《Book reviews *Requests Closed*》'I am Marsha' by ||Oddie||
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'I am Marsha' is a short horror story by ||Oddie||. This review will be slightly different from others, seeing as I'll mostly be paying attention to what the author asked me to give feedback on. Of course, there will also be feedback on the story in general.
Let me first point out that the concept of this story is fascinating, and definitely something you could do more with. From what I've read, it's really cool! There's just one thing wrong: it's… confusing, as you feared. A lot is happening in a very short span of time, and it all happens… too fast. My advice would be to make the story longer, to shed more light on what is actually happy and allow your readers to relax into the story. Start it off slowly, and then you can proceed to the rollercoaster of events you've got right now.
But those events… they're cool. I wasn't scared, but you've definitely got that creepy horror atmosphere down.
The characters are also pretty interesting, from what little we're given about them. In case you do want to write more of this story, maybe you can tell us more about them (personalities, looks)? This is also something that'll help us understand your story better. I did think the dialogue flowed nicely, even though there is little.
Lastly, the GPS. Awesome. I don't recall seeing a single mistake. I love your writing style and the story really has potential! Just tweak it a little here and there, and you've got something really cool!
Rating: 7!
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