CHAPTER SONG - How can I forget, MKTO

"WAKE UP! It's five fifty!"

I groaned, squeezing my eyes shut even harder. I wonder if that kid has an off switch. Sixteen years later and I'm still searching. Beside me, Lina shifted closer to me, a small sound coming out of her. Something like a moan, and a sigh but the sound went straight to my dick. She scooted closer, head nuzzled in my neck.

Well shit, my morning just got better. And honestly, I really thought that's that best it could get and how foolish was I. Because the second I wrapped my arm around her, and brought her deeper into my chest, I was proven wrong. This, right here, is the best. And as her soft breathes brushed against my chest, I felt myself just sinking into this bed and wanting to never leave.

She melted in my hold. "Why is he yelling?" she whispered, her voice a little deeper from the lack of use over the night, and sexy as hell. I felt the sound hit my vein, whoosh through them, and drop into my dick like it was its morning fucken coffee.

I sighed, pressing my nose to the top of her head and inhaling her soft fruitful smell. "It's race day." I answered.

"Race day?" she repeated back, each breath smacking my chest and leaving me wanting more.

"Formula One."

"Why this early in the morning?"

I closed my eyes, savoring the second and replied, "It's early to us, but where they race, it's mid-day." I explained, sighing because I knew Ash was coming back. And will keep coming back. It's a tradition for us to watch the race. We haven't missed a single one in... I don't remember. It's been forever, and for the majority of the year every two weeks or so, you'll find us on the couch at six am, on those Sunday.

Sure, it's Ash's thing because after all he was going into the sport one day, but he roped all of us into in some way. Kirsan show's up for support, although from what I knew he should have left this morning to the airport. His flight to Japan leaves at six am, and his on his way to climb Mount Fuji. I'm sure he will keep up with the stats of today's race, if not watch it on the plane.

Maddox show's up for support, but over the years has formed an interest in it. And I show up because I genially fell in love with the sport. It began because I wanted to learn it for Ash. To understand what his talking about, and to be able to hold a conversation about it with him. Then, overtime, I got sucked in. Now, I support a whole team, and I have become highly invested. To the point that I have invest money into my team. So has Ash.

Lily, she knows as much as both of us, but only because it's what Ash loves, and Aster knows the basics but isn't to interested. My dad got into a few years ago, when he realized Ash was serious, and his team preference is the same as mine. Ash, and Maddox support our rivals. Which tends to lead to arguments, and chaotic Sunday mornings. Nothing new in our household.

I sighed, knowing I need to get up. "Love." I whispered, grabbing Lina's attention because I can feel her gradually falling back to sleep in my hold. Honestly, I even found myself wanted to drift back into my own sleep. And it hit me then, that now that I know what it feels like to have her fall asleep in my arms, my night are going to be extra cold without her. I wonder if there's a way I can get her to sleep in my bed every night...

She lifted her head up, soft umber eyes blinked at me coated in haziness that filled my head. I leaned forward, pressing my lips to her forehead and felt her exhale softly in my embrace. A feeling that I didn't realize would stir my souls but did. "I need to get up." I explained, "You can stay, sleep some more."

Her lips parted a little before she started shaking her head, "No, no. I want to come. I want to see."

I raised my brow at her. "You sure? You don't have too. I know it's early."

Her plump lips curled up, and I realized that her smile is my high. Screw drugs, or alcohol, or any form of medication, this was powerful enough to be classified as a drug. Nodding with confidence, she replied, "Yes. I want to watch with you. I know the sport is important to you, and I want to learn."

My chest tightened to the point of that it felt like it might explode and leave my heart thumping in her hands. The love this girl gives me, the attention, compassion, and unblinding sweetness was going to eventually kill me. How long can a person feel high before it kills them? Because that's what it's like, a constant high.

Before I could answer, the door swung open and Ash popped in. "Fuck are you doing, dude? We are a minute away from starting and your still in bed?" he gapped at me, a bowl of popcorn already made and being eaten. It's not even six am... and where do I get popcorn too? With some Carmel preferably.

