《Reaching the Sky》14
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i think it's much more better if you read the first part of this chapter while listening to the song above hihi ang hobby ko ay manakit at magpaoverthink, sana lahamz niyo pa rin ako. mwa hihi eat dinner and enjoy, readers!
ps: i found this funny again huhu look kung gaano ako kabaliw sa robredo sisters. sila na lang laman ng tiktok ko. pakasalan mo na kasi ako, doc tricia!
I slowly opened the door of my room matapos naming mag usap ni Inay sa labas. Pag bukas ko ay bumungad sa akin si Tricia na nakasandal sa kama habang buhat n'ya si Lian, pareho silang tulog na.
Inikot ko ang paningin ko para hanapin si Jill and I found her sa may crib ni Lian, inaayos n'ya 'yon.
Hindi n'ya ako napansin agad kaya ako na ang lumapit para tulungan s'yang mag ayos.
"Hey, Jill," tawag ko.
Hindi n'ya ako pinansin at nag tuloy lang s'ya sa ginagawa niya.
"Jillian," I called her once again.
"That's not my name, ah. I'm Bubby,"
Natahimik ako. Agad naman s'yang tumawa. "Chill, just kidding!" sabi n'ya at hinampas ako nung unan na hawak n'ya.
"Got nervous for a second," pagsakay ko sa sinabi n'ya.
Kahit na alam kong hindi naman 'yon joke para sa kaniya.
"Tho yes, nakakatampo ka minsan, ah. You rarely call me by our cs na," aniya at tinupi 'yong bimpo ni Lian. "Sus, dumating lang si Ate Trish, e." she said and laughed.
Iniwan n'ya ako sa tabi ng crib at pumunta kina Lian. She kissed Lian. That kiss lasted for a few seconds.
Nilagyan n'ya ng unan sa ulo ang Ate n'ya at kinumutan ito. Matapos n'yang gawin 'yon ay tiningnan niya ako.
"May kailangan ka ba rito?" She asked. "Dito ka ba tutulog?"
Umiling ako. "I'll sleep sa couch, you can sleep here. Tabihan mo na Ate Tricia mo," I said at dumiretso sa cabinet para kumuha ng unan at kumot.
Pag balik ko sa kama ay nakahiga na si Jill. She's closing her eyes.
Dahan dahan akong nag lakad papunta kay Lian and I kissed him good night. I looked at Tricia once more bago lumingon kay Jill. Hindi na s'ya nag bukas ng mata.
Inayos kong muli ang kumot nila bago tuluyang nag lakad papunta sa switch ng ilaw. Nang mapatay ko ang ilaw ay nag dilim ang buong kwarto at yung maliit na lamp na lang sa tabi ng kama ang nag silbing ilaw.
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The moment I touched the doorknob, napatigil ako.
Someone hugged me from behind.
This feeling is familiar. Kahit hindi ko tingnan ay alam ko kung sino 'to.
Her warmth. I can still feel how her warmth comforts me.
But it felt different from before.
It's not the same.
It will never be the same again.
"Bubby," dahan dahang bigkas ko.
"I don't want to let go," she said.
Naririnig ko sa boses n'ya na umiiyak s'ya.
Jill is crying. She's hurting.
And so am I.
"I wish I heard those words before when I needed them the most,"
A tear escaped my eyes.
"Good night, Jillian."
Right after I said that, I slowly removed her hands that is wrapped around my waist and left the room.
The moment I closed the door, I broke down. Napaupo ako sa sahig at sumandal sa pinto. I covered my mouth using my hands so that no one can hear me.
I'm here again.
Nandito na naman ako sa posisyon na 'to.
Crying alone, crying silently.
I'm tired. Make this stop, please.
Kinaumagahan, nagising ako when I felt Toffee licking my cheeks. When I opened my eyes, I saw Toffee sa harap ko, and Tricia sa likod n'ya. She's holding Toffee while smiling and watching what the dog is doing to me.
And then I remembered what happened last night. I broke down, but then again, nalampasan ko. As if I have a choice. And looking at Tricia now made me realize na she's right. We shouldn't dwell sa sad and pain feeling. We should keep on moving forward.
I will keep on moving forward, especially now that I have her as a reason to keep on fighting and look forward to waking up every day.
"Good morning, Daddy!" Tricia greeted, trying to talk for Toffee habang ikinakaway ang paa nito.
"Good morning, baby." She looked at me at agad naman akong tumingin kay Toffee at kinuha ito sa kan'ya. "Good morning, my very pogi baby!"
Pasimple kong tinitingnan ang reaksyon n'ya. Nakatitig lang s'ya sakin pero agad din namang nakisabay sa pag lalambing kay Toffee.
Nag kulitan pa kami hanggang sa pinuntahan na kami ni Inay at inaya na kumain. Ako dapat ang mag luluto pero dahil late na ako nagising ay s'ya na raw ang gumawa.
Naupo kami at nag simulang kumain nang mapansin kong kulang kami.
Jill is not here.
Nang kuhanin ko ang tumbler ko ay may sticky note na nakadikit doon.
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I had to go home early, I forgot Mama and I have lakad. I'm sorry about last night. I love you, bubby.
