《Book reviews *Requests Closed*》'The dark covenant' by teejay254
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This story is about Alicia, a state guard. When King Drom of the Independent States sends her on a secret mission, she's happy to accept it, but everything turns out different than she expected.
I can't say much more about it, because there were many elements in the story, namely lore, that I failed to comprehend. I've seen many instances of infodumping (try not to do that; scatter the info throughout the story, helps keep readers interested), and while the lore and the worldbuilding seemed original and intriguing enough, it was all very difficult to follow. For example, what exactly is a Darkbender? I know it's probably been explained, but by infodumping, especially with 'meh' GPS... it gets confusing. The story is difficult to work through because of this.
There are many characters, interesting enough, but I've found that none of them really stand out, and their behaviour isn't always realistic. Example: Drom. I know he's not all about formality, but he is still a king, with a court and subjects. He can't behave as he pleases and do away with all forms of formality; remember, being king is a job. Would you be fooling around like a child at work? My guess is, no. And if there's a reason why Drom can behave like this, give it, and do so clearly. Example two: that girl whose name I forgot who had an incredibly exaggerated crush. Oh, please. People don't act that dramatic when they're crushing. Well, some do, but even for them this was extreme.
GPS... hm. I'd recommend major editing. It's not okay and interrupts the flow of the story. And please, remove those walls of text in the few chapters that contain them. Paragraphs exist for a reason.
I'm interested in this world. It seems well-thought out. However, I do believe it requires major improvements to live up to its full potential.
Rating: 4.5
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