If the blanket wasn't pulled up to Lina's shoulders, I would have scowled at him. "Ash, I know we thought you how to knock. I know for a moment there you weren't ken on the idea, but didn't we get past that stage?" I asked, calmly. I know his just excited, and I can't really blame him.

His soft brown eyes bounced around us, widening in realization before he started to slowly back out of the room. "My bad." he said, spinning around and racing down the hall, "But get up! It's starting!" he yelled, leaving my door wide fucken open.

Lina chuckled in my hold, pulling back a little and it took everything in me to actually let her go. She rolled over onto her back. "I love that little dude."

I rolled my eyes, lifting the blanket off, and sitting up on the edge of the bed. "Hopefully not more than me." I said, looking over my shoulder and finding her already grinning on me. I watched her lift onto her knees and swing her arms around my shoulders. I exhaled, leaning backwards into her embrace and she smiled at me. "Not in any universe."

I chuckled, lifting off the bed and grabbing a pair of shirt as she sat on my bed, watching me. Something about her soft gaze made me want to walk back to the bed and cuddle her in my arms. How the fuck am I ever supposed to let her go when just the thought makes me sick. How the hell am I going to do it when she's in New York? That fact alone made me need to steel myself otherwise, I knew I would run back to her. Not walk, run.

I opened my closet, finding a shirt for her to wear and walked it over to her. "Switch you for a kiss?"

She grinned. "The best kind of deal." she said, lifting up to her knees and giving me a soft peek on the lips. I shot forward, pulling her back into myself. "Not enough." I whispered, stealing a longer, and more passionate kiss.

In the few minutes it took us to get ready, and come downstairs, Ash was already scowling at the TV. I strolled to the couch with Lina following behind me and trying to see the TV from behind my side where she was currently holding on too. I know she's not to comfortable with the new surroundings.

Maddox shoved me out of the way as I walked past him. "Your late. Sit the fuck down and quit blocked the race." he clipped, tone dripping in annoyance, but I ignored him. I scanned the stats, undestanding both of their sudden annoyance and my own sudden happiness. I dropped down on the couch, zoning in on my team, who were driving at the top of their game today. All of the cars were zooming past each other, fighting for position, and overtaking as if their lives depended on it.

Beside me, Lina crossed her legs underneath herself and leaned forward to watch the tv. "You all are really serious about this." she muttered, glancing around the room.

"Because this is life or death." Ash clipped. And I leaned back, relaxing at the current position my team was holding. I liked the thrill of it, the unpredictability of it. Anything could happen, and you never know who's going to win because even the guy in last place could end up on the podium holding a trophy. It's how the sport went, and it was all about the fight.

The chatter box of Ash's team came on, and they started talking about a throttle issue that made Ash curse under his breath. He sat on the ground, legs pulled up to himself and watched with a serious expression on his face because today his team wasn't doing so hot, and mine has overtake the lead. A fact that made me very fucken happy because they really were stellar, no matter how much trash people talk about the team. The game is to win, and they aren't there to think about others. They are thinking about the championship, and checkered flag. I respected that.

I glanced towards Maddox, taking in his grim expression. He sat at the edge of the couch, arms draped over his knees and a look that said he wished he could jump through the screen and drive the car himself. I moved my attention towards Lina who sat beside me, looking as confused as ever but trying with all her ability to put two and two together by the little knowledge she has. It was terribly cute, to the point that I couldn't help my grin.

Reaching over, I grabbed her arms and pulled her onto my self. "Ask your questions." I told her, knowing she had a million and one.

Her toasted eyes bounced towards me with hesitation. "Are you sure? I don't want to distract you. You all are taking this really seriously."

Maddox sighed, running his palm down his face in frustration as his team lost another spot, and Ash dropped his head into his knees. "I can't watch this. It's a horror show." he winced, only to lift his head a second later and zone in on the TV again.

