CHAPTER SONG - Heat Waves, Glass Animal

Climbing up the boat with Lina beside me, felt like a new adventure. It's not like I haven't been on this boat a million times before, but with her everything felt new. Essentially when she was practically bouncing with excitement next to me. Her little hand gripping onto me like I was taking her into heaven or something. Holy fuck why did everything she do make me want to take her in my arm's and just hide her. As if her innocence needs to be shielded from the world. From the real world, because here, nothing is as pure as she is. That's all I wanted. To protect her pure goodness. To make sure she never felt it fade. I wanted to protect that soft innocence that has all but been blown out of me. At least she had it, and I never wanted her to know what it feels like to live without it.

Beside me, she almost tripped coming up the ramp and I shot my hand out, steading her."Careful, love. We need you safe and unbruised if you want to keep exploring all those little thing's you have in your wild mind."

She blushed, hanging onto my hand. Eye's so wide with autumn in hue, she said, "Have you ever left bruises on girls?"

I haven't. I'm ruthless, but I have enough decency in me to not go that far. I shook my head before responded, "I can think of better marks to leave on your body." I smirked at her. A hickey, or four might prove to be better.

Somewhere on the boat, the speaker's started up and My first kiss, by 3OHI3 started blasting. I rolled my eyes, knowing that it was Ash's doing. You could tell by the beat of the music because it always sounded like it was an invite to dance. On the deck, I could see Maddox with his laptop in his lap. His been stressing terribly lately, not that I'm not feeling my own level of stress. We were still trying to figure out what our father's were up too, and ever time we felt like we found something it turned out to be wrong. The only clue we have to go on right now is that they have a meeting set up with the Saint Antionio Boy's. Which makes no fucken sense. They are our biggest competition, what the fuck could we possibly want with them?

Their hiding skill's are extraordinary, and it worried me even more because if they were hiding it this well then how bad could it be? Maddox didn't like that his own skills were failing him and that's why his been super glued to his computer the past few days. And now, the further I got onto the boat, with Lina's excitement next to me, the more I knew he needed a break. At this point, energy drink's might as well replace his own blood because that's what he was living on. And it's not like I'm not there, because I am. I have questioned more soldier's then I can count, and with the lack of answers and rise of anger, accident happened. I have scavenged my father's office, computer, and car's for clues. I have softly interrogated uncle and my dad, because I can't let them know we are searching for question's behind their backs. I have even follow's them around a few times. Fucken hell, I feel like some sort of creep but beyond that, I feel a ping of hurt for being blind to what is going on.

Right now though, Maddox needed a break. For his own sanity at this point, and a little for mine. If I have to wake up to my one more night to his computer screen being the only light in my room, I might kick him out of my bed. So climbing up the side of the deck, I called out to him, "Madds!"

His head shot up at me, pale tired eyes, and untamed blondish hair the looked lighter under the sun. I jerked my head at him. "Get off." I commanded, which made him narrowed his gaze at me, but I steeled my expression. He knows his been over working himself, and he knows he needs a break. We both do. And that why Kirsan was walking up to him, holding a red solo cup, and in the other hand two water bottles. "You have stress wrinkles, and they are't doing you any favors." he smirked, extending the cup to him.

From the top deck, Alvin patted over, some toy sticking out of him mouth. Lina let go off my hand, dropping to her knees with the biggest smile spread on her face. Alvin bounced over to her, rubbing his head all over her palms as she cooed at him in a soft voice. I watched them for a second as Maddox sighed from the couch, tugging at his gold chain, "Which you are the reason for." he replied to Kirsan.

"I beg to defer. You are your own cause of stress." Kirsan argued back, tossing a water bottle to me. I caught it, glancing back down at Lina who perked up, deep brown eyes meeting with Maddox. "You look a little tired Madds. Kirsan's right, stress wrinkles don't suit you."

Maddox finally shut is laptop, pushing it aside and snatched the cup from Kirsan. " I feel bullied. You two can't gang up on me like that, I already have stress wrinkles. And I need a stiff drink now." he explained, sarcasm dripping in his tone because he was clearly already holding that drink, and on his way to being very fucken drunk.

