives
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Flower. It's the perfect nickname for her.
Most people believed I dubbed her Flower due to her name, Rose. Perhaps that was a leading factor, but it certainly wasn't the only reason.
When Rose and I had first met, she'd crashed into me and fallen onto the ground. I remembered the occurrence as vividly as ever. She'd looked so tiny and frail—so delicate and soft, much like a flower.
Now that I got to learn more about Rose, I realized that she was anything but. She was snarky and fierce, always ready with a comeback. I liked that about her... she wasn't intimidated by me like everyone else. In fact, I recalled her calling me a jerk on the first day of school.
What was it about her that enchanted me? With her perfect curls, her smooth skin, and her contagious smile, it was undeniable that Rose was quite literally the prettiest girl I'd ever seen. Looks aside, it was simply easy to talk to her. Rose knew more about my twisted relationship with my father than almost anyone else did. There was still a lot she had yet to uncover. Regardless, she was quickly being added to the list of people I actually liked in this town, and trust me, it's a short list.
The day that we–or rather, I–had gone swimming, I knew something was up with her. The way she'd kicked and screamed told me enough. Of course, some people disliked swimming, but her fear was different. She seemed... traumatized.
I wanted to help her, but I didn't know how. After all, I was partly responsible for the little freak out she had. If only I had left her alone like she'd asked me to.
However, it was simply impossible for me to stay away from Rose. The temptation went beyond her captivating personality—she was so painfully naïve to how attractive she looked, especially at this stupid Halloween party. With that tiny cheerleading skirt that had her smooth legs on full display, I had to refrain from letting my eyes linger for too long.
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Unfortunately, I wasn't the only guy who noticed. Many had been watching her as she danced and sung. It was hard not to notice—her aura was simply fascinating. She was just too blind to see it.
Ethan was a buddy of mine from school. Though, could I really call him that? Because he felt like more of a follower than anything. Buddy—follower—whatever—it took everything in me not to snap the guy's neck off as I watched him openly flirt with her. All I could do was glower from the corner, miserable at the fact that Rose was actually giving the prick the time of day.
Every muscle in my body stiffened when she put her arms around his neck and began to dance with him. For a moment, I envisioned that it was me that she was touching instead of him. I imagined that she would stand on her tiptoes, sling an arm across my chest, lean in real close, bat those long eyelashes she had, and finally, close the distance between us.
A low groan inevitably escaped my lips at the thought of what could've been. I'd almost kissed Rose the other night at the spot. However frustrated I was that she'd leaned away, I was also glad. She deserved better than me. There was so much she didn't know–so much she could never find out. It was better that way. A girl as perfect as her was only bound to be corrupted by a guy as damaged as me.
I could tell she had growing concerns for me. Like, why do I have bruises so often? Why do I seem to hate my father? Why do I go to the spot–what could I possibly need an escape for? Isn't my life perfect?
They were unspoken questions, but I knew she wondered them regardless. I could practically read every thought that went on in that intricate head of her's. It wasn't fair for me to worry her—to burden her.
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I knew I had to distance myself from her.
It was the reason why I clarified to her that we'd remain as friends. Because anything more, and I'd end up hurting her. So however much I currently hated Ethan for flirting with Rose, I wasn't going to intervene. At least he was making her smile.
Besides, what right did I have to be upset about it? She wasn't mine...
"You good, bro?" Benny asked.
I dragged my eyes away from Rose and Ethan towards Benny. I didn't even realize he had approached me.
"Yeah," I lied.
Benny was unconvinced. He knew me too well. Following my line of sight, his eyes made his way over to Rose and Ethan.
"What's she doing with that prick?" he sneered.
It was a little amusing to see Benny acting all brotherly towards Rose.
His dark eyes switched from them to me. "Are you sure you're good?"
"Yes, father." I jokingly rolled my eyes. "I think I'm actually gonna step out for a smoke."
Sensing that I wasn't in much of a talking mood, Benny nodded. "Alright, you know where to find me."
"Mhm," I murmured. "Keep an eye on her, yeah?"
He didn't need to ask who her was. We both knew I was talking about Flower. With one last nod and an unreadable grin, Benny turned around and made his way over to his girlfriend, Tabitha. He pecked her lips and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, as they conversed with a couple of kids from school.
I looked down at my shoes thoughtfully. The tiniest part of me wondered if I'd ever have a relationship like Benny and Tabitha's. Something meaningful and long-term.
The idea almost made me laugh. It wasn't going to happen–maybe in another universe. All I'd ever experienced were meaningless flings and stupid hook-ups. And so I looked up at Rose once more. Her dainty hands were around Ethan's neck and she began to lean in to kiss him.
"I can't watch this," I muttered to myself, hands practically twitching in yearn to smoke.
With that, I left the party, alone as usual.
• • •
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