I chuckled, replying to Lina. "I'm sure." I could read the screen and focus on her with no problem. And if it came down to it, I would choose her either way.

She spun around in my lap, making herself more comfortable, and I had to hold back a hard groan because I realized in that second how much of a mistake it was to put her onto my lap. Turns out, it's not all the easy to sit here with a clear head, and clean thoughts when she's on my lap, and my dick knew that all too well and he was eager to get working. I had to adjust myself a little, and she smiled knowing exactly what she was doing to me.

I narrowed a playful gaze at her, and she leaned into my chest, shooting a look towards Ash who groaned dramatically as my second car overtook his. "Okay." she started, "How do you know who's, who? They all look the same to me. You can't exactly see the numbers on the cars, or the helmets. And I can't exactly pinpoint everyone."

I jerked my head at the screen. "You see the little box at the top of the screen? Each team has two drivers, and you see the names right there? That's all the drivers. You know your team, you know your drivers, and you can tell how they are doing." I explained in the most basic way I could think off. I wanted her to understand, but I know it's not all the simple. Lina's smart though, she will catch on at lightning speed no doubt.

She nodded, biting her lip as she looked at the screen. "So you know the names of all twenty drivers?" she asked, and I swear I heard a little shock behind her question. I shrugged at it. "Basically."

Brushing my hand on her side, I leaned in. "How badly do you want to research right now?" I asked, not being able to stop myself. Heaven help me because I know the answer will fuck me.

Her body relaxed into me, and she whispered, "So badly. I'm so lost."

For a few minutes we watched, and in that time one of my rivals managed to overtake my P2 spot. I wrinkled my nose at it, slightly annoyed because it was a shit move but sat back and watching with steady force. I mean come on, I had money in the team, I'm invested. And it took Lina all of four more seconds before another questions fell off her pretty lips, "Okay, but I don't know what the drivers look like. Do you have pictures or something? So, I can match faces to their names."

I grinned, pulling out my phone because I know how badly she wants the information and in all honestly, I liked helping her. In some idiotic way it made me feel part of her processes, let me peek into her mind, and feel her curiosity. It felt like a little bit of goodness rubbing off on me, and making my skin feel just a spec cleaner. I know nothing could ever wipe my sins, but at least her goodness could make it temporarily feel cleaner. I'll take what I could get, because it was more then I had to begin with.

I googled the team, and their drivers, starting with my own of course. Giving her my phone, I explained who was who, and gave her a few more facts and details about the team. And she nodded along like she was making notes and highlighting important information. Fuck me, was it hot and I only got harder under her. It didn't help that she was twirling back and forth between me and that fucken TV.

"Hey sweetheart, you boyfriend is being bias. There are more teams then just that one, make sure he is giving you all the information."

Ash tipped his head in our direction. "Show her our team drivers too. Don't just show her the ugly ones, we have the best-looking ones."

I shook my head at his comment but didn't mind it too much because Lina was smiling on my lap like she was having the time of her life, and I couldn't ignore it even if I tried. Instead, I pulled up photos of their team too and showed them too her. She took her time, scrolling through the information. "Ash is right, they are way prettier." she muttered, then wide eyed looked up at me with realization that she said that out loud.

Ash busted out laughed. "Exactly. We got all the pretty boys, Lin." he called out.

She looked at me with such big eyes that the tint's of brown were overflowing into my mind. "Are you telling me your switching teams?" I asked, my lips curling up into a grin as I stoked her side, and felt her softened in my embrace from a second ago.

"Technically, I haven't chosen a team."

I grinned. "Shame on me for thinking you would choose whatever team I root for."

"Shame on you, yes."

I laughed, just as the doorbell rung and Ash sprung off the ground. "I got it." he said, making his way for the door. Today was actually cupcake day, and Maddox ordered a box for delivery. I for one can't wait to dig into them. I could already feel my mouth watering, and stomach starting to twist with hunger. I would thank Maddox for it, but I doubt he would even hear me at this moment. The scowl on his face told me he was wishing for a different result for this race, and it's not looking good for them.