Kirsan's face lifted into a grin. "Undoubtedly. It's why I walked over here with it already made for you. I can insure that it's extra fucken strong. I put extra love in it and shit."

Maddox lifted the cup to his lips, "You and love don't mix, but either way you're a gem." he smirked to Kirsan, before gulping it down.

The boat started moving, and because all of us were here, it meant that Bonnie and Clyde were behind the wheel. I would be worried, but neither of them were drunk yet, so they were fine. Both knew how to steer a boat, and if anything, I'm sure Aster will call one of us. Eventually, when they get drunk it will be up to the sober once's to navigate the boat. Or Joel, because I'm sure his around here somewhere.

The sober once's usually consisted of Kirsan and I. Sometimes Aster, but not if Lily gets involved. Today though, I realized we have another sober one among us. Lina, I noticed doesn't drink either and I don't know why I like the fact so much. Maybe because I knew I wouldn't be drinking, and having her support that in her own sobriety was like a supportive kick. Not that I ever gravitated towards drinking. I have tried it, but again the risk wasn't worth it. I have seen the lasting effect of sobriety, how terribly cruel it can be too you. I rather not add that too my list of problem's.

I sat down beside Maddox, watching Lina turn her body towards me, even as she played with Alvin. I wonder if she know's that she does that, find's a way to always keep me in her previsional view. I don't mind it, not at all, in fact I find it extremely satisfying. To know, that I'm the one she's always looking at, hell that's hot as fuck. Not that I'm any different. I have had to force myself to look away from her to many times. Something about her beautiful deep eyes, and enlighten grin always keep's me stuck on her.

After a few more second, Lina finally stood, walking over to me. I tugged her onto me lap, side eyeing Maddox down the rest of his drink. Kirsan watched him too, expressionless but clinically. As if he was trying to figure out what it meant that Maddox was sailing himself into the drunk world. I can figure it out easily. It's easier to be out of your mind, then it. And Maddox, his looking for any way to distract himself from the torture room his built.

Lina wiggled around a little, making my dick stir and I had to swallow thickly to not get a hard on in this moment. She has no idea how much she effect's me, and it's almost to fucken painful to admit that I'm basically hopeless against her. The first time, fuck, I'll admit I had to take a breath or two to make sure I don't lose my shit. Honestly, I had to force myself to slow down, to be gentle because like she said, she's only every felt vanilla and I swore in that second to myself that I would never let her be that fucken bored again.

From now on, she's going to know all the pleasures of sex. And I could see how much she wants to explore, wants to open up but something is slowing her. Making her sink back a little, and over think it. Whatever it is, I'll be patient. I think she just needs to trust me on a intimacy level, and with her past I'm sure that's not easy, that why I'm taking it slow with her. Step by step, until she finally ready. I still think about the first time, to often if I had to admit it. I dreamt of it at some point, so like I said, I'm hopeless. I gave up trying to control the little devil in my stomach that releases the fucken butterflies when she's around. I gave up, because I'm always to lost in just watching her. Her pure innocence steal's my attention, and keeps it.

Maddox turned to us. "Lina, what are you doing after high school?"

Confidence, and enthusiasm filled her tone. "The goal is to get into my dream school in New York. Hopefully, I can get the scholarship. Finger's crossed." she said, crossing her fingers and even though I felt like an asshole for hating that she was leaving, I was happy for her. She was passionate about it and her passion was innocent, I still wanted to protect that with everything in me.

Maddox lifted his hand, crossing his fingers. "Double cross."

Kirsan played with the cap of the water bottle. "I'll be in New York too." he announced and Lina nodded. "I heard. I heard Oliva will be there too."

