I was now in a taxi on my way to CJ's house. It wasn't that late and her helper knew me, she'd just let me in. I paid the driver and buzzed the gate looking into the camera so they could recognize my face, I didn't have the pin code for the gate. I waited a few seconds and the gate buzzed to life allowing me access to the expertly paved lengthy driveway and perfectly manicured lawns. I hugged my arms around me and the helper, Ms Sharon, already had the door open waiting for me to come in. I greeted her and walked into the house. I made my way to the kitchen taking up two spoons and took the ice cream from the freezer, it was non dairy ice cream but it still kicked ass. I walked up the first flight of steps before taking off my heels and running up the next flight. I was standing in front of CJ's door trying to catch my breath before going in.

I turned the knob and pushed the door in, the room was dark and all I could hear was the low hum of the AC. I sighed and made my way over to her mini fridge shoving the ice cream tub in and resting the spoons on top. I stripped down to my Nike tights and slowly ripped the tape strips off of me, I went to her bathroom to wash the makeup from my face and to tie my hair up then I went to lie beside her. I cuddled up on her side under the covers pulling her into my arms, her sleeping body covering me with the warmth and comfort that I needed. I kissed her forehead and cried myself to sleep. I'd tell her everything tomorrow, maybe then she can officially breakup with me face to face.

The sun didn't seep through her drapes, just how I loved it. She was still cuddled into my side when I woke up, I stretched over to get my phone so I could see the time and it was after 11 in the morning. I stayed in the same position once again admiring her beauty as I did majority of the mornings I woke up here. Her hair was still straight, just like how she preferred it and she also preferred to leave it loose while she sleeps. I moved the stray hair behind her ears so that I could see her face better, that song was definitely right; loving you is easy because you're beautiful and her beauty didn't stop skin deep. She was the embodiment of a beautiful soul and I was the thorns wrapped around her rose. You'd think that being the offspring of a multimillion dollars record label holder you'd have the biggest ego in the world but she didn't because her father made her work for whatever she wanted, I got my Jeep easily but she had to work for the Jaguar that she's driving now and her allowance depended on her grades. She wasn't exactly humble but she was grounded and I loved that about her.

"I've gotten so used to waking up to your stares I don't feel awkward anymore," she said to me and I chuckled.

"You're beautiful," I said kissing her forehead.

"And you're deep," she said moving out of my arms going to her bathroom.

I followed behind her and stepped into the shower, she handed me my toothbrush with toothpaste and I handed it back once I was through. She stepped into the shower behind me kissing my neck. I turned around and began soaping her up slowly backing her up against the wall.

"I think we have unfinished business," I said to her.

Her bathroom had a small ledge wide enough for her to sit on, she pushed her body wash and scrubs to the side so that she could sit and open her legs for me. It would be a regular for us to give each other scrubs then fuck in the shower, this shower held so many memories for us. Ms Sharon was completely shaken up when she found a dildo stuck to the wall telling her hello when she came to clean the bathroom once, it was funny but her dad scolded us about it and I felt the weight of his presence that day. He even agreed it was funny but it was also traumatic for the poor lady.

I went onto my knees bringing her leg over my shoulder, I wasted no time as I quickly sucked her clit between my lips and she let out a loud moan. She tightly held onto the bun at the top of my head and pushed my face further between her legs. I continued sucking on her clit while humming and moaning ever so often when she tugged at my hair. I couldn't get low enough to tongue fuck her so I rammed two fingers into her not breaking contact with her clit. She screamed out and pushed her hips up higher so that I could get better access, I pumped my fingers into her fast while roughly sucking on her clit. She was grinding onto my face intensifying her own pleasure.

"Zim," she moaned out.

"Mhmm??" I responded without breaking the momentum.

"Ahh fuck, I love you." She said and I knew she was about to cum.

Her walls clamped around my fingers and I wasn't able to move them so instead I curled my fingers and roughly wiggled them around while I continued to suck on her clit. She was moaning uncontrollably as she rode her orgasm out on my tongue. Once she settled down, I pulled my fingers out sticking them into my mouth. After cleaning them off I went to lick up and down her slit feeling her tremble under my fingers. I stood up and went under the shower washing myself off, I went back to her and helped her up so that she could wash off and get out of the shower. I wrapped her up in her towel and dried myself off, I walked back into her room going to the draw where I kept my stuff taking out boxers, shorts and a tank top. I got dressed and waited on her to do the same so we could go downstairs for lunch since it was pass breakfast and brunch time. Her family is vegan and I honestly loved what the chef cooked every time. I decided that I'd tell her everything while we ate.

While we sat around the large dining table eating I stole small peeks at her. She was concentrating hard on something and I knew it wasn't long before she said what was on her mind.

"I got accepted to QU in Canada and I think ima go," She said mentioning the school that we both applied for, all of the schools we sent applications to it was together.

"Well I haven't checked my emails as yet to know, anyone else got back to you?" I asked and she shook her head no.

I nodded in response and continued eating my food. It was our plan to go away to school together so that I could finally be myself and we could be happy, we'd get an apartment close by so that we didn't have to stay on campus and we'd start our lives together away from our parents well more like away from mine.

"I have something to tell you," I said. She gave me a quizzical look and put her fork down.

"I got some news last night at the dinner and I'm not sure how to process it right now," I looked up at her.

"Let me hear it and we'll figure it out together," she said taking a sip of her coffee.

"My parents have signed my life away in a contract three years ago," I took a deep breath.

"Three years ago as in when all of this elite princess bullshit started when you were 15?" She asked.