I glanced at the screen, scanning my drivers on the charts. "Choose a team, love. But please, don't pick a team just for the pretty boys. I don't know if I could take that kind of hit to my heart."

She chuckled. "As if you don't have enough ego to handle that." she said, turning her full attention to the tv, and leaving me starved. How pathetic I was, for actually feeling like someone ripped my stomach out of my body when she took her brown glazed eyes away from me. How selfish of me to want to pull her attention back to myself. As if I can't last a few second without it, and yet in my mind I knew I was fucked.

I barely watched the screen, instead watched her. Cheeks pulled up and rounding in the pretties way as she focused on the tv with laser eyes. Taking noting, comparing them, and weighting out the pros and cons in her mind. She understood so little, and yet the lack of information didn't stop her from looking like she was making the most important decision of her like. I guess that's just Lina though, everything is important too her. And I get to be one of those things.

Ash marched back into the room. "Anything?" he called out to Maddox who only groaned in response, and without a word answered. They were losing, and at their home race. Which is even worse if you ask me.

I narrowed my gaze at the tv as one of my drivers took a sharp overtake, pushing his way through the inside and from the corner of my eye saw Ash set down the box of cupcakes. I relaxed back in my seat when my driver pulled forward, gaining the positions and looked to were my brother grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders. He stood in the center of the living room, cupcake in his hand, and a deep scowl.

Shame. No one should look that upset with a cupcake in their hand. Cupcake's fix everything.

This was around the time were everyone who was losing was going to get up and start standing around the TV as if that would change something. I'll admit, I have been in that position to many times. Today, it seems I can relax because pace wise my team is ahead by six seconds and are on track for the podium. They were fighting in the front lines, and I knew already those cupcakes were going to be the icing on the cake after this win.

Before I could process what was happening, Lina jumped off my lap faster than I could react and left me shocked. I stared at my empty arms for a split second before looking up at her with confusion. "I think I chose a team." she announced, fixing my white tee-shirt that make it very hard to keep my thoughts clean.

"Which one?" Something told me it wasn't mine.

She pointed towards the screen. "Your team fights dirty. Did you see that mean man try to push his way around that car. And with no room! He could have hurt him. No. I won't be his supporter. I choose Ash's team."

Ash whirled around, his blanket doing a whole whooshing noise and grinned at Lina like someone just told him he won a lottery. "Welcome, Lina, to the team of winners."

"You are losing." I deadpan.

Lina scowled at me, as if I was controlling the team some how and yet I couldn't stop my smile. Lina was always so reserved, and calm on most days. Seeing her come out of her shell, it was a treat that I'm welling to have diabetes for. "Because you're cheating. Your team is full of cheaters." she said, pointing at me with a stern look that made my blood boil. I glanced towards the pillow beside me and tugged it onto my lap. Maddox smirked, noticing the movement.

Oh how well she's going to fit into our Sunday mornings. "I call it winning." I told her, leaning forward and grabbing a cupcake before starting to peel it.

"Winning?" Maddox looked at me like I had lost my mind, "Lina, who knows almost nothing about the sport has a fucken point. You team is full of aggressive drivers that don't have a sense of understand when they need to back down. Those overtake they keep doing are dangerous and could cause accidents. If Lina, the newbie could figure that out, what does that say about your winning team?"

I carelessly shrugged. "That we are leading, and looking forward to winning the championship this year?"

Ash shook his head. "With terrible sportsman-ship."

"A win, is a win." I grinned, purposely getting on their nerves, "Let's not talk about terrible sportsmanship because your team fucked it last race. That crash was no one fault but their own. They tried the aggressive route and failed. If you want to win, you win, regardless of others. Just because your team can't cut it, and race with the winners, doesn't mean you all have to cry to me. It's the sport, move on." I finished, taking a bite of this tasty cupcake that felt like a win itself.