Warning: Abuse

I was eating sa cafeteria when I saw my crush, yes, doktor siya! I'm an art student na 2nd year pero nandito ako nakatambay sa biology department. Nagulat ako nang binatukan ako ng friend kong si Omi. Tanong mo sa kaibigan mo. Your friend made reklamos.

You shushed her and continued watching.

You didn't know why you've taken an interest on her. You didn't like popular girls naman, you were just a nerd na mahilig sa house lang mag-stay but she made you take all the new things. Didn't know if you are in love with her or just infatuated or really just in love with the idea being with her.

You made your way out na sa cafeteria dahil pupunta ka na sa building niyo.

-

2 months later..

"Tsk, girl I don't date women at if ever I'll date one, that won't be you." Napahiya ka naman sa sinabi ni Doctor Tricia. It really hurts kasi she brought you sa harap ng ibang tao even though you wanted your confession to be in private. She said as you knew everybody heard it.

She walked out and you were left alone with the coffee that you brought na gusto niya together with the bread she likes. Your friend made the way inside the crowd.

"You've got to stop, she's toxic." She said. Umiling ka naman and said otherwise, You said.

Sambit ng kaibigan mo.

"Eh baka lang naman may chance ako." Sabi ko sa kanya as I was pouting.

-

Another day for rejection

I got called ugly today, I got insulted by people and I became the joke of the town.

Pinagmumura ka na and yet you were still smiling at her kasi you knew na despite her tough aura, you knew na she has a good heart she helps other people lalo na sa mga bahay-ampunan kasi you volunteer there too.

Tricia has a good heart despite the rumors about her.

You accepted what she said, you never felt beautiful kasi nga you didn't have the time to think about your appearance dahil you were busy with school. "No one will love you if you kept doing that. Urgh!" Another day, another slay sa heart. This time iyong mga food and gifts na binigay mo, she threw it all away.

-

1 month later...

"Y/N! 'Di ka talaga titino?" You shook your head sa remark ng friend mo. "Bahala ka riyan! Saka ka na bumalik sa akin kapag maayos na pag-iisip mo! Ka-imbyerna pati akez nadadamay."

"I never told you to join me." You said trying to protect her from the bullies. Now, your friend had left you too.

Araw-araw pinadarama sa iyo ni Patricia na hindi ka niya gusto at kalait-lait ka.

People threw eggs at you, flour sometimes and muntik ka na mamatay nang may naglaglag ng brick kung hindi ka lang tinulak ni Tricia.

"Get off of my way, Y/N." She said but you knew na she saw the brick almost fall unto you

-

For the past few days ay ganoon pa rin ang nangyayari, but today was different.

"Hi po Ms. Tricia." Bati mo kay Tricia. She never bat an eye to you, you were like an air.

Dumeretso lang si Gaga. You decided to leave her muna and put the letter sa locker niya.

A letter na walang name.

It says there,

-

Another day at nasa Bahay-ampunan ka nanaman. You swept the floors and helped fed the children, Tanong ng bata. "Kasi may nagpapangiti sa akin." Sagot ni Y/N.

Jonathan said. Tawa ni Y/N.

Tanong ni Jonathan. Sabi ni Y/N.

"Kahit na nasasaktan ka?" Tanong ng bata na parang matanda kung magtanong. Tumango ka na lang.

You hated how you can't grasp onto others for comfort, they all left you.

You were around others but they were never around for you, it hurts but ganoon naman talaga, you chose to understand why their actions were like that.

Insulting, yes but you knew the reason, therefore you had to judge everything before judging their actions.

Your muni-muni was cut-off by Tricia crying. She was holding a picture.

Bati mo. "Doon ka na, maabala pa kita." Sabi niya.

"Nah, I'd rather hear you out. I can lend an ear." You smiled sincerely.

She said.

"Well losing someone you love really hurts but your feelings are valid so it's okay to cry and be vulnerable when it's about someone you love." You said.

"Oh ito, tokneneng." You randomly gave it to her and she was confused. "Ang random mo pero thank you." She answered.

-

Nang matapos mo magvolunteer ay umuwi ka muna sa bahay mo. Your very shitty home.

Bungad ng nanay mo at nagulat ka ng sinampal ka ng tatay mo.