I nodded and said, "I don't know what to do Carter Jones, I'm afraid." Those same damn tears from last night threatened my eyeballs again.

"Woah, don't cry pops. I've never seen you cry." She said and she was right. The years she's known me I've never cried.

I fell off of my bicycle in front of her gate while she and her father were driving out, they got out of the car to help me up and even with the blood dripping down my skinny legs I didn't cry. I just smiled and walked back to my bicycle riding away, I think that's when we officially met. We lived a couple streets away from each other in this huge community with wide mansions and green landscapes.

"I don't know what to do," I said again.

"Do you know what's in the contract?" She asked and I nodded not responding.

"Is it a debt they have to pay off? Because I can help you with that." She asked and I shook my head no.

"Is it the law firm? Did he make a deal with the devil to keep a criminal out of court? But why would your mother agree to that?" She asked me and I shook my head no again.

"She'd do anything. She loves money and will do anything to maintain the lifestyle she's living now." I said with a sigh.

"Before I start crying, tell me what's in the contract Zim." She said running her hands through her hair.

"The contract is between them and an African family. They want to open a law firm for themselves and have it operate as family oriented." I said to her. She wanted to study law, this was her passion.

"This can't be right," she said. "If my calculations are right they need to both be connected as family in some way for the business to be registered under a family oriented platform..." she trailed off and I nodded finally feeling the first tear fall from my eye.

"Please tell me that you have some long lost family member from Africa," she said. I heard the break in her voice. She was very sensitive, her tear glands worked for the both of us in situations where I was supposed to be crying. She's an empath. She carries my emotions like her own but right now I had to feel the weight of the present for myself.

I shook my head and used my hands to support my head as the tears continued streaming down my face. In the moment, it was all I could do. I could only allow the tears to free fall from my tear glands and land comfortably on my cheeks before finding their way down my face in a slow and morbid race.

"Did you mean what you said last night? When you said that you couldn't do this anymore?" I asked.

"No, I could never. I just wanted to know your response to see if you would really fight for me and when I woke up to your beautiful eyes I knew that there was nowhere I could go in this world without you beside me. I love you okay, you're the only love I've ever know." She said holding my face with her soft hands.

And she was the only love I've ever known too but would this love be enough to keep us together with the heavy weight the knowledge of the arranged marriage had?

"There's no way that I can get out of this marriage CJ, it has been in the making since I was 15." I shook my head.

"We should've known Asante Twi and French were a bit too specific, we avoided the signs." Her sigh was heavy.

I stayed silent. She loved it when I practiced my French with her, said she felt and understood why they called it the language of love.

"Runaway with me," she said looking into my eyes.

"Carter..." I started but no other words came.

She got out of her seat and knelt beside my chair holding my face with both of her hands.

"Please Zidania, I can't live without you and I cant bear to see you in someone else's arms knowing no one else can ever love you like I can and no one else should get the chance to love you because you are mine and only mine." Her voice held a possessive passion and with tears running down her face it was hard to deny her but I had to stay loyal to my family.

"You know I can't do that," I whispered softly.

"You can't or you won't?" She said getting angry.

"I love you," I tried convincing us both.

"You don't love me, if you did you wouldn't want to see me hurt." She said completely breaking down.

"I'm hurting too." And it was the truth, Carter Jones was comfortable and I loved that comfort.

"Yet you're the one that's marrying someone else." Those words and the bitterness in her voice broke my heart, they ripped it into halves then ripped it again. It didn't stop ripping until it was nothing but smalls bits and pieces.

"You don't understand," I tried to explain.

"No, I completely understand. I can't ask you to choose between me and your family. Please leave," she said getting up from her knees.

"Cj.." I knew my voice held desperation.

"I asked you to leave." She didn't look at, she stared at the ground as if trying to retain her anger.

I got up from my place at the table and went over to where she was standing. I moved to touch her but she stepped away, hurt and anger the only expressions on her face. What have I done?

"Please, I need you.." My voice was soft and needy.

"NO! You don't !!! Now get out of my house before I have to use force, GET OUT, GET OUT!!" She started screaming at me and attacked the chair. She tore the legs off and began beating the chair with one of its legs.

Fortunately, I had my phone on me so I didn't have to go upstairs for it. I slowly walked out of the dining room tears still racing down my face but this time they fell faster and I had to blink to clearly see ahead of me. I passed the entertainment room and stopped to look behind me, I couldn't see her now but I knew she was probably on the ground now beside the chair. I could no longer hear the abuse on the furniture so I knew she had worn herself out. I stepped into the foyer and Ms Sharon was there with her head held low standing with the door open. I bid her farewell and she nodded in response. I was walking down the steps when I heard her clear her throat.

"My child," she said. "I heard and I believe you should do what you're heart is telling you to do." She quickly closed the door behind her.

How could I? When my heart was with Carter Jones, the love of my life but my loyalty was with my family? I could never let down Richard after everything he's done for me, I couldn't seem ungrateful now. I held my head down walking to the large wrought iron gate, I counted the steps it took me to leave the driveway. I might've lost count after 150 because my thoughts were clouded with hurt but I knew that was over 150 steps away from my love. I should turn back and agree to runaway with her but my legs kept me moving forward. Once I stepped onto the street I started counting the steps it took me to reach home, it was the only thing keeping me from breaking down on the street in front of the judgmental gazes of the rich and mighty. I've never walked the distance home before but I guess there was a first time for everything.

It's what I've been telling myself since I was 15 years old.