《Book reviews *Requests Closed*》'The Grieving Smile' by defineindependence
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Does anyone remember this review? I suppose not, 'cause it was only online for a day or two. The story, Her Smiling Tears, has been updated/edited and the author kindly asked me to write a new review. The story is now called 'The Grieving Smile' and below is the review I wrote earlier, but then with some changes.
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All righty, let's get this show on the road!
This book, written by wattpad user defineindependence, is about Maria and Sarah, two 'besties' who get abducted after a mean college prank.
As for the plot, I can't explain a lot about it. After the abduction, there's MONKEY'S and HEARTBREAK and SUDDEN SUPERVILLAIN FAMILY and PYRAMIDS
I'm sorry, am I supposed to know what's going on?
Well, at least you get points for originality.
The plot is, even after editing, kind of all over the place. The ending you write for the book is nice, though.
Second thing: characters. Ask me right now to name a character I liked, and I won't be able to name one. The only characters who really appear frequently are Maria and Sarah, and I get I'm supposed to be annoyed by Maria at first, but... no. They remind me a lot of some people I hate, they remind me of the type of people who normally hate me... just not my kind of people, no sympathy for them whatsoever.
My opinion on the characters hasn't changed whatsoever. Still not my kind of people, for the reasons listed above.
The GPS is mostly fine, nothing I can't let slip for now. I wouldn't worry about it too much.
I don't have anything else to say; I'd only recommend developing the rest of the characters more, so you've got more likable characters, just in case.
Rating: 6,5
You get half a point extra for that nice ending, but as for the rest... reading the updated version didn't feel that different from the previous one.
I don't think the rating I'll give for this story will get higher than this. However, if you really do want to get a good review, I suggest finding someone else to review the book. If author-chan really wants me to, I'll delete this review and we'll forget this whole thing existed.
Deal?
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