'Yes, my temporary happiness when I see Ms. Tricia has a price.'

Was all you could say. Kaya you were fine with such insulting words kasi it started with your parents.

Sigaw ng ama mo, if they still treat you as their child pa nga.

Maybe that's why you tried to seek validation from others. Your dad punched you in the gut, it hurts like shit.

You were always pale, thin, and very fragile, maraming sakit and allergies.

"Ano bang mali sa pagpapalaki namin sa'yo!? We provided you everything!" Sigaw ng ama mo.

Your mom said. 'Ah yes, the golden boy in the family.' It was always about him, ever since na nawala si kuya na prumoprotekta sa akin, I was the one who got the blame for his death.

"S-Sorry po." Was all you could say kasi napalakas suntok ng dad mo.

You were about to faint kaya tumakbo ka sa labas and hinahabol ka ng parents mo.

'Hays hindi pa nga magaling katawan ko eh.'

You never let anyone know kung ano nangyayari sa iyo sa bahay.

Pumara ka ng taxi at sinakyan iyon. "O-Ospital po." You said as it was getting harder to breathe.

-

Pagkapunta niyo sa ospital ay inilagay ka na sa stretcher. You kept hearing voices and someone crying.

Nang binuksan ang damit mo, they were mortified of what they had seen.

Multiple bruises puro sugat sa upper body, to hide 'yung bruises at galos you always wore long sleeves.

Then you passed out.

-

Umalis ka na sa kwarto mo as you gave your card sa receptionist. You wanted to go to school, to see her.

Baliw ka na ba? Medyo.

You rode a taxi para pumunta roon together with your bag. Exactly pagkababa mo'y nakasalubong mo siya. Naka-polo ulit siya na pink tucked in with high-waist jeans.

She always looked good.

You said politely.

"Ano ba Y/N?! Bumitaw ka na nga." She said.

That was the indication na bibitawan mo na siya. You said.

She said and you nodded.

You smiled at her, you didn't want to go home kasi natatakot ka sa mga magulang mo.

-

You went and stayed sa seaside after ng class mo and bought your food since 5pm pa lang.

You didn't bother to change your uniform.

You waited until she got there.

-

"Let's get this over with." She said.

"Ano ba gusto mo kainin?" Tanong mo sa matangkad na babae.

She just shrugged as an answer.

"Is it okay to eat dito? Heto kasi paborito ko with my brother." You smiled when you pointed the restaurant.

Tumango siya and you guys ordered inside.

"So I've been hearing things--"

"Na ano marami ako jowa?! Nonsense." She defensively say. You retaliated.

"I'm sorry, yes, it is true na mahilig ako mag-instruments." She said.

You said.

"Really?! Anong kanta gusto mo sa kanila?" She excitingly asked.

You said. "Their songs are a masterpiece." She said and you nodded in agreement.

After you ate with Tricia, you decided to surprise her sa isang studio na rent for instruments and you guys played non-stop.

She sang looking in your eyes.

"Cause all that really matters is that I love you, I really do." She sang again.

Oh, I need you, and I really hate it

You sang.

-

After you two had a date, she insisted na ihatid ka sa bahay niyo.

You were reluctant but you let her anyway.

"I'm happy Y/N thank you."

"Don't mention it, after all I keep my promises. Thank you for making me happy." You smiled at her.

"Oh no problem." She said and patted you as you tried to hide na you winced in pain kasi natamaan sugat mo.

Nagising ka and your body was sore from the abuse from your parents.

Blaming you that you were the one who got your brother killed.

Instead of crying again to sleep, you decided to go to school, you should not love Tricia anymore and avoid her at all costs because you keep your word.

-

"Oi Y/N!" Tawag sa'yo ng friend mong si Simoun who is a transferee.

"Luh, how'd you get here?" You asked. Inakbayan ka naman niya and it hurts so bad but you quietly scream in pain.

"Oh ba't parang natatae ka? Hahahaha! Anyway, bio student na ako ngayon." He said and you could only nod.

-

'Waw ha! Ambilis maka-move on may substitute na pala." Someone said at nagngit-ngit sa galit.

-

A week later you get teased and called the girlfriend of Simoun kasi people saw how you guys were so close.