- Jill
Nakita ni Inay na nabasa ko na 'yong sticky note. "Umalis na s'ya kanina pang umaga. Nauna pa s'yang magising sa akin,"
Tumango tango ako at inilagay sa bulsa ko yung note.
"Hindi ko alam kung nauna ba s'ya o wala pang tulog ang batang 'yon," dagdag ni Inay.
"May nangyari ba kagabi? Bakit s'ya nag sorry sayo?" Tricia asked while eating.
"Tricia, anak tikman mo 'to, masarap 'yan." Alok ni Inay sa kaniya.
Inay looked at me and slightly nodded. I smiled at her.
I looked at Tricia and she's happy eating while patting Toffee's head na nasa tabi n'ya at kumakain din.
Tricia looks so good sa morning look n'ya.
Lord, natulog at gumising din naman po ako pero hindi ako ganito kafresh.
"Alam kong crush mo ako pero huwag mo akong titigan nang ganiyan, ah. Nahahalata ka,"
"I'm looking at Toffee, not you," pag papalusot ko.
She shrugged at nag tuloy sa pagkain. Kumain na lang din ako at nang matapos ay nag ayos at naligo na kami ni Tricia dahil iuuwi ko na s'ya sa condo.
Hinahanap ko 'yong pants ko nang biglang nag ring ang phone ko. Tita is calling.
"Good morning, Tita," bati ko at inipit ang cellphone sa tenga at balikat ko dahil may kinukuha ako.
"Hello, nak. Puwede mo bang dalhin dito ang apo ko? Isama mo na rin ang Inay. Dito na muna sila mag stay,"
"Sure, Tita. Matutuwa po sila for sure," sagot ko and I heard Tita giggled. "Pero why so sudden po?"
"I'll tell you later pag dating n'yo rito," she said.
I was about to answer when Tita talked again. "Jill, I'm talking to Y/N, do you want to say hi?"
Napatigil ako, Jill is there also.
"No na, Ma." I heard her answered.
"Hmm, Y/N hindi ba kayo okay ng bunso ko?" Tita asked.
Napalunok ako. "We're okay, Tita. Nag paalam na po kasi s'ya kanina bago siya umuwi d'yan,"
This is not yet the right time, Tita I'm sorry.
Kahit gaano ko kagustong ipaalam na sa kanila. I can't. Ayokong pangunahan si Jillian. Nag usap kami noon na pareho naming sasabihin 'yon at pareho kaming mag dedesisyon sa bagay na 'yon, and I respect that.
"I see, okay ingat kayo papunta rito, ha? Say hi to Tricia for me."
"Will do, Tita."
S'ya na ang nag baba ng tawag at saktong lumabas ng banyo si Tricia. She's just wearing a sando.
Napaiwas ako ng tingin. "Ah, I'm sorry may.. may hinahanap lang ako,"
Minadali ko ang pag hahanap at nahulog pa 'yong ilang damit dahil sa pag mamadali ko. Agad ko itong pinulot at lumapit naman si Tricia para tulungan ako.
"Ayan kasi, bakit nag mamadali?"
Ang lapit na naman n'ya sa akin.
"Ano uh anong oras na kasi oo, diba baka mag aantay na si Tita,"
Napatigil s'ya sa pag kuha ng mga damit na nahulog. Mukhang nahalata n'yang kinakabahan ako.
Lord, please wag naman po sana.
Hindi ako nag aangat ng tingin sa kaniya at nag tuloy lang sa pag aayos na animo'y walang nangyayari.
"Y/N," tawag n'ya.
"Huh?" Mabilis na sagot ko at hindi pa rin s'ya tinitingnan.
"Look at me," utos n'ya.
Her voice.. from a softie to a very boss vibes na tono.
Deliks 'to.
But still, hindi ako tumingin. Nag kunwari akong walang narinig at mas binilisan ang pag aayos.
Last damit, yes last damit!
Bago ko matupi 'yong huling damit ay lumuhod s'yang muli para mapantayan ako.
I gulped.
Isa na lang, isa na lang 'to.
Sa sobrang taranta ko ay hindi ko na maayos ang tupi nung damit.
I was shocked when Tricia suddenly held my face and made me look at her.
Lord, yung tingin po. Nakakapanghina ng kalamnan.
"I said, look at me," she said with full of authority sa boses n'ya. "When I'm talking to you," she gently let her fingers slide from my cheeks and my jaw line papunta sa chin ko. Inangat n'ya ang mukha ko. "You should keep your eyes focused on me,"
She slowly closed the gap between us at bigla s'yang lumihis papunta sa tenga ko. "At sa akin lang, you get that?"
Hindi ko alam anong nangyayari sa akin pero agad akong napatango. It's like she's hypnotizing me. Nawawala ako sa katinuan.
I thought aalis na lang s'ya bigla but then when she's about to stand up.
She kissed my cheeks quickly at tumakbo palabas.
Lord, ano po 'yon?
Shet, sabihin n'yo ano 'yon?
Did Tricia really just.. kissed me?
Akala ko baliw na ako, may mas ibabaliw pa pala.
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