Maddox almost chocked on the sip of liquor that he was just taking. Coughing, he leaned forward heaving air into his lungs because no one actively brought up the topic of Olivia. Not that it was off limit's but we just all got to the point that we realized it's almost pointless to bring it up. Apparently Lina didn't get the memo. I'm sure Kirsan will give her the clue in a second. Only, I was surprised when he didn't just end the topic with a sharp word, and instead slanted a look in Maddox's direction like he was having a ridiculous reaction. Tugging at his flannel, he opened the capped water bottle and acutally answered her, "She will be."

Lina smiled, looking innocent, but I can see the little misfit behind it because she was fishing for information. I wonder if she knew that Kirsan can see right through it. It made me chuckled, and wonder how far Kirsan will allow this conversation to go. With her arm wrapped around my shoulder's, she had her cheek pressed to my forehead and I was barely holding myself together. It came and went in waves, this new feeling of just soft love. I was still getting use to it. Getting use to loving someone who isn't family, someone who has the ability to fully destroy me. I was still getting use to being loved back by this girl. It's not the same as family, this love was passionate, and kind. It was everything I saw in my parents, and I still couldn't believe that I was getting to experience that.

To Kirsan, she replied, "Is that the girl you told me about?"

His gaze flickered up to her, hardening around the rim's but I knew better then to worry. After all, it was Kirsan who gave her the information, so the move was calculated by him. He knew there was a chance she would figure it out, and the risk was considered. Slowly, he nodded. "She is."

Lina grinned, bouncing around in my lap a little with excitement. Fuck me. Actually, someone shot me because how the hell was I suppose to control myself when she was basically bouncing on my dick? Resting my hand on her hip, I held her down, for my own sanity at this point. She gave me confused look, but started talking, "That's great. She's really nice, we actually talk sometimes. Not that we are friend's or anything but she's really kind and has helped me out in class a few times. She actually asked me if I wanted to meet up with her in New York, for a café date. She's super duper sweet, I see why you like her."

Kirsan cringed at the word like, but it was barely noticeable. Caping the water again, he asked, "Will you? Meet with her?"

Lina nodded in my hold. "I plan too." she answered, and Kirsan gave a single nod, packing that piece of information for a future time when he needed to use it for his advantage because that's how his mind worked. Everything went into a box for him to later pull out and use for his benefit.

Maddox took the second of silence to speak up again, "And you two plan to date even with her in New York?"

I slanted him a hard look. He knew damn fucken well I wasn't going to let New York stop me from holding onto this girl. In return he rolled his eyes, finishing off his drink as Lina looked to me with hesitation in her gaze. She thought I would give her up when the time came, and if I'm being honestly I'm terrified it might be the opposite. Because there was absolutely no chance I was ever going to let go of her. She might let go of me, but I will follow her to neverland if I have too.

Turning my head, I kissed her plump lips. "You got me, love." I confirmed, because I knew that's what terrified her. It was one of her insecurities, and fuck every person who every made her feel like she was a second choose, or not worth sticking around for. She's afraid that I might end this, and if that isn't the silliest fear, then I don't know what is. I'm pretty sure that I'm fucked here. Totally, and uncontrollable fucked because I can't even imagine not having this girl smile at me like I'm a sparkly star from the midnight sky. And I was right because my answer made her smile, a full memorizing smile that filled my head to the rim with a dopamine high.

Eventually, we were in the middle of the lake, and I could see Ash walking out of the cockpit to the front of the boat. I leaned over a little, trying to see him better, but Kirsan spoke up, "I see him."

I relaxing again. Music blasted in the speakers, one of Ash's playlist for sure because I recognized the song as 'Body On my Mind by Moonshine'. The guy has overplayed this song a million times, and when you share a bedroom wall with him, you tend to listen a lot of music because he doesn't know what the meaning of turn the volume down. Secretly, I don't mind it. As long as it keeps him happy, I don't care.

It wasn't until Sara came out of the cockpit, did I notice this whole time she was missing. She walked across the deck, halting in front of us with loose curl past her shoulders, and a grin. "Please don't tell me you all plan to sit here like this? Because you all might be sickeningly rich and are use to this high life, but I am not. So, come on." she grabbed Maddox's arm and pulling him up before shooting a look in Kirsan's direction. "Dance with me." she finished.

