Zindagi kitni ajeeb hoti hai na. Just UNPREDICTABLE. You get what you didn't even prayed for, and that unwanted thing is what you hate the most.

But if you have some kind of weakness, then trust me this all will be always connected to that weakness. And in my case, my weakness is LOVE, the love of my parents.

In my whole life of 27 years, I have learned to stay strong, to be independent, to spread love whatever come may and most importantly to make my beloved ones my priorities over my own heart.

Bohat mushkil hota hai ye amal. Khud ko mar kar, khud ki har khawahish ko ek side par rakh kar dusre ko khush rakhna. Bohat mushkil hota hai apne jazbaat ko chupa kar dosro ki khushi mai khush aur dosro k gham mai un k sath barabar ka shareeq hona. Khud ko khatam kar k, khud ka wajood kisi rait k zarray ki tarha mitti mai mila kar jeena, asan nahi hota.

When it comes to the people i love, mai bht kamzor hun, zindagi ma bas ek hi maqsad hai, jin se piyar krti hun un ki khawahisho pr pura utar sako.

Aur ab bhi mai wahi karu gi jo ek beti hone ka farz hai, maa baap ka huqum manana. Bhalay hi is mai meri khushi nahi, par is se mere baba khush han, meri mama khush han, mera bhai khush hai.

Aur sab se bharh kar mere Allah ne agr mujhe yaha tak la k khara kia hai toh usi ne agy bhi kuch acha hi socha ho ga.

Bas aye mere Allah! Mujhe har azmaish aur mushkil mai pura utarne ki tofeeq atta farma (ameen)

I came into my room after that talk with baba by making an excuse that I want some time to think. But the time I have came in my room I have been continuously thinking of his tears and his words

"Beta! Jab tum paida hui thi na, tab mai sb se ziyada khush hua tha. Dunya waly sab beta mangty han, mane tujhe manga tha us Khuda se kiu k betiyan ghar ki rehmat aur baap k dil ka chayn hoti han. Aur mere Allah ne ye naimat mujhe atta farmai aur usi k sath ek bhari zimadari bhi mere kandho par dali. Tumhari parwarish ki, tumhari zindagi ki. Meri jaan, mai tumhay zabardasti ya jaldbazi ka faisla karne ko nahi keh raha, bas meri jaan mai dar gaya hun is zindagi se. Kia pata kal kia hona hai. Zinda rahu ga bhi ya nahi, bas apne rehty rehty mai tumhy tmhare ghar ka hoty dekhna chahta hun. Bete zindagi bohat lambi hai tumhari abhi, isi kisi saathi k sath guzarne se zindagi asan ho jati hai.

Baqi meri jaan jo tumhara faisla ho ga mujhe manzoor ho ga. "

A tear fell from my eye, then another and another. I was continuously crying. I stood up from my bed and stopped infront of mirror that was on right side of the room. I didn't wiped my tears. I let them fall. I just saw myself in the mirror.

Baba mujh se itna piyar karty han aur woh jo faisla kare gay woh mere liye behtar hi ho ga.

I put my hair behind my ear and saw the bitter reality of mine. This mark and my age has become a question for myself that am I even suitable for anyone? Am I even capable of being someone's life partner? Mujhe Sheharyar pasand nahi hai woh baat toh baad ki hai, pehly sawal ye hai k kia mai us k qabil hun?

Baba aur mama ki khushi k liye is rishty k liye Han toh keh du gi, par sari zindagi aise insan k sath guzarna jis ko mai thek se janti tak nahi, jis se jab bhi mili hun larai k elawa kich nahi kia, aur jo ego ko apni naak par le kar ghomta hai.

Par usi ne mere liye rishta bhi toh bheja hai.

I just closed my eyes because I was so tired of all this if's and but' s. I just want some sleep.

°°°°°°°°°°

"Beta sahi se nashta karo. Tab se plate se bas kheli ja rahi ho. "Mama said this. I looked up and said

" jee mama kha rahi hun"

We were on breakfast table. Baba was in his room. Zuhaib went office and mama and I were alone.

"Mama baba ne nashta kar lia?" I asked.

"Nahi beta! Keh rahy thay thori der baad kare gay nashta. "

"Par mama un ki medicines deni hoti han time par ap kia karti han?" I left my food there and went straight to kitchen and started to make breakfast for baba. I took tray and put two pieces of bread, a half boiled egg and a cup of milk on it and went to baba's room.

"Ap ne kiu nashta time se nahi karna tha? Kaha gaya hai ap ka dil jo dil nahi kar raha khana khane ka?" I said in a clear voice as I entered the room. I placed the tray on side table and sat near his feet on bed. Baba was reading the newspaper, as soon as he saw me he held his arms open for me to hug him

"Aa gai meri betiya raani"

I didn't hugged him and showed him a bit angry face.

"Kia hua? " he asked after looking at my face.

"Ap khana khaye gy tab ye betiya raani ap se baat kare gi warna nahi kare gi " I said with turning my face on the other side

"Arayy! Ye toh bohat bari dhamki hai bhai! Khana khaa hi lena chahiye. " I said while picking up the tray. I watched him eating. And just prayed in my heart mere baba mama ko mujh se kabhi mat door karna mere Allah. In ko sehat aur lambi umar atta farma.

"Chalo jee ab toh hum ne khaa bhi lia ab toh galay lag jao. " he said again.

He acts so cute sometimes. I smiled and stood up and placed the tablets on my hand for him to take these.

I placed my hand infront of him. He looked up towards me made a face saying he dont want to have these. And I said " okay then no hug. "

"Acha jee lao khaa lety han. Wse lagta hai k mai tumhara baap nahi hun tum meri maa ho" he said laughing.

When he was done, I also sat on bed with him and hugged him and just lied in the same position I was lying last night. He started running his fingers through my hair. This was what I needed, relaxation. Mama also came and sat on the sofa beside bed and just saw us.

I did courage to speak and break the silence,

" Mama !baba! "

"Jee meri jaan" baba replied.

"Ap jo bhi faisla kary gay woh mere huq ma behtar hi hoye ga na. Toh jo ap ko sahi lagta ha woh kar lai. Mujhe koi aitaraz nahi hai. Ap jis marzi proposal par han kahy. Bas ap ki khushi mai hi meri khushi hai. " I said

Baba kissed my head and then held my face and made me sit. My eyes were lowered. He again kissed my forehead and again asked,"meri jaan khush raho. Abad raho. Allah har baap ko tumhare jaisi beti atta farmaye. " he then hugged me and I broke into tears. Not because I was sad. Just because I became the reason of his smile. Mama was also happy.

That was all I needed. Their HAPPINESS.

°°°°°°°°°°

A new phase of life is about to start in soha's life. And what about Sheharyar? Is he happy with this?

I'll be back with another update.

With love,

.