"Oi Simoun! Jowa mo pre!" The guy in bio said. 'Oh ka-section niya pala si Tricia.' You thought. You caught Tricia looking at you and umiwas ka na ng tingin baka kasi magalit.

Kinaladkadkad ka ni Simoun papuntang garden and asked if how was your brother. You told him what had happened and cried.

He hugged you and it didn't go unnoticed by someone.

'Sa garden pa talaga maglalandian, kadiri! It should be me! Nobody else.'

She spat out in disgust.

-

Received 10:01 pm.

You got shocked when you received a text from an unfamiliar number.

It was night and dark outside kaya you were creeped out and stopped studying.

"Sino kaya 'to." You replied to her and she answered that she was Tricia. You excitedly got down but was discovered by your drunk dad. 'Shit may cctv nga pala sa kwarto!' You thought and was scared.

Sampal sa'yo ng tatay mo, he punched and kicked you in the gut.

"Malandi ka talaga! Sino kikitain mo!?" He was furious and continued 'til you spat out blood.

Your nose is bleeding.

He spat out and it hurts like hell to hear it from your parents.

You wished to die to escape from this eternal hell.

You uttered as you gathered all the strength to push him away and ran away.

You wanted to see Tricia one more time.

You saw her across the street and she was smiling.

-

Tricia saw Y/N and the girl was smiling too with tears in her eyes and you were about to walk to her nang siya na ang tumakbo and you saw someone behind her, a guy with a machete, who was too angry even in the dark.

It was all too fast. She got ran over by a truck.

"Shit! Shit! No! No!" Tricia ran towards sa kung saan ka nahagip.

Tricia said while holding your body as you smiled at her.

You smiled for the last time. Tricia wished and hoped it wasn't the last. "Don't c-close your eyes please, stay! Please! Don't leave me! I l-love you!" Tricia pleaded and she saw your trashed clothing and it was full of bruises.

"I love you." You smiled and closed your eyes. Tricia checked your pulse, crying, wala na.

Sigaw ni Tricia.

Tricia hugged your cold body. She screamed in agony.

She was too late. She pleaded.

"Ma'am, kukunin po namin ang pasyente." The rescuer said.

-

Tricia saw how they tried and tried to revive you but they can't push the heavens to bring you down again.

The doctor announced.

Nanlumo si Tricia.

Sigaw ng isang lalaki. It was your father and Tricia pointed at him. "He brought a machete to hunt her. I'm guessing its her parents." Tricia said.

Galit na galit na dumating si Simoun at sinuntok ang dad mo.

He screamed.

While Tricia was left alone sitting at the chair with your cold and lifeless body. "I-I was supposed to confess to you, I never knew na totohanin m-mo pag-iwan mo sa akin." She smiled bitterly as she held your cold hand, the hand that used to help Tricia when she needs help when it comes to chores sa bahay ampunan.

She pleaded and cupped your cheeks.

You weren't responding, the doctor's read to Tricia and Simoun iyong complications mo and mga bruise, wounds, and internal injuries, allergies, anemia, breast cancer stage 2, and congestive heart failure.

Mahina ka na talaga sabi ng mga doktor and it was a miracle that despite of complications and abuse, you lived long.

But for Tricia, it wasn't enough, she has guilt. She said as she held your hand and cried

Tricia uttered to herself.

Tricia read all the letters in your bag and it made her cry but one caught her attention, it had a black envelope.

Dear my love,

You weren't supposed to read this but please know that I love you, I'm scared na I couldn't send these letter day by day na because walang kasiguraduhan ang buhay ko, if ever you've read this, it's okay, your feelings are valid and it is not your fault. I'm sorry that I'm weak but I want you to reach your dreams with or without me."

"Y-You're still thinking about me, I hurt you, I'm sorry please comeback." Tricia cried out.

I saw how you built a wall around people and knew that you tried to protect me in a not subtle way and I do think you loved me in your way and that you're a good person. I love you, thank you for captivating me. Live your life to the fullest kasi I didn't even regret in loving you.

Nagmamahal, Y/N"

Kung sino man nagreq nito kaiyaq amp chaour eto na mhie sana masaya ka s buhai m i2 pnakahaba nsulat k