Kirsan regarded her for a second, a calculated expression on his face before his gaze bounced toward's Maddox who was already up, and standing by Sara. A empty solo cup hung by his leg were he held it, and I watched him wink at Kirsan in agreement. Instantly, I snapped forward understanding what's going on. Pointing my finger at my brother, I glared sternly. "Aye, you do anything to upset my girlfriend, and I'll personally find a way to make you miserable."

It was a weak threat, they both knew it, but I also knew that look to fucken well. I knew the kind of idea's that stirred behind that look they both just shared. I never participated in their little fun, but I know all about it. I'm fully aware of what Kirsan, and Maddox are into, together. And I was still staring between them when Kirsan got up, a smirk sliding into place that made him look so casually relaxed. "What do you even mean, brother? The girl asked to dance, we are only fulfilling her wishes."

Maddox nodding in agreement, grabbed Sara's hand and wrapping his arm over her shoulder before glanced over his shoulder. "We'll behave." he joked, but the look he gave Kirsan said over-wise. I would argue, but somehow I knew that was pointless. Plus they were already making their way to the front of the boat were the open area was. Also, I'm hoping they can sort their shit out without me getting involved.

Lina watched them. "Should I worry they will be mean too her?"

I sighed, watching them walk up the stairs. "Mean? No. Should you be worried she might be getting over her head? Probably."

She pressed her lip's together for a second before turning back to me. "Sara will be fine. She's a big girl and I trust your brother."

She was to trustful, way to trustful but I wasn't going to burst her bubble because honestly, I liked the bubble myself. Instead, I smiled at her and said, "You ever ridden a jet ski?"

She shook her head, her hair bouncing around, and eye's full of overflowing excitement. Grabbing her waist, I tugged her up. "Then come on, love. Time for you to get use to living our high life."

I lowered the jet ski, and helped her put on a life jacket, trying my best to not stare senselessly at her fucken killer body in the white bikini. She had curves for days, and boobs to fill her top with no effort. An ass to hold onto, and tanned soft skin I wanted to take my time kissing.

For her sanity, I put on a life jacket too. Usually, I don't because like I said I don't usually protect my life at all costs, but the moment I watched her eyes water over at the thought of me being hurt, I found myself never wanting to put her in a position where she would ever cry for me. The second her lip trembled because I wasn't wearing a helmet, well, in that second I found myself welling to do anything to never see the pained expression again. So fuck if I have to wear a helmet, or a life jacket as long as she's smiling, those little thing's don't bother me.

Getting her on the jet ski, I explain all the controls to her. I explained how to turn it on, and off. I explained all the safety and she listened with an expression full of concentration. As if I was teaching her some lesson and about to quiz her. As if she failed, the world will stop. It was so extremely cute, and I smile through the whole thing. When she started asking question, and nodding at the answers as if she was making a list somewhere I almost bursted out laughing. Hell, the girl got my blood pumping and I couldn't stop my racing heart even if I tried.

After a few run's with me in the front, I finally sat her in the front. She looked at me over her shoulder, hand's gripping onto the handle. "Are you sure? What if I do something wrong, and you get hurt?"

I raised my brow, because why am I her first concern? She should be her own first. Shaking my head, I grinned. "I promise to be right here the whole time. If I fly off, I swear to take you with me." I winked at her jokingly, because no way am I taking her with me.

She nodded, chewing on her lip with hesitation. Somehow, I actually even knew what she was thinking. What if she's not good at it? What if she fails? What if I change my mind, and don't want her to ride? All her worries were silly because I wanted her to go through this adventure, try it and see if she likes it. She took to dirt biking easily, and something tell's me she will like this too. I liked being the one to sit by her side as she trailed though life, figuring out what she liked and didn't. It felt like an adventure itself to be the one to introduce her to those new things. Now, she just needed the confidence boost. So gripping her chin in my finger's, I smiled. "How about you ride, and then ask me how you did?"